by Force, Marie
“Don’t be sorry. I’d so much rather be alone with you than in a room full of people, but I’m sorry you don’t feel well. We’ll get you fixed right up.” He kisses my forehead and goes into the other room to use the house phone. I fall asleep to the low rumble of his voice on the phone calling for help.
Chapter 12
I’m so hot. I have to be on fire. And then I’m freezing, my teeth chattering from the chills that torture me. Flynn pulls my hair back while I puke into what might be an ice bucket that he holds for me. My throat hurts too much to ask him what’s wrong with me. Whatever it is, I’ve never felt this bad in my life.
All I can do is sleep when I’m not puking.
Fluff is there, too, whimpering, but it takes more energy than I have to comfort her. I hear Flynn telling her that Mommy is sick. I’ll have to thank him for that when I can. He’s nice to her even after she bit him—again. I love him for that.
I fall back into a restless sleep filled with dreams about things I’d rather forget. I’m at the governor’s mansion, and Oren is there. He’s attacking me, hurting me. I’m screaming and crying and telling him to stop. I beg him to stop, but he doesn’t. Then Flynn’s mother is there, telling me it’ll be okay, that they’re taking care of me.
But Oren pushes her away and tells her to get out before he hurts her, too. I want to protect Stella, but I can’t move. My arms and legs are like lead pipes, refusing to follow my orders.
“Natalie.” Flynn’s voice breaks through the sound of my own screams. “Sweetheart, wake up. You’re dreaming.”
My eyelids seem to weigh a ton. I force my eyes open. He looks terrible. His hair is standing on end and his eyes are wild, as if he’s been awake for days.
“You were dreaming,” he says, wiping tears from my face. He kisses my forehead and both cheeks. “Do you think you can drink some water?”
I’m desperately thirsty, so I nod. Just that small movement sets off a painful blast in my skull that has me gasping.
He brings me a glass of ice water with a straw that he holds for me.
The cold water is like heaven to my parched throat, but it lands with a gurgle in my empty stomach. “What’s wrong?” I ask him.
“You’ve got the flu.”
“Your mom…”
“She was here to check on you yesterday.”
“Yesterday?”
“It’s been two days, Nat. You’ve been totally out of it. We came very close to taking you to the hospital, but the doctor came here to check on you so we wouldn’t end up in the news again.”
“Two days.”
“Two very long days.”
“Have you slept at all?”
“Not much. I was too freaked out to sleep.”
I want to reach up to touch his tired face, but my arms won’t cooperate. “So sorry to freak you out. And to puke all over you.”
He cracks the faintest of smiles. “You didn’t do that. Came close a few times.”
“Ugh, how sexy.” The thought of nearly puking on him makes me feel worse than I already do. “Sorry.”
“You think I care about that, Nat? God, I was so scared that something was seriously wrong with you and everyone was missing it. I was afraid to sleep, that I would wake up and you’d be… Well, I was scared.”
“I know I must smell gross and I’m probably communicable, but will you please get in bed with me and hold me?”
“I’d be very happy to do that.” He gets up to go around the bed and gets in with me.
I turn away from him because I don’t want to infect him any more than I already have.
“You don’t smell gross. I got to give you a sponge bath yesterday. We enjoyed that very much.”
“We?”
“You and me.”
“So you took full advantage of my feverish state to get handsy with me?”
“You know it.”
His arms around me are exactly what I need. With my head cushioned on his arm and the heat of his body warming me, I begin to feel the slightest bit better. And then I remember… I was expecting my period when I got sick. “Flynn…”
“What, honey?”
“I know we just got settled, but I could use the bathroom.”
“No worries.” He gets up, comes around to lift me right out of bed and carries me into the bathroom. “Take it easy. You’re going to be really weak and wobbly.”
I grasp the sink, hoping to stop the world from spinning. “I’m okay if you want to give me a minute.”
“You can pee in front of me, Nat.”
“I don’t think I can, actually.”
“I’m afraid to leave you.”
“I’ll hold on. I promise.”
“Call me if you need help.”
“I will.”
As soon as the door clicks shut behind him, I get busy checking what’s going on below. Nothing. I’m beyond thankful he didn’t have to deal with that on top of the puking and the rest.
I immediately regret a quick glance in the mirror. I use the last of my dwindling strength to brush my hair and teeth before I call for Flynn to give me a lift back to bed.
“Do you think you could eat something?”
“I don’t know. Maybe some soup. Later. First I just want to close my eyes for a minute while you hold me.”
“We can do that.”
The next time I open my eyes, sunshine fills the room and I’m alone in bed. I experiment with moving my arms and legs, which seems easier than it was the last time I was awake. My headache seems a bit better, too. I attempt to sit up and have to take a moment before the spinning stops.
Flynn comes into the room wearing a pair of basketball shorts and those sexy glasses that make him look so smart. His hair is standing straight up and he hasn’t shaved in days, but he still makes my heart beat a little faster just by walking into the room with Fluff hot on his heels.
“You look better.”
“I feel a little better.”
“Thank goodness. How about some food?”
“That actually sounds good.”
“Progress, Fluff. I told you Mommy would feel better soon.”
“You guys are getting along okay?”
“We’re living proof that you can teach an old dog new tricks. She’s learned not to bite the hand that feeds her.”
My heart melts at the adoring gaze Fluff directs his way. “Glad to see something good came out of me getting stricken with the plague.”
“I also got a ton of work done, and I’m all caught up, which makes Hayden very, very happy.”
“Oh good.”
“Not good. I never want to see you that sick again—ever.”
“Let’s hope it was a one-time thing.”
“The doc says you have to take it really easy for a week to ten days, so I canceled the trip to London.”
“No! You have to go! I’ll stay home while you go.”
“Absolutely not. I’m not going anywhere without you.”
“But you’re going to win!”
“I can’t believe you just said that out loud.”
“This is no time for your superstitions.”
“Natalie…”
“You have to go.”
“I’m not going without you, and you can’t go. That’s the end of it.”
I recognize defeat when I see it. Sighing, I say, “I was really looking forward to going to London.”
“We’ll get there. For now, we’re going to chill at home until you’re fully recovered, and that’s that.”
“I hope you don’t get it, too.”
“I won’t. I seriously never get anything.”
“With all your superstitions, you’d better be knocking on some wood with that statement.”
He makes a big production out of knocking on the bedside table. “Now let’s get some food into you.”
* * *
True to his word, after we finally check out of the hotel, we don’t leave the house at all over the next week. We
watch him win the BAFTA for Best Actor on TV, and this time Marlowe accepts the award for him. During the week, Flynn works from his home office, participating in conference calls with the Quantum team in between checking on me and waiting on me hand and foot. He also oversees another meeting of the foundation board of directors, which I sleep through.
“You’re like my butler,” I tell him when he makes lunch for me on Friday, the day before the Valentine’s Day party his parents are hosting to celebrate our marriage. This is the first day I feel somewhat normal, although I’m still far more tired than I should be.
“We can role-play that sometime. I’ll be your faithful servant, and you can be the mistress of the manor who orders me to service her in more ways than one.”
“Ohh, I like that. Could I dominate you in this scenario?”
“To a certain extent.”
“When can we do that?”
“You might not want to light the fuse, baby. I’m feeling a little pent-up over here.”
“Awww, my poor sweet hubby has been so neglected by his sick wife.”
“You’re racking up the demerits,” he says with a teasing grin.
I rest my hands on his chest and look up at him. “Tell me the truth. Have you been taking the edge off on your own?” I can tell right away that the question has surprised and maybe shocked him.
“Whatever has become of my sweet, virtuous wife?”
“She married a sex-crazed maniac who has turned her into one, too.”
“Is that right?” He zeroes in on my lips, his eyes heating with desire. “Maniac, huh?”
“Answer the question.”
“Since you came down with the bubonic plague, I have not once touched the equipment except to pee and wash it.”
“I don’t believe you.”
He takes my hand and covers his rock-hard erection. “He’s all yours—and only yours—whenever you’re ready to get back in the saddle.” Kissing my forehead and then my lips, he says, “P.S., it’s no fun without you. I hope you’re happy that you’ve ruined a long career of monkey spanking.”
“That’s very gross and very funny.”
“Also very true. I have no desire to ‘take things in hand’ when you’re around.”
“And this is a… new… development?”
“Very new. The hand and I go way back. It’s been a jarring breakup.”
I laugh so hard that my sides ache.
“This is the second time you’ve laughed at my pain. More demerits.”
I resist the urge to roll my eyes. “If I were to help you with this pent-up situation you’ve got going on, would you let me leave the house?”
“Only if I can go with you.”
“Will I get to drive?”
“That could be arranged.”
“And will you take me to the club tonight?”
“Oh, well, um, you’ve been so sick. You might not be ready for that yet.”
“I’m ready.” I run my finger down his chest and hook it in the waistband of his jeans. “I’m more than ready.”
“I’m afraid to touch you right now.”
“How come?”
“The pent-up thing we previously discussed.”
“So you’re afraid you might scare me?”
He bites his lip and nods.
I lean close enough to touch my lips to his ear. “Do your worst.”
His arms band around my waist as he lifts me up and over his shoulder.
I let out a squeak of surprise as he takes us into the bedroom, coming down on top of me. He breaks the contact only long enough to all but tear the clothes from our bodies before he returns, wrapping himself around me. “This is gonna be fast,” he whispers the second before he captures my lips in a kiss that tells me how much he’s missed being close to me while I was sick. His hands are everywhere, tweaking my nipples, stroking my back and bottom, caressing the slick heat between my legs.
“Need you so bad, Nat.”
“Take me. I’m all yours.”
As he slides into me fully in one deep stroke, I arch my back, needing to be closer, as close as I can get.
He takes my hands and holds them over my head, our eyes meeting as he makes certain this is okay with me. It’s more than okay. I wrap my legs around his hips and meet his every stroke. He pulls out of me, leaving me reeling and on the verge of exploding.
“Turn over.”
When I’m posed on all fours the way he wants me, he kneels behind me, grasps my hips and drives into me again. “Yes,” he whispers. “I wanted to be deeper.”
I drop my head to my forearms and submit to him completely. He’s taken such tender care of me during my illness. I want to give back to him in every possible way.
“Ah, God, Nat…” His fingertips dig into my hips, and he picks up the pace. Then he reaches around to stroke my clit.
“Flynn…” He’s not my Sir right now. He’s not my Dom. He’s my husband, and I love him desperately. “Please…”
“Yes. Now. With me.”
It’s perfect and beautiful, and the connection I feel to him is nothing short of spiritual. He has truly been there for me in good times and in bad, and we’ve had plenty of both in our first six weeks together.
He rests on top of me, the way he always does after he makes love to me. I love the way he holds me afterward while our bodies cool and pulse with aftershocks.
“Flynn.”
“Hmm?”
“Thank you for taking such good care of me while I was sick.”
“It was my pleasure to take care of you, but don’t ever scare me like that again.”
“I want you to know…”
“What, honey?”
“That marrying you was the best thing I’ve ever done in my entire life.”
“Awww, sweetheart, me, too.”
“A lot has happened since we met, and my life has changed completely—in some ways we both wish hadn’t happened. But even knowing what we do now about what was in store for us, I wouldn’t change a thing if it meant I got to be with you.”
“I’m glad to hear that. Sometimes I wonder if you rue the day your wildebeest led you to me.”
“Best day of my life. No question.”
“Mine, too, sweetheart. Mine, too.”
I’m as thrilled as Natalie to be out of the house and cruising down the Pacific Coast Highway in the silver Mercedes sedan that will be hers when she gets her license. I’ve never given away one of my precious cars. It will be my pleasure to give this one to her.
“We need to schedule your road test. You’re ready.”
“Are you sure?”
“You’re doing a great job. You’d never know it’s been a while since you last drove.” I punch out a text to Addie asking her to get it booked for the week after the Oscars.
“I’m more comfortable than I was before.”
“While we’re on the subject of your comfort, I want to talk to you about the club.”
“What about it?”
“I want you to be prepared for what to expect there.”
“Okay…”
“It’s hard for me to talk about this because I’m so conditioned not to.”
“I understand the need for discretion.”
“It goes beyond discretion, as much as I appreciate that. You’ll see people there you know and like. You’ll see Marlowe and Hayden and perhaps Kristian and Emmett and Jasper in a variety of scenarios.”
“You’ve mentioned they’re all members.”
“The thing is, you can’t look at them with any kind of judgment, no matter what they might be doing or how shocking it might be to you. The club is their place to let loose. It’s where they go to be totally themselves. Every single thing that happens there is done under the basic tenets of safe, sane and consensual. Everyone is there because they want to be, even if they’re on the receiving end of something that might look awful to you.”
“I understand exactly what you’re saying.”
&nb
sp; “I’m not accusing you of being judgmental or anything like that. You’ve been the opposite of judgmental, but this is still very new to you.”
“Will they mind that I’m there?”
“No, sweetheart, they’ll be thrilled to see you there and to know you’ve fully accepted me and my lifestyle. They’ll be happy for both of us and eager to share this part of our lives and our friendship with you.” I glance at her and find her pondering what I’ve said in that adorable, serious way of hers. “It’s hard to explain until you’re really part of it, but by sharing this aspect of our lives, our friendships are deeper and more meaningful. We give each other a safe harbor to get away from the insanity of our public lives. Taking you there will be one of the greatest thrills of my life.”
“Even if we don’t do anything?”
“We won’t do anything. Not there. Not tonight. That’s something we’ll work up to. Tonight we’re there to observe.”
“What if…”
“Say it. There’s nothing you could say or ask that would be wrong.”
“What if I just can’t ever bring myself to have sex with you in public?”
“Then we won’t bring that part of our relationship to the club. But that doesn’t mean we can’t still be part of the club in other ways.”
“What other ways?”
“Supporting our friends and their need for the public demonstrations. Some people get off, big-time, on getting busy in public.”
“Do you?”
“I have, in the past, but it’s not an essential ingredient for me. You and I are forging our own path that works for us. Nothing and no one who came before us figures into that. If you told me that all I could ever have is what we’ve already done, I’d be more than satisfied.”
“But there’s more, right? Things you want to show me and teach me?”
“The variety and options are endless. We’re only limited by our own imaginations. But none of it has to happen in public if that’s not your thing—and I’d completely understand if it isn’t.”
“I haven’t decided anything yet. I’m reserving judgment until I have more information.”
“That’s a very wise way to approach it.” I look up to see that while we talked, we’ve driven almost to Redondo Beach. “Want to go check out the beach?”