by Nella Tyler
In the meantime, in keeping with a nightie, a loose, mussed-up look would work perfectly. She tapped on her curling iron and pulled open the drawer of makeup, most of which had already begun to dry up with age. She pulled out vials and bottles of different textures and colors. She quickly plucked her eyebrows and then gently darkened them with an eyebrow pencil.
Eyeliner came next and with mischief in mind, she extended the line beyond her eyelid in an upward swirl. It gave her a hopeful look, one might even consider it playful. Reminding herself this was all about play, she kept going. She mixed a palette of eyeshadows, hues that complemented her eyes and blended to make her look more exotic. Mascara, foundation, blush and concealer finished the look.
The curling iron was heated by then and she rolled large hunks of her long hair around the barrel, lifting the strands in a sort of careless, windblown way. She teased a few portions at the crown and pushed the hair on one side behind her ear. The asymmetrical look made her interesting – a word “she never would’ve used to describe herself. But this was different.
Carefully slipping off her clothes so as not to muss up her hair, she smoothly slid the robin’s egg nightie over her head and let it settle on her shoulders. She had, indeed, lost weight since she had purchased it. If anything, it looked more alluring now as her collarbones were more highly defined and there were angles and definition in her face, now highlighted by the makeup. Using her hands, she flipped her hair one more time, picked up her cell phone, and went in search of an appropriate background.
She wandered about the house for a while and with this sudden inspiration, picked up a potted plant that was currently in bloom. She carried it into her bedroom and set it on the nightstand. Her only lamp sat on the opposite nightstand and she pulled a soft pink slip from her drawer and laid it over the lampshade. The effect was a muted rose light that shone behind her when she sat on the bed and leaned back against the padded headboard.
She felt naughty, and it felt good.
Mackenzie picked up her phone and tried a few sample photos with it. She set it for three second delay, giving herself enough time to set just the right look on her face. Extending her arm to full-length, she turned the phone toward herself and pushed the button.
Eagerly, she tapped on the picture to see it at full size. She laughed when she saw that she caught herself with her eyes half closed. Nothing about that is going to make a man want to talk to me, she mused to herself.
She tried a few more shots, adjusting the angle and height of the phone and then comparing the results. She decided that an angle from just above her head looked best. The green plant framed her and accented her hair color. Perhaps it might seem odd to be sitting next to a house plant in a nightgown, but the overall texture and color effect was very pleasing.
She finally settled on one and emailed it to herself. Throwing on a robe, she silently went back to her computer and brought up the email. She had a simple photo editing program and used it to slightly adjust the lighting and crop the photo. Turning back to the website, she uploaded the news photo “and captioned it “midnight blues.”
“There,” she said. “I’ve done about all the damage I’m going to do for now.” She got up and went into the kitchen to make herself a second cup of tea and was waiting for the microwave when she heard the ding from the next room.
Karma22: Are you online?
Of course, I’m online! How could you talk to me if I weren’t?
AliceWonderland: Yes, I’m right here. Doesn’t the system tell you that?
Karma22: Sometimes it lies.
AliceWonderland: Mine shows a little green dot next to certain names. I thought that meant they were online?
Karma22: They want you to think there are more people online than there actually are.
Again, Mackenzie realized she had waded into a world where nothing was as it seemed.
Karma22: I like you in the blue. In fact, it’s my favorite color.
AliceWonderland: Why, thank you. It’s very nice of you to say.
Karma22: I bet I would like what’s underneath it, too.
Mackenzie’s mouth dropped open as his words began to sink in. In her traditional, proper world, no one had ever used such suggestive behavior toward her; she was to totally unprepared how to handle it. She had been brought up well-mannered and realized that she was actually sitting there contemplating response to that.
Horrified, she clicked the message box shut and then found a button marked “Block” and quickly clicked on it, as well. Mackenzie shuddered, unused to that feeling of anonymous violation. It was something she’d never had to deal with before. At the same time, she realized this was the world she had chosen to enter and wondered whether her choice had been such a wise one.
Just then came the ding that signaled a new box pop up.
TomB: Care to talk?
Mackenzie looked at the simple words on the screen and debated whether to respond at all. She felt fleeced, embarrassed, and a little concerned that someone who might know her might actually see her there. Then she realized no one would know her screen name, although they would recognize her pictures. She would have to tread carefully.
AliceWonderland: Perhaps. What are you looking for?
TomB: Just a nice lady, roughly my own age, to chat with. I was about to log off when I saw your profile name pop up under new members. I thought I would take a moment to introduce myself.
AliceWonderland: The screen says that you’re more than six hundred miles from me. Should I assume from this that you’re merely looking for pen pal?
TomB: I won’t say that if I found the right lady, I might not be willing to move, but for the time being, would it hurt to get to know one another?
AliceWonderland: I suppose not. Tell me a little bit about yourself.
TomB: Where to start? I’m divorced. Three sons. Two grandchildren. I stay pretty active and like to rock climb.
AliceWonderland: Really? I don’t think I’ve ever talked to anyone before who did rock climbing. I mean, I’ve seen them do it at a gym, but I’m guessing that’s not what you’re talking about?
TomB: Not really. The rocks I climb are little bigger, I’m afraid.
AliceWonderland: I had a feeling you’d say that. I’m afraid I’m not anywhere as adventurous as you are. I work in an office, kind of boring, and most of all, I’m alone since I was widowed a couple years ago.
TomB: I’m sorry for your loss.
AliceWonderland: I have to ask you something. I know people customarily say something like that when they hear another person mention a bereavement. I feel funny mentioning it on a website for dating, but is that sort of expected?
TomB: I guess that’s sort of up to you. I’ve talked to other women in your shoes and some of them use it like a plea for help. Personally, I think it’s alright to mention that you’re widowed, after all it is on your profile, but that might not be my lead-in line, so to speak. Do you think you’re ready for dating?
AliceWonderland: That’s the million-dollar question I keep asking myself. My friends keep telling me that it’s time. I don’t know that there’s a rule for that sort of thing, but then, here I am.
TomB: What are you looking for in a man?
AliceWonderland: You know, until your question, I really never gave it much thought. I guess I was so busy constructing my own profile, it didn’t occur to me to be so specific in what I was looking for. It feels a little judgmental, to tell you the truth.
TomB: Too bad you live so far away. You sound like a really nice woman. Of course, I have lots of frequent flyer miles stashed away. You wouldn’t happen to have a spare bed?
Mackenzie stared at the words on the screen. Was it always going to be like this? Was every simple conversation going to turn into a sex proposal? She hoped she hadn’t wasted her time, her money, and more importantly, her innocence. As it was, it felt as though she was betraying David, although she knew that was silly.
AliceWonderland: I’m sorry. Perhaps I gave you
the wrong impression, although I don’t think so. Is there code for a woman who sincerely is looking for friendship without sex?
TomB: Not that I know of.
AliceWonderland: That’s what I figured. Bye.
With that, she clicked shut the chat window and blocked him, as well. As if timed, a new window popped up.
HarryM: Your time is up. Still think I’m so bad?
AliceWonderland: You were right, of course.
HarryM: So, how bad was it?
AliceWonderland: I’d like to think that’s as bad as it can possibly get, but somehow I don’t think that’s true.
HarryM: How many times did you give out your email?
AliceWonderland: Email? I didn’t.
HarryM: Good girl, you’re learning fast.
AliceWonderland: Thanks, but it wasn’t because I knew better. It was because no one had asked.
HarryM: Okay, I can see we’ve got a bit of work to do.
AliceWonderland: Excuse me?
HarryM: Your online training program. You still have a ways to go before you get the hang of it. I’m going to have to work on your privacy issues first. Lesson one. Never give out your email until you spoken to the guy online for at least three times.
AliceWonderland: Why three times?
HarryM: Because if he hangs in there for three different conversations, there’s a better chance that he’s legit. Anything under that and he’s trolling for your email address.
AliceWonderland: But what can he really do with my email address?
HarryM: Oh, not too much. Sign you up for a million different free emails and clog your inbox. If he’s in a good mood, he may only empty your bank account. If you make him mad, he could wipe out everything you have, including your reputation on social media.
AliceWonderland: Oh, my God. Are you serious?
HarryM: Deadly. Of course, if you don’t believe me, you can give it a try and see what happens?
AliceWonderland: No, thank you. So, what’s next?
HarryM: Well, let’s begin with why you are here. Are you looking for new marriage?
AliceWonderland: No, I’m looking for just a pen pal at this point.
HarryM: Have you considered simply making a Facebook account?
AliceWonderland: Yes, I get that. But I like something a little more private.
HarryM: Do you understand the difference between casual and a long-term relationship?
AliceWonderland: I believe so. A casual relationship means that they just want to be friends, right?
HarryM: Well, in a manner of speaking. It means they want friends with privileges.
AliceWonderland: Wait, now you’ve completely lost me. What’s the difference between friends with privileges and friends without privileges?
HarryM: Sex.
Mackenzie’s mouth dropped open. She felt like she was in a foreign country and didn’t know the language. This could get dangerous, and fast.
HarryM: Are you still there?
AliceWonderland: Yes, and trying to figure out what I’ve got myself in for.
HarryM: Don’t worry. I’ll give you some pointers. Beyond that, as long as you know the ropes, this isn’t a bad place – in fact it’s probably the best of the worst. Whatever that means. There are a lot of opportunities out there.
AliceWonderland: Don’t I know it.
HarryM: The next thing you need to learn is that the guys who sound too good to be true, are actually that. There are certain operators who know how to tell a woman what they want to hear and when everything’s over, you will probably been raped, broke, and most certainly should be checking with the doctor for STDs. I don’t think you’re that kind of lady, so I’m going to warn you about the bad stuff first. There have also been the assorted kidnappings and murders.
AliceWonderland: Oh my God, what have I let myself in for?
HarryM: You keep asking that. Don’t you know?
AliceWonderland: No, I guess I really don’t. I suppose that sounds fairly naïve.
HarryM: Just a little bit.
AliceWonderland: Look, I think I’ve had enough for tonight. I’m going to sign off now and give us all some thought. Maybe this just isn’t for me, at all.
HarryM: That’s entirely possible. You sleep well now.
Chapter Three
Mackenzie turned off the computer, sitting back in her chair as she thought about the odd experience she just had in that strange world of online dating. It felt scary, uncertain, and she couldn’t relate to it. If this is how people meet, I think I’ll be alone.
On Saturday, she busied herself cleaning the house, paying some bills, and then headed to the grocery store. She decided she was going to look at the world through different eyes. She parked her car and got out, adjusting her clothes before she went into the store.
Immediately inside the doors was the produce department. She knew all the stories about meeting someone in the produce department and consciously stood a little taller and smiled a little more frequently as she roamed from aisle to aisle. Mackenzie wasn’t sure there was a man anywhere in the store who might be potential for her, but she had taken care when she applied her makeup and she wasn’t going to waste the entire effect. She smiled at absolutely everyone.
As she approached the check out, she noticed with some chagrin that there were long lines. She hated waiting in lines of store. Standing back and trying to choose the fastest candidate, she was thrilled to see a cashier who must’ve come off of break and was opening a new line.
From her vantage point, she figured she could make it there first. Determined, she hunched forward a bit in an effort to make the best time. Just as she was about to close in on her target, another cart came from the right. This one was pushed by a tall man wearing sunglasses.
She judged the closing distance and immediately realized they were going to crash into one another unless one of them slowed down. He looked up and saw her at the same moment, and as gentlemen should, he did slow down, even sweeping his hand forward to indicate that she should go first. She remembered herself, straightening her hunched shoulders and gave him a big smile.
“Thank you,” she said politely.
“You’re welcome,” said the stranger with the sunglasses.
Mackenzie busied herself unloading her purchases onto the conveyor belt. She tried to surreptitiously study the man and to her delight, he pushed the sunglasses up onto the top of his head and her heart stopped as she saw brilliant blue eyes and the slightest salt-and-pepper beginning in his sideburns. He was broad shouldered, and she was interested.
She had loaded four gallons of water onto the back of her cart. With every bit of her feminine wiles, she stopped and contemplated the heavy gallons. He was waiting for her to move forward before he could begin unloading his purchases.
“Here, let me,” he said, moving forward and bending low to grab all for gallons at once, two in each hand.
“How sweet of you,” Mackenzie gushed. She studied his hands long enough to see that there was no wedding ring on his left hand, not even the white ring of skin where one could have recently rested. Secretly she was thrilled. At that point, she had asked herself what to do next.
“Hi, I’m new to the store and I wondered if you might know where they keep the aspirin?” As soon as the words left her mouth, she blushed and felt like an absolute idiot.
Lining the checkout were shelves of impulse items, including at least a dozen giant bottles of aspirin. The man in the sunglasses smiled and pointed at them in a rather obvious manner.
“You mean, like those?” he smiled.
Mackenzie nodded, embarrassed. She had no choice now but to pick up one of the bottles and add it to her purchases on the conveyor belt. “Thank you,” she murmured softly.
“Something tells me you weren’t exactly after aspirin,” he suggested.
“What gave me away?”
“Let’s just say, women don’t typically ask men where something is in a grocery store. A hardwa
re store, okay. Maybe even an auto parts store, we’ve got you covered. A grocery store? Sorry, but you ladies are all on your own.” His voice was pleasant and conversational, even if a bit mocking, but she deserved it.
“You’ve got me pegged,” she admitted. She held out her hand. “I’m Mackenzie Harper, and I’m thoroughly embarrassed.”
“Why embarrassed?”
“It’s really too long of a story to get into in a checkout line, especially when there are people waiting,” she said with a smile and motioned to the people waiting behind him with the role of her eyes.
“How about if we have a cup of coffee in the café at the end of the store after I’ve checked out?”
Mackenzie drew in her breath. It really works this easily? She nodded. “See you there in five minutes.”
She paid for her groceries, turned and smiled at him with a wink. Feeling totally like a hussy at this point, Mackenzie pushed her groceries toward the café that was located at the end of the store, just inside the furthest exit. Feeling completely like a fish out of water, she didn’t know whether she should buy herself a coffee, buy them both a coffee, or wait for him to arrive. She opted for the latter.
Finding an open table near the window, she sat down and opened her bag, rifling through it for her comb and lipstick. Then, she realized that without a mirror, the lipstick would be impossible. She didn’t want to pull a comb out in the middle of a food area, so that was out, as well. She ran her fingers through her hair subconsciously with a sigh, sat back to wait.
There was a young couple with a child a few tables away. They caught her attention as they seemed to be arguing. It wasn’t difficult to overhear that it had something to do with money she had spent in the store that she shouldn’t have.
The guy, whom she assumed was the husband, was lecturing the woman on sticking to their budget or they would never be able to afford the down payment on a house that they wanted. She, on the other hand, was pouting and telling him that if he were to get a better paying job, she would be able to cut back on the stingy ration of money he was giving her.
Mackenzie felt for each of them, but perhaps more so for the child who, seated between them, looked from parent to parent space with distress. The couple went on to bicker about their next biggest complaint with one another and Mackenzie forced herself to look elsewhere. It upset her to hear people fight.