He stopped walking and groaned. Oh, he was such a dope. Did he have to fly hundreds of miles away, stumbling through the wilderness, to discover something that could have been apparent when he’d been with her?
Protecting her was only part of the puzzle. He cherished her, cared for her—and—he swallowed before admitting it—he loved her.
Love. How could something so simple mean so much?
He glanced up, seeking the skies opening to him amid the breaks in the foliage. Should he go to her and offer her the truth? If he hadn’t trusted her with his secrets, how could he expect her to confide in him? Relationships were a partnership, a two-way street.
He had to take the risk—tell her the truth and offer her his heart. If she rejected him again, well, what did he have to lose? He had nothing out here, no one.
The loss couldn’t feel any worse than he did out here alone, without her.
* * *
One more night until the full moon. Time for Rachel’s monthly ritual.
She headed to Vamps. Upon entering the club, the sensory overload with flashing lights in the darkness and intense music drowned her. So different from the last time she’d been there with Mattias. Without him, it lacked sensuality. The gargoyle statues glared down at her. The gothic vibe that fit everyone else reminded her that she was different. She didn’t fit here any more than she did as a professor at the university.
Untouchable. Unlovable. Dangerous.
She stepped up to the bar and found an empty stool. Might as well have her liquid courage before the night ahead.
“Hey Rachel,” the bartender said.
She glanced up in surprise. It was one of Mattias’s brothers. Even if she hadn’t met him, she would have recognized the family resemblance in his features and tall, muscular physique.
“Hi.”
“Lucan.” He placed his hand on his chest.
“Lucan,” she repeated, grateful for the reminder.
She wasn’t typically bad with names, but it had been almost a month since she’d met him. That meant it was almost a month since she’d started seeing Mattias. A wistful sigh rose, but she suppressed it before it escaped her lips.
What a whirlwind of an affair. It had risen so quickly, yet couldn’t last from one moon to the next. Odd, how their time together seemed much longer in a way, as well. Perhaps, it was due to how close they had grown during that time.
Or, as close as two people could get with one having a big, bad secret.
“What can I get you?” Lucan asked.
She glanced at the drink menu. When she spotted one called Howl at the Moon, she smiled to herself. If only he knew. It had a mixture of rum and fruit juices, nothing too off-putting, like tequila.
“I’ll have a Howl at the Moon, please.”
“Good choice. I put it together as a special for the Supermoon tomorrow night. It’s supposed to be spectacular.”
Not for her. Would a Supermoon mean its effect on her would be more intense?
When Lucan grinned, it reminded her of Mattias. An ache churned in her gut. She glanced out to the dance floor. Couples danced without a care in the world as usual. She’d once had that freedom out there with Mattias. That time was over. He was gone.
Would he ever return?
“Have you heard from your brother?” she asked.
Lucan poured rum into a glass. “If you mean Danton, yes. I can’t get a break from him. He’s right over there.” He winked and then pointed at a man with long blond hair towering at the edge of the floor who stood a head and then some over most of the people near him. “I assume you mean Mattias.”
She turned back to him. “Yes, Mattias.”
While he poured pineapple juice into the glass, the easygoing smile that was on his face slipped. “No. He needed space, so we gave it to him.”
A stab of guilt twisted her gut. “I’m afraid I’m to blame.”
Lucan stirred her drink and then pulled his gaze up to meet her eyes. “I don’t know about what happened with the two of you, but he’d been having a hard time.”
“How?”
“It’s not up to me to share, but it started before he met you.”
Her pulse quickened and she drummed her fingers on the smooth, polished bar. What was it that could be bothering him? The yearning to be close to him rolled through her like the slow caress of a wave as it reached the shore.
Lucan handed her the drink. “You look like you’re feeling guilty. You shouldn’t. Wherever he is, that’s where he needs to be. Clear his head and figure out what he wants, you know what I mean?”
She rubbed her temple. “I do.” She took a sip of the drink while she thought. Whatever was going on with Mattias went deeper than her hang-ups. Did he have some demons of his own?
Lucan watched her. She probably had her thoughts splashed across her face.
“It’s excellent.” She pointed at the glass.
“Thanks.”
She leaned back on the stool. “I should call him.”
Lucan groaned. “That might be tough. I found his phone in my trash bin, destroyed.”
Shit. How else could she reach him? “If you hear from him, would you tell him that I’m sorry. And, that I’d like to explain?”
“Of course.”
She pulled out her money to pay, but he refused to take it. “It’s on me tonight.”
She peered at him. “Thanks, but why?” Essentially a stranger, why would he pick up her bill?
“Because you made my brother happy. I could see it in his face, see the difference from that sullen persona he’d adopted.”
And, she’d also made him ache, as viciously as she’d done to herself. She resisted the urge to cringe.
“And, I hope you get the chance to do so again.” Lucan grinned, winked, and moved down the bar to tend to another customer.
Rachel sipped her drink and watched the crowd. A few people looked familiar. A few more songs played, each with a different tempo that entranced the crowd. She glanced at the phone three times. Darla was late. Where in the hell was she?
A man stepped beside her at the bar. “You’re back.”
Shit. It was that guy, Alex, who’d followed her out the night she’d met Mattias.
She pursed her lips. “I’m meeting someone.” Her tone came out frosty as intended.
“Can I buy you a drink while you wait?”
“No thanks, I’m good.” She hoped her curt tone would discourage him. If not, she’d have to spell out her disinterest in chatting with a guy who followed her from a club. Well, unless that guy was Mattias. Still, he had a better reason—he’d been watching out for her.
Her phone buzzed. A text message from Darla appeared.
Sorry, I can’t bring it to you tonight.
Rachel’s pulse quickened. Why not?
An accident with the potion. I don’t know what happened. Maybe with the Supermoon tomorrow, it threw things off.
Rachel’s heart thundered. Alex peered at her phone. How rude. Who read a stranger’s personal messages?
“Excuse me,” she snapped. She turned away, shielding her phone so he couldn’t read it. Did it break?
It bubbled up and broke the vial, smashing onto the sidewalk. I’m headed back home to start a new batch, but it won’t be ready for tonight.
Her skin heated and turned clammy. Anxiety over the upcoming Supermoon bubbled like an experiment that had turned combustible.
Panic rose like bile in her throat as her worst fear visualized in her mind. But the full moon is tomorrow.
I know. Don’t worry. I’ll get it to you in time.
She drummed on the side of her phone. What if it explodes again?
I’ll make a few batches as backup, adjusting the efficacy of each.
Would that be sufficient? The Supermoon had already upended her precaution. Rachel stared at the glow of her screen as if it would beam a message reading, “It’s going to be okay.” Since it wouldn’t come no matter how she visualized
it, she chewed on her cheek and addressed the next practical step.
Where should we meet? Vamps won’t open until well after dark.
I’m staying at Viktor’s. I’ll work on it here. As soon as it’s ready, we can meet up.
I’ll come to you.
No. He doesn’t like visitors while the sun is up and he’s down. It unnerves him. I’ll meet you at the gazebo at the beach.
When?
By sundown. I’ll text you when it’s almost ready.
Rachel moaned, grateful that the surrounding music drowned it out. That was cutting it close. Too close. But, what other option did she have?
Can you get there any sooner? It was a frantic plea, and likely a futile request.
Not likely. Magic isn’t something to be rushed. I’ll be there. See you tomorrow.
Shit. Rachel pushed her glass forward and climbed off her stool. What the hell should she do? She had no reason to remain here.
Alex asked, “Is something wrong?”
The music shifted to a pounding bass that quickened, accentuating the ticking of time. Time she both dreaded to come and yearned for, eager for tomorrow night to pass.
“I’m leaving.”
“Why are you rushing off? I thought you were meeting someone.”
She ignored him, maneuvering her way to the exit. As she approached the door, Mattias’s brother with long blond hair stepped up to her.
“Is everything all right?” Danton asked.
No, it wasn’t. Was her distress so apparent to everyone? She could hardly explain the reason why.
“I’m fine,” she said, forcing a smile.
Danton glared at someone behind her. “Why are you bothering her?”
She turned and noted that Alex had followed her. Again. What the fuck?
“I’m not bothering her.” Alex stared up at Danton. “We were talking and something on her phone upset her. I’m making sure she’s okay.”
“I’ll see to that. You stay away from her.”
A glare match followed. Alex finally broke the stare, turned, and disappeared into the maelstrom of dark-clad bodies gyrating under flashing lights.
Danton kept his gaze pinned on the dance floor. “I’ll make sure he doesn’t follow you.”
“I didn’t know he was,” she admitted. How foolish of her. Distressed by the incident with the potion, she hadn’t been paying attention.
“That’s my job. Watching out for people here.” He studied her. “Can I get you a taxi?”
“I’ll be fine.” His concern touched her, reminding her of Mattias, as did the situation. Alex had followed her that night when Mattias had intervened. Would everything from now on make her think of him? Everyone? “I’m hoping to talk to Mattias. If you hear from him, please let him know.”
“Will do.” Danton gave her a solemn nod.
* * *
When twilight descended, Mattias flew east. A gentle summer night breeze caressed his wings. The moon glowed bright, close to being full. Tomorrow, when it would be, it would be even more magnificent. With the glorious orb shining bright, it would be the perfect moment to return home.
Home?
Odd, his homeland was France. Why would he think of the North Shore as home?
It was the ocean he missed. The salty tang filling his nostrils and coating his tongue as he soared above it. The sound of the waves rolling to the shore filled his ears like a comforting song.
Could it be because of Rachel?
He barked out an incredulous laugh. That was a ridiculous idea. She’d made her feelings clear by ending things. How could he possibly think there was something deeper connecting them?
He groaned. Because he sensed it. Some soul-deep connection that he’d never experienced before. It couldn’t be all in his head.
Although cloaked with gargoyle magic, Mattias kept to more remote locations as he flew, sticking to forests and fields. The serene wilderness appealed to him more than the light and smog and noise from the highways.
As he approached the state line between New York and Massachusetts, his wings grew weary. Although he yearned to power on, he needed to rest to restore enough energy for the remainder of the flight home.
Searching below for a suitable spot to land, he descended to a field near a stream, startling a deer. He could use water as refreshment. He shifted to stone form and remained there as the sun rose, restoring his energy.
The next morning, he scoured the meadows and forests for some fruit and nuts to fuel him for the long flight ahead. Once he ascended back to the air, his chest clenched with unexpected tightness. His connection to Rachel heightened. Something was wrong. She was distressed about something—something big.
He focused on their connection to read it better. Nothing came through.
What was wrong? Was there anything he could do to help?
He could only do so if she was open to seeing him again. That was quite a gamble, the biggest one in his life.
As he approached Caterina’s Cove, the familiar tang of the ocean infused him. He communicated to his brothers.
I’m coming back.
Good, Danton said.
We missed your ass around here, Lucan added. And we’re not the only ones.
What do you mean? Mattias asked.
Rachel came to Vamps last night, Danton said.
Mattias swallowed, not sure how to reply. Oh.
I don’t know what happened between you two, but I’m guessing something went wrong to explain your sudden departure, Danton added.
It did. How is she?
She asked if I’d heard from you, Lucan said. I told her no. She said if we did to pass on a message.
Mattias took a deep breath, preparing for the worst. What is it?
She’s sorry. She wants to talk to you and explain what happened.
Those words lifted Mattias higher than his wings could ever carry him. Did she say anything else?
That’s about the gist of it, Lucan replied.
A half hour later, she rushed for the door, looking quite upset. Danton added. I asked if she was okay. She muttered she was, although that was clearly not the case.
Mattias flapped his wings more quickly. I’m on the way back.
Chapter 18
Rachel hadn’t fallen asleep until close to dawn. She’d tossed and turned, restless with agitation. And when she’d finally drifted off, images of the coming night disturbed her. Fangs, claws, fur. A monster.
What if that monster was her?
After she woke mid-morning, she called Kelly. Her hand trembled as she held her phone and paced through her kitchen.
“Darla didn’t bring it last night.” Rachel explained the holdup with the potion.
“Do you think she’ll come through in time?” Kelly asked.
Rachel leaned her back against the counter and tapped her foot. “God, I hope so. We’re cutting it close.”
“And if she doesn’t?”
“Then, I’ll have to get to where I can’t hurt anyone quickly.”
“Where? Your basement or somewhere else?”
Rachel bit her lip as she stared outside. The sun shone onto her garden and filtered light inside the room, bathing her pothos, aloe, and jade plants in its warmth. Once it disappeared, replaced by the full moon, she’d be a threat to anything nearby. She could head deep into the woods, making it unlikely that she’d be able to reach anyone. It would take time to get there, and they were already cutting it close.
“The basement,” she replied. “Hopefully, I don’t destroy my house.”
Kelly said, “Don’t worry, everything is going to be okay.”
“God, I hope so.”
“I’ll be there tonight to carry on as usual.”
Rachel opened a locked drawer from her desk and pulled out an object from a hidden component. She stared at the metal of the gun gleaming in her hand.
“Kelly, will you do something for me?” Her voice sounded detached as she traced her finger over the smoot
h barrel.
“Of course. What?”
“Will you come with me to the beach? Just in case.”
“Of course.”
“There’s something else.”
“What?”
Rachel bit her lip before bringing it up. “I want you to bring the gun with you.”
She’d instructed Kelly to use it in the past if she needed to defend herself. Kelly had barely given it a glance, and said she’d never touch it. Tonight, she might need to.
“What’s going on, Rachel?” Kelly’s tone crept higher with wariness.
“Just in case.”
“Are you mad?”
“Sometimes I feel that way.” She’d bought it before she’d met Darla, during a dismal state. “I’m going to give it to you. If I become a threat to you or anyone else, you’ll need to stop me.”
“Rachel, no.” Kelly’s voice trembled. “Absolutely not.”
“You must. I can’t live with myself if I hurt anyone. And, if I endanger anyone else by spreading this disease…” Her voice drifted off. “What if I bit you?”
“You can’t ask me to shoot you! You’re my sister. I love you.”
“It’s not me when I’m like that. I don’t remember any of it. It’s like a demon inside me, possessing me.”
“I can’t kill my own sister!”
“Start with a bullet. See if it stops me. It’s better than me attacking someone else. What if I kill them?”
“You won’t. We’ll keep you locked down there. You can’t hurt anyone if you can’t reach them.”
“It’s merely a precaution.”
“This is awful. I can’t even...”
“It’s just a backup plan. You know me. I have plans and back up plans.”
TORCH: Underground Encounters 9 Page 13