Judith leaned away from the ball as it flew by her face. “Please come with me,” she said.
Mat slid off Helen’s desk and followed Judith out the door without betraying a hint of embarrassment. Ivan Strong, the security guard who had allowed Mat up, emerged from an elevator, looking pale, with Malcolm P. Wade, head of Security, by his side. Mat greeted both men cheerfully. They followed Judith into an elevator headed up.
Ava had to fight the urge to follow them. If she could have it her way, she’d be inside Judith’s office—no, inside Mat’s brain—trying to control the exchange.
But she had no choice but to continue with her morning normally. She watched as Jaime helped Helen reassemble the items on her desk, her face red. And when Ava took her place next to Jaime at that morning’s Engineering meeting, Helen appeared shaken. Her voice was pinched, and she kept knocking things off her desk. Ava tried to maintain her focus as the group discussed their projects, but she couldn’t. She imagined Judith peeling her orange across from Mat. Mat would be smiling at her, gesturing theatrically. Maybe he would even stand to deliver an impassioned speech. He might apologize for his methods, chalk it up to his commitment to STÄDA’s mission—
“Ava?” Helen’s voice was suddenly pulling at her attention.
“Sorry,” Ava said.
“Well?”
“Can you repeat the question?”
“What are you working on this week?” Helen said. She wore a pained expression and tapped a blunt pencil against her desk.
“I . . .” Ava started. “I’m working on ladders.”
“Ladders?”
“Cat . . . um, cat ladders. Sisal cat ladders. It’s an alternative to a traditional scratching post or tower. The idea is that it leans up against the side of a sofa to deter the cat from the sofa itself. It’s collapsible and can be easily stowed. I believe we’ll be calling the prototype the Devious Ladder.”
As the conversation moved around the circle, Jaime turned to Ava. “Did STÄDA really ask him back?” he whispered. “I’m not buying it—when has that ever happened? Judith said she didn’t know anything about it.”
Ava shrugged, annoyed by his doubt, struggling to find the right answer. She pretended to be fascinated by her colleagues’ projects. She wanted a perfect Mat-ism, something that could explain away his strange maneuver to make it feel like basic arithmetic.
“So no!” Jaime said excitedly, once they had all disbanded. “Is he a lunatic? I wonder how long he’s been in the city! I mean, I can’t believe—”
Before he could continue, a chorus of phones pinged and vibrated across the floor with an email to the entire New York office from Judith.
Dear STÄDA NY,
In light of recent events, we will be conducting a mandatory People training at 10:30 a.m. in the Imagination Room.
Best,
Judith Ball
Chief People Officer
Green
Ava checked her Precise Wristwatch. Ten-thirty was in ten minutes. Her phone chimed again with a second email from Judith:
Dear STÄDA NY,
Today was Ivan Strong’s last day.
Best,
Judith Ball
Chief People Officer
Green
Ivan Strong, the security guard who had let Mat in. Ava’s stomach dropped. This was the email STÄDA sent when someone was fired. She had to admit that she admired the beauty of its construction. The subject of the sentence was the day, not the person. The word fired—or any of its euphemisms—was absent. She opened S-Chat and scrolled, looking for Ivan Strong’s name. It had vanished.
The Imagination Room was soon overflowing with STÄDA employees from all departments. Judith stood beside the projector screen, which read Appropriate Behavior and Workplace Security. Once the room was at capacity, she began to move through her slides. The presentation involved a series of multiple-choice questions.
A termination contract is:
Just a formality
Temporary
Legal and binding
If a former employee wants to return to work at STÄDA, that employee should:
Apply for an open position online
Apply for an open position in person
Disparage the replacement’s performance
Guests you bring to STÄDA should be:
Spontaneous
Romantic partners
Fully vetted and approved by STÄDA Security
Ava sank low in her Encouraging Desk Chair, took out her phone, and texted Mat.
Are you okay? Are you still here?
No.
What happened in there? she wrote. Where are you?
Can we just talk when you’re home, Lamby? I really need space to be the CEO of my own story right now. I’ll see you after work.
Ava fit her phone back into her pocket. She couldn’t shake the worry that Mat was upset with her. She played the morning’s events back to herself throughout the day, trying to locate her misstep.
* * *
When she did return home that evening, Ava found Mat in her Embracing Armchair, facing the wall. The room was humid and had an earthy, dank smell.
“Mat?” She didn’t realize until she said his name that she was nervous.
He turned to face her, and she saw then that he was wearing a VR headset and holding a video game controller. Its thick black strap wrapped around his head, and the front eyepiece looked like a thick sleep mask. It completely blocked his peripheral vision. He pulled the headset off. “Hey, Lamby,” he said.
“Hi,” Ava said, sitting beside him. “I’ve been thinking about you all day.”
She held his face in her hands and kissed him. The straps of his VR set had imprinted their shape onto the sides of his head. He returned the gesture with a deep hug, nestling his face into her neck. She rubbed his back and kissed him on the cheek. “I’m sorry about today. We can talk about it if you want to. Or not. Whatever you want.”
He groaned. “I’m just so embarrassed. What was I thinking?”
Ava wasn’t sure what he had been thinking, but she wanted to make him feel better. “You were optimistic, and that’s a big part of why I love you.”
“Really?” he said, looking up at her. His mood lifted at the compliment.
“Yes, really,” Ava said, placing a hand on his cheek. “You’re going to figure it out. You’re a Good Guy, remember? You can stay here while you get settled. I’m sure all the headhunters in New York City are salivating over your availability right now.”
“Thanks, Lamby,” he said softly.
They lingered in the embrace for a moment. Ava relaxed against his body. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of his One shampoo, whose subway advertisements directed consumers to a long online personality questionnaire that produced their ideal shampoo formula.
“I’m going to make something to eat,” she said.
“Then do you mind if I . . .” Mat said, gesturing toward his VR headset. It was a rhetorical question. He picked it up and clicked quickly through settings on the controller.
Ava began assembling dinner, and when she reemerged to ask Mat if he wanted anything to eat, he was slumped on her Practical Sofa, staring into the void of his headset like a catatonic insect.
She could hear the muffled sound of gunfire as he threw an invisible grenade. She ate her lentil soup and watched, trying to pick up any clues as to what was unfolding within the world of the game. She felt sorry for him.
“Fuck.”
He said it so flatly that Ava wondered whether any serotonin remained in his central nervous system.
“I died.”
36
“You have to admit,” Jaime said, stepping into the elevator after Ava the next day, “that yesterday’s little opera was pretty entertaining. I mean, the hubris!” He pressed the round number 2 and hung his amber-tinted glasses on his shirt pocket as they descended.
Ava bristled. “I don’t know, I feel for
him,” she said. “I mean, the poor guy . . .”
The elevator dinged and opened. “Poor guy?” Jaime said, stepping out. “Ava, please. What is he even doing back in New York, do you think?”
“He probably came back to haunt you in particular,” Ava said. She looked around the Test Floor, which was buzzing with activity. On the south side of the room, a team of engineers assembled a Sleepy Rocking Chair. On the north side, a crew tightened bolts on an Effusive Bathroom Vanity. A third group appeared to be working on an Obliging Step Stool. Ava was comforted by the coordinated bustle.
They found a Sturdy Table by the window, and she began assembling the Devious Ladder. Jaime collected pine rungs and hardware from the well-organized wall of bins, then laid the pieces onto the table for her. “Seriously, though,” he said, turning a rung over in his hand, “why do you think he’s here?”
“I think he quit his job in Gambier. Can you hand me a hex key?”
“He told you that? You’ve talked to him since he’s been back?”
“Briefly,” Ava said.
“So he’s here just . . . because?” Jaime said, handing her the tool.
“I don’t know exactly,” Ava said. She tightened the bolt at the end of a rung. She was irritated. “I guess it was really lonely there. He missed me, and I—”
“Oh god, don’t say it,” Jaime said. “Please don’t say it. I was worried about this, but I refused to believe it.” He looked at her.
“I missed him,” Ava said, avoiding his pointed eye contact, reaching for another rung. “I did. I’m happy he’s back. I mean, do I think it was crazy for him to try to get his job back like that? Yes.”
“Why?” Jaime said. He put down his pencil and looked up at her.
“Why what?” She swapped the hex key for a screwdriver.
“Why would you think that’s crazy? It’s completely predictable. He’s a special combination of inept and entitled. A total scammer.”
“He’s not a scammer,” Ava said.
“Seems like he scammed his way right back into your relationship,” Jaime said. “It’s a confidence game. He waltzed back into STÄDA as if he’d already gotten his job back, and he waltzed back into your relationship as if you’d never broken up with him. What’s he even up to right now? He’s just staying at your place with no job? Is he going to pay rent, or is his only contribution his charm? Can you imagine what Andie would think of that arrangement?”
Ava looked up at him. “I don’t know why you’re so concerned. He’s been back for three seconds. He’s allowed to ease back into a job. I would have sent him away if I’d wanted to. I missed him. Why is that so hard to understand?”
“Look,” Jaime said, lowering his voice. “It’s none of my business. But come on—you started to focus on yourself as soon as he left. You’ve been going on all these promising dates. You’re finally getting closure from the accident. You seem . . . good. Like your old self, I mean.”
“My old self? My old self from when?”
“From . . . I don’t know. Before.”
“You mean the time in between when Andie got killed and when I met Mat? That really special time in my life, when I got so much good work done because I was desperate to avoid my own life?” Ava’s face burned. “And so what if his main contribution to my life is his charm? He is charming, and sweet, and he makes me laugh. He’s not Andie, but I think I can forgive him for that. Can you? Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve been with anyone?”
“I’m sorry,” Jaime said. He looked alarmed. “That’s not what I meant.”
“And my dates weren’t promising, they were depressing. You were just invested in me being with anybody but Mat. Just please take your seven-million-dollar UV-filtering organic GMO sunglasses and leave,” Ava said. “I don’t want you here right now.”
“Will I see you for lunch?”
Ava didn’t answer.
“So that’s how it’s going to be? Mat’s back and now you’ll disappear for another few months while I’m left to spy on teenagers?”
“I’m canceling lunch because you’re being insufferable. Why can’t you trust that I know what’s best for me? Not everything is a conspiracy!”
“Because Mat is bad news! There’s just something about him that isn’t right,” Jaime said. Other engineers around the room had paused their work to watch the argument. “I know it,” Jaime whispered, “and you knew it back then too, before he clouded your vision. If you don’t trust me enough to believe me, I’ll prove it to you.”
Ava was livid. “It kills you so much to be supportive that you have to make a crusade of tearing him down. If there’s a scam, what is it?”
“I don’t know. It sort of feels like his existence is a scam. And his authority is definitely a scam. What has he done for STÄDA aside from redecorate?”
“Plenty! What about the ‘Yes, And’ meetings?”
“Anyone who took an improv class at summer camp could have come up with that, Ava!”
“Is it really that hard for you to see me happy? I’m tired of defending myself. In your mind, Andie is the only person good enough for me. And you know what? I have been trying so hard not to agree. But I’m finally happy, so get on board or leave.”
He did leave, and Ava jammed together the pieces to the Devious Ladder alone. First came the outrage: How dare Jaime judge her life choices, when all she was doing was cutting out a small space for her own happiness? But then came the doubt: Was it true? Had Mat scammed her into taking him back? Her mind wandered to her studio, where she’d left him asleep, his face so serene and pure she’d felt guilty kissing him awake. Do you mind if I take your car to work? she had said. No, no, of course, take it Lamby, he murmured. Keys are on the counter.
She messaged her SHRNK. Do you think Mat actually loves me? Or is he using me? She stared at her phone, suddenly desperate for the reassurance. The ellipses appeared.
Ava, who could you be if you believed you were worthy of love?
She pulled the Devious Ladder apart, finished making edits to the manual, and used a full unit to jam it back together one more time. Her phone buzzed, and she reached into her back pocket. Her heart jumped at Mat’s name.
Dinner plans tonight?
I thought I’d defrost some veggie burgers.
Hmm. No, he wrote.
No?
Allow me to handle.
She began to respond when she saw that he was typing, so she stopped.
Oh, and Ava?
Yes?
Sorry I didn’t really ask before. Can I be your live-in boyfriend? For now? You can say no!
Okay: No.
Wait. Really?
No! Not really!
She set down her phone and looked out the window onto the shipping warehouse. The same crew of workers that had been there for months continued its mesmerizing ritual: lifting the Very Nice Boxes from the back of a truck, into the warehouse, onto a conveyor belt, out the back, into a new truck. Boyfriend! The word had briefly and intensely awakened Ava to the possibilities of the world around her. She had the impulse to go outside and observe the workers up close. Mat responded with a blushing, smiling emoji, which she stared at happily.
She drove home in his car—her live-in boyfriend’s car. She rolled the phrase around in her mouth as she navigated home. She liked it. The coupe was fun to drive, in a perverse way. She let herself briefly imagine him at the door, greeting her, Brutus winding between his legs, his tail thwacking against the wall. But then it was Jaime’s voice again: A total scammer! She waited at a red light and let herself imagine what the scam could be. Remote controllers, a dirty stovetop, an unmade bed, glasses on every surface dyeing rings into the wood. She felt overheated at the thought of it.
As she made her way up the stairs, her heartbeat climbed into her throat. With each flight the smell of bacon and—what was it? Something deeply familiar, deeply calming—intensified. When she opened the door to her apartment, the incredible smell of dinner confron
ted her fully. Her Appealing Dining Table was set with two Enduring Candles burning serenely in their Enduring Candle Holders. Brutus was sleeping in his Dreamy Dog Bed, clearly worn out from a day of exercise. Mat wore Ava’s Homey Apron and tossed a steaming bowl of what she realized was spaghetti carbonara, made with—according to the ingredients on the counter—aged Parmesan and pancetta from the butcher and eggs from organic, free-range hens.
Just like her dad had made when she was a kid.
“Mat,” she said. She couldn’t keep the emotion out of her voice.
“What?” he said, fighting back a smile.
“You made . . . it’s my favorite.”
“I know,” he said, tucking his hair back. “It made me happy to make it. I love you, Lamby.” He pulled out an Appealing Dining Chair for her and she sat, accepting the chivalry, the Thoughtful Glass of water he was now pouring her, then his warm kiss on her cheek.
37
Mat Putnam is a Vandal.
Ava stared at the subject line of an email Jaime sent her the next morning. She read it again, allowing the irritation to set in fully. Was Jaime so desperate to badmouth Mat that he’d accuse him of vandalism even after he had left the company?
She opened the email and saw that Judith had been CC’d.
Ava and Judith,
New information has emerged about the Vision Tower blueprint prank from several months ago. I think we should meet.
Yours,
Jaime
Ava couldn’t even pretend to drum up concern. Mat had been with her that day, sneaking around in the printer room. Her body tightened at the memory of his hand pressed against her. An S-Chat message from Judith disrupted the memory.
Jaime, Ava, please come to my office.
Ava watched, annoyed, as Jaime stood from his desk, fit his laptop into a floral sleeve, and made his way directly to the elevators. She sighed, waiting for the doors to close behind him before making her way to the elevator bank.
The Very Nice Box Page 22