No answer.
I heard his voice when I rounded the corner past the kitchen, making my way down the hall.
Of course, he’s on the phone.
I hung my hands on my hips, pausing in the hallway to debate my options. I decided to just get a glass of sweet tea and wait for him to get off the phone so he could help me load up the car. I was in no hurry, anyway.
But before I could turn back toward the kitchen, I heard my name.
“Yes, it’s been hectic being out here, but Ruby Grace has been great about it all. The crew filmed our dinner earlier this week, and she looked ravishing. She’s everything I could have ever asked for in a wife.”
I smiled, a mixture of guilt and love swirling in my stomach as I leaned my back against the wall, folding my hands over my heart. It was rude to listen in, and I knew it, but truth be told, I needed to hear that kind of thing from Anthony.
I needed to hear what I meant to him.
“I know, Dad. Yeah. Right. Ha! I know, you should have seen us at the barrel tasting event. I swear, this town lives and dies by that distillery.”
I smiled. That was Stratford, alright.
“Oh, trust me, I can handle her father. With what we’re doing for him, I don’t think he could even pretend to not love me — even if that were the case,” Anthony said, lowering his voice.
My stomach somersaulted, and I slid my back quietly along the wall, getting closer.
“It’s not the only reason, Dad,” he said after a long pause. “No. I know. I understand. Listen, being a politician is all I needed to do in his eyes. We golf, shoot the shit, gamble at the casino, talk about how the extremists are taking the country to hell in a hand basket. He dragged me to the casino last week.” A pause. “I know. You think he would have learned after that, but… anyway. Her mom is a little tougher, but I play the perfect gentleman and she eats it up. Just have to open a few doors and call her ma’am and she lights up like a Christmas tree.”
A pause.
An exaggerated sigh from Anthony.
“Dad, trust me, I get it. I know they’re not exactly what we had in mind for the perfect in-laws. They’re country bumpkins, but, they’re in the political circuit — even if it’s in a small way. This is what you wanted, right? The Barnett name is known in this town, and when we did the background check on Ruby Grace, we didn’t find a single thing that could come up and bite us in the ass during the elections. She’s clean. She’s poised. She has no aspirations of her own.” He paused again. “And, she’s pretty, which is a bonus.”
Another chuckle.
Another roll of my stomach.
“Her mom has trained her well to be the perfect politician’s wife,” he continued. “Her family isn’t exactly the premier picture we had in mind, but they’re pretty clean cut. They’re reputable. And they need us to play our part, just like we need Ruby Grace to play hers.”
I bit my lip against the tears stinging my eyes, confusion rolling over me and mixing with the betrayal. I didn’t understand it — any of it. He loved me. He loved my family.
What part was he playing in our life?
What part was I supposed to play in his?
This can’t be Anthony. He wouldn’t talk about me like this. It’s all a misunderstanding.
I tried to convince myself, fighting against the urge to hyperventilate as I pressed myself against the cold wall in our hallway.
But I couldn’t lie to myself, not when I was hearing everything I needed to hear to know the truth.
“This was always our plan, Dad,” Anthony said. “She’s perfect.”
A pause.
“I know,” Anthony said. “The way I see it, Ruby Grace will be more than happy to take on the community projects. It’ll be a good look for the campaign. And, hey.” He lowered his voice even more. “Having her tied up in all of that will leave me plenty of free time for a little fun on the side… know what I mean?”
He full-on laughed at that, and even from where I stood in the hallway, I could hear the gusto laugh of his father.
His father, who had kissed the back of my hand when we met and told me how beautiful I was, how smart I was, how lucky Anthony was to have me.
And it was all a show.
It was all a lie.
They need us to play our part, and we need Ruby Grace to play hers.
A sob broke through my throat before I felt it coming, and I clamped my hand over my mouth, squeezing my eyes shut to force the tears back in.
“I gotta go, Dad, I think she’s downstairs.” A chuckle. “Okay, I’ll call you later to discuss the speech.”
I needed to move. I needed to get away from Dad’s office, from Anthony, from this house and this entire town. But I couldn’t move. The hardwood floor was quicksand, sucking me in, making it impossible to take even one step.
Anthony rounded out of the office on a sigh, running one hand back through his hair before he paused, eyes lighting up at the sight of me. “Ah, there’s my beautiful wife-to-be. I was just coming to check on you.” He smiled, pulling the shell-shocked board of my body into him and pressing a kiss to my forehead. “Need help with anything?”
I couldn’t speak.
I just stared at him, at his hazel eyes — the ones I’d lost myself in for hours over the last year — at his perfect blond hair, his perfectly sculpted body, his perfect Superman chin.
And here I was, his perfect little abiding bride-to-be.
Anthony frowned, searching my face. “Baby? Are you okay?”
My stomach rolled violently at the nickname, and I blinked several times, awareness flooding back. “I’m fine. I just almost fell trying to get the boxes with the centerpiece stuff downstairs. Could you help me with them?”
Anthony smiled, thumbing my chin before he kissed my nose. “Of course, my little do-it-all-by-herself. You should have just asked me in the first place.”
I faked the best smile I could, snaking my way out of his hold. “One of them is on the stairs. There are three more in my room. Can you load them into the car for me? I’m feeling a little lightheaded, think I need some water.”
Anthony swept my hair away from my face, still wearing that stupid, sympathetic smile. “Of course. You go hydrate and rest. I’ll be back.”
He walked me to the kitchen, pouring me a glass of water before he disappeared up the stairs to retrieve the first box. As soon as he was gone, I took my first inhale, gulping down the entire glass of water before refilling it.
My mind was spinning, heart racing, rib cage closing in on my lungs. Every second that passed, my hands shook more, and the tears I’d managed to hold back flooded my eyes over and over before I’d blink and clear them away.
“All set,” Anthony said, bounding back into the kitchen.
I didn’t realize how much time had passed. Everything felt like a dream.
“Want me to come help? I can take a break from work. It is Saturday, after all.”
“No,” I said quickly.
Anthony frowned.
I swallowed, shaking my head and forcing another smile as I placed my hands on his chest. I wanted to beat my fists on it, scream at him, cry and kick him out and throw the ring on my finger in his face.
But even in my frantic state, I knew that wasn’t the right thing to do.
I needed time. I needed space. I needed to think, to process, to figure out what to do.
Who to trust.
“Sorry,” I said, still smiling. “I just, I haven’t had much time with Annie since I got home, what with her being pregnant and me doing all the wedding stuff. I need some girl time.”
Anthony returned my smile in understanding. “Of course. Well, you two don’t get into too much trouble, okay?”
My smile was shaky, but I held it as long as I could, closing my eyes against the urge to vomit when Anthony leaned in for a kiss. I turned my head, offering him my cheek, and he kissed it sweetly before pulling back, still framing me in his arms.
“See
you later this evening?”
I nodded. “Mm-hmm.”
As soon as his hands were off me, I swiped my purse off the kitchen counter, bolting for the door. I practically sprinted across the drive to my car, hands shaking as I pulled the handle and climbed inside. The engine roared to life when I pushed the ignition button, and I threw it into reverse, kicking up gravel with my tires as I flipped it around and sped off down the old dirt road.
My heart kicked hard in my chest, picking up more and more speed with every inch I put between Anthony and myself. My eyes flooded with tears, ones I couldn’t hold back any longer. They slid down my cheeks, hot and searing, my hands tight on the steering wheel, stomach lodged somewhere in my throat.
Halfway down the road to the Main Street drag, I pulled over, trying to calm my breaths before I had an all-out panic attack.
I needed to breathe. I needed an explanation. I needed someone to hold me and tell me it was all going to be okay.
I needed Noah.
The thought hit me as quickly and as unsuspectedly as everything else had that day, but it didn’t make me panic more. If anything, the realization soothed me, blanketing me like a silky sheet of reassurance.
My heart rate slowed.
My breathing evened out.
My hands stabilized, the tears on my cheeks drying, no more falling from my eyes to join them.
For a long time, I just sat there with my hands on the steering wheel, staring at the swirling dust from the road between me and Main Street.
Then, I fished my cell phone out of my purse and texted Annie.
Mom sprung something on me, we’ll have to reschedule our super fun centerpiece building day. See you at church tomorrow.
As soon as the text went through, I turned my phone off, put the car in drive, and floored it across town.
Noah
“Just a minute!” I called from the bathroom, cursing under my breath as I ended my shower prematurely and yanked a towel off the rack. I’d debated ignoring the knock at my door altogether — mostly because I was pretty sure it was someone trying to sell something or convince me to switch religions. But, there was a chance it was one of my brothers, or my mom, since all of them liked to stop by unannounced.
The knock came again, a little louder this time, as I swiped a pair of sweatpants from my bed.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming! Hold your horses.”
I grumbled, putting on the first white t-shirt I saw hanging in my closet, even though I was still a little damp. As soon as I was dressed, I stormed across my house to answer the door, frustration boiling even more when yet another knock came. I frowned, blowing out a hot breath and ready to let whoever it was on the other side have it — unless it was Mom, of course.
When I swung the door open and saw Ruby Grace standing on my front porch, all the frustration died.
And was immediately replaced by the most powerful sense of protectiveness I’d ever experienced in my life.
Her fiery red hair was tied in a messy bun for the first time since I’d met her, little tendrils falling from the hair tie and framing her long, worn face. Her eyes were puffy and red, mascara smudged beneath them, bottom lip trembling as she watched me.
She looked so small — her arms folded over her middle, shoulders slumped, head hanging.
Someone had hurt her.
I swallowed, fists tightening at my sides, before I slowly pushed open the screen door between us. I didn’t chance a single word when she stepped inside, and as soon as she was in my house, I shut both doors behind her, folding my arms over her like I could protect her from whatever or whoever had hurt her.
Ruby Grace melted into me, a little sob muffled by my t-shirt as she buried her face in my chest and twisted her hands in the fabric covering my abdomen. She pulled me closer, trying to fold in on herself as I surrounded her, hugging her tight, one hand finding the back of her head. I ran my fingers through her hair, pressed her closer to my chest, my lips finding the crown of her head as I forced a calming breath.
“It’s okay,” I assured her without knowing what it even was. “I’m here. I’m right here.”
She cried harder at that, pulling at my shirt again like she needed me closer. There wasn’t an inch of us that wasn’t touching, but I tried, anyway. I tightened my grip, pulled long, calming breaths through my nose before gently releasing them, helping her to do the same.
It felt like hours that we stood there, just inside my front door, her wrapped up in my arms as I rocked her. With each passing minute, her sobs softened, her breathing quieted, and finally, she pressed her hands into my chest, lifting her head from that spot to lock her eyes on mine.
Her devastated, tear-glossed, achingly beautiful golden eyes.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her bottom lip trembling with the apology. “I… I didn’t know where else to go.”
I ran the pad of my thumbs over her cheeks, wiping away the salty streams there before I framed her face in my hands. “You never have to apologize for coming to me. Ever. No matter what.”
She closed her eyes, releasing two more parallel tears before she buried her head in my chest again.
I had so many questions — namely, who the fuck did I need to kill — but, I knew she’d tell me what happened when she was ready. So, instead, I held her, walking her over to my couch and pulling her down into the cushions with me. She curled up in a ball in my lap, and I covered us with a blanket, rocking her gently in my arms until her breathing quieted again.
“Do you want some water?” I asked after a while.
She nodded, sniffing and running the back of her wrist under her nose before crawling off me. I squeezed her knee before I stood, making my way into the kitchen.
Once I was alone, I cracked my neck, forcing a calming breath that was more for me than for her. I had the bad habit of jumping to conclusions, of letting my temper get the best of me, and I knew it was going to take every ounce of willpower I had to be calm and cool and collected when she finally did tell me what happened.
If it was Anthony, if he had cheated on her or broken her heart in any way, I also knew that “staying calm” would be a nearly impossible goal to accomplish.
With two glasses of water in hand, I made my way back to the living room. Ruby Grace hadn’t moved an inch. Her eyes were blank, bottomless holes as she stared at my coffee table.
“Here,” I whispered, handing one glass to her and setting the other on the table. She wrapped her hands around the glass, taking one small sip before resting it in her lap, her eyes focused on the liquid inside.
“Anthony doesn’t love me.”
She whispered the words, and not a single shadow of emotion passed over her face when she released them.
I didn’t know how to respond. Half of me wanted to say I fucking know that, I’ve been trying to tell you. But, the other half of me knew there was a reason she thought he did before this moment, and there was a reason she thought he didn’t now.
“That’s not true,” I finally offered, against the internal rolling of my eyes.
“No,” she said, shaking her head. “It is. I heard him…”
I frowned, not understanding.
She closed her eyes, forcing a long breath before she spoke again. “He was talking to his dad on the phone, he didn’t know I could hear him. And he… he said some awful things about me, about my family.”
My throat tightened, and I reached for the other glass of water, taking a sip to cool myself down before I spoke. “What did he say?”
“That I was right for their plan. That I was pretty and I don’t have any aspirations of my own and I’ve been trained well to be a politician’s wife.” She scoffed, eyes floating up to the ceiling as she rolled her lips together. “He doesn’t want to marry me because he loves me, he wants to marry me because I fit the role.” Her eyes fluttered shut again. “I’m a pawn in a game I didn’t even know I was playing.”
“He didn’t say that.”
Rub
y Grace’s eyebrows bent together in confusion, her gaze leveling with mine. “What?”
My jaw clenched along with my fists at my side. “Please, tell me he didn’t say any of that. Tell me, so I don’t get in my truck and drive across town and beat in his fucking face until no one recognizes him.”
“Noah,” she gasped, reaching out for me. “Please, don’t. Don’t hurt him.” She swallowed. “Don’t leave me.”
The breath I blew out through my nose felt like fire and smoke, black invading my vision. That son of a bitch didn’t deserve her in the first place, and now?
Now, he didn’t deserve to breathe.
“Please,” she said again, scooting closer to me. She placed her water on the coffee table, leaning into me, her small arms wrapping around my middle as she rested her head on my chest. “Please.”
I blew out another breath, but this time, I let it out slower, wrapping my arms around her in return. There was nothing I wanted more than to drive across town and give that motherfucker exactly what he had coming.
Nothing, except to hold Ruby Grace and be the one who made her feel better, the one who showed her that what he did to her did not define who she was.
“I feel so stupid,” she said after a while, her head still on my chest. “All this time, I thought I’d hit the jackpot. I had the perfect guy, the perfect ring, the perfect future. I didn’t mind sacrificing my own dreams for his, because I knew he loved me. I knew that I’d be his partner, standing by his side, and he’d bend for my wants in the future.” She paused. “I thought I’d found what my parents had. And that was all I’d ever wanted.”
My heart broke with that admission, because I knew the feeling all too well. Ruby Grace had watched her parents grow in love just as I’d watched mine, and it was what we had pictured for our futures.
Now, her picture had been shattered.
I tilted her chin up, leveling my eyes with hers. “He’s an idiot,” I stated simply. “And I know that doesn’t fix anything. It probably doesn’t make you feel better, either. But, he is. And he’s going to regret the day he lost you. He’s going to regret that he didn’t realize what he had when he had it.”
On the Rocks Page 18