by Ancelli
He scratched his chin. “That softens the blow, because if he was that baby’s father you would be moving out into the gutter with him.” Jarod stormed out of the room. “Where did we go wrong?”
“Neither one of them can find out, at least not now,” her mother whispered.
Rayn assumed the other person she meant was Ethan. “I can’t keep this secret from him.”
“You will,” she replied. “Unless you want end up living in the middle of nowhere in Oklahoma, or worse, that family coming after your baby because of who his father is. Do you hear me?”
Her mother was right. She couldn’t put her unborn child at risk. Ethan had shared, many times, how poor they were. If her father kicked her out, she wouldn’t have anywhere to go, no one to turn to, if Colton came after them. She thought of telling Ethan about the baby and asking him to remain quiet but if she did, he wouldn’t be able to let them be. The baby had to come first.
“I pray it’s a boy. He’s always wanted at boy. In the end he will fall in love with our grandbaby. You’re safe with right here with us, Rayn. We won’t allow anyone to hurt your baby. I promise.” Her mother strolled out of the kitchen. “A baby might bring some happiness into this house.” She looked back at Rayn. “Give us some time.”
Rayn was surprised by her mother’s reaction. She’d expected a longer lecture or even a scolding. It didn’t add up, her mother letting her off so easy, but in the end, her mom probably had her own reasons for keeping Rayn and the baby close.
***
Rayn watched sadly as Ethan drove away, then slowly closed the front door. How do you tell a four-year-old that his mother fucked up big-time, and his father never knew he existed?
“Ethan’s mad at you.” Her mom peeked her head out of the kitchen. “I told you to tell him sooner.”
“You did?” Rayn asked sarcastically, rolling her eyes. Her mother had told her to call Ethan a year ago after her father revealed that Colton was finally paying for everything he’d done throughout the years. Her dad had kept watch on him, making sure he didn’t make a move against Rayn and Alex, even filing a restraining order against Colton. She’d found out that Colton had become a cop in his hometown and was presently being accused of abusing his powers. Thankfully, Colton couldn’t come near her. If he did, her father would make sure he paid.
Her mother talked all that shit about who was going to take care of Alex, and she’d ended up babysitting her grandson for the last four years.
“Mr. Ethan Alexandre!” Her sweet little boy ran out of his bedroom with his cape flying behind him. “Where is he?” Alex went from room to room. “Mr. Ethan!” he squealed loudly. “Nana, where is he?”
“Baby, Nana has no comment.” Her mom returned to the kitchen.
No comment? That was a first.
“I didn’t get to show him my baby pictures.” Alex lifted his tablet in the air with one of his baby pictures on the screen. “I wanted to take a picture with him, build memories like Grammy.” He swiped the screen with his index finger, showing her pictures of him and Ethan’s mother. “Grammy said he would be happy to meet me.” Alex stood there, watching her with pouted lips. “He don’t want me?”
“What? Don’t be silly?” She plastered a fake smile on her face. Rayn would do anything to make her son happy. “He just needed some time to think of all the amazing stories he has to share with you. Remember, Grammy said your dad used to love comic books. He was into superheroes like you.” Rayn wasn’t making sense, talking about superheroes at a time like this. She was trying to clear his little mind from thinking Ethan didn’t want to get to know him. She was a bit confused, too. This wasn’t how she’d intended on telling him that he had a son, but even so, his reaction was hurtful. Ultimately, though, she had no one to blame but herself.
“Really!” His lips curled up. “She did say that.”
“He wasn’t expecting such a huge surprise.” She bent down, cupped his face, and kissed his button nose. “Who wouldn’t want a sweet cupcake like you?”
“We gotta find him. I have a lot we need to talk about.” Alex jumped in place. “Mommy, get dressed. We gotta go get my dad.” He trotted toward his bedroom. “I can’t wait to talk to him!”
“You’re right.” She followed him. It had been a long time, and she had no excuses for what she did. Fear of the unknown wasn’t a good enough excuse.
Chapter Ten
Ethan sat on the porch swing at his parents’ farmhouse. He couldn’t believe he had a four-year-old son. He looked up, turning his unfocused gaze toward the barn on the other side of the dirt road. Memories resurfaced, of the day he’d surprised his parents with the house sitting on three acres of land. He’d saved up for three years in order to be able to put down a good amount.
He smiled, remembering at his mother’s face when he’d pulled off her blindfold. She’d covered her mouth with her hand as she took in the banner hanging on the entrance of the farm: Welcome Home Mr. & Mrs. Monet.
“Oh my God!” His mom had yelled, jumping in place. “You didn’t.”
“Son…” His dad gazed at the land ahead of them. “Is this for real?”
“Yes.” Ethan handed them the golden keys. “You’ve sacrificed so much for me. This is my way of saying thank you.”
His dad kissed his cheek, wrapped his arms around him, and gave him a bear hug. “Thank you…” he whispered over and over.
His mom placed her hand on his back and started praying. “Oh God, thank you. I lived to see this day.”
“I couldn’t find a spotted pony, but I did find a white horse.” He pointed at the barn.
His mom took off jogging down the dirt path toward the barn.
He shook off the memory as the front door cracked open, and his dad stepped out onto the porch with a coffee mug in his hand. “Your mother loved sitting out here and looking at the animals.” He stared sadly at the red barn. “I miss her.”
“I know,” Ethan whispered. “I miss her too. I need Mom now more than ever.” In moments like this she always had words of wisdom.
“I’m here, you know.” His dad took a sip of his drink.
“I know, Dad.” He placed his elbows on his legs thinking of his newfound son. “I just need a woman’s perspective on why they do stupid shit.”
“Are we talking about someone specific?”
Ethan covered his face with his hands. He shouldn’t have left without saying goodbye to Alex.
“Is this about my grandson,” his father asked nonchalantly, “and his mother?”
Ethan’s head snapped up in his father’s direction. “You knew?”
“It wasn’t my place to tell you.” His dad leaned on the door.
“What do you mean, it wasn’t your place?” Ethan huffed. “You’re my father! You don’t owe Rayn shit.”
“I didn’t keep quiet because of her.” He cleared his throat. “Your mother wanted to tell you. I was there when Rayn walked in with Alex, and we both were in shock. After the shock and anger wore off, your mother was so full of joy to meet Alex. She made me promise that if she couldn’t be the one to tell you, Rayn should.” His dad took a long sip. “Rayn made a horrible mistake, but you need to talk to her. You share a son.”
Ethan sat back, unable to look at his dad. His father had known he had a child for what—over a month?
“Rayn brought Alex to visit your mom almost every day. I knew she wasn’t going to run away again; she would keep her word.” Alexandre placed his cup on the side table. “I was consumed by your mother’s health.”
Guilt racked Ethan. He finally glanced over at his old man. The past year had been hard on his dad. He’d lost a lot of weight. He should’ve known his father knew about his son: his parents shared everything. There wasn’t a day he wasn’t at Loving Care until visiting hours were over.
“I didn’t like how the overnight staff treated your mother.” Alexandre swallowed. Ethan remembered having this discussion with his dad and the management. There were morni
ngs when his mom hadn’t been changed, or her medication wasn’t given. “It was your ex that stepped up and helped us out.”
Ethan raised an eyebrow.
“Rayn became the physician’s assistant on staff overnight.” His dad sat next to him. “She sacrificed her free time for your mother. The fresh flowers every week, that was courtesy of Ms. Taylor. So, before you go judging her on one mistake, albeit a major one, take a look at everything else she’s done since.” He pointed at the barn. “The spotted pony your mother adored, guess who gifted it to her?”
How was he supposed to know she’d done these things?
“Before you ask, she didn’t want you to know,” his dad continued with his revelations. “Rayn took care of your mother because she wanted to. She said it had nothing to do with you, but we both know that’s a lie. She wouldn’t have known your mother if it wasn’t for you. I got to know that young woman and what I see, I like. She’s a great mother to your son, and one heck of a physician’s assistant. The doctors on duty left her alone overnight. That should tell you how good she is.”
Ethan’s heart was staring to settle as he listened to his father speak so well of a woman he once loved.
“Your son,” his dad chuckled, “reminds me of you when you were a kid. He is so inquisitive.” His father’s lips thinned. “Don’t turn your back on your kid.”
“I would never.” Ethan tapped his feet on the wooden floor. “I was overwhelmed when I saw him. I’m not ready to be a father.”
“When are we ever ready?” His father placed his hand on his shoulder. “Do you think she was ready to be a mother right after college? Son, you need to swallow your pride and talk to her.”
“I need some time,” he revealed. “I’m just not ready.”
“You better get fucking ready. You don’t have time to decide if you want to be a father or not.” His dad stood. “Because your son has been waiting for you for over an hour. He fell asleep in your mom’s favorite recliner.”
“Asleep?” Ethan raised his voice. “What do you mean?”
“Rayn came by looking for you.” He smiled, looking inside the house. “Have you seen him up close, how that boy resembles your mother?”
Ethan turned around and looked through the window. Alex was tucked in a corner of the recliner, covered with his grandmother’s quilt.
“I know you’re afraid of this new role that has been handed to you, but son, I know you’ll make a great father. Alex has been waiting to meet you.”
“Where’s Rayn?” Ethan wondered about his ex since he didn’t see her truck. “She left him with you?”
“I am his grandfather.” His father chuckled. “He asked me what he should call me, and I told him anything he wanted. He came up with Popa.”
Ethan stood and quietly entered the house. He sat on the couch, facing his little boy. He watched him sleep, looking so peaceful. He wondered what Rayn had told Alex about him. Did he know the truth, that he hadn’t known of his existence?
He couldn’t wrap his mind around the fact that he was a father. Was he cut out to be anyone’s father? Was he ready for such a big role? Would he be good enough for his son?
“You’ll make a great father.” His dad patted his shoulder. “I’m the example of what not to be.”
Ethan drew his eyebrows together. “What?”
“I came to this country nearly forty years ago with big dreams and ended up living worse than in my own country,” Alexandre explained. “I wanted to give you and your mother the world, but life slapped me in the face a few times. We almost had it all. I worked at the dairy farm and two other part-time gigs and your mom got her certification as a teacher’s aide. The money wasn’t much but it was enough. Then we had you after years of trying and praying for a child, and life was good. Your mom was supposed to go back to school to get her degree, and then we found out she had cancer. Our whole world crashed around us. The hospital became our second home. After your mom was diagnosed, the bills started to pile on and there was nothing we could do. Your mom was too weak to continue working, and I didn’t mind working even if I needed to have five jobs. I was laid off from my primary job because I took too many days off to be with your mother through her rough days.”
Ethan didn’t know his dad had been fired; this was all new to him.
“The assistance the government gave us wasn’t enough and before we knew it, we were overwhelmed with unpaid bills. We tried to recover, but it was too much.” His dad swallowed. “We weren’t going to let our mishaps affect you. We wanted to give you the American dream, something we didn’t accomplish. I’m sorry, son.”
“Dad.” Ethan gazed at his old man. “We may not have had much, but our house was filled with love. God always saw us through, and he continues to see us through anything. Not once did I want for food on the table. You did what you had to do to provide for your family. I am grateful for all the sacrifices you made for me and Mom. I pray that I’ll become at least one ounce of the father you are to me. Don’t ever,” he raised his voice, “ever doubt what a great father you are. Money isn’t everything. Money couldn’t save Mom even if we had it.”
Alex’s eyes fluttered open. He rubbed his eyes and turned his head to look at Ethan, and his lips curled up. “Mr. Ethan.”
“Mr. Ethan…” Ethan repeated, gazing at his little boy. “Is that what you want to call me?”
“No.” Alex sat up. “What should I call you?”
“Would Dad work for you?” Ethan glanced up and his own dad was no longer in the room. He’d never thought about anyone calling him dad before today.
“Daddy!” Alex’s lips curled up into a smile mirroring his own. “Grammy said you would be so happy to meet me.”
“She was right.” He got up from the couch and sat on the floor next to his son. “You are someone I didn’t know I would meet. Being a dad is new to me, but I’ll learn quickly.”
“Mommy learned, too,” Alex took a deep breath, “and after she learned, she said I would meet you one day. Grandpa and Grandma said it was time.”
Ethan was surprised at his revelation. “How’s your grandma and grandpa doing?” He didn’t know how to talk to a four-year-old. He’d kept his distance from children since he could remember, and now he didn’t know how to interact with his own son.
“Granddad is in California and Grandma is at my house with Mommy.” Alex pulled out his tablet and sat on the floor with Ethan.
“At your house?” Did Rayn move to Oklahoma? “Do you guys live here?”
“Yes,” his son replied.
Ethan was more confused than ever when it came to Rayn and the whys of her recent actions.
“I wanted to show you pictures.” He powered on his gadget and maneuvered from page to page. “This is Mommy when I was in her tummy.” He pointed at a picture of Rayn, her stomach was huge. “And this was me when I was born.” He grinned. “I was a big baby.”
“I see.” He read the index card on the incubator. Baby Taylor-Monet, nine pounds, two ounces, twenty inches, head thirteen inches. Ethan read the captions on each of the pictures in his album.
“Here, you can look.” Alex handed him the tablet and got up on his knees. “Tell me if you want to know something.”
Ethan took the gadget and went through each picture like he was watching a movie unfold in front of him. Alex had pictures and videos with Rayn and her family leading up to images of his parents. Tears swelled in his eyes and began rolling down his cheeks. He paused on a picture of Alex kissing his mother’s pale cheek, and even though she couldn’t talk, Ethan could see the smile on her face.
Tiny hands wiped his tears. “Don’t cry.” Alex wrapped his arms around Ethan and hugged him the best he could. “Grammy is in heaven with Great-Grandpappy.”
He embraced his son and kissed the top of his head. Alex was right: Magda was no longer in pain and she was smiling down at him at this very moment. He looked up and Alexandre, Sr. was sitting in front of them with a big grin on his face.<
br />
“Picture perfect.” His dad took a photo with his cell phone. “Magda, your baby boy has a baby boy…”
This was the beginning of new memories with his son. Next step was talking to Rayn—and getting answers.
Chapter Eleven
Rayn grabbed her goblet off the dining table and headed to the back yard to celebrate her accomplishment by herself. She couldn’t help the smile forming on her lips as she stepped out through the doorway. All her hard work was finally paying off, and she’d done it: she’d purchased her first home. Going through PA school hadn’t been easy, being pregnant at first and then continuing with a newborn; however, she couldn’t be prouder of herself when she graduated. And still, her biggest accomplishment was being a mother. Her proudest moment was giving birth to her Alex.
The view from where she stood was breathtaking. The softly illuminated infinity pool wrapped around the back yard. Rayn took a long sip of the red wine, reminding herself that Alex was in good hands and she didn’t need to call his grandfather again. Alexandre had some strong words for her when she walked in the hospital room with Alex. He’d pulled her outside to the hallway, leaving his wife with Alex, and ripped into her. Rayn deserved every word he threw at her, but then the laughter erupting from Magda’s room changed the atmosphere. Alexandre’s whole demeanor changed and gone was the anger, replaced by thankfulness. They entered the room and Alex was on the bed, tucked under the sheets with Magda, telling her about his adventures.
The hurt in Ethan’s eyes when he found out they shared a son was imprinted in her mind. She didn’t know if he was ready to be a parent. It had taken her months to prepare. She wasn’t mad at his reaction, maybe just a little disappointed because Alex had been so excited to meet him. She should’ve handled the situation better. The reunion didn’t go as planned, and her son beat her to the punch, springing it on Ethan that he was the daddy of a four-year-old.
She sat in the lounge chair and placed her glass on the table. Ethan still made her heart speed up. There was no denying his feelings for her, it was right there in the way he gazed at her. Rayn felt it even through the pain and hurt he was feeling. She was here to fight for her future, and Ethan was the one thing missing in her life to complete her masterpiece.