by Parker, Ali
“You sound as if there is more going on than you two taking a break.” Clara gave me a narrow-eyed look.
“I can’t talk to you about it. You’ve already made up your mind that he’s the devil, and you’re never going to change your mind.”
“I just don’t want you to get your heart broken. So, if there is something going on, yes, you can talk to me.” And get all of her opinions in the meantime? No thanks.
I dropped the half-eaten slice of pizza back into the box. “It was a mistake coming here. I’m not good company.” I didn’t want to upset her back into starving herself. My problems with Seth weren’t worth causing that much grief.
“Hey, I’m sorry, okay? I just care. I don’t want you to have a hard time like I did. Things could be easier for you.”
She would just never understand. Just because someone had hurt her doesn’t mean anyone, especially Seth, would hurt me. And even if I was hurt, it didn’t mean I was going to hurt myself like she did. I was more of a “take it out on someone else” kind of girl.
“I’ll talk to you tomorrow. I’m going to go.” I left her apartment, and when I got in the car, I heard a notification ping on my phone. I glanced down at it and saw that it was Seth. He wanted to talk.
I just wasn’t sure what to do. If Clara couldn’t help me, there was only one person who could.
* * *
I drove across town to the dorms, and when I went inside, it was like party central with loud music, and I was run over by some guy on a skateboard who was using the hallway as his own personal skatepark.
“Watch it, you douchebag!” I pushed him off of me with enough force to put him into the wall, his skateboard taking a roll to the stairs where it became someone else’s obstacle.
“Damn, girl, you’re rough,” said the guy, who was about a head taller than me but twice as lanky. “It’s kind of hot.”
“In your dreams, dick.” I kept going without letting it get to me, and the music got louder as I approached Abi’s door.
When I knocked, I heard her call out. “This better be important!” The music went down, and she flung the door open with all of the force of her backswing.
When she saw it was me, she gave me a bright smile. “Hey, Ave!”
Abigail Hammond was my closest friend in college. A sweetheart and a true beauty with long blonde hair and a perfect tan, her looks were beauty-queen level, and her reputation was just as clean. But that might have been because her brother was on campus to keep her honest.
“Hey, I hope I’m not bothering you. If this is a bad time, I can come back.”
“No, it’s cool. I just thought you were someone from the dorms. Everyone’s bitching about the loud music, but I like the extra noise. And besides,” she raised her voice, shouting into the hall, “I don’t complain about their pot smoking, skateboarding, or the way the rest of this place smells. The last thing I want is another petition stuck in my face.” She stepped aside, and I walked in to sit on her roommate’s bed.
“I still don’t understand why you don’t just live at home,” I said. From what she’d told me, her family only lived a half hour from college, yet both she and her brother decided to live on campus.
“Because I can’t take living with my parents. And I live in the dorm so my brother won’t freak out about my safety.” Her brother was Thomas Hammond, one of Pro-U’s best baseball players.
I shook my head. “Doesn’t he worry that someone might kill you over the noise?” I gave a laugh to show I was joking. “But seriously, what is it about older siblings? They need to trust us.”
“No, kidding. Instead, he bugs the hell out of me.” She plopped down beside me. “So, what’s going on? You look like you have a lot on your mind.”
“I do. When I tried to talk to Seth after practice, he gave me the brush off, but I just got a message from him saying he wants to talk after all. I’m not sure what I should do. I feel like it’s all hot and cold with him.”
Abi gave me a sympathetic look with her big, brown eyes. “So, you’re still crazy about him, aren’t you?” It was much different than the way Clara had asked me.
“Yes, but I told you what happened. What he said that night after the movies?” She hadn’t been any happier about it than I had.
She sighed. “Guys are so dumb. My brother does the same shit. They are sometimes more worried about male posturing than the crap that comes out of their mouths. I’ve thought about it, and I think Seth was just showing off. It’s just guy talk. You shouldn’t let one thing he said ruin everything.”
“But I don’t know what to say. Should I even tell him what’s going on or let it go?”
She gave me a look like I might be crazy. “Hell yeah, you should say something. Just make sure it’s the right time. He needs to know that you need him to stand up for you, and if he can’t do that, he’s not worth it.”
I got a sinking feeling inside. “I want him to be worth it.” I wanted him to be worthy too, and to do something to prove to my sister that he was the real deal, the way that Dillon had with me and my parents.
“I know you do. We all want men to act the way we want them to, but they don’t always get it right. That’s why I don’t date. Boys are too complicated for me right now. And because my brother has already threatened every guy on campus to stay away from me. So that doesn’t help anything.”
“At least he cares,” I said. “Clara is so hellbent on hating Seth from all of the rumors that she will never give him a chance. I’m so glad I have you to lend me an impartial ear.”
“Anytime. Don’t let it get you down.” She patted my shoulder.
“I’m trying, but it’s hard. Can you believe that Clara wanted to call Layla and ask her opinion? I nearly died thinking she was actually going to do it.”
Abi laughed. “Layla’s not bad. I played ball with her before, remember?”
“Oh yeah, I forget that you played softball too. But still, I don’t want to drag her into it. Whatever they had was between them, and besides, they were all into each other’s family lives, and from what I’ve gathered, Seth’s wasn’t so great. I don’t want to bring her into our relationship.”
“I hear you. But still, Layla’s cool. And if she didn’t deter you already, I wouldn’t worry about it. Leave it in the past.”
“Actually, when I saw her at the recovery center with Clara, she was really nice about it. She even gave me some advice. But still, I don’t like hearing about them. I’d hate it even more from her.”
“I think you’re right about that. Things in the past are best left there. Have you had dinner?” She held her tummy. “I’m starved. I thought about ordering something. There’s a hot delivery guy at Lenny’s. I want his number, and I don’t think he has any idea who Thomas Hammond is.”
She was always going after someone her brother didn’t know, as if they were the only ones who weren’t tainted. “Actually, I just had pizza at Clara’s apartment.”
“How about we go out tomorrow? I’m ready to get out and do something. I’ve been locked up here for hours every night this week. You’re the first person I’ve seen outside of practice and class who talked to me.”
“Yeah, we could do something. Tomorrow is great. I’d like that.” I didn’t see her get out too much lately, but then again, if I had a brother looming over my shoulder, I might be the same way. Although Clara was bad enough, at least she couldn’t physically harm Seth. I didn’t think Dillon would do anything I didn’t want him to.
Abi sighed. “I guess. I’m going to order something in and get some sleep. You probably want to go home and talk to Seth.”
I got to my feet. “Actually, I have some studying to do, but I don’t know. I’m still thinking of what to say to him. It’s like the more time that passes, the more awkwardness builds between us.”
“Don’t let it grow,” she said, getting up to change the music which she had left playing softly. It was a mix between power ballads and emo rock. “You should talk an
d feel it out. Trust me. If he likes you the way I think he does, it’s going to work out for you. Just know that you can talk to me at any time.”
“Thanks,” I said. I was excited to have plans with someone who wasn’t Clara and who wasn’t as difficult about Seth.
I glanced at my phone and Seth’s message once I made it back to the apartment, but I couldn’t let myself get too distracted from my studies, so I sent him one back to let him know I’d like that too, and maybe after our next practice would be a better time.
He didn’t respond back to me. My heart sank after waiting an hour. I guessed I’d messed up again.
Chapter 4
Seth
Practice was brutal, and I don’t mean running plays. After getting the brush off from Avery, I felt a sting when I saw her run by. I wanted to chase after her, but instead, I kept my ass in line with the others as we worked through some drills.
My coach was still going to expect me to leave Avery alone, but I just didn’t want to. I had to make her see that I was crazy about her—without making her think I was just plain crazy.
“Okay,” said Coach Carr. “Line up in three lines. Take it to the try line and back. I want to see you pass.” He put his whistle in his mouth and held it there as we lined up.
I started with the ball, and as I ran, I made a lateral pass and continued to run as the ball made its way back to me.
Avery ran by about that time, getting my attention, but I knew better than to miss the next pass coming my way. I caught the ball and kept it going, knowing we had one more set of passes until we had to stop.
“Don’t make the same throw every time,” Coach shouted. “Use your time to change it up.”
I tried to switch up to a backward pass, but when I threw the ball, it landed on the field.
My teammate, Mark Carver, immediately stopped to pick it up and tossed it to Montgomery, who everyone called Motor.
“What kind of fucking pass was that?” shouted Carver when we reached the line across the field from Coach Carr.
“He’s tripping over his dick again,” said Motor, throwing a glance back at Avery. “Can’t keep his head in it.”
“Fuck you.” I wasn’t going to take that crap. “Don’t blame your missed catches on me. I sent it right to you.”
“You’re going to fuck the season up if you don’t get her out of your head. I saw you in the parking lot with her yesterday. Planning another date?”
“So? What if I am?” Hearing them both complain had me wanting to see her even more. I wasn’t going to let anyone, especially those assholes, dictate who I saw and what I did. “That’s my business, isn’t it?”
“During the season, it’s all of our business.” Carver glared at me.
“Yeah?” I said. “So are you going to stop seeing Missy?”
“Things are going well with Missy and me. I don’t let my girlfriend get in the way of my game.”
“And things are good with Avery and me too.” At least they could be.
“For now. Until you cheat on her with one of your Omega House groupies. Everyone knows that’s the only reason you hang around there. To bum beer and steal all of the girls.”
“If they have a problem, they can tell me themselves.” No one had ever complained about me being there, and I had some really good friends who were Omegas.
Before it could get too heated, Coach Carr blew his whistle. “Okay, break up the girl talk, guys. Whatever problems you have, save it. I need you all working as a team.”
He didn’t care to find out what was going on or to take the blame for things being bad since he called me out about Avery in front of the entire team.
“We’re all good, Coach,” said Motor, who was giving me the stare-down as he walked back across the field where we started.
“Carver, next time, catch the pass,” said Coach. “Or else you can run.”
Carver walked away with a hard look on his face.
Coach glared at me. “Wipe that smug grin off your ugly mug. You should have given him a better throw.”
“You just said it was his fault.” He was always busting my ass.
“It was both of your faults. You’re a team. No one person ever gets the blame. You know that.”
“Yes, sir.” I jogged my way back over to the group and stood there, fighting the urge to look at Avery. I just wanted to see what she was doing and if she was looking at me. Before I could sneak a glance, Paul, who was a good buddy of mine on the team, glanced over and whispered. “Yeah, she’s checking you out in case you were wondering.”
I gave him a sideward look, and he shrugged.
“Not all of us think it’s fair he gets to dictate our love lives for the rest of the season,” said Paul.
Coach Carr blew his whistle again to end everyone’s idle chatter. “Now, listen up. I know you fools have run hundreds of passes like that in your games so far, but there’s still room for improvement. Let’s do it again until not a single ball is dropped. Do you think we can do that, girls?”
A collective “Yes, sir” was yelled.
“Get to it,” Coach said, blowing that fucking whistle. I wanted to punch it down his throat and make him sing like a bird.
I got in line again, this time with a different pair of partners, and things went a lot better. I didn’t drop the ball, and neither did they, but one of the other groups did. It was Motor who was overconfident, but Carver didn’t say shit to him.
“Fuckin’ pussy,” I mumbled.
“Yeah,” said Paul. “No shit. He’s gunning for your spot in case you didn’t know. I think he’s the one who said something to Coach about you and Avery.”
“Makes sense.” I spat on the field and wiped my sweat on my shirt. I used the moment to glance over at Avery, who was running passes of her own. She did it perfectly, and when she was down the line, she threw a glance over in my direction.
“One more time,” said the coach. “Other direction.” He blew the whistle and moved aside as we began, and once again, Motor dropped the ball, and he too blamed the miss on the thrower.
As Coach dealt with them, Motor’s face turned red, and when he caught me looking, I smiled.
Coach Carr wasn’t cutting him any slack, either. “Do you see what happens when you spend your time worrying about someone else’s business? You start to forget your place and your duties. Do you see what happens?”
“Yes, sir!”
“And you, Seth. This is your team. You need to encourage them better. Let’s get over here. You and Montgomery can run passes together. Work on his left lateral passes first. That’s his weak point.”
Motor didn’t look like he enjoyed hearing he had any weaknesses, and I sure didn’t like being dragged back into it with him. I was just trying to get through practice and often wondered why he’d wanted me to be the captain of the team in the first place.
All through practice, I stole glances, and when the girls let out twenty minutes before us, I didn’t think Avery would wait on me.
She hadn’t wanted to talk the night before, so I didn’t think she really wanted to give me the time of day. I shouldn’t have given her the brush off when she told me she wanted to talk. I should have listened to what she had to say. With the coach in my head, it was just hard to choose.
I didn’t want to let either of them down.
When I walked out to the Jeep, she was leaned against the bumper. Motor and Carver were standing on the other side of the lot, watching as I walked up and greeted her. “Hey,” I said. “I didn’t expect you still wanted to talk to me.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t expect a text last night.”
“You must have been busy.”
“I was.”
She had probably moved on to someone else and wanted to be the first to tell me. “I see. Well, it’s cool. I mean, Coach wants me to focus on the game, and I don’t have time for much else.”
“Oh, well, I was just studying for a big test, but the good news is, I think I passed
it.”
I immediately took back my words. “Cool, that’s good news. I thought you like moved on or something since I didn’t handle yesterday so good.”
“No, I’m not really that sought after,” she said with a giggle.
I heard an engine roar and glanced over to see Carver speeding away with Motor beside him.
“What’s their problem?” she asked.
“Just locker-room bullshit. Don’t worry about it.” I could handle those two, but I didn’t want her to worry about me. “Do you want to go out later?”
“I can’t. I have plans with Abi.”
“Abigail, huh?” I wasn’t sure if she was really going to hang out with her friend or if maybe she had a date. “I’d like to see you. Can’t you tell her you’d rather go with me?”
“I promised. I’m sorry. Another time?”
I couldn’t help but be disappointed. “Yeah, sure. I’ve got to keep my head in the game anyway. I’ll catch you later.” I walked to get in the Jeep, and she went around to her own car as I got in mine.
I didn’t bother looking her way, no matter how hard it was. I waited for her to drive away, and I punched the steering wheel so many times I’m surprised the airbags didn’t go off. I hated being told no, especially after I had put everything on the line to even talk to her. At least when Motor and his minion Carver went and told Coach I was seeing Avery, I could give him an honest answer—and just the one he wanted to hear.
I looked at my hand that had turned red, and one knuckle was beginning to bruise. I hated my temper, but I just couldn’t help myself sometimes. I knew I had to change and be better, but I also had to try everything I could to get Avery back.
I tried to think of how Layla would have told me to handle it. Action spoke louder, huh? I had to prove to myself that I was doing my best. Being patient was the first test.
Chapter 5