by Ancelli
His mother dug into her purse and searched for something. “Open your hand.” Ethan did as he was told and she placed a plain silver band in his palm. “Your father proposed to me when all the odds were against us and look at us, thirty years later with an amazing son.” She touched his cheek. “If you love her like you say you do, the ball is in your court. Today marks the end and the beginning of another chapter in your life. It’s up to you if you want to start the new chapter with Rayn in it or you want to end that chapter in your life.” She got up on her tiptoes and kissed him. “I love you, and I can see that she cares.” She smiled. “I’m still here after I was told my chapter was going to end years ago. Take a risk and if you fail, you’ll eventually get up and try again with someone else.” She walked in the direction his dad had gone.
Ethan looked down at the piece of jewelry in his hand.
Even in the relative safety of the bathroom, Rayn couldn’t stop crying. She’d never doubted Ethan’s love for her, but it was evident in everything he did. He even spoken to his parents about her and she hadn’t mentioned him to her parents, not even once. Her father would disown her if he knew she was sleeping with what he would call the enemy, but she’d just learned that her once-best friend was biracial.
How didn’t she know that Ethan’s mother was black? Why didn’t he tell her, and would that have made a difference?
After the incident three months before, Rayn tried her best to keep away from Ethan as much as she could, until that moment he’d cornered her on her birthday. She didn’t condone what he’d done to Colton, even if it was in the name of love. Rayn yearned to be with Ethan, to tell him everything that had been going on since her birthday, but Colton always found ways to remind her that if she told him, Ethan’s blood would be on her conscience. Ethan had attempted to talk to her in class. She’d answered yes or no and continued on like he didn’t exist, but in reality, he was all she thought about.
Why am I so sad? She was the one who’d ended things with him in the first place, so why couldn’t she get over this man?
“Rayn,” her baby sister Nicole called out, entering the bathroom. “They are lining up. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” She sniffled, wiping her eyes. “I get nervous at big events.”
“Are you sure, or does this have to do with that white boy from earlier?”
“What?” Rayn rushed her words. “No, he’s just a classmate.”
“Thank goodness, because Daddy is having a cow,” her sister revealed. “He didn’t like the way he touched you. He thinks it was distasteful.”
Ethan hadn’t done anything disrespectful. “Really.” She rolled her eyes. If her dad only knew the wonderfully distasteful things Ethan once did to her body. Goose bumps rose up along her arms as she thought of him in between her thighs.
“I told him you would never get involved with a white guy.” Nicole chortled. “He’s not your type.”
She wasn’t sure what her type was anymore.
“I’m coming.” Rayn cleared her throat.
The bathroom door closed, and she stepped out the stall. She stared at her reflection. “Get it together. You overcame all the negative shit thrown your way.” Rayn raked her fingers through her silky hair, missing her kinky locks. “I’m proud of myself. Adjust your crown and show the world what you’re working with, even if it takes you longer than planned.” She tapped her face with a tissue and fixed her makeup, held her head high, and walked out the bathroom to the beginning of her adulthood. “A future doctor, coming through.”
She stepped out the door and Maverick almost ran her over as he was making his way to the line. He gently clutched her arm. “Hey, Rayn with a y.” He smiled. “We made it!” Maverick pumped his fist in the air, at that moment someone took a picture of the group.
Rayn chuckled at his antics and then her eyes connected with Ethan’s. Her heart sank, her fears confirmed as her cell phone beeped.
One day, his blood will be on your hands.
“Ethan Alexandre Monet.” They called his name and his heart pounded so hard against his chest, and without second-guessing himself, he took his diploma out of the dean’s hand and turned to the audience. He searched the area with the seated students until he located her.
“Get off the stage,” one of the staff members said as the next student came onto the podium.
“Rayn Taylor,” he yelled. “I love you!” Ethan strolled off the stage with his chest puffed out, after announcing to the world their hidden secret. “Continue!” he yelled back.
Everyone that knew Ethan was in obvious shock. Maverick’s eyebrows drew together, and he snapped his head toward Rayn in surprise and the African American students that knew Rayn looked at her in like they’d heard the worst news ever.
Rebecca’s lips twisted. “What did he just say?” she asked a bit loudly.
The graduation ceremony continued as Ethan made his way through the crowed seats to Rayn and got down on one knee, pushing the people in front of her. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?”
Rebecca covered her mouth with her hand. “You were for real?”
Rayn grabbed her stuff, stood, and ran out of the coliseum. Her parents stood too, and headed toward the exit. Ethan stumbled, trying to get up and rush after her, even though he’d made a fool of himself.
“What the hell was that? Who is that boy?” her father yelled as her sister pulled up in a black sedan. “Get in the car!”
“You said he was a classmate,” her mother chimed in. “Rayn, are you and that boy—”
“Rayn!” Ethan caught up to them. “We need to talk.”
“She has nothing to say to you.” Her father pointed at him. “Stay away from my daughter.”
Ethan didn’t care what her father had to say. “Rayn, I love you.” He gazed over at her. “I get that we’re young and naïve. We’re from different parts of life, as you put it, but I know we’re meant for each other. We can put the past behind us.”
“Is this why you were having so many issues?” Her dad continued to yell. “Is he the reason your door got vandalized, and the threats you’ve been receiving?”
Threats? Ethan thought.
Tears ran down her cheeks, but she didn’t answer her father. Why wasn’t she clearing shit up? That Ethan had nothing to do with the disrespect she endured on campus? Ethan would do anything to defend her honor.
He walked over to the vehicle. “Get in,” her father ordered, opening the car door. She didn’t move, giving Ethan hope. “Now!”
“Don’t yell at her!” Ethan huffed. She didn’t deserve how her father was speaking to her. She wasn’t a child.
“What the fuck did you just say to me?” Her father ambled toward Ethan, taking off his jacket.
Ethan didn’t move, waiting for her father to throw the first punch.
“Don’t get it twisted,” her dad hollered.
“Dad!” Rayn rushed in front of him. “Please stop.”
“Get in the car!” The veins in his neck bulged. “Now!”
Ethan’s chest heaved uncontrollably as he was ready to pounce on the older man the moment he laid a finger on Rayn.
“Jarod,” Rayn’s mother interjected. “Calm down. You’re making a spectacle out of nothing.”
“Out of nothing?” he yelled. “Your daughter has been fu—” He took a deep breath and balled his hand into a fist.
“Rayn.” Her mother clutched Rayn’s wrist. Her dad went to protest, and her mom stopped him. “He made a fool of himself in front of all those people, that’s some kind of love. Jarod, let them just say goodbye.”
Her mom pushed Rayn over to him.
“Hurry up, before I change my mind.” Her dad practically growled the words out, and her mother grabbed Jarod’s arm to stop him from interfering. “Five minutes.”
Rayn took a couple strides. Ethan wanted to pick her up and run out of there like a caveman claiming that this woman was his future.
�
�If you leave…” Ethan’s voice cracked.
Rayn rubbed her hands together. “I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you through. I’ll pray that one day we will meet again.” She finally looked him in the eye.
Ethan gazed back at her as his heart broke into a million pieces. “If you leave me today, I will never meet you again.”
“Ethan, you don’t mean that.” She wiped her tears. “I can’t survive without my parents’ support right now. If I stay with you, we have nothing to stand on. I need stability, something you can’t offer at the moment. I can’t risk our future, not even for you.” Rayn went to touch him and he eased back. “Look what they’ve done to me because of who I am.” He assumed she was referring to Colton and his friend. “You shouldn’t have been placed in a position to defend me because of others’ views.” Rayn sniffled again. “For what it’s worth, I did care about you. This is how things have to be for now.” She walked away in tears.
He went to follow her, but her father stepped in between them. “Whatever you think you two had, ends here today. Do you understand me?” He raised his voice. “You don’t belong in her orbit.”
Ethan’s father had been right about his chances. He wasn’t the right pedigree.
His dad and mother ambled out the stadium. “Hey, don’t you dare touch my son.” His father pointed back at her dad.
Rayn’s father glared at his parents, then back at him. “You ruined what was supposed to be one of the proudest moments in our daughter’s life. I hope it was worth it.” He walked around the car and joined his family. “Stay the hell away from my daughter.”
Ethan’s nose flared as he held it all in, watching Rayn drive away. He’d embarrassed himself in front of thousands of people, and his parents. He shouldn’t be mad at her: she’d ended things months before, but he couldn’t get over her, not then and not now. She was imprinted in his heart like a fucking tattoo. He had to leave before graduation ended and he became a laughing stock, at least not to his face. He couldn’t face those people. “I’m ready to go home.”
“Let me get the truck.” Alexandre grabbed his keys and walked away to the parking lot, leaving him with his beloved mother.
“Mi amor.” She clutched his hand. “Now you know that chapter in your life called ‘Rayn Taylor’ is over. It’s time to turn the page and write a new one. I know it hurt, but her rejection speaks volumes of who she is to me.”
His dad honked. “Your ride is here,” he joked, opening the car door like he was a butler.
Ethan took his mother’s soft hand and gave her the silver ring back. He closed her fist. “Next time, I’ll be sure not to make a fool of myself.”
His mom squeezed his fingers. “She’s the fool.”
To new beginnings, he thought without looking back.
Tears ran down her cheeks as they drove away from the coliseum.
“I can’t believe this shit!” Her father slammed his fist against the steering wheel. He hardly ever cussed, and when he did, it meant he was pissed. “What did we do wrong?” He glanced over at her mom. “A fucking white boy?”
Nicole couldn’t stop giggling. “Well technically, Dad, he’s not white. I think his momma is black.”
“Shut up.” He glared at Nicole and then at Rayn through the rearview mirror. “Wipe that look off your face.”
They stopped at a stoplight. “You have something to say?” Her dad turned his head, looking at Rayn.
She bit her lip, trying to be respectful; however, enough was enough. “You’re a hypocrite.” She stared back at her father, who’d taught her to stand up against injustices.
“What did you say?”
“You preach about love, and fighting the unjust, and here you are, one of the people executing hate. You are judging him based on your stereotype of what you think he is, without giving him a chance.” Ethan didn’t deserve the way her father treated him. “You are just as prejudiced as those racist assholes on campus.”
Her father’s features softened after she said her piece. “I judged him based on his actions.”
“Is this the lawyer talking, or my father?” Rayn asked sarcastically. “Because Ethan’s actions toward me have been nothing but honorable.” She wiped her tears and looked away from her dad. If only he knew the measures Ethan had taken to defend her. She rested her head back on the seat and closed her eyes. Rayn had wanted to say yes, yes, I’ll marry you, but she couldn’t. Her dreams of the future were at stake and Colton was still a problem, a problem she would deal with herself. If staying away from Ethan for now would keep him safe and out of jail, then she would have to find a way to live with the heartbreak.
Chapter Seven
Five years later
Ethan sat under the tent, watching the graveyard workers pour dirt over the casket of a stranger. His father was inside the main building as they prepared his mother’s body for cremation. Ethan couldn’t witness his beautiful mother’s body going through flames.
His mom had finally lost her battle against cancer, but she’d done it, as she had always done all things, with courage and honor. He was there when she took her last breath. Weak and fragile, she lay motionless in the bed as he spoke to her, letting her know it was okay to let go of the pain. Ethan’s heart broke a little more with each breath she took. Silently, he prayed that God would grant them yet another miracle. He was being selfish, but he didn’t want to say goodbye to his queen. She didn’t respond with words, but with a simple touch.
His mother said all she needed to say when she lifted Ethan’s hand to her lips, her shaky wrinkled one clutching his, and pressed her moist lips to his knuckles. Gently, she settled his rough palm against her cold cheek, and caressed it. “Son…” She struggled to pronounce the word; it was the first one she’d said in weeks. “Hi-jo…”
“I’m right here.” Ethan knew then that was goodbye. He couldn’t help the tears running down his face. There was no need to hide them. He bent down and kissed her forehead. “I will always love you, mi vieja. Always…”
“So…” Her hand slowly dropped to her side as the machine signaled that her heart had stopped beating. Magda had requested not to be resuscitated.
“Mom,” he whispered, leaning in to wrap his arms around her fragile body. “Mom, thank you for loving me…” Ethan kissed her one last time before laying her lifeless body back on the thin mattress. He combed her hair with his fingers, tucking a few strands behind her ear, like she used to do to him. He cupped her face with his hands, and he sobbed like a little boy. “You are no longer suffering my queen. Go dance, be free…” His voice cracked. “Tell abuelita, I said…” he covered his mouth with his hand to hold back the cries of agony. Ethan had known this day was coming, but he still wasn’t prepared.
“Magda!” His father walked in. “You got another—” The vase of sunflowers and lilies slipped from Alexandre’s hand and shattered against the floor. “No, no, no…” He rushed over to the bed. “I didn’t get to say….bye,” he yelled. “Magda!”
Ethan couldn’t bear the agony of watching his father’s pain, too. He rushed out of the room, leaving his father to grieve for the woman he’d loved for more than three and a half decades. He leaned against the wall and dropped down into a crouch, crying for his loss.
***
He had been numb since the day she died. His father hadn’t been doing well mentally since the moment they’d moved her in to hospice, so he had to make all the decisions. His mother left explicit instructions on how she wanted to be laid to rest, and he followed them to the letter. Magda de Monet, as she’d called herself in Cuba, wanted her going home to be a celebration of her life instead of a mourning, and Ethan made sure she received it even though he was broken inside. He could still hear the music coming from the funeral home, “Quimbara” by Celia Cruz. Most of her family couldn’t make it from Cuba. Her twin sister had tried to obtain a temporary visa to attend her funeral, but it was denied. Thankfully, her family and a few friends from Miami flew in to say their
final goodbyes.
He was deep in thought until someone placed their small hand on his shoulder. Ethan took a long breath, placing his hand over Jenny’s. “I need some time alone.” Jenny Marques had been with him through his mother’s last weeks. She was one of the home health care nurses who had taken care of his mother until she was moved to hospice.
Jenny didn’t respond, nor did she leave like he requested. She squeezed his shoulder and then circled her arms around his neck.
“I’m so sorry for your loss,” she whispered, her lips moving against his neck.
His heart began beating a mile a minute. “Rayn…?” Ethan shot up as soon as he knew who it was, and he lost all self-control he’d had since the hospital. He pulled her toward him and wrapped his arms around her. “My mother is gone,” he chanted. “I will never see her again.”
Rayn held on to him in silence as he sobbed.
Being in Rayn’s arms gave him comfort, made him feel like everything would be okay. He closed his eyes and inhaled her scent. It took him a few minutes to calm down, and regain his senses, before he could let go and take a step back.
She inched forward and wiped his tears with the tips of her fingertips. He gently clutched her hand. “Thank you for coming, but you can leave now.”
“I wanted to pay my respects,” she voiced softly. “I know how much your mother meant to you.” Rayn’s eyes were glassy.
Holding her hands brought back memories he’d already let die, so he rapidly released her. “How did you know my mother passed away?” Ethan was curious as to who told her.
“It doesn’t matter.” She brushed her palms together. “I told you we would meet again.”
“Rayn, this isn’t the time for us to rehash the past.” Ethan picked up his jacket from the chair. He needed to take his father home to rest.
“I’m staying at the Gallerias neighborhood, if you need someone to talk to.” Rayn opened her purse and searched for something. “I’ve missed talking to you.” She tried to hand him a key. “Number 1225. The passcode to get in through the gate is my birthday.”