by Ryan, Kaylee
“It is!” she screams. “Why now, Cooper? Huh? Why all of a sudden do you want me? You say you’re in love with me? What changed?”
“I changed.” I take one step closer to her and stop. “I changed because I learned what life was like without you in it. It fucking sucks, Reese. I hate it. I think about you every fucking second of every day, and it’s not because you’re my best friend. It’s because you’re my fucking soul.” My hands fly out of my pockets as I smack my chest. ‘Right fucking here.” I tap my heart. “That’s where you live, and frankly, I can’t live without you. I don’t want to. I’m miserable.”
“You’re miserable?” She scoffs. “I threw myself at you, and you turned me away. You didn’t want me. I was trying to move on. I was supposed to be married to a good man who would always want me, and now this?” She waves her hands around the room. “I’m here in my fucking wedding dress fighting with you.”
“I don’t want to fight with anyone else.” My voice is low, but her eyes soften just a little, as does her posture at my words. I take another step toward her. “I’m in love with you, Reese. Not because you’ve been my best friend since I was eight years old. Not because I don’t want anyone else to have you. Although that’s true. You’re mine. I love you because of the way my heart races at just hearing your name.” I take another step toward her. “I love your smile and your laugh. I love the way that no matter where you are in a room, I can feel you.” I take one final step that leaves me toe to toe with her. Placing my index finger under her chin, I tilt her head up so we’re eye to eye. “I love you for this.” Reaching out, I grab her hand and place it over my racing heart. “I love that you are in here. You live inside of me, Reese. I never want that to change. Ever. I want to spend the rest of my life showing you how much I love you.”
“Coop,” she cries, as big fat tears run unchecked down her face.
“Don’t cry, baby. I’m right here.” I wrap my arms around her, pulling her to my chest. Sobs rack her body as she clings to me. I hate that she’s hurting and I’m the cause of that pain, but at the same time, I’m so fucking grateful she’s here in my arms, and I have the chance to love her like she deserves to be loved. “I love you, Reese,” I whisper, pressing my lips to the top of her head.
Her sobs turn to sniffles and eventually quiet, and she lifts her head from my chest to look at me. Green eyes filled with sadness, love, confusion, and worry stare back at me. I want to ease her fears, and the only way I can do that is to show her. Sliding one hand behind her neck, I bend, pressing my lips to hers. Just a feather-soft touch to gauge the moment.
“Coop,” she breathes, and suddenly there’s something else in those beautiful eyes of hers.
Desire.
My hands settle on her waist as I bring her body flush with mine. She moans, and I have to taste her. This time I take what I want. I push my tongue past her lips and explore her mouth. My hands roam up and down her back, tracing her spine. She whimpers, and all bets are off. I need her naked.
Now.
Pulling back, I move us to the bed. She stands still as she watches me rip off my suit jacket and toss it on the floor. I remove my shirt from my dress pants and fumble with the button, and then the zipper as I tug them over my hips, letting them pool around my ankles. I kick off my shoes, and then my pants, as I rip open my shirt. Buttons ping off the walls as they fly across the room, but I couldn’t care less. I get to the neck and realize I’m still wearing my tie. With deft fingers, I work the knots and slide it over my head, dragging my shirt off and tossing it to the floor as well.
I’m standing before her in nothing but my boxer briefs, which do nothing to hide the fact that my cock is hard and aching for her. “I love you.” My voice is strong and doesn’t waver. I watch her closely, and her breathing accelerates at my confession. “I need you out of this fucking dress,” I growl. It kills me to see her in the dress she bought to wear for him. “Turn around, baby.”
She does as I ask. Kissing the back of her neck, I start with the zipper. As wedding dresses go, this one is simple. White, silk, and landing just above her ankles. There is no flair, or princess qualities—something I always thought of when I thought of Reese in a wedding gown. Over the past couple of months, since I got the invitation, I’ve imagined it quite often, and every time I was the man waiting for her at the altar.
Me.
I need her out of this one. The dress she bought to wear for him. With trembling hands, I give the zipper a tug, and nothing happens. I try again and still nothing. With a heavy sigh, I rest my forehead against her shoulder.
“Coop,” she says, reaching her arms behind her and grabbing my cock. “I need you.” There’s a tremor in her voice, a need I must cater to.
Only me.
Her words send fire coursing through my veins. She needs me, and that’s more than I could ever ask for. I want to be that man for her. The one she can lean on, and the one who fuels her desires. The one who gives her everything she needs, in the bedroom and in life.
Fuck it.
Lifting my head, I grip either side of the dress by the zipper and tug. The silk fabric tears. Reese gasps, the sound echoing throughout the room. With the fabric still gripped tightly in my fists, I pull until the dress falls from her body. Underneath, I find my Reese wearing a white lace thong and matching bra. It’s as if she’s a gift, not just to me but to my heart, and my cock, one we can’t wait to unwrap.
“I don’t know where to start,” I murmur, raking my eyes over her body. She makes the decision for me when she slides her fingers into the waistband of her thong. She shimmies her hips, and the tiny piece of fabric slides to the floor. When she reaches behind her back to unclasp her bra, I place my hands over hers, stopping her. “Let me.” My voice is low and husky. I’ve thought about this moment a thousand times. Finally, after years of hiding and denying my attraction to her, we’ve come to this.
“Cooper,” she whispers.
I lean in and kiss the back of her neck, my lips trailing over to her bare shoulder. I want my lips on every inch of her skin. I want to trace every curve. I want to memorize her. Then, I want to do it all again. Over and over again, every fucking day for the rest of my life.
Unsnapping her bra, I slide the straps over her shoulders. I watch as she removes each arm and tosses the white lace to the floor. I don’t bother to look where it lands. No, my eyes are glued to her smooth, silky skin. When I reach out with my index finger between her breasts, she shivers. “You cold, baby?” I ask, my voice thick.
She turns to face me. Her eyes, although still red from her tears, are filled with longing.
“I lo—” I start to tell her again, but she rises on the balls of her feet and presses her lips to mine. I can feel the tremble in her hands as she presses them to my bare chest.
The time for talking is done. Time to show her how much I love her.
Chapter 2
Reese
I’m an entangled mess of emotions. I’m supposed to be celebrating my nuptials with Hunter, the man I was engaged to just hours earlier, yet here I am, in a hotel room with my best friend. My best friend who decided the day before my wedding to tell me he’s in love with me. I don’t know if I believe him. I know Cooper, and he’s always been protective of me. He’s never thought that anyone was good enough for me, and I have a strong suspicion that’s what this is about.
Regardless, his confession of love made me think. In fact, thinking is all I was able to do all last night, and throughout the day. I came to the conclusion that I didn’t want to marry Hunter. He’s a great guy, but he was safe. When Cooper pushed me away, I was broken, and Hunter was sweet, and never pressured me. Hell, he had his own beliefs. We respected one another, but I don’t love him. Not like I should.
I just walked out on my wedding, and I’m more torn up about the fact that Cooper is here telling me he loves me. I’m upset because I want more than anything for his words to be true, but I just can’t trust them. He’s broken my heart in the past. I
kept that from him. The pain, the agony he caused. I never let the pain show. That’s my mistake, my issue, and I need to be honest with him, and I will be.
However, for once, I’m being selfish. I want him. I want to know what it feels like to have his body pressing into mine. I want to know what it feels like to be a part of him. For us to be one together. I’ve fantasized about him for years, and I’m giving in to temptation. He’s here, and he’s willing. I’m here, and this is all I’ve ever wanted. I know there is so much we need to discuss. There is still so much I need to figure out. I need time to process all of this.
After tonight.
Tonight, for the first time in my life, I’m taking what I want. What my heart really wants. And that’s Cooper. I know it’s wrong, but I can’t seem to find it in me to care. My life has been flipped upside down in the last twenty-four hours. I’ve always wanted him, and even though he’s here under the guise that our lives are now entwined, I know better. However, I’m still taking this moment. I’ll need it to carry me through the heartbreak and the tears once he realizes he was wrong. That he was just jealous of my time with Hunter, the time he was no longer getting.
This time, I’m not going to hide the hurt. I’m not going to sugarcoat it to spare his feelings. I need to put me first, and that includes being honest with how he broke me. I don’t know what we will be after tonight. I don’t know if I’m tossing away years of friendship for one night of being consumed by him, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take. After this moment, after his confession of love, things have already changed. I know they’ll never be the same.
I’m taking what I can get.
Cooper pulls out of the kiss, and we’re both panting as we try and catch our breath. He smiles down at me, tucking my hair behind my ear. He’s being sweet and affectionate, which is how I always imagined this moment would go. The only problem is, if I let this night continue down that path, my heart will never recover. The odds are against me as it is. My heart is so entwined with him that I know the scars of the past will always remain.
“You’re beautiful,” he says softly. His brown eyes are hooded as he takes in my naked body.
I’d love to stand here and let him tell me all the sweet things he thinks he needs to say, but again, I know my heart and know I can’t take it. Placing my hands flat on his chest, I allow them to roam over the peaks and valleys he calls abs. Not able to handle the intensity of his stare, I allow my eyes to follow the path of my hands until I reach the waistband of his boxer briefs. His hard cock is peeking out the top. Gently, I trace the tip with my thumb, causing him to groan. With one hand held tightly to my hip, the other slides behind my neck as he leans down and presses his forehead to mine.
“Reese,” he croaks. “Baby, as much as I love you touching me, we can’t go there. Not right now. This can’t be over before it starts.”
Ignoring his words, I drop to my knees, pulling his boxer briefs down with me.
“Fuck,” he mutters.
Wrapping my hand around him, I stroke him a couple of times, causing his legs to shake. I know he’s about to stop me, so I lean in and take him into my mouth.
“Motherfucker,” he pants. His hands bury in my hair, and I take as much of him as I can. He’s long and thick, which makes it more difficult. When I pull back to get a better angle, he steps back. “No more,” he rasps. “Not this time.”
Glancing up at him, I see his chest rapidly rising and falling, the intensity of his breathing matching my own. I watch in fascination as he grips his hard length and tugs, much harder and faster than I was just moments before. “Get on the bed, Reese.” It’s not a request. It’s a command.
A thrill races through me. Finally. After years of imagining being with him like this, it’s going to happen. I push the possible consequences of my actions to the back of my mind. I want this. I want him, and now is the time. It’s time to live in the moment and make up for the regrets of my past. I should have been more assertive that night. I should have told him what I wanted, but I shied away with his rejection.
I don’t want to be that girl. I don’t want to settle. Not anymore. Not this time.
“I wanted to take my time with you,” he says, staring down at me. My eyes dart to where he strokes himself hard and fast. “Fuck, I can’t do it. Not with you looking at me like that. Next time.” There is promise in his voice. “On the bed, Reese.”
I do as he says and climb onto the bed. Resting my head back against the pillow with my arms at my sides, I fight the urge to reach for the cover to pull it over me, but when his heated gaze captures mine, the thought disappears. I like the way he’s looking at me. His stare is intense and causes me to shiver with anticipation.
Cooper releases his hard cock and bends to retrieve his pants. I watch with rapt attention as he shuffles for his wallet. When he finds it, he drops his pants to the floor as he searches and searches, coming up empty. “Fuck.” He runs his hands through his hair, dropping his wallet to the floor, and looks up at me. I see the apology all over his face. “I don’t have a condom.”
“Seriously?” I ask. I would have thought that would be a staple for a man like him, you know, being a sexy professional athlete. I know women throw themselves at him. I’ve watched it happen for years. I can only imagine that’s increased tenfold with his position on the Indianapolis Defenders.
“You think I planned this?” he asks, the hurt evident in his voice. “Reese, I was coming here to watch the love of my life marry another man. Getting laid was the last thing on my mind.”
His words cause my heart to skip a beat. “Are you clean?”
“Of course I am.” He scoffs as if me asking offended him.
“How long has it been?” I don’t really think I want to know the answer to this question, but for us to move forward, I need to know.
“A long fucking time,” he murmurs.
“How long is a long fucking time?” I ask. I’m sure our ideas of long are different.
He blows out a breath, closes his eyes, and looks to the ceiling. His hands move to his hips, and his hard cock stands tall and proud against the ridges of his abs. “Eyes up here,” he says when he catches me ogling him.
“How long, Cooper?” I ask, not an ounce of shame for staring. This is my night, and it’s my last with him, so I’m getting the full experience.
“High school,” he mutters.
What did he just say? No way I heard him right. I open my mouth to ask him to repeat it, but his words stop me. “Senior prom, Reese. I never knew if someone was interested in me or my career, and then when I left, all I could think about was you.”
“Me?” I croak. I’m floored by his words. I would never have believed it had I not heard it straight from his mouth. I know Cooper, and I know he’s telling me the truth. How is it possible that it’s been that long for him?
“Yes, you.” His brown eyes soften. “You are the love of my life, Reese. I’m sorry it took me this long to tell you. That it took me this long to admit it to myself. I’ll never make that mistake again. I promise you that.” He pauses. “Are you on the pill?” he asks, swallowing hard.
“Yes, but just the last month or so.”
“Oh.”
“I’m clean too.”
He nods. He thinks he understands, but he has no idea. “Okay.” He nods, accepting my reply as my truth.
“Cooper.” He’s staring at the floor until his eyes pop to mine. “I didn’t sleep with Hunter.”
“What?” he asks, his eyebrows furrowed. “I don’t understand. How is that even possible?”
“It’s been since high school for me as well. Prom, senior year.” It sounds crazy even to me that neither of us have expanded our sexual experience since we were seniors in high school. He says it was me, and I know my lack of experience is because all I wanted was him.
“It should have been me,” he says with both sadness and conviction in his voice. “I wish with everything in me that I would have seen what I had ri
ght in front of me. It should have only ever been me.” His voice drips with sincerity.
There is so much that just passed between us, so much information provided in just a matter of minutes, that I can’t process it right now. I don’t even want to try. I want him. He wants me. That’s what matters in this moment. “I’m clean, and we’re protected.”
“You sure about this, baby?” His question is softly spoken, but the underlying need in his voice is evident.
“Have you changed your mind?”
“No.” He’s quick to answer. “Never.”
“Then show me.”
His eyes heat, and I know my words are what he needed to hear. In the blink of an eye, he’s lying on the bed next to me. His large calloused hand cups one breast, then the other. “The thought of being inside you, it’s intimidating as fuck, but what’s more is the thought of being inside of you bare. I know I’m not going to last.”
“You don’t know that,” I whisper as his hand roams over my belly and slides between my thighs.
“I do know that. I was worried before, making love to you, the woman I love, for the first time, but this, knowing I get to feel all of you, all of this,” he says, sliding a finger inside me, “It’s more than I can handle. I know that.”
“So you don’t want me?” I ask, and no matter how hard I try to hide the hurt, it’s there, sounding loud and clear in my voice.
“I’ll always want you, Reese. Don’t ever question that. I know I pushed you away, but that’s not going to happen ever again.” He lazily pumps his finger inside me. “I’ll always want you, and I’ll always love you. There’s nothing in this world that will ever change that.”
“So where does that leave us?” I ask, arching my back as he slides another digit inside me.
“That leaves me horny as fuck and dripping with need.” He presses his hips into my thigh, and I can feel the precum on the tip of his cock on my leg. “That means I have to get you off because there are no promises the first time I feel you.”