by Penelope Sky
She watched me too, looked into my face with her beautiful green eyes, eyes so gentle that she could never hurt anyone who didn’t deserve it.
Her beauty was more powerful than all the pain killers I took. She took away my pain just by looking at me, just by loving me. She brought me peace, brought the stars to my ceiling, brought the summer meadow right into my bedroom. “I love you.” There was no specific moment that those feelings had dawned on me, that she’d said something that suddenly made me feel that way. It had just happened, and when it did, the feeling was infinite, like I’d always felt that way, even before I met her. I couldn’t remember what my life was like before she walked into it, even though it had only been a few months ago that I was fucking whores and picking up strangers at bars. It was like…when your life suddenly became so complete that you didn’t want to remember what it was like to be incomplete.
Her fingers lightly pressed into mine, as if she was saying it back with her affection instead of her words. Her eyes lit up slightly, like she still wasn’t used to hearing me say those words, and she wasn’t used to saying them back. “I love you too.”
Two
Catalina
I decided not to tell him the truth.
There was no point when I wasn’t sure what I was going to do about it.
My heart wanted to stay, wanted to be with the man who made me feel things no one else ever would. But I was also a smart girl, and I knew this high wouldn’t be enough to keep myself happy forever. Someday, I would want more.
Heath could never give that to me.
It was selfish to ask my father and brother to like someone they had every right to loathe.
So, I chose not to think about it, chose not to dwell on it, to live in the moment…until that moment was gone.
I walked upstairs and looked through the glass doors, seeing Heath work with the physical therapist who came to his place to help him. His ribs were broken and wrapped tight, and they would heal on their own in time, but he needed to keep moving if he wanted to keep his strength, to minimize the pain.
Heath dropped onto the bench and sat there, taking a break because the pain was too much. With his head bowed, he breathed hard, like he’d picked up a monster truck tire over his head just seconds ago.
The therapist held the resistance bands and waited, giving him a moment to pull himself together.
I felt wrong watching him struggle. I knew he wouldn’t want me to see him like that, not at his full capacity, so I turned away and headed back downstairs. I looked out the large floor-to-ceiling windows and tried to clear my throat, to drain the water that formed in my eyes. Seeing him in pain was unbearable. I tried to focus on his progress rather than his pain, because he was doing so well. Just had to be patient.
My phone lit up with a text message from Anna. Hey, I stopped by your apartment to say hello. You aren’t home?
I guess that meant Damien didn’t discuss me with her much. I’m at Heath’s.
Well, you want to meet for lunch?
I looked up the stairs like I expected Heath to be standing there, but I knew he would be occupied for the next hour. He didn’t need me right now. Sure. Where do you want to go?
We shared an appetizer while we waited for the food to come out. We also shared a bottle of wine, even though she had to go back to work when this was over.
“Sofia is gone.” She answered my question about the hotel. “She went on maternity leave a week ago and had the baby. He’s healthy and super cute.”
“Aww, that’s great,” I said. “What’s his name?”
“Demetri.”
“Demetri Lombardi,” I said. “Sounds like a king or something.”
“Well, Sofia and Hades love him like he is,” she said with a chuckle. “I’m happy for them, but I do miss having her in the office.”
“Do you think she’ll come back? She’s got two kids now.”
“I think so. Her mother lives with them, so she watches the kids while Sofia’s at work. She likes working.”
“I used to have a crush on Hades when we were younger.”
“Really?” she asked before she took a drink from her wine.
“Yeah, but this was like…” He’d been in my life a long time, since I was young, because they were so much older than me. “When I was eighteen, nineteen, so a long time ago. Now I just see him as another brother, sorta.”
“Don’t tell Damien I said this, but Hades is hot. And definitely don’t tell Sofia I said that.”
I laughed. “Your secret is safe with me. But I’m sure she already suspects every woman thinks that.” I definitely knew every time Heath went anywhere, every woman was staring at him, wanting to rip off his clothes. “So, how are you guys?”
She didn’t talk about the rift between Damien and me, trying to stay positive so it wouldn’t bring me down. “We’re fine. He’s been a little distracted lately, but he’s getting better with every passing day. What about you?”
I didn’t answer because the waiter brought our food. After setting it down, he walked away. I grabbed my silverware and started to eat my salad. “Honestly, I haven’t been all that great. I’ve been staying at Heath’s to help him… He was in such bad shape.” That was all I could say about it.
Anna had pity in her eyes, but she was also quiet, like she didn’t know what to say. She was loyal to Damien, and she also had a strong attachment to my father. Her feelings were obviously conflicted. “Is he doing better now?”
“Much,” I said quietly. “He’s not the kind of man to let anything defeat him, so he’s working hard to heal.”
“That’s good.” She pushed her salad around with her fork.
I could feel it beginning already, feel the awkwardness that descended on the table when we discussed the man I was sleeping with, the man who had been unanimously ostracized by my family, even Anna, who wasn’t actually married to my brother yet.
“So…you’re going to stay with him, then?” She stabbed her fork into her food, bits of egg, bacon, and cheese, before placing it into her mouth. There was a melancholy tone to her voice, as if what she asked was forbidden.
“I…I don’t know what I’m doing.” I tried not to think about the decision I would have to face since I was falling more in love with him every second I was by his side. He looked at me in a way no one else ever had, like he saw me all the way down to the bone.
She stopped eating, giving me all of her attention. “Yeah… I can’t imagine.”
“This is the man I love. But I know everything Damien said is right. It’s not the kind of relationship that I want forever.”
“Then be with him until it burns out. You’re young.”
“I’ve thought of that, but I’m afraid it’ll just get harder and harder to leave.”
“Yeah…”
I pushed aside a big chunk of tomato then went straight for the cheese crumble. “I don’t understand why this is happening to me. I don’t know why I have to love a man who’s not right for me.” Why did the gypsy give me that reading? This was bound to happen whether I visited her or not, but why did it have to happen at all?
“I’m sorry, Cat. Did you tell him about all this?”
I shook my head. “No. If I do, he’ll try to talk me out of it, and I’ll be stuck. I need to think it over for a while, then make a clean break if I decide to.”
“Honestly, it sounds like you’ve already made up your mind.”
I looked at her. “Yeah?”
“It sounds like you’re going to leave him…eventually.”
I dropped my gaze, my heart breaking at the thought. What we had was real, true, and I didn’t want to live my life without that man beside me. But I didn’t want to lose my family either, lose the future I’d pictured in my head since I was young. My father wouldn’t be around much longer, and Damien would be the only family I had left.
When I got home, Heath had already showered after his workout. He wore sweatpants without a shirt, standing in t
he kitchen while he put together a sandwich for lunch. His ribs were no longer wrapped and there were still blotches of discoloration on his skin, but he wasn’t the punching bag he used to be. His firm muscles were visible again, his fair skin beautiful now that some of it had healed.
He tore a few pieces of lettuce and placed it on top. “You want a sandwich?”
“No, I already ate.” He didn’t ask me where I’d been even though he knew I’d left the house. I moved into him, seeing the strong muscles of his back.
He turned to me, his arm circling my waist as he pulled me in. His face looked down into mine, and he stared at me like he was waiting for permission. His mouth wasn’t cut up anymore, and the swelling had gone down. He had even healed enough to shave.
We hadn’t kissed yet. He’d been too injured for that kind of affection. But now he looked at me like he wanted to, like he wanted to embrace me the way he used to. He tugged me a little closer, his large hand spreading across my entire back.
I rose on my tiptoes, my eyes open and locked on to his, and I kissed him.
He kissed me back, watching me with his possessive gaze.
Just like always, I felt it. Felt that powerful spark between our lips. My hand moved to his arm, and I felt his muscles, felt the powerful frame that was still strong under those bruises. I closed my eyes as I let my lips linger against his.
His other hand moved into my hair, sliding until he cupped the back of my head. He kissed me again, moaning between our breaths like he’d never had a kiss so good, even though we were barely moving our lips. It was our chemistry, our connection, that lit us on fire.
He pulled away and placed his forehead against mine, his eyes closed. “I can’t wait to make love to you.”
My hand cupped his cheek, looking up into the face of the most beautiful man I’d ever seen. The second we were apart, I was cold as ice, but when we were together, I melted all over again…became a slave to this powerful man. “You’re doing it right now.”
I packed my bag on the edge of the bed and zipped it up.
Heath entered the bedroom but stopped when he noticed what I was doing. He leaned against the frame of the door, crossing his arms over his chest, like he intended to block my path so I could never leave.
“I have to work tonight…and tomorrow.”
He stared at me coldly, like he didn’t accept that answer.
I pulled the strap over my shoulder. “You’ll be fine without me.”
“I never needed you to begin with. It was just an excuse to have you here.” His voice was quiet, but it contained a natural amplification, like the depth of his voice made it more potent.
I moved around the bed and headed toward the door. “I can’t stay here all the time.”
“Why not?”
A sigh escaped my lips. “I’ll be back in a few days.” I approached the doorway and waited for him to move.
He stared at me defiantly, like he wasn’t going to go anywhere. But then he dropped his arms and stepped aside.
I moved down the hallway and started to descend the stairs.
He was close behind me, his bare feet loud against the hardwood floor.
I didn’t want him to take the stairs when he was still recovering, so I turned around to say goodbye.
He wore a slightly sad expression in his eyes, like it was hard to watch me go. He never asked me if I wanted to be with him or if my stance on our relationship had changed. He just assumed we were together again.
But that was a fair assumption to make.
His arm circled my waist, and he pulled me close, his lips near mine. “It’s hard for me to let you go…when I just got you back.”
My hands gently rested against his chest, my eyes on his mouth. “It’s not for long.”
“It’s an eternity to me.” He pressed his lips to my forehead, letting his warm mouth linger as he embraced me. “I’ll be back to normal soon. I’ll be the man you fell in love with. I’ll be the man who protects you, the man who can lift you with a single arm and throw you over my shoulder.”
I pulled back so I could look him in the eye. “Babe, I don’t think less of you.” My attraction to him hadn’t changed. He was still the most desirable man on the planet, even with his scars.
He sighed quietly, as if he thought less of himself.
“I know that’s your entire identity, but there’s more to you than that. And all those things are still there.”
“Yeah?” he whispered.
“Yeah. Like your arrogance, your sarcasm…”
He smiled slightly, immediately feeling better when I teased him.
“The way you look at me…the way you kiss me…”
His arm tightened on my back.
“And I’ll never forget the way you looked in that cage. You’ve come so far, survived when anyone else would have died. Look at you now, and it’s only been a few weeks. I don’t think less of you… I think more of you.”
I worked over the weekend, back to the stage after telling everyone I was sick with the flu—again. But no one seemed annoyed by my absence, especially not my understudy, who finally got to take the stage for a few nights.
When the performances were over, I went home to my apartment—alone.
I wanted some time away from Heath because I’d been at his side since I’d seen him in the cage. We’d been inseparable, and I’d barely had the opportunity to process what had happened.
Damien texted me. Want to come over for dinner?
Maybe Anna had told him how miserable I was, and he felt bad for me. Or maybe the invitation was completely unrelated. Or maybe he was proving how my life would be if I stayed with Heath—that the man I loved would never be included. Just the three of us?
Hades and Sofia are coming too. Hades is also bringing his brother Ash. And Dad.
I didn’t know Hades had a brother. That’s quite the dinner party. It made me feel worse that I couldn’t bring Heath, because if I’d wanted to bring anyone else, the answer would have been yes.
Well, it’s a special occasion…
I read his text a couple times, growing suspicious of his meaning. Is that supposed to mean what I think it means…? I didn’t want to spell it out in case Anna got a glimpse of his screen or his messages popped up on his iPad.
Yes.
I cupped my mouth with my hand as I understood exactly what was about to happen. I’ll be there in 15 mins.
We gathered in the dining room, our loud voices bouncing off the vaulted ceiling and becoming even louder when they echoed back at us. The empty bottles of wine were quickly replaced, and Hades had Andrew in his arm, while Sofia took care of Demetri, who managed to sleep through most of the dinner.
“Your babies are so cute,” I said. “Are you guys going to have more?”
“No,” Hades answered. “Two is enough.” He moved Andrew to the other arm when he started to get fussy.
His brother Ash was beside him, similar in appearance and just as quiet. He seemed to be older than Hades, but not by much. My father clearly took a liking to him because he kept talking to him.
Ash was nice enough to pretend to be interested.
Damien clinked his spoon against his wineglass to get our attention. “Hey, shut up for a second.” He rose to his feet.
“Yeah, that’s a great way to get us to be quiet,” I said sarcastically.
Anna smiled up at him, clearly having no idea what was about to happen next.
I knew Anna didn’t have a family and she’d adopted us as her own—so it was the perfect way to ask.
“Everyone here is like family to me,” Damien said, turning his gaze on Anna. “But there’s someone here who shouldn’t be like family. She should be family…”
When Anna started to understand what was happening, her expression completely changed, a mixture of shock, joy, and love.
“She should have my last name. She should be the mother of my children. And she should be the person I grow old with.” He set the glas
s down and fell to one knee, pulling out a ring from his pocket. He held it between his fingertips as he looked her in the eye. “Will you be my wife, Annabella?”
She covered her mouth and gasped when she saw the enormous rock he presented to her, the ring I’d convinced Damien to get instead of the modest one he’d originally picked out, and her reaction was purely genuine.
You’re welcome, Damien.
“Oh my god…yes.”
He smiled before he slipped the ring onto her finger.
We all clapped and shouted, getting even louder as we celebrated.
Dad seemed to be the happiest, staring at his son with joy in his eyes, like he’d wanted this moment longer than anyone else…and he was thinking of my mother at the same time.
I wanted my father to look at me the same way when it was my turn, and if I married Heath…that would never happen.
“Girl, that ring.” Sofia grabbed Anna’s wrist and turned her hand. “Jesus, that is the size of a boulder.”
“I know,” Anna said. “My hand is already sore.”
“It’s stunning,” I said, so happy she liked it. “You love it?”
“It’s gorgeous,” Anna said, examining her own hand like she couldn’t stop staring at it.
I wanted to tell her I’d helped my brother pick it out, but I didn’t want to make it about me, so I kept my mouth shut.
Dad came over and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Now, I have two girls, equally beautiful.”
“I disagree with that,” Damien said from the other side of the room.
“If my wife were here, she would love you,” he said. “Absolutely love you.”
“Thank you, Richard,” Anna said quietly.
“Dad, she is here,” I said. “She’s always here.”
He gave me an affectionate look before he placed his hand on my shoulder. “Come with me for a second…”