by Leslie North
“I got this, boss,” Lonny said, reaching around the fence post they’d just reset to grab the wire Scout was holding.
Scout nodded his thanks and stepped away, looking down at the phone he’d managed to retrieve. The number wasn’t familiar, but he felt obliged to answer it now he’d gone to all the trouble.
“Hello?”
“May I please speak to Scout Beckett?”
“This is he,” he answered, cursing silently that he’d interrupted what he was doing for some damn telemarketer.
“Mr. Beckett, this is Nina Wallace at County General Hospital.”
Scout’s irritation turned to anxiety in a heartbeat.
“We wanted to let you know that there’s been an accident involving Ms. Steadman—”
In that split second, in the space between the words the caller had said and the words to come, Scout’s entire world changed. No longer was he a young, healthy man with a promising career and a loving family. No longer was the farm he’d been trying to purchase for six years foremost on his list of life goals. No longer did anything else under the sun matter but Stella and that baby. That baby he hadn’t even asked for but God had seen fit to give him. Please don’t take them back, his mind pleaded. Please don’t take them back.
“…She’s here, and we’ve checked her in. There’s been some bleeding…”
Scout’s head began to swim. The sun was too bright, the air too hot. He missed words. He gasped for breath.
“…keep her for observation overnight…”
His hands began to shake. He couldn’t hold onto the phone. As it dropped from his hand, he saw someone catch it from the corner of his eye. But he was too busy bending over, hands on knees, trying to fucking breathe.
“…Yes, I’m a family friend. I’m with him right now. I’ll take care of it, and if you could tell Stella, we’ll be there as soon as possible. Thank you.”
Scout desperately sucked in another ragged breath, his vision clearing somewhat.
He felt Lonny’s hand on his back. “Take it easy, man. Slow breaths. You got this. She’s okay. But I’m going to take you to see her. Come on. Truck’s right over here, just keep breathing, we’ll take it real slow.”
Ten minutes later, Scout watched the landscape roll by out the window of the truck as Lonny drove just fast enough to show he knew this was an emergency, but not fast enough to get pulled over.
“You feelin’ better?” Lonny asked.
Scout cleared his throat and turned to Lonny for a moment. “Yeah,” he murmured. “Sorry about that.”
“Hey, I don’t blame you one bit. If I’d gotten a call like that about Desiree or one of the kids, I’da had a damn panic attack, too. But you gotta’ believe it’s all going to be okay. Keep sending her those good vibes, and we’ll be there in a few minutes.”
When they finally pulled up to the hospital, Lonny drove into the ambulance bay where the ER entrance was. “I’m going to drop you and get back to the farm for your appointment with the USDA guy.”
Scout’s head throbbed. “Oh, shit—”
“Nope,” Lonny said with a grin. “Not a word. I got this. And I called Hunter and Bran. The cavalry’s on its way. You just get in there and give your pretty lady a big kiss.”
Scout climbed out of the truck, then turned to face Lonny. “I don’t know how to thank you,” he said.
Lonny reached out a hand, and they clasped palms for a moment. “No thanks needed, just bring our girl home. We all really like having her around.”
Scout nodded, shut the door, and jogged into the hospital, his heart beating in time with his prayers.
13
“So the heartbeat is strong, but this trauma has caused some contractions. We don’t want that to continue, and the best way to achieve that is lots and lots of rest.”
Scout watched the monitor with the image of the baby and the little fluttering flash in the center of his chest. Yes, his. Even at five months, there was no mistaking what was between those tiny legs. The little guy had obligingly turned himself butt up toward the camera, and Scout had worked not to whoop with pride.
Stella squeezed Scout’s hand as she lay on the bed, her hospital gown lifted as the doctor moved the wand over her belly.
“You just tell me what I need to do to take care of her, and I will,” Scout vowed to the doctor.
The doctor, the same one who had called Scout after Stella’s car accident, smiled. “If you’ll promise to make her behave, I’ll let her out of here in the next couple of hours instead of tomorrow morning. She needs to be put to bed, served lots of healthy food, and not let up for anything but bathroom and shower breaks for at least a week. We’re going to want her back here in seven to ten days to check on everything. In the meantime—” The doctor turned her gaze to Stella’s. “If you continue having contractions, or they get worse, or you have any other unusual symptoms—pain, fever, vomiting—I want you back here in the ER stat. Okay?”
Stella nodded, her expression one Scout wasn’t familiar with.
The doctor put the ultrasound machine away and tucked the sheets back around Stella. After she’d left, Scout rolled his stool closer to the head of the bed, keeping Stella’s hand in his.
“Hey,” he said, caressing the hair at the crown of her head. It was the first time he’d been able to speak to her alone since he’d arrived. He craved touching her, knowing logically she was fine but needing to prove it to himself. To run his hands over her hair, her skin, her belly. “Are you really okay?” he asked.
She gazed at him, her blue eyes tired and scared. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
“No.” He gave her a hard look and a tender caress on the cheek at the same time. “None of that, now. The deputy who came to the accident was waiting outside when I got here because he was worried about you. He told me exactly what happened. You weren’t being reckless, you just didn’t know that turn was blind. You know how many people have hit that pole coming around that turn?”
She shook her head, tears still hovering in her eyes.
“It’s a dangerous stretch, but the county doesn’t have the money to fix it, so all of us who’ve lived here forever know it’s there, and then someone passing through, or a new teen driver, will hit it once every three months or so.”
“When the airbag went off, I thought for sure it had…” she stopped and swallowed, and all Scout could think was to climb right up onto the bed with her. He pulled her into his arms, one hand on her belly, and just held her, murmuring words of comfort. He knew what she’d thought. It was the same thing he’d thought when he got the phone call. Amazing how something that hadn’t been planned could become so important in only five months.
“I’m so glad you’re both okay,” he whispered into her soft hair. She clung to him, and for a few minutes, they silently held one another, listening to soft sounds from the hallway outside, both saying their private thanks that things hadn’t gone terribly wrong.
“My car?” she finally asked, her head comfortably relaxed on his chest.
“The deputy said he’d called the tow service to get it out of the way. But that airbag went off. I don’t want you driving that car anymore.”
He felt her stiffen. Which was good. It meant she was feeling better. “The doctor said bed rest for a week. I’m not going to be locked in the house for the next four months. That car only has sixty thousand miles on it, and I’m going to need—”
He chuckled. “Slow down there, cowgirl.” She glared at him, and he grinned in response. “I didn’t say you shouldn’t drive, just that I don’t want you driving a car that’s been that damaged. I’ll drive your granddad’s old pickup, and you can drive my truck. It’s got four-wheel drive and one of the highest safety ratings on the road. It’ll be like wrapping the two of you in a solid steel blanket.”
She made some sort of grumpy noise, then settled back on his chest.
“Eventually, I’ll need my own car again,” she told him. For some reason, that p
roduced a bitter sensation in the back of his throat.
But he didn’t want to upset her right now, so he let it go. “That’s fine, but for now, this solution will work. After you’re off bedrest, of course.”
“Of course,” she muttered.
Then the door swung open, and Ava’s head popped in. “Are you all up for visitors? The doctor came out and said it was okay.”
“Of course,” Stella answered, “tell everyone to come in.”
As both his brothers, their wives, and Cam came in, Scout stepped aside and watched. He was grateful, for sure, but something else was brewing inside of him, and he could tell it was big, and frightening. Maybe as frightening as the thought of losing Stella and the baby.
Stella was going to lose her mind. Four days into her bedrest, she wanted to pummel something—or someone.
“How are you doin’, sweetie?” Jean Anne said as she walked into the bedroom carrying a lunch tray.
Stella closed the lid on her laptop and set it aside.
“I’m going crazy,” she said. “I swear, if I don’t get out of here soon, I’m going to end up one of those women who talks to little dolls and dresses up their dogs.”
Jean Anne shook her head and laughed softly. “Oh you precious thing. Here.” She set the tray across Stella’s lap. “You need to drink the smoothie—that was Scout’s order—and have some of this sandwich. Why don’t I sit and keep you company while you eat?”
“Please,” Stella said gratefully. “You can talk about anything. Paint drying would be more interesting than my morning.”
“I thought Scout had given you all sorts of books and crosswords and things to do?”
Stella held her smoothie up, looking at it suspiciously. “He did…” She set the glass back down and picked up the sandwich instead, curling a lip when she saw it had spinach on it.
“Don’t blame me,” Jean Anne advised, watching Stella’s reaction to the food. “I’m just following instructions. That boy has an entire list of things I’m supposed to give you to eat and drink and do. I’ve never seen a man fuss so much as he does over your health.”
Stella couldn’t help the smile then. It was silly, but she’d never once thought she wanted someone to care about her well-being. No one had, with the exception of about the first five years of her life. But then Scout had started making her eat right, and get enough sleep, and take safety precautions, and lo and behold, it felt nice. Like he really did want her to be safe and healthy.
Oh, she knew it was just because she was pregnant, but it was still nice. He was still nice.
“But I’m right,” Scout said from the doorway. “So y’all had better listen to me.”
Both women rolled their eyes, then smiled at one another.
“Well, it looks like your entertainment has arrived. I’m going to clean up that kitchen and then put a load of laundry in before I go for the day. You make sure and tell me if you need anything else before then.”
“Thanks, Jean Anne,” Scout said, giving her one of his trademark charming smiles.
“Thank you, Jean Anne,” Stella echoed as Scout came and sat on the edge of the bed next to her.
Jean Anne closed the door behind her, and Stella found Scout turning that same smile on her.
“You’re bored,” he said.
“Ohmigod so bored.”
He laughed and took a bite of her sandwich.
“Honestly, Scout,” she whined. “I can’t do it anymore. I can’t sit in this bed one more day. I can’t.”
“Sshh, sshh, hon,” Scout laid his fingers over her lips. “I know it’s hard. But I am so proud of you. You’re doing this for our baby, and you’re taking such good care of him. You’re already the best mom I know.”
Stella’s heart contracted. Mom. She didn’t feel like a mom. And she wasn’t sure what being a mom entailed. She hadn’t had much of a model.
“Thanks. I think that might be a bit of an exaggeration.”
“Nope. My momma raised me right. I never lie.”
She laughed and took a bite of the sandwich as he held it out to her.
“But I have a suggestion for something you could do to keep busy.”
She sat up a little straighter. “You definitely have my attention.”
Scout held out the smoothie next, and Stella dutifully took a sip.
“Well, Bran pointed out to me that it took Ava months to order all the stuff for their daughter, Janelle. Cribs, bassinets, changing tables, clothes—I guess—I mean, babies need some sort of clothes, right?”
Stella stared at him, not entirely sure how to respond. Baby things. Yes, babies did need things. Of that she was sure. But what things? She didn’t know. And cribs? Changing tables? Those sounded like the kinds of baby items you used in a permanent place. Not what you took along when you were moving baby from place to place on consulting contracts. “Um…baby things.”
“Well, I took a look at my savings account, and I think I could chip in a thousand. But you should put together a list, and if that’s not enough, I can dig up some more.”
Stella suddenly felt sick. A thousand dollars? Why would Scout give her a thousand dollars for baby things when the baby wasn’t even going to be living with him?
“That’s really…generous…” she said awkwardly.
Scout’s smile began to fade. “It’s not generous, it’s my kid. And if that’s not enough, then I’ll figure out how to chip in more. I mean, I know it’s expensive and—”
“No. No.” She put her hand on his. “I didn’t mean it wasn’t enough. It’s more than I can afford, and you’re wonderful to offer it. The thing is, I’m not sure there’s any point in getting cribs and changing tables when I don’t know where I’d put them.”
He looked at her in confusion. “Well, I figured we’d just use the bedroom…” His voice faded away, and she could see the moment it all connected. His gaze went hard, then coldly neutral.
“Right. No place to put that stuff when you’re traveling the world.” His tone became painfully false. The tone you’d use when you were trying to hang up on a telemarketer. “I guess I thought the point of us getting to know each other was so you’d feel comfortable staying here with the baby.”
“And I thought the point of us getting to know each other was so you’d be comfortable setting up some sort of arrangement for the baby to spend part of his time with you here in Texas and the other part with me wherever I was.”
She knew then that they’d made yet another mistake. Just like they’d fallen into bed that first time and made the baby, they’d been falling into bed ever since and making a mess.
“So, you should probably get some rest.” He stood. “I’ve got to get back to work.”
“Scout…” She sounded forlorn even to her own ears, and something in her chest ached. A voice inside her head said she was doing this all wrong, but she couldn’t bear to figure it out right then. She only knew this was one of those moments, like the moment she’d read that final plastic stick and seen the blue lines, like the moment she’d answered the phone and heard her grandfather was dead. A moment when her world would shift, and after would be different than before. It didn’t escape her notice that Scout was there in some way at each of those life-changing moments. And he was here now, but she could feel him leaving. See his eyes and how they were changing.
“I’m sorry you’re bored,” he told her, hand on the doorknob. “Lonny said Maria was going to come by and visit later today, so maybe that’ll help.”
“Okay. Thanks.” She watched him warily.
“I’ll be by after work. See how you’re doing.”
She just nodded, and then he was gone.
14
Scout kept his head down as he made his way from the main house to the milking barn. But when he reached the barn, he kept right on going, past the equipment barn, past the garages, all the way to the first empty pasture he reached. He opened the gate, walked through, and kept on going.
He w
as halfway across the field, long grasses catching on his jeans, flies buzzing around his head, when the phone in his back pocket buzzed with the tone for his brother Hunter.
“Dammit,” he snapped as he stopped and pulled it out to answer. “Yeah?”
“I take it I’ve caught you when you’re all tied up?” Hunter’s deep voice rolled over the line.
Scout sighed. “No. No, I’m just taking a little walk.”
“Uh-oh. You only take those walks when you’re about to lose it. What’s goin’ on?”
Scout squinted as he looked up at the pale blue sky and the bright sun that was almost directly overhead. He didn’t want to do this. He didn’t want to have to tell his brother how badly things were going. How he’d gone and assumed since he and Stella were getting along so well, it meant something more than just passing time until the baby was born.
“It’s nothing,” he told Hunter with a sullen tone that sounded adolescent to his own ears.
“Scout. What’s going’ on?” Hunter demanded.
Scout ran a hand through his hair as he began to pace in circles in the pasture. “Stella and I have been—”
“Sleeping together, I’d assume. I mean, I knew you were spending a lot of time at the main house, and the way you looked when you were at the hospital the other day…let’s just say it was pretty obvious.”
“Yeah, well, I guess I assumed that meant something it doesn’t. It’s my fault. I screwed up, and now I’m right back where I started.”
He heard Hunter say something quietly to someone, then he was back. “Which is where, exactly?”
Scout stopped, one hand on his hip as he looked back toward the buildings on the property, the heart of the farm he’d put so much of his own heart into. And that was when he realized that none of it would ever matter again if Stella and the baby weren’t there with him.
“With Stella determined to take the baby and go back to work—all over the world.”