by Roma James
Her cheeks had been flushed, whether from the heat or the tears or both, but turned a deeper shade of pink at my question.
“They’re out by the barn, I think,” she said, giving me a pretty smile that would have been even better if it had been completely genuine. But I couldn’t help but notice that as pretty as it was, it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Uncle Justin wanted to show Cade our new foals. They’re really cute—a colt and a filly this year.”
On any normal day, I would have loved to sit and talk about horses with her, especially since her smile had actually brightened a little when she’d mentioned the foals. But she still hadn’t answered my other question, and… damn it, I just had to make sure she was okay.
“I should go out and find them,” I said, still not moving from my spot next to her. “And I don’t mean to pry, but—”
“Everything is okay,” she finished for me, smiling sweetly again. “I was just… well, never mind. It’s going to sound dumb.”
“No,” I said, shaking my head. “It isn’t dumb. No matter what it is, it isn’t dumb. But you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I just couldn’t leave you standing here looking upset.”
“Thank you,” she said, the tremble in her voice giving away the lie of her pretty smile. For a moment, I thought she might start crying again, and I silently cursed myself for pressing the issue. But she held it together with the help of a few ragged breaths. “I was just standing here cooking and… and I started missing my parents.” She shook her head. “It’s been over a year since I lost them, and sometimes it hurts so much it might as well have been yesterday. I just…” Big tears started rolling down her cheeks again. “I just miss them so much.” She dashed at her cheeks as I moved to give her another hug. “They would have really enjoyed tonight. They loved having people over—any excuse for my mom to make a big meal.”
Damn. My heart was breaking for this girl. She was way too young to have to deal with that kind of grief. It was enough to break a person at any age, but it was especially cruel to someone just starting out in life.
“I won’t lie to you and say it gets better,” I said, holding her tightly as she cried against my shoulder. “And I wish I could say the pain goes away sometime, but it’s been five years since I lost my wife to cancer, and I still think about her all the time.” I paused, trying to collect my thoughts as a wave of emotion hit me. Jesus, I hadn’t anticipated getting caught up in my own damn feelings. “But the pain fades eventually, and then it becomes a little easier to focus on the good times you shared.”
“When?” she asked, her voice quiet and muffled as her whole body shuddered with a deep breath. “When does it get easier? When does it stop feeling like my whole world is upside down?”
“I wish I could give you a good answer.” I took a deep breath of my own. “You’re allowed to feel whatever you need to feel, though, okay? Don’t let anyone tell you any differently. And if you ever need anyone to talk to—” The sound of the back door opening made me cut my words short. Probably for the best, if I was being honest. “You okay?” I whispered, giving her shoulder a squeeze as I took a step back to put a respectable distance between us again.
She nodded and wiped the last tears away just as Cade and Justin walked into the kitchen.
“I was just about to come looking for you guys,” I said, stepping between them and Janessa in case she needed another couple of seconds to get herself together. “Janessa says you have some new foals, Justin?”
His eyes narrowed for a split-second, then he nodded. “We do. Cade and I were just down there checking on them, but then it started to rain and…” He paused, giving me another hard look. “We figured we should get back up here.”
Next to him, Cade grinned. I had to fight back my own smile. I couldn’t blame the old guy for being protective. He clearly loved his niece, and he had good reason to be suspicious of my intentions.
“Supper is almost ready,” Janessa said, stepping around me with that smile perfectly in place again. “You guys have time to wash your hands, and then we can start eating.”
“Good food and good company.” Cade was still grinning as he looked back and forth between my face and Janessa’s. I wondered what he was thinking. He probably wouldn’t have believed that she’d been crying and I’d been on the verge of tears myself just a few seconds before. “Sounds like a perfect night to me.”
“And the rain,” Janessa added. “It’s hard not to be happy with the smell of fried chicken and spring rain in the air.”
She was right. They both were.
After our talk, I felt closer to Janessa than I would have thought possible. Grief was a shitty thing to have in common, but it was really good at bringing people closer together.
And everything else about the night so far—the food, the scents, the sound of rain on the porch outside?
Yeah, I had to agree that it was pretty damn perfect.
The rain seemed to be coming down faster by the minute as we finished the delicious meal that Janessa had prepared. It had started out as a gentle, soothing background noise, but now… it sounded like Mother Nature was just pissed off.
“I didn’t think we were supposed to get this kind of weather tonight,” I said, giving Cade a quizzical look. “It’s gonna make for a long drive home.”
Had he even checked the forecast before driving us a hundred miles in the wrong direction?
Yeah, stupid question.
I could tell from the look on his face that he hadn’t anticipated a storm like this, but it would serve him right for—once again, for the millionth time—jumping into something without taking a second to think it through.
As long as we didn’t end up in a ditch on the way back home, it would just be another day in Cade’s life.
“You guys can’t drive in this,” Janessa said, her blue eyes going wide with worry as she looked from me to Cade. “Please don’t tell me you’re even thinking about leaving right now. Not in this rain.”
Cade spoke up first. “I don’t think we’re talking about leaving right this second, but we’ll be okay. We’ve driven in worse weather than this plenty of times.”
He wasn’t wrong, but that didn’t mean it would be an easy-breezy trip home. And it didn’t seem to do much to reassure Janessa, either.
“Uncle Justin?” She looked across the table with pleading eyes. “You know we can’t let them leave while it’s so nasty outside. They’re our guests.”
I could see the conflict playing out on the older man’s face. He had a good heart and good manners, and he obviously didn’t want to say no to his niece. But he clearly didn’t relish the thought of me and Cade spending too much more time here in his house.
“You guys probably shouldn’t drive home in this weather,” Justin grumbled, his eyes shifting from me to Cade and back again. “And if it gets too late, we can probably just put you up in the bunk—”
“In the guest bedrooms,” Janessa interrupted him, making his scowl grow even deeper—a feat I hadn’t thought possible before now. “The bunkhouse has mice and a leaky roof, and we have plenty of room right here.”
She smiled sweetly, but there was a defiant tone in her voice that was a little impressive if I was being completely honest. Impressive and… fuck, it was sexy, too.
When Justin didn’t challenge her, her smile grew even wider. “Good,” she continued. “That’s settled, then. You’ll both stay here tonight.”
I gave Cade a questioning look, but he just shrugged and grinned. “I guess I’ll call our foreman and tell him we won’t be back until the morning.”
“Perfect,” Janessa said, clasping her hands together. “Are you guys ready for dessert, then? We have apple pie and ice cream. And maybe some coffee?”
“Sounds amazing,” I said, my eyes following every move she made as she stood up and turned back toward the kitchen. Across the table, Cade’s eyes were also glued to her curvy figure as she walked away.
“You guys ha
d better get some rest soon,” Justin said, giving us both a hard look. “I’m sure you’ll want to get back home first thing in the morning.”
We both nodded because the implication was clear. He didn’t want us under the same roof with his pretty young niece for a minute longer than absolutely necessary.
He was a smart man.
Because even though Cade and I had made an agreement just a couple of hours earlier, I couldn’t honestly say either of us were strong enough to stick to it.
Especially here.
With Janessa.
Overnight.
Chapter 4
Janessa
I couldn’t sleep.
No matter how much I tried or how many times I tossed and turned in my bed, I just couldn’t clear my mind. Those few moments in the kitchen with Boone when I’d been crying had opened up a floodgate of emotions that I still hadn’t fully recovered from.
God, I could still feel the heat from his hard, muscular body. He hadn’t hesitated to pull me in for a tight hug, and even though it had definitely not been the hot, sexy kind of moment that I would have preferred, it had still been memorable.
Maybe even more memorable because it had been nice. Sweet. Comforting. I’d felt safe in those strong arms. And the way his voice had broken when he’d mentioned his wife…
I took a deep breath before I started crying all over again.
I hated that either of us—or anyone else, for that matter—had to go through that kind of pain, but there was something comforting about knowing that I wasn’t completely alone. I wasn’t the only person in the world who had gone through something unspeakably awful and managed to keep going. There were plenty of days when it had been easy to believe that nobody could ever understand the pain I felt, but… Boone understood.
Turning over again, I made the mistake of looking at my bedside clock. It was seriously the middle of the night, and I had zero hope of getting back to sleep anytime soon.
If Mom was here, she’d make things better.
She had always known exactly how to make everything better, whether it was a cold or a bad dream or just a bad day. It usually involved a hug and some hot cocoa. With whipped cream.
God, how long had it been since I’d had hot cocoa like that?
Way too long.
My feet hit the floor and I was moving before I’d even made a conscious decision to get out of bed. But there was no point in trying to talk myself out of it—I needed something to soothe the pain of all those old memories, and my mom’s favorite remedy seemed like a fitting choice. I was already starting to feel a little bit better just thinking about it as I walked out of my bedroom and started down the hallway toward the stairs.
The old floorboards creaked as I walked past the guest bedrooms, and I stopped, holding my breath and hoping that I hadn’t made too much noise. I knew Cade and Boone had to get up early to go back home, so I didn’t want to do anything that might wake them. Thankfully, Uncle Justin’s room was at the other end of the hall, because I definitely didn’t want to explain to him why I hadn’t been able to sleep.
Plus, I was pretty sure he was a little irritated with me over the whole Cade and Boone thing—first about inviting them over for dinner and then insisting that they spend the night.
In my defense, though, it really had been raining hard all evening, and I really was worried about them driving all the way back to their own ranch.
I slowly exhaled the breath I’d been holding and started to move again, wincing as the top step groaned under my weight. I was going to wake the whole house up if I wasn’t careful.
I took one last look to the left and the right, to each of the rooms where Cade and Boone were staying, and wondered what would happen if either of them did wake up. Would they come out to check on the noises in the hallway? Would Boone give me another one of those great hugs if I told him I hadn’t been able to sleep?
Would he offer to hold me just like that if I was in his bed?
A flood of heat rushed through my body as I hurried down the stairs. Best not to think too much more about things like that. Hot cocoa might be good for frayed nerves, but I wasn’t sure how effective it was when it came to fighting off hot fantasies.
Uncle Justin would be mortified to know I’d been thinking about our guests that way and would definitely do his best to make sure they never came over to visit again.
So yeah, it was in my best interest to make sure everyone stayed in their own beds tonight.
And hopefully, if the hot cocoa did the trick, I’d be back in my own bed soon, too.
“I thought I heard something outside my door…” The deep voice behind me made me nearly drop my steaming mug of cocoa. “You couldn’t sleep, either?”
An embarrassingly high-pitched noise—okay, maybe it was a tiny scream—came from the back of my throat as I turned around and tried not to have a heart attack while also trying desperately not to spill the drink that I’d just painstakingly made.
“Oh, my God,” I said, my heart beating so fast it seriously felt like it might burst right out of my chest. “Cade Winslow, you scared me half to death. You can’t go around sneaking up on people in the middle of the night like that.”
He just grinned and shook his head. After spending a little time with him earlier in the evening, I was pretty sure that good-natured but sort of cocky smile was his default expression. And I had to admit, it suited him. He was a handsome man even when he wasn’t smiling, of course, but the way he was looking at me now? With those mischievous brown eyes and that little half-dimple in his left cheek?
Cade was downright sexy, and I was pretty sure he knew it.
“I’m pretty sure you’re the one who woke me up first,” he said, taking a few steps closer until he was standing next to me at the kitchen counter. “Those old floorboards don’t lie, you know.”
“You heard me coming down the stairs?” I asked, my eyes going wide. “Did I really wake you up? I was trying to be quiet, but—”
“No worries,” he said, cutting me off with another smile. He leaned in to nudge me with his shoulder, an innocent, friendly move that really shouldn’t have made my whole body tingle—except that’s exactly what it did. “I’m a pretty light sleeper.” He winked. “And I won’t promise I wasn’t already awake.”
God, the way he was looking at me and the way his low voice was rumbling like thunder made everything he said sound so… hot. Like a sexy secret just between the two of us.
Which was definitely just in my head.
Almost definitely.
Guys like Cade gave everyone that same flirty smile, right? And he’d certainly always been a complete gentleman around me, no matter how many times I might have fantasized about how that low, sexy voice would sound saying dirty things in my ear.
“Everything okay?” he asked, quirking a brow as his eyes quickly dropped to my lips before returning to hold my gaze again. “You seem… a little flustered.”
Oh, God.
I was a lot flustered, but was it that obvious? And the way he’d just looked at my lips hadn’t helped. What had made him do that, anyway?
Not that I was complaining at all. Except now the only thing I could think about was how his own lips might feel against mine. Would they be rough? Would that light stubble on his chin hurt if it brushed against me?
I blinked, belatedly remembering he had asked me a question.
What was it?
Oh, right. Flustered. That was putting it mildly.
“I’m good,” I lied. “I was just, um…” Wondering if you wanted to kiss me. Wondering what it would be like. Wondering if I could go back to your room. “I think I probably just need to get some sleep.”
The second part wasn’t a lie, at least. Going back to bed before I could say anything stupid was probably the best thing I could do.
“I should get some sleep, too,” he said, cocking his head to the side. “But instead, I’m here in the kitchen with you.”
And th
ere he went again, with every word that came out of his mouth sounding way sexier than it should. It was like his super power, and whether he knew it or not, it was really hard to resist.
He shifted his weight against the counter, and I was pretty sure he was standing closer to me than he had been before. Or maybe the room had tilted sideways. I couldn’t tell for sure. I just knew that my body was suddenly hot. Too hot.
I parted my lips slightly to try to catch my breath, and I saw it this time for sure—Cade leaned in just a little closer. Our faces were just inches apart, and I realized that maybe it was the heat coming off his body that I could suddenly feel.
Oh, God.
Was this really happening? Was he going to—
“You two having a party down here?” The voice from the darkened kitchen doorway made Cade and me both jump back away from each other. Boone stepped into the kitchen, a knowing look on his face as he looked from me to Cade. “And you didn’t even invite me?”
“Not a party,” Cade answered, looking more than a little embarrassed. “We were just talking.”
“I couldn’t sleep,” I offered, raising my mug. “So I came down here for some cocoa. I was just getting ready to go back to bed, though.”
Boone nodded and then turned his attention back to Cade. “And I’m guessing you couldn’t sleep, either?” He quirked an eyebrow. “What a coincidence.”
“Coincidences happen,” Cade shrugged. “And besides, this storm could have woken anyone. Isn’t that why you’re down here now?”
Boone grumbled something I couldn’t quite hear, something that had been directed at Cade and hadn’t sounded very happy at all.
Cade turned back to me and gave a sheepish smile. “Guess it’s time for me to call it a night, too. Next thing you know, your uncle will be down here, and we’ll all be in trouble.”
I laughed nervously, but my eyes darted toward the dark hallway behind Boone just in case. God, Uncle Justin showing up right now was the last thing I wanted to happen.