“And I won’t set your stuff on fire.”
“Even more brownie points in your favor.”
When she finally crawled out of bed, she stopped to look out the window. At least everything had pretty much thawed outside. Maybe tonight they’d be able to have dinner with Justin. She turned on the morning news to catch the weather, verified the Do Not Disturb sign was still out and that the deadbolt and security bar were both latched, and then hit the bathroom.
When she returned, Andrew wore a silly, playful grin and had the bottle of lube in one hand, and the paddle in the other. He was holding them up, offering one, then the other, back and forth, making her laugh. She was about to say something when her phone went off.
He frowned. “Okay, I’ll be glad to get home just so we can have coitus uninterruptis.”
It was Justin calling. “What’s up, bro?”
“I looked at the news and the roads are clear enough to drive on.”
“I just woke up a little bit ago, but yeah, looks like it.”
“I was thinking we could eat at that Mexican restaurant I really like up there. Paolo’s Cantina?”
“Sure. What time?”
When she finally got off the phone with him a few minutes later, she’d once again had the feeling there was a subtle current of subtext she was completely missing in her conversations with her brother.
Or, maybe he’d picked up on aspects of her dynamic with Andrew and he didn’t approve.
She really hoped that wasn’t the case.
Andrew had his head cocked to the side, studying her. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Dinner with him tonight.”
“Do you want to go alone? I’ll stay behind, if you’d like.”
“No. I want you there.”
“Then what’s wrong?”
“I don’t know. Maybe nothing. Maybe he’s just overwhelmed from the weekend. I don’t know.”
Rachel had heard yesterday via e-mail from one of the cousins that there wasn’t going to be a formal funeral for their aunt. Her attorney had piped up that her will specifically forbade one being held. She’d apparently left everything to one of the local animal shelters, which was already taking care of the animals she’d left behind upon her death.
Whatever was going on, the little nagging voice in her gut said something was up with her brother.
She just hoped it wasn’t something bad.
* * * *
They had spanking, then fucking, then a shower. She went down to the breakfast nook to fix them something to eat and bring back to the room while Andrew got started working and jumped on his first conference bridge call of the day.
She kept herself busy watching TV, reading her Kindle, and napping cuddled next to him.
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had time off like this, time off to just…relax. Even on her weekends, she usually had things to do, cleaning—something.
This was a nice problem to have, even if it had been forced upon her.
Andrew had offered to drive them to dinner, but she declined, just in case there might still be patches of ice on the road. They made it to the restaurant before Justin and were seated at a table by the time he arrived. Andrew insisted she sit on the other side of the booth so she could sit next to Justin.
His rationale was he got her all week, and then at home, so he was more than fine with her sitting next to her brother.
She thought they had a pleasant meal, although Justin seemed…withdrawn. Finally, when Andrew got up to go use the restroom, Justin leaned in close.
“Sis, are you okay?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, are you okay?”
“I’m not happy our flight got cancelled and Andrew and I are missing work, but yeah, I’m okay. Why?”
“That’s not what I mean.” He glanced in the direction Andrew had gone. “I mean, is he abusing you?”
Her eyes widened. “Huh?”
“I heard the way you were talking to him Saturday and Sunday. What the hell is going on? Do you need help? I can help you get away from him.”
She couldn’t help it. The giggles escaped her, and by the time Andrew had returned from the restroom, she was outright laughing so hard she could barely keep it quiet so that the rest of the diners didn’t stare at her.
As Andrew sat down, the confusion on both his face and her brother’s only made her laugh harder. It took her several minutes to compose herself, and once she finally did, she leaned in and hugged Justin, hard.
This wasn’t a conversation she’d wanted to have, but now that it was on the table, she’d have it and get it over with and pray her brother still loved her on the back side of it.
“Sweetie, you’re adorable. No, Andrew isn’t abusing me.” She glanced over the table at Andrew, to his arched eyebrow, and struggled not to burst out laughing again.
Focusing on her brother, she dropped her voice. “Before this trip, Andrew and I weren’t sleeping together, but we were good friends and play partners.”
“Play partners?”
“We’re kinky. You know, like Fifty Shades, only without the bullcrap and in real-life. He was my Top.” She looked at Andrew. “I guess now, after everything that’s happened this weekend, we’re boyfriend and girlfriend and still deciding what other labels to include in that mix.”
Andrew smiled at her, and that sight threatened to dampen her panties right there.
Why had she waited to pursue more with him, exactly?
Justin, however, seemed stunned into silence. She focused on him and forged on. “We both go to a BDSM club back in Sarasota. That’s how we met.”
“I thought you said you met through mutual friends?”
“We did. I just didn’t tell you those mutual friends were kinky friends. You never wanted to talk about relationships, remember?”
“Oh. Yeah.”
She plowed on. Now that it was out there, she wanted it all out there. “I like getting my ass spanked. Andrew likes spanking my ass. It works for both of us, and it’s all consensual.”
Justin still looked confused. “Um…uh-huh.”
“It’s okay. We both have a lot of friends in the lifestyle.”
“Lifestyle?”
“People who have similar…non-mainstream interests we have.”
“There’s…a club? What is this club? Like, what, a sex club?”
“No. Ironically, they don’t allow sex there.”
“Oh. Okay.” He still seemed confused and very deep in thought, so she didn’t interrupt him.
“So…you’re happy?” he asked.
She nodded. “Yeah. This weekend’s made me even happier. Are you okay?” She didn’t want to ask but forced herself to. “Does this make you want to not be around me?”
“What? No! I…” He looked from Andrew back to her. “If you want this, and you’re happy, okay. I’m fine with it.”
Relief filled her. “Obviously it’s not something we talk about with people who aren’t in the lifestyle.”
“Well, obviously. I get that. I won’t tell.” It took him a moment to speak again. “Do you know…gay people?”
Something about his tone really dug into her brain and held on. “I have gay friends, yeah. We both do. And straight, bi, cis, het, trans, mono, poly, swingers—just about every shade of the gender, sexual identity, and relationship rainbow. Why?”
She hoped her brother hadn’t turned into a raging homophobe in the years since she’d left South Dakota. Their parents had been very liberal, and she’d tried to instill those values in her little brother as much as possible while growing up.
Justin’s face turned a deep shade of red. His hands clasped together on the table in front of him and he apparently found them very interesting. “Does it bother you? What they do?”
She honestly wasn’t sure what the heck he meant. “Does it bother me what who does?”
Andrew reached across the table and laid a hand over Justin’s. “Neit
her one of us cares what anyone else does, as long as they’re doing it with consenting adults. Nothing you say or confess will shock us. If there’s something you’re trying to work up the courage to admit to us, believe me when I say it’s fine.”
Well, the tone Andrew had used shocked her. Gentle, kind, but lovingly firm.
Like he’d already adopted Justin as a little brother.
She stared at Andrew, not quite sure why she felt Andrew had just grokked something she was still missing.
Justin took a deep breath and whispered, “So it wouldn’t bother you if I admit I’m gay?”
Her eyes widened. “What?”
Andrew didn’t let go of his hands, though. “No, not in the slightest.”
When Justin finally looked at her, the tears in his eyes broke her heart. “What about you, sis?”
She threw his arms around him, and he pulled his hands free to hug her back. “Baby bro, I don’t give a shit if you’re gay or straight. Long as you’re not, you know, molesting children or animals or dead people, I honestly don’t care. Is that what you wanted to talk to me about the other day?”
“Yeah.” He clung to her like he was drowning, desperate. “I was so scared you’d be mad.”
“Why would I be mad?”
“I don’t know. I just…I haven’t told anyone else about it. Just you two.”
“Is this why you always avoided the topic when I asked how you were doing, if you were dating anyone?”
“Yeah,” he quietly admitted. “Tom—my roommate—he doesn’t even know. I was scared to let anyone find out.”
She finally made him look at her. “Jus, you’re my baby brother. I want you to be happy. Are you dating anyone now? Did you keep someone hidden because you were afraid to introduce them to me?”
He shook his head. “No. I kind of saw a guy last year for a couple of months, but I was so busy with my studies and my thesis that I couldn’t deal with it then, so I broke it off. He was in the closet, too, and we were both scared someone might find out. We never even slept together.”
She pulled him in for another hug. “I love you. You being gay is nowhere on the really freaking short list of things that would shock me or make me stop loving you, okay? Seriously.”
He started crying, her heart breaking for him. “I’ve missed you so much. I was so scared to tell you. I was afraid you might not want me anymore.”
She held on tight, wishing she could afford to just move him to Florida with her right that moment. “You knew I had gay friends in college. Why would you think that would bother me?”
“I don’t know.”
She felt a tap on her shoulder. Andrew had reached across the table with a handful of napkins, which she gratefully accepted and pressed into Justin’s hands.
“Okay,” she said. “You haven’t heard anything yet from any of the jobs you applied for, right?”
“Right.”
“Then why don’t you come to Florida for a vacation of your own after your job ends here? You can stay with me, we’ll introduce you to our friends, and you can chill out. What do you say?”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“My treat,” Andrew firmly added. “I’ll buy your ticket.”
When she looked across the table at him, he had an eyebrow arched at her, making her smile.
“Thank you, Sir,” she softly said.
That drew a smile from him. “You’re very welcome, pet.”
* * * *
Justin still had a couple of weeks at his current job before he could come visit, so that worked out well. While they sat there, Andrew pulled up the airline’s app on his phone and booked Justin’s flight for him.
Rachel felt a weird sense of déjà vu sweep over her.
“We’ll come pick you up at the airport,” Andrew told him after e-mailing him the flight info.
“Thank you,” he said, still clutching Rachel’s hands in his. “I can’t tell you how much this means to me.”
“Well, if none of those jobs pan out for you,” Andrew said, “how about you move down to Florida and start looking there? Lots of hospitals and universities and stuff. You could probably find a job down there easily.”
“I’ll think about it. I’d like to see if I hear anything back from where I applied first.”
“There’s nothing keeping you here, right? That is, if I understood Rachel correctly.”
“You’d be okay with me moving down there?” Justin asked.
“Why wouldn’t I?” Andrew asked. “You’re her brother.”
“Heck, you could move in with me for a while,” Rachel said. “I mean, my place is small, but I have a sleeper sofa.”
“Or he can stay with me,” Andrew offered. “I have a spare bedroom and plenty of room. Or, you can move in with me, and he can live at your place.” When he smiled at her, she smiled back.
“I still can’t believe you’re being so cool about this,” Justin said.
“Why would you think I wouldn’t be?” she asked.
Justin shrugged. “I guess I’ve been around this group up here for too damn long. First couple of years away at college were almost like a vacation. I didn’t have to feel like I had to watch every little thing I said or did, but the more I paid attention, the more I realized that I still couldn’t be me. No matter where I went, someone either knew Uncle George and Aunt Karen, or I was related to them somehow.”
“Give serious thought to it, all right?” Andrew asked. “If the expense is an issue, I’ll pay for a moving truck for you.”
“I appreciate that, but I’ll figure out the money somehow. It’s not like I have a lot to move. I’m sharing an apartment with my friend, Tom. A lot of the furniture is his. I have the stuff in my bedroom, a little bit from the kitchen, and a few bookshelves. Plus I still have a couple of pieces that were Mom and Dad’s in the storage unit.”
“Even better,” Rachel said.
He let out a sad sigh. “Do you think Mom and Dad would be ashamed of me?”
“No!” She pulled him in for another hug. “They weren’t like that. Not at all. They’d be as damned proud of you as I am for getting your degree. You worked your ass off.”
Justin excused himself to the bathroom. When he returned a couple of minutes later, he’d cleaned himself up and pulled himself together before sliding back into the booth with them.
“Sorry I’m so emotional today.”
“It’s okay,” Andrew said. “I know this has been a tough time for you. It’s got to be hard missing your parents, and then all the other stress.”
He nodded. “Yeah. Exactly.”
Rachel decided if she hadn’t been “in love” with Andrew before, she definitely was now.
After the weekend they’d just survived, the fact that Andrew wasn’t running for the door and screaming in fear proved he just might be tough enough to handle her and her issues.
Which, when she thought about what she’d been through, and how reasonably well-adjusted she was compared to many of the whackadoodles in her family, maybe she wasn’t as bad off as she’d always thought she was.
* * * *
“Thank you for being so patient about all of this,” Rachel said on the ride back to the hotel later.
Andrew focused on her. Since she was driving, he could watch her. “Why wouldn’t I be patient?”
“It’s just…a lot. Then to buy his ticket for him, I can’t tell you how much that means to me.”
“Hey, I didn’t have a little brother growing up. Now I have an adopted one. I’m cool with that.”
She smiled, and he knew he wanted to keep her smiling like that for the rest of their lives together.
“I thought he wanted to tell me something the other day, but this wasn’t what I thought it’d be.”
“I kind of had a feeling,” Andrew said.
Her head snapped around. “What?”
He shrugged. “Just a feeling. A hunch.”
“I had no idea he was gay.�
��
“See, I’d never met him before. I was viewing him with much different eyes than you. Just leave it that my Dom senses were tingling.”
“You think he’s a sub?”
“I’d be willing to bet on it. And when he’s down there for vacation, let’s pencil in some time to introduce him around. Glen and Wade, Leo and Jesse, Reed and Lyle, Cody and Justin, Landry. All the others.”
“Why, because they’re Doms?”
“No, because they’re gay.” He thought about it. “Well, some of them are kinda sorta gay. It gets confusing to keep everyone straight.”
She snorted. “Pun intended?”
“Oh. Heh. Yeah, really.”
“Let’s not let Landry play with him, though.”
“Well, not exactly our call, pet, but why?”
“He’s a fucking sadist.”
“So am I.”
“He’s a tough fucking sadist.”
“I thought you liked Landry?”
“I do,” she said. “I love him to pieces. He’s amazeballs. He and Cris topped me once before I met you.”
“Once?”
“Nice enough guy, but he plays out of my league. I could tell he was really holding back with me. That made me uncomfortable, because I was afraid he wasn’t enjoying it.”
“I’ve never known Landry to violate a safeword.”
“Oh, he didn’t. I didn’t even have to call yellow. I trust him totally. That’s not even my point, though. I’ve seen him play with others and while I enjoy watching him play, I spent the first part of my scene with him wondering if I was going to have to safeword, and the second half of it worried that he wasn’t having a good time because he was holding back. I never dropped into subspace, either.”
“Ah.” Having seen the trio play, and having seen both Cris and Tilly bottom to Landry and each other, he grokked what she meant.
Landry as a sadist made him look like a pussy.
They arrived at the hotel. Before she shut the car off, he reached over and laid his hand on her arm. “Don’t ever worry about hurting my feelings in a scene,” he told her. “Tell me to go harder, tell me to ease up. I don’t want to be worried about you worrying about me.”
Beware Falling Ice Page 15