I nod once, too stuck in my own thoughts to strike up more conversation.
“Alright. The Skulls have a direct tie to the Steele brothers, who Lucian works for and is well acquainted with. I’m going to give Reed a call and see if he can do anything to get him to put you under the masking program again.”
“No, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Why not?” Damon asks.
“Lucian,” I close my eyes, “Lucian and I used to fuck. The only reason he did that for me is because I was fucking him. I’m not sure if it’s because he cared, or if he wanted more. It could’ve been both, but nothing would ever happen between us. We’d never be in a relationship.”
“Okay, so why is it my problem you two used to fuck? I have a connection with Reed and I can see if he can call in a favor.”
“Lucian will want something,” I say, feeling even more nervous about this now.
“Okay, so, we’ll give him what he wants.” The way Damon says it. It’s like he seriously underestimates Lucian and how much of a filthy bastard he can be. I suppose it doesn’t matter to him. Lucian will end up asking for something only I can give him.
Chapter Nine
Our lives may not have fit together, but oh did our souls know how to dance
~ K. Towne Jr,
Mouser
Sakura was a sneaky little bitch this morning and snuck out right under my nose. I was in the shower and she was gone. I texted Kade and he told me she was in with Ivy, so I didn’t fret. I should’ve marched my ass over there and watched her the way Damon wanted me too but fuck it. I knew she was safe.
Although, in hindsight I should’ve been a bit closer because Damon ended up chewing me out because she got to the clubhouse without me within sight and he noticed. He was easier on me than I thought he’d be, but Widow ended up telling me Kat’s pregnant and everyone found out today. I guess that’s why I didn’t get it any worse.
Damon filled me in on how the two of them had a conversation and he’s working with Reed from the Skulls Renegade MC. Reed has a personal connection with the Steele brothers out in Atlanta. If memory serves me right, Seamus, Reed’s enforcer grew up with them. Anyway, Damon’s trying to see if Lucian will put her back in that program he created. When Damon and Sakura had a chat, Damon said Sakura was adamant Lucian would want something. He mentioned how the way she said it was a little odd.
I’ll put my money on it that Lucian guy is someone I won’t be too keen on. He sounds like a fuckin’ tool from what Eduardo said. It sounds like the two of them were fucking around for a bit, and then when she ended it he put her in jeopardy. Who in the fuck does that shit? I don’t even give a damn, if I had the option to keep my exes safe like that, I wouldn’t remove them from it. Just because we didn’t work doesn’t mean I’d want them dead.
“Dad! Can we go get some tacos?” Zoe, Widow’s daughter he shares with an ex asks. She lives with her mom most of the time, but she does come here on the weekends and he picks her up on Wednesdays when she gets out of school early. She’ll stay here with us until her stepdad comes to get her. Widow and Rebel may have had a disastrous relationship from what I’ve heard, but you’d never know that now. They put their issues behind them and are raising their daughter in a positive environment.
“Yeah, sure. Wanna go now?” Widow asks the girl.
“Duh!” She replies ecstatically. Zoe rises from the couch she’s sitting on and runs up over to me, grabs my hand and jumps up and down. “Mousie, you have to come too. Please, Dad!” She turns back to her father who rolls his eyes. Meanwhile, I’m giving him a plea that screams ‘save me’.
“Fine, but you gotta give me a minute. Okay? I need to bring a friend with us.”
“Oh, who?”
“You know Sakura, right? She’s over there,” I kneel down and point to Sakura, who’s wearing a pair of black jeans with a black top that has cutouts on the sleeves and over her chest.
“Is she your girlfriend or something?” Zoe grumbles.
“Uh, no, she isn’t my girlfriend. Why?” I ask, keeping my voice as low as Zoe’s.
“Because, we’re supposed to get married when I’m old enough.” She hisses at me, loud enough for her father and everyone else in the club to hear.
“Aw, Zoe. You have a crush on Mouser?” Camila giggles, walking over.
“That’s so adorable.” Tania, Widow’s Ol’ Lady confirms.
“I do not. I’m in love with him!” Zoe argues, storming off through the clubhouse door. Widow ends up rushing after her. From the corner of my eye I see Ivy elbow Sakura in the side and start giggling.
“I hope everyone here heard that. I’m a high commodity these days,” I speak up, ensuring Sakura heard. Ivy keeps giggling over in the corner and I decide to go over. “C’mon,” I say to Sakura, motioning with my hand for her to come with me.
“Huh? Where are we going?”
“I want tacos now. We’ll go to a little restaurant down the way. They have some killer nachos too.” I explain. She’d better make the decision on her own soon, ‘cause I’m fuckin’ hungry and in about ten seconds I’ll have no problem throwing her over my shoulder and taking her with me by force.
Sakura looks to Ivy, almost like she’s unsure of what to do before she shrugs her shoulders and starts walking toward me. The two of us head out of the clubhouse and go over to my bike. Silently, I’m thanking the heavens it’s only breaking a hundred today. Yesterday was far too much for all of us.
I throw my leg over my bike and slide my key in, starting her up. Turning my head back, Sakura is standing there, looking a bit unsure. “What’s wrong? Hop on.” I holler, ensuring she can hear me while I put my helmet on.
“I . . . uh. The only time I’ve ever been on a motorcycle has been when my adrenaline’s been high,” Sakura says, making a scared sort of expression.
I extend my hand and look her right in the eyes. “Sakura, you can trust me. I won’t let anything happen to you. Just hold on to me real tight and close your eyes if it gets to be too much. Alright?” I take the spare helmet off Kade’s bike and toss it over to Sakura who ends up putting it on.
Bingo. Looks like we’re good to go. She comes up to me, places her hands on my shoulders and throws one leg over the bike. Her arms go around my torso while her chin is on the back of my shoulder. Hell, I feel like one of those monkeys that others cling to.
Before Sakura can change her mind, we’re off driving down the dirt lane and pull off onto the highway. We head north for about fifteen minutes until we reach the perfect taco joint I was talkin’ about and pull off to the side. It doesn’t look like much from the outside with the shutters starting to fall off, paint chipping on the front door and tiles missing from the roof. I don’t mind the aesthetic keepin’ people away, though.
I prop the kickstand and pull the keys from the ignition, sliding them in my pocket. Sakura gets off the bike first and places the helmet on the handlebars. This might sound stupid, but it makes me smile for some reason. I take my helmet off, dismount my bike and head inside alongside her. I go up to the counter and put in an order, getting practically everything on the menu and a couple Jarritos while Sakura’s in the ladies’ room. By the time I’m finished ordering she’s out, and I have the number we need to put on our table, with the drinks.
“Damon said he had a chat with you,” I start off saying, waiting to see what sort of information she’ll give me. While I understand a small bit about Sakura, there’s so much I’ve yet to discover. I wouldn’t mind getting to know her a bit more, though, and her fuckin’ body. I’m not done drilling myself into her. She’s a fuckin’ vixen, kept my cock hard all night long. I don’t think we fell asleep until four or five this morning.
Sakura rolls her eyes, “Yeah. He has such a brilliant plan.”
“I love the sarcasm, you really sold it.” I say, smirking as I pop off the caps to our bottles.
“Thanks,”
“What’s buggin’ you about it?” I a
sk, somehow getting the feeling something is driving her mad.
“He wants to somehow get Lucian to put me back in his system. That’s all great and dandy, but you don’t know the man like I do. He’ll want something, and I don’t think he’ll want something you can give him.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask, handing her the fruit punch one while I keep the grape.
I take a sip while I wait for her response. “He’ll want something only I can offer.”
I think about what she’s saying, and I believe she’s insinuating something, but I don’t like playing mind reading games like this. “Wanna break that down for me?”
“Knowing Lucian, I would bet my life on the fact he’ll want to sleep with me one last time.” Don’t know the fucker but can’t say I blame him. Sakura is a good lay, but man does it boil somethin’ in my blood imagining her with another man.
“Do you want to, fuck him that is?”
“If I wanted to, I wouldn’t have stopped our little rendezvous. And not that it’s any of your business, but if I wanted to be with him, I would’ve run to him, not my godfather.” Sakura rolls her eyes, taking a sip of the fruit punch drink. Obviously. I’ve struck a nerve.
“Just checking. Wanna make sure you’re saving all of this for me,” I grumble, slipping my hand under the table I make sure to glide my finger up her thigh until I’m directly over her pussy, running it back and forth a couple of times.
“I’m not yours.”
“Not yet.”
“I won’t ever be, Mouser. I’m not interested in a relationship.”
“You say that now, but at some point I’ll change your mind, even if it kills me.”
“Why would you say something like that? You’re not in love with me. It doesn’t make sense.”
I chuckle. She wouldn’t understand. “No, I don’t love you. I’m in lust with you. Something about you has made my cock hard for weeks. I want to chase after you like a dog chases sheep. Love isn’t something that just happens, Dove. It’s forged over time, sometimes with flaming hot moments, others with sad. Between it all lies the normal ones.”
“You want to be in a relationship with me?”
I shake my head, “Not now, but I have a strong feelin’ like sooner or later my mind is gonna change, and there won’t be anything that will stop me from having you, Sakura. Not even some sourpuss of an ex-fuck who wants your cunt. And mark my words, if he so much as tries to touch you, I’m going to break his fuckin’ jaw.”
Chapter Ten
Love isn’t about being sexually attracted. That’s lust. It’s about actually caring about someone
~ Unknown
Sakura
All I can do right now is blankly stare at the man sitting across the table from me, trying to understand what’s going through his mind. He full on just admitted he isn’t in love with me, but lusts after me. Honestly, it sounds like he’s some player on the prowl. Or at least, that’s what I thought at first. Mouser made it a point to be transparent with me and tell me what he thinks is going to end up happening.
I don’t know how that makes me feel.
Honestly, I just feel numb. Not excited. Not freaked out. I’m just a woman, sitting across from a man who essentially vomited his future plans on me and I’m . . . just here.
All my life I knew I was not the type to be in a relationship. I’m not the type of woman who commits herself to a man only to get hurt or be used. After thinking about it, I realize why I’ve always felt that way. On my eighteenth birthday I remember I was called into my father’s office after dinner. It was the first day we ever drank sake afterwards and he had me sit on the couch across from my mother and he, while he went on to tell me I’d need to start thinking about the well-being of our family. I didn’t understand him then, but he made sure I grasped the idea that I would be like any other daughter of a powerful family. I would be married off to the son of someone just as powerful, used as a tool in yet another way.
This is why I don’t like the idea of commitment, because of my fucking family problems. Family issues. Whatever you want to call it. I roll my eyes as the memory resurfaces and my stomach turns at the thought of feeling a small semblance of what I felt that evening.
“You alright?” Mouser asks, reaching his hand across the table to grab mine. With each action I’m not sure what to make of him. If he was just lusting after me like he said, he wouldn’t have made it a point to try and offer me comfort, right?
“Um, yeah. I’m a bit taken aback by what you just confessed. I don’t understand it.”
“You don’t understand what?” He questions, drawing his brows together while his expression shifts. Now he’s confused.
“Why me? What is it about me that has you wanting me this way, or in the way you think you might?”
Mouser chuckles, and somehow his laugh feels like a breath of fresh air. With my hand in his, he rubs his thumb over the back of mine and looks at me with those delicate eyes of his. Eyes that hold so much strength but are the key to his kind heart. “You don’t have any idea just how much of a gem you are. Sakura, you’re smart. You’re sweet. You gave up the one thing that could keep you safe to save a baby. The honor you have is . . . a rarity at best. It doesn’t hurt that you’re gorgeous as all hell. In my eyes, you’re the whole package and I can tell you have high walls. I’m not a man who’s in a rush and I don’t mean to scare you, but I’m gonna break them down bit by bit until you feel comfortable with the idea of being with me.”
“Whoa. I thought you said you felt like you might? Not that you did.”
Mouser laughs yet again, “Why in God’s name would I give up the whole package?”
“Ugh, I need a drink.” I grumble, wishing this fruity soda was sake instead. Mouser might not know this, but he’s a complete mindfuck. I thought I knew what he was getting at earlier, but now I’m even more confused.
Mouser’s cell phone begins vibrating from the corner of the table. He’s quick to pick it up and looks at the screen. “It’s Damon. Reed reached out to Jordan Steele, who’s handling the darker parts of their family business these days. He’s assured us Lucian will be putting you back in the masking program within the hour.”
I’m sure the Reapers believe this is a good thing, but I’ve already been taken out of it, meaning my parents could’ve already discovered my whereabouts. Although, Mouser has a grim look on his face. “What’s wrong, you don’t seem relieved.”
“Gathering what I can about your family, I figure they’re relentless. You and I can probably agree they have people behind computers looking into facial recognition software for even a glimpse of you. That being said, they’ve probably figured something out by now.”
“I thought I’d be the only one who’d be a pessimist.”
He shrugs, “I can be on occasion. I know how families can be, so . . .”
“I doubt your family can be as horrid as mine.”
“They aren’t that bad, but we have our issues.” Mouser states, looking through the window to avoid meeting his eyes with mine.
“You know everything about my life from what I can tell. Might as well share a bit about yours so we’re even.”
Mouser looks back at me, closes his eyes and chuckles while he shakes his head. “I should’ve known you’d pull some shit like this. You are a woman after all. Alright, whatever you want Dove. Ask and you shall receive.”
“Are you an only child?”
“No, I have two sisters. Lennox and Farrah. Lennox is ballsy as all hell and it scares the fuck out of me. I’m worried she’s gonna get killed one day. Farrah, well, Farrah is . . . she’s the bratty little princess of our family. I love her to death, and my father and I spoil her rotten.”
“It must be nice to have siblings. I’m an only child now. As a kid, I hated the age gap my sister and I had but now . . . I think it’s better. It gave me insight to everything, really. What about your parents?”
“My dad’s name is Bow, and he us
ed to be a Reaper years ago. He left the MC to be with my mom. After that they got jobs working with my Aunt Betti, who opened up a bail bondsmen company. My dad always liked kickin’ people’s asses, so the job suited him. Bet he never expected mom to get into the business.”
“I bet your parents are thrilled you came back to your father’s roots.”
“Dad is, in a sense. Don’t know how Mom would feel.”
“Hmm?”
“She was killed on the job. Trusted a fugitive who was looking for an out, and she was shot. She was left for dead in a field, died by her damn self and . . . fuck, just . . .” I’m now the one squeezing Mouser’s hand, trying to offer him some comfort.
“I apologize. If I had known I wouldn’t have asked about something so heart wrenching.”
“Nah, don’t do that. It’s alright. You have to learn shit about me anyway, right? In six weeks we’ll be getting married and—”
“What?!”
Mouser bursts into laughter.
“I don’t like it when you try to joke with me like that. It’s not funny.”
“On my end it is. You looked like you were having a stroke, Dove.” He barely gets the words out before he cracks up again.
I’m left here shaking my head at his shenanigans while a waitress brings our food up to our table. I’ve never been so thankful to see food in my life. Maybe it’ll distract Mouser for a bit and he’ll give me a break on the teasing.
Chapter Eleven
It’s your road and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you
~ Rumi
Mouser
“Mouser, I need you to go on a run with Cobra.” Damon tells me while he approaches where I’m sitting on the couch in the clubhouse. I peek behind him and see Sakura is over in the far corner chatting with Ivy and even his wife, Kat. For some reason I didn’t think Sakura and Kat got along, but obviously I’m mistaken.
Mouser (Reapers MC Book 9) Page 5