by Kat Brookes
He’d not missed Lainie watching them with a look of longing that he understood. She wanted her son to be the same way with her. He had offered to give Lucas riding lessons while Autumn took Lainie around to look at houses. He wanted to have another man-to-man, or in their case, man-to-boy, with Lucas, something he had done in small doses since Lainie had agreed to allow him to assist her. He just prayed he would be able to help.
“Can I ride a really big horse?”
He looked to Lucas, who was all smiles that morning and couldn’t help but think about the differences between him and Blue. At least, the way Blue had been when she first came to Bent Creek. His niece hadn’t wanted anything to do with horses. But she had her reasons and had, with Tucker’s gentle coaxing, worked through her fears. “Someday,” he told him with a smile. “But for now we need to start with a more size-appropriate mount for you. I think Tumbleweed would be the perfect training horse for you.”
“Tumbleweed?”
“He belongs to Tucker,” Jackson told him. “My brother bought him for Autumn. He’s a Palomino, which means he has a gold coat and white tail and mane. Used to belong to one of Tucker’s old rodeo buddies, who used him for roping competitions. He’s a little older, but well broke and good-natured.”
“He’s a rodeo horse?” Lucas repeated excitedly.
Jackson nodded. “He’s seen his fair share of competitions.” He reached for the barn door and drew it open. “You’ll learn to ride in here to start with.”
“In the arena?” he asked, having seen the small indoor training area when Jackson had first given him a tour of the main barn on his parents’ property.
“Best place to get your feet wet.” The expression on Lucas’s face reminded Jackson of Blue’s right before she questioned something that had been said. It was hard to remember kids tended to take things literally. “That means getting started on something new,” he explained as he closed the barn door behind them.
“I know that,” Lucas replied with an eye roll. “I’m not a baby.”
Jackson chuckled. “No, Lucas, you’re not.”
They made their way into the barn, where Jackson introduced Lucas to Tumbleweed and then showed him the proper way to saddle a horse.
“Can I ride now?” Lucas asked with obvious impatience.
“One more thing,” Jackson told him and then walked over to grab Blue’s safety helmet from its hook on the wall. “You need to wear this.” He settled the protective headwear atop Lucas’s head and then moved to secure the chin strap.
Lucas scrunched his face. “But it’s pink.”
“So is bubblegum and cotton candy–flavored yogurt and you probably like both of them.” His words gave Lainie’s son a moment’s thought, so he added, “We’ll get you another helmet to use when you come over to ride, but for now it’s this one or I can’t let you up on that horse. Safety is key.” Not to mention he would never forgive himself if something bad happened to Lainie’s son when he was in Jackson’s care.
Lucas debated for only a moment before replying, “I can’t ride without it?”
“Nope.” It wasn’t up for debate.
“But you and your brothers ride your horses without helmets...” Lucas pressed.
“We’re grown men with a lot of years’ experience riding horses. You’ve never even sat in a saddle. Big difference.”
Lainie’s son glanced toward the awaiting horse and then lifted his chin with the same determined tilt he’d seen Lainie do so many times. “Fine.”
Jackson secured the horse’s reins to a railing while he went to get the wooden mounting block Tucker had built for Blue. He placed it next to Tumbleweed and instructed Lucas on how to get himself up into the saddle.
Lucas managed to seat himself first try.
“A natural,” Jackson acknowledged with a nod. “Just like your mom.”
The boy’s expression tightened. “I’m not like her,” he countered. “I’m like my dad.”
Jackson reached down to set the block aside and then unwound the reins from the wooden rail. “I’m sure you are,” he said as he led the horse away from the indoor arena’s fence. “But you have a lot of your mother in you. I know because I’ve known her all my life. I see a lot of her in you. In your determination. In your smile. And, I have a feeling, in your horsemanship. Now let’s see what you can do.”
Lucas listened to Jackson’s instruction as he led the horse around the dirt-packed floor of the riding arena.
Like he’d said, the boy was a natural. “Once I’m certain you’re comfortable in the saddle, I’ll put Tumbleweed on a lead rope and let you take a little more control of the ride.”
“Today?” he said excitedly.
Jackson shook his head. “Not today. A few more lessons first.”
Surprisingly, Lucas didn’t put up any argument. He just remained focused in the saddle, taking in everything Jackson had to tell him. They made countless laps around the arena before Jackson announced that they were done for the day.
“Can we do this again tomorrow?”
“I think your grandma and grandpa are coming to visit you and your mom tomorrow,” Jackson reminded him as he led the horse over to the arena gate.
“And you,” Lucas prompted with a boyish smile.
“I won’t be there,” Jackson told him. Lainie had informed him of her parents’ impending visit, telling him there was no need for him to come by to check on them. He intended to respect her wishes where her family was concerned, as much as he enjoyed spending time with her and Lucas. “I have ranch duties to see to tomorrow.” He secured the horse and then placed the mounting steps next to it. “Now hold on to that saddle horn and swing your right leg slowly over Tumbleweed’s backside. Then ease down the left side until you feel the block under your boot.”
Lucas followed his instructions to a tee.
“That’s it,” Jackson praised with a nod. “Now slip your other foot free of the stirrup and then step down slowly.”
“How’s come we have to do everything slow?”
“Tumbleweed’s a pretty easygoing horse, but a sudden movement, especially from a rider he’s not familiar with, could cause him to sidestep unexpectedly and knock you over. Even throw a rider if he or she was still in the saddle,” he explained.
“Is that how you hurt your leg?”
The boy’s question took Jackson aback for a brief moment. Most people tended to avoid pointing out his physical disability. Although, as he’d learned with Blue, children tended to speak their mind, despite the discomfort their doing so sometimes caused others. His lips pressed together at the reminder of his ever-present limp. Sometimes he forgot he even had one, having lived with it for so many years. Only the onset of bad weather, which made his leg ache, drew his focus to it. Well, that and Lainie’s return. Her being back, spending time with him, made Jackson wonder what she thought about whenever she saw his uneven gait. While she’d done her best to hide it, he’d caught her on more than one occasion studying his jean-clad leg. Her expression was not one of pity, but something Jackson hadn’t been able to read.
Reaching for the portable steps, he set them aside and then unwound Tumbleweed’s reins. “It happened from a fall, but not from a horse,” he said as he led the horse out of the arena and back to its stall, Lucas walking alongside him. He signaled for Lucas to wait outside the stall as he led Tumbleweed inside. “I was thrown from a bull during a rodeo and managed to end up under its hooves,” he explained as he stepped around the horse’s neck to remove its saddle.
“Bulls are big,” Lucas exclaimed as he watched from the stall’s entrance. “I’ve seen them on TV when Mom watches rodeos.”
Jackson’s head snapped up, his gaze zeroing in on Lainie’s son. “Your mom watches rodeos?”
“Only when your horses are at them,” he clarified with a toothy grin. “She says the Tripl
e W has the best rodeo stock around. But I think she likes the part afterward when they talk to people who are a part of the rodeo. We saw you on there once and she got so excited.”
“She did?”
Lucas nodded. “And then she got kind of quiet. Like she was sad. Maybe because she didn’t want the rodeo to be over. She doesn’t watch anything else.”
Lainie followed the televised rodeos? No, only the rodeos at which the Triple W had stock. “It’s possible,” Jackson muttered, his thoughts on what Lucas had just told him. He had a feeling that seeing him on television had been the reason for her mood change, no doubt reminding her of the heartache he’d caused her. It ate at him that his actions so many years before had affected Lainie so deeply when all he’d wanted was the best for her.
“Riding lesson over?”
They both turned to see Tucker striding toward the stall. “For today,” Jackson answered as he lifted the saddle from Tumbleweed’s back.
“Sorry I missed seeing this young cowboy in the saddle,” his brother said, looking to Lucas. “How’d it go?”
“He’s a natural,” Jackson said, smiling as Lainie’s son drew back his shoulders and lifted his chin.
“It was fun,” Lucas said.
“Glad you enjoyed yourself,” Tucker told him and then looked to Jackson. “I just got off the phone with Kade. He’s good to go for the Wilmont Rodeo. He said for us to shoot him over the contract and he’ll sign on.”
Jackson nodded. “I’ll do that this evening after I get back from taking Lucas and Lainie home.”
“Sounds good. I’ll let you two finish up here,” Tucker said. “Mom wants me to take a look at the chicken coop door. It blew shut on her the other day and latched, locking her inside. Thankfully, Dad was sitting on the front porch drinking a cup of coffee. Otherwise, she might have been in there for a good while.”
“No kidding,” Jackson agreed, considering he’d been spending a great deal of time over at Justin’s place. “Let me know if you need a hand.”
“I will.”
“Who’s Kade?” Lucas asked when Tucker had gone.
“He’s our business partner. He lives in Oklahoma on a cattle ranch where he raises bulls for the rodeo. We contract together. We bring the rodeo horses and he brings the bulls.” They were supposed to be talking about Lucas’s relationship with Lainie, not about him. How had they gotten so sidetracked? Jackson stepped from the stall, closing the gate behind him.
“Were you ever scared of getting up on a bull?”
“Every time I climbed onto one,” Jackson admitted. “A rodeo cowboy would be in the wrong profession if he weren’t a little afraid. And that’s nothing to be ashamed of. Fear just means you have a healthy respect for what the animal is capable of.”
“Maybe I’ll ride bulls when I grow up.”
Lord, he hoped not. If anything happened to Lucas, Lainie would never forgive him, even if he’d done nothing to encourage him. Truth was, he never would. Lucas was too precious to Lainie and Jackson knew firsthand what could happen with one bad ride. He lived with the reminder of it every day of his life.
“There are a lot of things you can become,” Jackson told him. “I wouldn’t set your mind on anything yet. You might find you’ll want to be something else when you grow up. Like a doctor, or a teacher, maybe even a clown in a circus.”
Lucas burst into laughter. “A clown?”
Jackson grinned and reach out to playfully pinch the tip of Lucas’s nose. “One with a big red honker.”
The boy giggled and shook his head, then lifted his gaze to Jackson’s face. “I think I’d rather grow up to be a cowboy just like you.”
Warmth spread through Jackson’s heart. “Maybe you will, kiddo. Maybe you will.”
* * *
“Well,” Autumn said with a smile as she settled in behind the wheel of her car, “what did you really think about this place?”
Lainie glanced out the window toward the house she and Autumn had just walked through. “It’s nice.”
“So you told the listing Realtor who was holding this open house. I’m not so sure I buy that. Not when you’ve said the same thing about the other two houses we saw this morning.”
She looked to Autumn, unsure of what to say. “I’m sorry to keep you away from your little one when I don’t seem to be in the house-buying mood today.”
“First of all, as much as I love being a mother, it’s nice to have a little time away,” Autumn told her. “And Emma is more than happy to watch her grandson while I’m out showing you houses. Blue, on the other hand, is practically attached to her daddy’s hip. You can pretty much bet she went over to her grandparents’ place today with the intention of shadowing her daddy everywhere he goes. So there’s no hurry.” She smiled reflectively, before adding, “To be honest, it feels good to get back into the swing of things again. I hired on a couple of part-time real estate agents when I neared the end of my pregnancy, so I could focus on my family and bringing my son safely into the world. And while I don’t intend to go back to work full-time, I have been itching to get back at it. So thank you for giving me a reason to do so.”
“You’re welcome,” Lainie said with a smile. “I was beginning to feel like I was wasting your time this afternoon.”
“Lainie,” Autumn said, shifting slightly in the driver’s seat to face her, “you do realize that you don’t have to like every house I show you. You don’t even have to pretend to. If it’s not for you, it’s not for you. I wanna find what you want. Not settle for anything less. But you need to be honest about what you do and don’t like. Otherwise, I’ll keep showing you places that are just ‘nice.’”
As for finding what she wanted, she had wanted Jackson. That hadn’t turned out so well. And while she honestly didn’t feel as though she had settled for less in marrying Will—if anything she had been blessed to have him in her life—it hadn’t been the life she had once envisioned for her future. Just as the houses they had seen hadn’t been her idea of the sort of homes she pictured herself raising Lucas in. But her marriage had also taught her not to look past something that might be a good fit for her because she was searching for something else. However, this particular house was not the one. Neither were the two others. She felt that in her heart.
“Honesty, huh?” she repeated.
“I’m from Texas,” Autumn said with a grin, as if her deep Southern twang hadn’t already given her away. “I promise you I can take it.”
Lainie laughed softly. “Okay. The houses we’ve seen so far have all been very nice. But they’re not what I envisioned Lucas and I living in when we decided to move back here. They’re all so—” she searched for the right word, finally settling for “—contemporary?”
“That’s good to know,” Jackson’s sister-in-law said with a nod. “I just figured you were used to a more modernized home, having moved back from such a large city and all.”
“The condo we had in California was definitely modern, but I’m a country girl at heart,” Lainie confessed.
“Country girl,” Autumn repeated as she withdrew a notepad from her purse and jotted it down. Then she glanced up at Lainie. “Go on. Because something tells me there’s more you’re actually looking for than the three-bedroom, two-bath, single-level house with a yard that you specified.”
“I prefer a house that’s close to town. One with a large porch that stretches across the front of it, maybe even wraps around it, where I’d be able to sit out in the evening and watch the sun settle behind the mountains, dappling everything around it in spectacular shades of red and gold. I’ve always wanted a cedar-sided house, but it’s not a deal-killer if it’s not. I would like there to be a barn we could keep two or three horses in.”
That caught Autumn’s attention. “You ride?”
“I used to. Although it’s been a while,” she admitted. “I’m sure you
already know that my brother and Jackson were best friends growing up, still are actually, and we grew up on ranches that bordered each other.”
Autumn nodded her reply.
“We were always out riding together when we were younger. Although I was only with them because Mom told Justin he couldn’t go without me. That’s how I got so good at riding. They would try to race off without me. But I was lighter, and my horse, much to their chagrin, was faster, and I would end up passing them both.” She couldn’t help but smile at the fond memory.
Autumn laughed. “Typical boys. And good for you for showing them what you were made of.”
She’d always loved riding, but she’d only learned to do it as well as she did to make Jackson take notice of her, which he had, always praising her riding skills. “Justin doesn’t ride much anymore,” she said, changing the subject. “He spends most of his time inside his patrol car or in his office, working.”
“Sounds like Hannah’s friend Jessica. She’s a neonatal nurse at the local hospital who takes on extra shifts to support herself and her son, Dustin.”
“I take it she’s a single mother.”
“Yes.”
“Who watches her son while she’s at work?” That was something Lainie had been blessed not to have to worry about. She hadn’t worked since before having Lucas and hadn’t needed to since Will’s passing. Her husband had left them financially secure, but then that was the kind of man he was. Always thinking ahead, putting his family’s needs before his own.
“She had been living with her mother, who would look after Jessica’s son when she worked, but she passed away unexpectedly a few months ago.”
“Oh no. I’m sorry to hear that.”