by Payton Reed
He didn’t believe that now, but he realized it wouldn’t matter if she had. Even if she came from the lowest scum of the earth, it was too late to change how he felt. Somewhere between his anger and resentment, an unexpected seed had blossomed, and he didn’t know how to stop loving her even if he’d wanted to.
Now he just had to figure out how to completely win and keep her. There was no way he was sharing her with Lex or Jonas, but maybe once she calmed down, they could have a more moderate discussion, where he obtained her agreement to end whatever she had going on with those losers.
He could be flexible about many things, and he’d make a much greater effort to prove he could be kind and loving. He only refused to share her. He wouldn’t lower his pride that far, even for the woman he loved.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Willow
What had she been thinking? She should have kicked him out of her room the moment she discovered him there. Never mind he hadn’t been amenable to the idea. All she’d had to do was scream, and it would have absolved her from blame for him being in her room. She shouldn’t have cared about his future or keeping him out of trouble.
She sure as hell shouldn’t have let him remove everything but her panties and rub himself against her until they both came. In the throes of her passion, she’d been tempted to take his cock out of his briefs and put it inside her. She’d been so close to doing that.
She couldn’t pretend whatever she had with Dalton was just an infatuation, or an attraction she could ignore. She couldn’t keep hiding the situation from Lex and Jonas after they’d forgiven her and were giving her another chance—a chance to be with both of them without having to choose.
As though the universe wanted to torture her, Kip sat beside her on the bench where she’d collapsed after a late-night, angst-filled walk by the lake after deciding she couldn’t stay in her room that still smelled like Dalton. And his cum. On her skin. She’d scrubbed the spot until it was raw, but she couldn’t scrub away that she’d let it happen.
“You shouldn’t be out here alone,” he said softly.
“I thought there was no curfew tonight?” She asked numbly, her mind not really on the conversation.
He put his hand across the back of the bench which made his fingers brush against her shoulder. “Not officially, but the dance has ended, and people are returning to their dorms. I’m on my way to my cottage.”
“Cottage?” She turned her head to look at him. “You live on the campus?”
He nodded. “I thought you knew.”
No, of course not, or she probably would have done something foolish, like tried to visit him. She shook her head. “That’s… convenient.”
“Or inconvenient, to live so close to temptation.” His fingers brushed against the back of her neck.
She was tired of pretending that she didn’t care and didn’t want him. After the night’s revelations with Lex and Jonas, she couldn’t hold back any longer. “Do you like me, Kip?”
His fingers faltered for a moment before they continued stroking. “Far more than I should.”
“I like you too. I want to be with you as much more than your student.” As he started to turn his body toward her, she put a hand on his thigh. “But I have to tell you something first.”
He stilled. “You want to tell me that you’re dating Lex, and it’s not just because you can’t have me, right?”
She stiffened, gasping. “How did…?”
Kip smiled, looking nonthreatened. “It’s obvious when you’re with him that he lights you up like I do, though maybe in different ways and for different reasons.”
She licked her lips. “Yeah, I care a lot about him. I also care about Jonas.” She wanted to tell him about Dalton, but she couldn’t find the words. How to explain the compulsion she felt with Dalton when their dynamic didn’t resemble anything like the respect and caring she had with Lex and Jonas… and maybe with Kip?
Kip let out an uneven exhalation and was quiet for a moment. “I haven’t seen you with him, but I’m not surprised. You seem to have a large capacity for love.”
She blinked. “And you aren’t bothered by the fact that I… care about other men as much as I care about you?”
He shrugged a shoulder. “Based on our previous discussion, I doubt it would shock you to learn I was once in a multi-person relationship. I cared a lot about her, and she cared about me. She cared about her other lovers too, so when I got this job after graduation, she couldn’t uproot their lives and hers to follow me to a conservative boarding school in rural Maine. It wasn’t true love we shared, but we had something special. I never felt like she cared less for me because of her other lovers.”
She swallowed, unable to imagine him being so open to the idea of sharing. “How many did she have?”
“Three, counting me. Veronica was amazing and so alive, and there was no way just one man could satisfy her. I don’t mean just sexually. She needed elements from each of us.”
Willow scowled. “She used you to make herself feel good.” There was some bitterness directed toward herself in the ugly words.
Kip scooted closer to take her hand. “No. She cared about each of us, just in different ways. It’s hard to describe, but do I really need to? You clearly care about more than one man, and I’m guessing too much to choose just one?”
She looked down, assailed by guilt. “It’s so wrong to do that to all of you.”
He shrugged. “If everyone knows and agrees, how is it wrong?”
Licking her lips, she looked up at him. “It’s wrong because I can’t handle any of you having another girlfriend besides me, but I want all of you to share me.”
“Love usually isn’t logical, Willow.” He squeezed her hand. “If that’s how you feel, and you make it clear those are your terms, then the men who accept know the way the relationship will be.” Leaning a bit closer, he whispered, “To clarify, I’m accepting the terms.”
She met his gaze, wanting so badly to kiss him. “I’m glad, but I still feel selfish.”
“So be a little selfish. I don’t think you are though. It’s not like you’re the only one getting benefit from the setup. We all get to have you too.”
She squeezed his hand. “You’re pretty amazing, Kip. I don’t feel like I’m worthy of you.”
He smiled. “Don’t feel that way. Please. Let’s just agree to see where this takes us… all of us.”
After a moment, she nodded. “I need to tell Lex and Jonas.” About Kip and Dalton. She should be telling Kip about Dalton too.
“Of course. Take all the time you need. It’s not like we can openly be together right now, anyway.” He grimaced. “And just so you know, I’ve never once crossed this line before. I haven’t even let myself feel attracted to a previous student, but there was no letting with you. It just happened, so fast and so strong I couldn’t stop it.”
She laid her head against his forearm, since she couldn’t reach his neck. “I think I already knew that.” She looked down at their twined hands. “Can we really make this work?”
He stroked his thumb over the top of her hand. “There’s only one way to find out. Just go for it.”
She lifted her head and scooted closer, brushing her mouth against his. The kiss was gentle and all too brief before he pulled away. She frowned in confusion. “Did I do something wrong?”
He shook his head as he put distance between them. “No, but Suzanne’s cottage is near mine. Who knows where that harpy is lurking?”
“Near yours? Which one is yours?” she asked casually.
Kip gave her a knowing look without answering. “Good night, Willow. Get to your dorm, where you’ll be safe.”
She wasn’t safe in there, not from her thoughts or Dalton, but she didn’t want to tell him that. Instead, she nodded and stood up. He was clearly waiting for her to start walking, so she said, “Good night, Professor.” It was hard to turn and walk away from him.
Almost as hard as trying to figure out
how to tell Lex and Jonas things had changed. Would they still be as accepting and accommodating? She dreaded finding out.
Part III
November
Chapter Twenty-Five
Jonas
The day seemed to go incredibly slowly for Jonas, but the mornings were often like that when he was expecting Willow for lunch. He was at the gazebo waiting for her when she showed up. He started to offer a cheerful greeting, but he held back at the look on her face. She approached slowly, taking the seat beside him as though she was afraid, he would reject her.
“What’s wrong?” He didn’t think it could be the incident that had happened during the Halloween dance a couple of days before. They had settled that, and he’d even danced with her a few times in his skeleton costume so he wouldn’t stand out as not belonging.
She bent her head, staring down at the bag in her hand without any sign of opening it. She let out a heavy sigh and crinkled the sack, but still didn’t do anything more with it.
Gently, he took it from her hand and started unpacking it for her. He set her sandwich and fruit on the bench between them. “Talk to me. Please?”
She lifted her head and bit her lip. “I have to tell you something. Something new since I saw you Friday night.”
He braced himself for something unpleasant based solely on her expression and her demeanor. “What is it?” He tried not to reveal any dread and maintain a neutral tone.
“There’s someone else I care about. I didn’t mention it Friday, because I had no idea if he really cared about me, or if it was all in my head.” She licked her lips, looking as though she was bracing herself for a fierce reaction.
Jonas breathed slowly, struggling to control his first impulse. He didn’t want to yell at her or come across as irrationally angry. Part of him felt betrayed and inadequate, but he tried to quell that response. He’d meant it when he told Lex that he thought she cared about him as much as he cared about her, even if she cared about Lex too. So, she could still care as much about him and another man too, along with Lex. Right? Struggling to keep a level tone, he asked, “Who is it?”
She looked around furtively and lowered her voice. “Kip.”
His eyes widened. “As in Kip Stuart, your professor?” His tone was a little shrill in his shock, and he quickly lowered his voice and calmed himself when she flinched. “It’s so dangerous for both of you. You could get kicked out, and he could lose his job.”
She nodded, biting hard on her lower lip. “I know. I know it’s a bad idea, but…” She shrugged. “I feel a connection with him, like I do with you and Lex.”
“It would be better to wait a few months until you graduate.”
She nodded. “I’m going to try, but I can’t promise. That’s why I wanted you to know right away. I still need to tell Lex too, but I only spoke with Kip the other night, after the dance. We both admitted how we were feeling. I swear there was nothing going on before then.”
He nodded. “I believe you. I’m not sure how I feel about this, but it’s mainly because I’m worried about you and him. If you get expelled, you won’t be able to see me either. Maybe that’s selfish.” He shrugged, deciding it probably was, but he wasn’t sorry for feeling that way.
She looked down again, her fingers pleating her skirt. “Is it a deal breaker for you if I can’t keep my distance from him?”
Jonas didn’t have to think over his answer. “No.” He reached over and took her hand, squeezing lightly. “I want to be with you. I know we didn’t get a chance to talk much after I found you with Lex. We only had time for dancing, but I really am okay with the arrangement. I don’t know if it’ll all work out, and if we can make this thing last, but I’m willing to try.”
She should’ve looked relieved, but instead, her expression darkened.
He frowned in confusion. “I thought you’d be happy to hear that.”
With a sigh, she nodded. “I definitely am, but there’s one more thing.” She was biting hard on her lower lip again.
He used his thumb to smooth the flesh from between her teeth, not wanting her to bite hard enough to bleed. He quickly dropped his hand to avoid having anyone see the overly familiar gesture. “What is it?” How much worse could it be? Judging from her reaction, it was on the par with the end of the world.
“It’s Dalton.”
He frowned, his ire rising on her behalf. “Your evil stepbrother? What’s he done to you now?”
She squirmed, looking visibly upset. “He likes me.”
“Like he’s getting over his bullying tactics?” He wasn’t surprised when she shook her head. “You mean he like likes you?”
She nodded. “He does. I hate him, but it’s…” Her lip went between her teeth again, and silence settled between them for a moment.
For his part, Jonas didn’t plan to offer speculation or theories. When it came to Dalton, she’d have to tell him everything herself, because he couldn’t guess or understand that dynamic. The last he knew, she hated Dalton, but judging from her conflicted expression, that had changed.
After a long pause, she took a deep breath before saying, “I’m attracted to him. I’ve kissed him and stuff, even though I know it’s stupid when I do it. He told me to drop you and Lex, because he doesn’t share.” She rolled her eyes. “I don’t know where he gets off trying to tell me what to do. I just don’t understand the whole situation between us.”
Neither did he. He certainly wasn’t going to try to interpret it either. He just shrugged a shoulder. “Does that mean you’re dating him too?”
She scowled. “I doubt if there’s any dating involved. And I won’t be with someone who expects me to turn my back on you and Lex… and now Kip. I just wanted to let you know the messed-up situation. I’ve decided I’m not going to keep anything else from you guys, even if it’s because I think it’s for your own good, or because I’m scared to tell you. I was lucky enough for you to forgive me, and I won’t put you both in that scenario again.”
His anger was stirring, but her last words managed to neutralize it. He let out a harsh exhalation, maintaining silence while he processed how he was feeling. Finally, he looked up and met her gaze, hating to see the anxiety there. “I’m not thrilled about him. He’s been mean to you, and he’s not worthy of you. But it’s not my place to tell you to steer clear, and I’m not going to put forth conditions to maintain our relationship. Whatever happens with him is between you and him. It’s the same with you and me. Whatever happens with us is between us, right?”
After a moment, she nodded. “I don’t know how long that can last though. There’s bound to be overlap at some point.”
Jonas couldn’t hide a small grimace at the idea of her other lovers overlapping into his life. except for Dalton, they were good guys, but he didn’t want to know about her love life with them or have them intruding into his time with her. It put him off, but it wasn’t enough to be worth turning away from her.
“We’ll handle that as it comes. I understand that if this is going to be a long-term thing, we’ll have to get comfortable with it and each other, but right now, everything is just new, and I’d rather you focus on you and me when we’re together. Can you do that?” Was he being unreasonable to ask her to do so? He didn’t think so.
She nodded eagerly. “I definitely can. I just wanted you to know. No more secrets, right?”
That was something he could get behind, and there was no hesitation when he smiled. “I think that’s a good policy.”
After a short silence, they started talking about nothing consequential, but it felt like the meaning of life was in every word she spoke. He reached over and casually took her hand, keeping it hidden between them on the bench, and they talked until the lunch bell rang. She got up quickly, looking around before pressing a light kiss against his mouth. “You’re so wonderful, Jonas.”
He snorted. “No, I’m not. I’m as normal as the next person. I can’t pretend I’m not jealous, but I can deal with it. I’m not
going to let it cost me a chance to be with you.”
She seemed on the verge of tears, and she blinked rapidly before taking a step back. “I’ll see you in a couple of days for lunch, okay?”
He nodded, wishing she could join him every day, but knowing they had to be discreet. As she started to walk away, he remembered something he’d planned to ask her. “Willow?”
She turned and walked back a few feet toward him. “Yeah?”
“Why don’t you get a pass this weekend and come visit me in Farley? You can meet my parents, and we can have some time alone.”
She nodded, looking just a little apprehensive. “I hope they like me.”
He didn’t have to ask who they were. She was clearly worried his parents wouldn’t like her. “It’ll be fine.” He couldn’t promise his mother would be as warm and welcoming as his father, but he knew his dad would like Willow. His mother would probably like her as well, but she’d be more worried about him dating another student. He hoped she wouldn’t assume Willow was like Stasia.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Willow
Willow wasn’t certain things had been settled completely positively with Jonas, but at least he hadn’t broken up with her or told her to pick him. He’d definitely taken the idea of Kip better than Dalton, and she couldn’t blame him. She’d done nothing but complain about Dalton, and for good reason.
She’d never hinted to him that there was another component to their interactions. Her news must have blindsided him, and she’d considered waiting to tell Jonas (and Lex) about Dalton, but she’d known immediately that was a bad idea. She was lucky that they’d been willing to give her a second chance after Lex and Jonas discovered she was dating both of them, and she wasn’t going to press her luck.