I fix my scowl in place. “I ordered you to stay in the armory.”
Additional attitude washes over Ruth’s face. “The room shook and plaster fell on us. Were we supposed to stay in there and die because you ordered it? If the roof caved in, we would have been squished and our guts would have slid out and become one with the floor.”
Someone needs to curtail this child’s sappy reading material. I’ve had enough, and somehow, I need to make it clear I won’t be disobeyed. I look into her eyes, K-5 swirling inside me.
Ms. Beast explodes.
Ruth actually falls over backwards as I storm around the table. I hook a claw in the front of her tee and twist. It rips but it’s enough to pull her toward my fangs.
“My, what big teeth you have,” she sing-songs.
I see red.
My roar blasts through the room. The look on Che’s face stops me from throwing Ruth across the room. That’s when I realize I’m out of control.
“Return to your rooms. You will not leave until I give the word. If you disregard my order, you will be banned from the citadel.”
I storm from the armory feeling like an idiot for being unable to control my anger around children. I head to the infirmary. Shadow Warriors drop their gazes as I storm past. A few whisper Alpha in greeting, but I don’t stop.
I find Axel checking on the young woman I saved yesterday. He’s taking her blood pressure. She’s the only Federation soldier in the crowded infirmary. Maylin and Garret busily attend to the other Warriors and humans. “Where are the other prisoners?” I ask Axel, my loud voice turning heads.
The young woman, her brown hair a mess, cheeks too thin for her face, green eyes wide in terror, cringes back against the pillow. “Let me finish here and we can talk,” Axel says, using his testy voice. I turn away, march into his office, and slam the door. What the heck is happening to me? I wanted to bite his head off.
It takes Axel five minutes to join me and by then we’ve both calmed a bit. “Take the table. I’ll answer your questions while I remove the stitches.” I was pacing the room and now give the table an evil glare. So maybe I haven’t calmed down.
“Something is wrong with me,” I say and slam my butt onto the table.
There’s no surprise in his expression. “Start from the beginning?” he asks wearily. Under normal circumstances, I would be concerned for him, but I’m too upset right now.
I tell him about passing out the first time after going on the minisub and continue with what just happened with the kids.
He doesn’t speak until I’m finished. “You need a complete physical,” he suggests.
“Do it,” I say miserably. He’ll find nothing, but if I don’t agree, we can’t move on.
He smiles gently and pulls over a rolling tray with all his doctor crap on board. I give it the evil eye. “I hear you’ve been reading the women’s texts.” he says, trying to take my mind off his poking and prodding.
“They call them journals,” I huff on a sour note. “I’m reading my grandmother’s journal first, and I’m hoping it enlightens me.”
Axel rubs his chin. “I believe, and this is only speculation, but I think your Beasts are in a power struggle.”
I make a funny sound. “Pfft, Ms. Beast doesn’t have a chance.”
“You might think that but I’m unsure. How much do you control your Nova?”
I shrug. “I thought I was doing better but during the battle, the rage was too much, and I lost hold of her. This may just be how she works.”
“Do you try to control her when you’re in Nova form or just when getting there?”
I shake my head glumly and whisper, “Yes and no. I haven’t discovered the exact science of making her appear. I thought my Beast was coming out the other day and instead Nova appeared. It was different, though.” I shrug. All of this is enough to give me a headache, and I already have enough problems.
Axel checks my blood pressure, my reflexes, and my wounds. He removes the stitches, and I’m grateful Warriors heal quickly and I don’t need to feel their pull any longer.
He smiles and rolls his chair back a little when he’s finished. “You’ve been under a lot of stress. The doctor recommends you do whatever warlords do after battle and then head to your love nest with King. You both deserve a break. I’ll write a prescription if you think it will actually help you do it.”
It’s my turn to smile. “You think I’m a warlord?”
“I don’t know what else to call you. You’re a one-woman destruction machine, and the amount of information you absorbed this past year should have your brain exploding. You don’t give yourself enough credit. There will never be a perfect leader. Everyone makes mistakes, even you. It will happen, you’ll learn from them, and you’ll move on. You’re alpha and the only person who doubts you is you.”
If it were only that simple. “So a potentially exploding brain is your professional diagnosis?”
He groans in annoyance and allows me to pretend I didn’t hear his message. “That diagnosis is as good as any,” he finally responds. “When was your last period?”
The world stops.
“I don’t know,” I say in a small voice. My head spins.
He gives me a gown and leaves the room so I can change. I stare at the material in my hands then look down at my stomach.
Protect, whispers Ms. Beast.
Chapter Twenty-Three
King
Seven Warriors lost their lives. We have several humans in uncertain condition but so far none have died. I locate the wives of two of the men. They know their mates are dead, but I want them to understand as the wife of a Shadow Warrior, they will be cared for. The looks on their faces say it all. There is nothing comforting about death.
“Will it ever end?” I think to myself after leaving.
I don’t have answers. When we came to the island, our plan was to take over for a short time. The people put up little resistance. Starved and short on medical supplies, they needed us as much as we needed them. Once the world was settled, we would give the island back to its people. On days like today, I don’t see it happening.
Beck finds me as soon as I return to the citadel. “We have a problem at the shipyard, and Nokita is asking for you.”
Of course we have a problem at the shipyard. I change course.
The sun blazes down on us as Nokita explains what parts he needs for the submarine while I wonder what made this a crisis. He drones on and on, and it’s hard not to tap my foot impatiently.
He stops talking and looks down. “What is it?” I finally ask.
He glances up before turning his eyes away. “Maylin is pregnant.”
Interesting. “How old is Baby Boot?” I ask.
“Almost a year.”
I smile and try to lighten the mood. “You could have waited a little longer, but if Maylin is happy about it, I don’t see a problem.” Maylin does not have a “happy” reputation. It’s helped somewhat that she works for Axel in the infirmary and takes Baby Boot with her. Nokita knew Maylin’s personality when he took her as mate.
“She’s happy. I’m worried.”
I nod toward two benches along the dock and stomp over. “Tell papa what’s worrying you?” I ask with humor.
“Che’s on lockdown due to the stunt he pulled with Ruth. Baby Boot grows daily and requires more time than Maylin has, and we’re bringing a child into this messed-up world and adding to the chaos.” He looks up at me. “Do you ever wish we were still farmers?”
I hadn’t thought about my farm days in a long time. I grew up thinking I would push a plow just as my father had. Even with commercial farming taking over, my father owned a lot of land and our future was set. I never wanted to be a farmer.
“No,” I tell Nokita truthfully. “It was never my desire. Is it what you want?”
“I don’t want war.”
This startles me more than the pending baby announcement. We need Nokita as part of Marinah’s guard. I trust him,
but it doesn’t stop me from making an offer. “Would you like to take over Cabel’s old job?” After Cabel mated, the mating frenzy affected him strongly and he was transferred to agriculture. He’s back as one of Marinah’s guard now but he needed the time. Nokita’s transition to a mated pair wasn’t as violent though chances are good, he’s better at controlling his beast than Cabel.
Nokita scratches his head and looks out over the water. “I don’t know. I want my children raised in peace. They’re human and not as capable of surviving this world as we are. I don’t want what happened on our planet happening here. It’s what I fear most.”
I’ve never considered that it would be Shadow Warriors who would end this planet. I think of war and strategy as easily as I breathe. Not because I enjoy war but because it’s all that I’ve known for so long. Nokita’s revelation is something to ponder.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Marinah
I swear Axel to secrecy. He doesn’t like it, but he finally agrees. The fainting is caused by hormone fluctuation due to pregnancy. The hormones relax my blood vessels and too little blood flows to my brain. It’s a problem I can’t worry about now. Axel gives me vitamins and orders me to rest as much as possible. Unfortunately, I don’t have time to rest. I also need my child safe and the only way is to go after President Barnes.
I walk from the infirmary and see the female soldier I rescued. From the look on her face, she’s terrified. I stomp barefoot past Warriors and stop at the foot of the bed. Her hands shake. I’m no longer in Warrior form. It’s just me. I’m unsure what to say and I almost walk away. Her voice stops me.
“Thank you,” she whispers softly.
I grunt and leave the infirmary. The Federation is made up of red stripes—young, frightened soldiers who are given an order, and they follow it, having no idea if the side they’re on is right or wrong. They do what they are trained to do. For hundreds of years we’ve asked this of our children. It needs to stop.
I run into Labyrinth on the second floor. “Notify the guard. Meeting in one hour.”
“Yes, Alpha,” he says and quickly changes direction.
It’s me. When I don’t think about it, I have no problem dishing out orders. I literally think too much. Seven dead. In the scope of war, this is a low casualty count. My heart says differently. Seven. Their death is on me and I must live with it.
My hand goes to my belly. I’ve never been a mother. For the strangest reason, I’m not terrified. The principles of war work for raising a child too. You plan, do the best you can, and pray. I take a deep breath and square my shoulders. It’s time to grow up.
∞∞∞
During meditation, before the meeting begins, I look inside myself. Ms. Beast is restless. I search for Nova and see the shadow. It’s disconcerting that I can’t clearly make out Nova’s form. The knowledge must be in my grandmother’s journal. I need answers.
With quiet determination, I search for our child. Going inside myself isn’t pushing organs apart so you can see around them. It’s more like a foggy place in my mind. When Ms. Beast lets her presence be known, I usually feel it in my gut first. I see her in a third-dimension type way. She’s there, but I can’t physically touch her. I don’t know what I would do if I searched and she wasn’t there. She’s too big a part of me now.
With my attention, she looks up and growls. The shadow slowly changes shape. It wraps around a small bundle that moves inside the shadow.
This isn’t Nova. It never was. This is the child King and I made. Ms. Beast has been guarding the baby. Warmth settles inside me and I open my eyes. The men have their heads down.
“We need to send a team after President Barnes now while the Federation won’t expect it.” Eyes snap open and the men turn to me.
“He’s our target. The tunnels they blew up were a decoy. They had a way out, and my guess is they had a full underground city to operate from.”
“We know about the tunnels,” declares Beck.
“Years ago, there were rumors that the Federation had a place for key players if things went south. The Federation’s army is a moving target, but I don’t think their strategists move with them. They use low-key players for their attacks, even on the outposts. Since Smythe died, someone else has been running the show, and I doubt it’s Barnes. We need answers.” My gaze goes to King who’s sitting quietly. His lips tip into a small grin. Something warm settles inside me. He’ll have my back and if a decision isn’t a wise one, he’ll be the first to point it out. That’s what mates do. I push my self-doubt to the background. A mother doesn’t have that luxury.
“How many men?” asks Cabel.
“Four of us—Labyrinth, Alden, and King. I’m the fourth.” Beck’s fist strikes the table and Ms. Beast rumbles. I give him my alpha stare, ignoring Ms. Beast’s sudden interest and King’s Beast energy which shot up at Beck’s tantrum. He doesn’t need to approve of my decision, but he will follow orders. “You, Cabel, and Nokita are mated and will remain on the island. If we don’t return, you will take over as Alpha with Nokita and Cabel as your seconds. Too many people depend on us. We must have a contingency plan, and this is it.” I haven’t discussed this with King, but the warmth in his eyes says he agrees.
Beck rises from his chair, his eyes filled with fury even though he won’t look directly at me. “I will return shortly,” he grinds out.
“Sit down,” I order in my deeper Nova voice that I didn’t know I could call at will. “Save your sulking for later. We need you here.”
Air leaves Beck’s lungs and his fists squeeze in and out. He takes another deep breath and looks at King. “I wouldn’t have let you go without me. Bring her back to the island alive. The last thing I want is to rule. If you get yourself killed—” He turns my way. “Don’t expect me to start meetings with meditation.”
The sudden spike of K-5 drops. I glance at Nokita, giving him a chance to argue. His head dips in acceptance, and Cabel does the same. Our plan is to get in, get out. The more men we bring, the higher our chance of failure. I had to choose, and this was the best way. When the men discover I’m pregnant, I’m sure my decision will fall under closer scrutiny. Too bad. Being queen needs at least one perk, and choosing to keep the mated men alive is the one that works for me.
Over the next two hours, we look at images of the original Federation stronghold where I worked. We estimate they moved roughly five thousand people before blowing the tunnels. They couldn’t have gone far. The images are time sequenced. None of them show movement in any direction.
The answer has been in front of us all this time.
The Federation troops have three small camps within a mile of each other. We never understood the significance. Now we realize what we thought were small camps were actually camouflage. The real might of their military is below ground. The camps were never a big enough target for us, and we stayed away.
We discuss each possible contingency for hours. We’re tired and hungry. I glance at each of my guard, no longer willing to argue with King about who belongs to whom. These men will die for me and I will die for them. “We leave in six hours. That will give us just enough time to shave our heads.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Federation Territory
King
Six hours later, minus braids, and practically bald, we’re settled on the plane. The look on Alden and Labyrinth’s faces match mine. We are unrecognizable as Warrior with our shaved heads. I’d rather dress in pink.
“You would think your power was in your hair the way you whiny babies are handling this,” were Marinah’s exact words. Personally, I was resigned to my fate and remained stoic, hoping one of the men would talk her out of it. Her alpha stare came into effect, and she chopped a section of her braids off with her sword. The men followed suit, giving me sad puppy dog eyes while we sheared our heads. Beck kept his mouth shut from that moment on. If Maylin hadn’t saved the day and trimmed up the mess we made, the lot of us would have needed to go completely ba
ld.
I run my hand over the prickly stubble. Cutting our hair was necessary for Marinah’s plan to work. Her hand lands on my opposite arm. I pull her close so she rests her head on my shoulder. “Sleep,” I whisper and thread my fingers into the short hair that is maybe an inch longer than mine.
Her wicked eyes follow the movement of my other hand on my own head. “Poor furbaby,” she says. “It will grow back, I promise.”
“What did you call me?” I ask with indignation.
Her laughter fills the plane. Labyrinth and Alden look over. Both have hands to their shaved heads. “We really need sleep,” she says when her laughter fades.
I close my eyes. “As my queen wishes.”
It takes eleven hours to reach the drop point. We parachute in as human. If someone from the Federation spots us, we want them to see outpost soldiers which aren’t the threat we are. An old gas station at the edge of the city is where we gather. We change from the outpost fatigues to three red stripes and one officer’s uniform.
“The idea is for you to appear human,” she says as she walks around each of us once we’re dressed in the Federation gear. “It would help if you shrank six inches, lost fifty pounds, and took the scowls off your faces.” Alden snickers. He’s not accustomed to Marinah’s battle humor.
Labyrinth questioned me on the plane again about the female Warrior who gave Marinah the texts. He and Alden plan to travel to the women and return with mates. They’re on a mission to find their Marinah and who am I to deny them.
Nokita talks about settling down without war and death. Beck is happy with Missy, and I’m sure they’ll have a child soon. Cabel’s wife’s baby is due any day. Alden and Labyrinth deserve happiness. I can’t help wondering if there will ever be a time without war. It’s been part of my life for so long. Even when I was young, I knew I was different. I wasn’t a farmer. The last thing I wanted was to grow up and work our land. I spent years, after my first shift to Warrior, resenting my Beast. It was Uncle Greystone who saved me. He showed me what I was capable of and what I was made for.
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