by CK Dawn
Emma flew through her bedroom door and locked it before collapsing on her bed. Her own anger, fear, and disbelief all fought to be acknowledged as she tried in vain to block everything out, including her own emotions. Her anger won momentarily as she got up and knocked things off her dresser, looking for her mother’s letter. How could you leave me, Mom? I need you! Then she saw the corner of the dusty envelope peeking out below her dresser. She picked it up and tore into it. Blinking away her tears slowly, Emma focused on her mother’s words.
Dear Emma,
Oh my darling girl I love you so much! If you’re reading this then something has happened to me. I’m so sorry to have left you so soon. Just know that I am proud of the young woman I know you are becoming and that I love you more than anything.
I have to admit, I don’t like having to write this letter, but it is necessary. I’ve already seen some changes in you that you are probably starting to realize aren’t normal, but, my darling girl, they are as natural to us as breathing. I guess, since you’re reading this, I haven’t told you about the King’s Court yet. I’m guilty of wanting to give you a normal life for as long as I can. So it’s okay to be mad at me, honey, just don’t be scared, it’s perfectly normal and everything is going to be alright. I just wish I could be there to comfort you.
A noise coming from outside startled Emma. She looked up from her Mother’s letter to her bedroom window. Mattox was on her fire escape crouching at her window. Emma shook her head trying to keep her emotions buried. “I don’t think I can do this,” she said to the locked window.
Mattox stood outside with a pleading, yet sorrowful look. He was the most adorably miserable looking supermodel puppy she had ever seen. She let out a laughing cry as she walked to the window, unlatching it. Mattox entered, sat down beside her, and grabbed her hand. “Yes, you can. I’m right here. You need to feel your own emotions, Emma, it’s important.” All of a sudden Mattox didn’t seem like a void of space anymore. With the touch of his hand Emma felt a surge of warmth and kindness radiate into her body. It mingled with something else, he felt for her rose above his other emotions and she blushed. He tried to hide his affection and focus on the more benign emotions, but part of him didn’t want to, part of him wanted to scoop her up and claim her as his own. The thought made Emma’s heart pound hard and fast. Emma was falling for Mattox too. She had been ever since he stepped through her classroom door and smiled at her. She let that feeling come to the surface and pushed it into Mattox.
He smiled that same warm sincere smile and bent down and kissed her. His lips were full and soft against her own like she knew they would be. With a breath, Emma let a little moan escape her lips and Mattox kissed her harder. With the kiss came more emotions, everything from love and regret to sorrow and joy filled her.
She pulled away suddenly. “Why regret?” she asked
Mattox shook his head and sighed. “I’m doing this all wrong. I wasn’t supposed to fall for you, but I can’t hide the way I feel.”
“Then don’t.” Emma touched the red welt on his cheek left by the netherwalker and touched her lips to his, almost demanding to be kissed. She flooded him with her desire. He answered her back with a wave of his own passion and deepened their kiss. His hands went around her waist, pulling her closer, and her arms instinctively went around his neck. An almost feral rumble resonated in his chest as his hands began to explore her body. Just then, her mother’s letter crinkled in her hand and Mattox pulled away to look at her.
Mattox looked at the letter in her hands. “Emma, I’m sorry.”
“Maybe this is why they sent you. Whoever they are,” Emma shook her head back and forth leaning against his forehead. “I’ve buried my emotions for so long, I don’t think anyone else could have gotten them out of me.” She looked down at the half read letter. “Will you stay with me tonight?”
Mattox looked at her bedroom door and opened his mouth to protest but Emma cut him off.
“It’s locked,” she blushed. “I want to be alone with my mom’s words without everyone’s emotions getting in the way, if only for a little while. Can you keep them out and then let me fall asleep in peace? I’m exhausted. Ju- just hold me?” she asked shyly.
“That I can do,” he said, kissing her forehead. “Tomorrow I’ll start teaching you how to shut them out yourself.”
“Really?” her exhaustion was averted for a millisecond as Mattox snuggled in behind her as the big spoon.
“I should have said this a while ago,” he said, nuzzling her ear sending shivers down her spine. “Welcome to the King’s Court, Emma.” He consciously sent her feelings of contentment as he ran his fingers down her arm.
“Hey, that means your emotions, too. No cheating,” she teased.
“Sorry,” his breath tickled her neck. “But, tomorrow you’re all mine.”
“And the next day?” she asked hopefully.
“And the day after that, and the day after that,” he smiled against her skin.
Emma snuggled into his embrace and sighed deeply as he created a cocoon of silence around her. “The King’s Court?” She asked.
Mattox chuckled and whispered, “Keep reading.”
The changes you’re experiencing are quite normal for us, honey, from where we come from. From the moment you were born you were able to pick up on other people’s emotions and comfort them. I think you’re meant to be a shepherd, like me.
Emma began to cry and Mattox squeezed her gently. She let her own emotions flow freely and finished her mother’s letter with a new sense of peace, understanding, and closure.
We come from a long line, descendants of Camelot and the Knights of the Round Table. It’s crazy, I know, but true. Search your feelings and you’ll know it’s true. There are secrets in this world that most people (we call dociles) don’t know about. Secrets such as creatures called netherwalkers that feed on human emotions for their masters in the Netherworld. Secrets such as Guardians, members of the King’s Court that defend our realm, keeping the netherwalker threat at bay. I hope you never come across one of these creatures, honey, but know that there are hunters everywhere defending us from them. I was a shepherd in the King’s Court until I met your father, and yes, he’s a docile. Shepherd’s guide neophytes (unknowing descendants like yourself) into the court. I never told your father my secret, as it wasn’t mine alone to tell and I never felt the need to share the secrets until I had you. I chose to become a sleeper within the King’s Court, only becoming active if needed, choosing to live a docile life with you and your father instead. Every day with you both has been a blessing and I wouldn’t have changed a thing. Hopefully by now the Court will have sent a shepherd to guide you in and prepare you for your gloaming bond. You can trust them, honey, they are good people. Your gloaming bond will explain almost everything to you instantly and I regret that I won’t be there to physically experience it with you. But during your bond, you’ll sense me and all our other ancestors that came before us and know we will always be with you. I know this is a lot to take in, but don’t hide from your emotions, embrace them, honey. They are so much a part of who you are meant to become. I’m so proud of you!
Love always,
Mom
Emma was quiet for a very long time. She took her mom’s advice and allowed herself to feel. Emma cried while Mattox held her, shielding her from all other emotions but her own. They remained that way for a very long time.
“You’re a, uh, a shepherd?” she asked in a quiet voice.
“Yes,” a hushed voice behind her answered back.
“And that man and woman, they’re hunters?” Emma asked through an uncontrollable yawn. Sleep threatened to take her soon but the new world opening up to her had her intrigued.
“Yes, and I’ll explain everything tomorrow, but right now you need to rest,” he rubbed the skin on her arm gently, lulling her to sleep. “Tonight you’re just Emma, I’m just Mattox, and I’m yours.”
“Mhmm,” she replied, liking the sound of that.
“Goodnight, Mine.”
Mattox chuckled, “Goodnight, Mine.” He seemed to focus and shut everything down for her. Pure silence greeted her and sleep came easily for the first time in months.
†
Mattox looked so peaceful Emma hated to wake him, but she wanted answers and couldn’t wait any longer. She got out of bed and padded toward her window and pulled the curtains open flooding her bedroom in sunlight. Mattox stretched contently then must have realized where he was as he went perfectly still and popped his eyes open.
“Crap! What time is it?” he whispered.
“Will it hurt?” Emma asked, ignoring his question.
“Your father killing me when he finds me here? Probably,” he whispered.
“He’s already gone to work and it’s not like we did anything anyway.” She rolled her eyes, “I meant my gloaming bond, silly.” Mattox reached out and pulled her back into bed kissing the back of her neck, but Emma was unrelenting, “Want some breakfast?”
Mattox groaned, “Ugh! You’re a morning person aren’t you?”
“Right now, I’m an, I need-answers person.” Emma rolled over and faced Mattox, “And training. I don’t want to be hunted by one of those things ever again.”
“Alright,” he groaned again. “That’s understandable, but please tell me you have coffee?”
Emma gave him a mischievous smile, “My dad is the guru of coffee. Come on, you’re in for a treat.”
†
“No, the gloaming bond doesn’t hurt,” Mattox stated sipping on the cappuccino Emma had made him from her father’s industrial looking coffee machine. Even though he wasn’t a morning person he won extra brownie points for remembering and answering her question from earlier. Mattox had insisted on making her breakfast once she started grinding coffee beans, frothing milk, and pulling ground cinnamon and vanilla extract from the cabinet. He took another sip of her barista worthy concoction with a contented sigh and began whisking some eggs. Emma watched in awe as he expertly added mushrooms, garlic, and spinach cooking them all down before adding his heavenly smelling stewed tomatoes, pancetta, and cheese to the pan and placed the entire frittata into the oven. “It’s, well, it’s hard to describe. You’ll be connected to us.” He chuckled, “My brother actually describes it like being a human computer, downloading centuries of mega data in a matter of minutes. Most Neophyte’s say it’s a pretty cool experience, since they had no previous knowledge of guardian history. And your chosen path, which seems to be a shepherd will be declared.”
Emma giggled, “Kind of like the sorting hat?”
“Something like that, you Potter nerd,” he teased.
“The rainy day in the cab. Why was I drawn to the Vaughn building?”
“So you did feel it then?” Mattox asked and Emma nodded. “It’s home to hundreds of guardians and our headquarters here in New York. Bernie thinks you didn’t answer the gloamings call and find us on your own because the pull most neophyte’s feel was dulled by all the emotions from dociles you’ve had to weed through.”
“Bernie?” Emma asked.
Mattox laughed, “Pretty much the coolest guy on the planet and he just happens to be my mentor.”
Emma tugged on her bottom lip with her teeth. Mattox was so damn sexy standing barefoot in her apartment wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans like something out of a magazine, she could barely stand it. “And what about us? Will there be an Us afterwards? The Court isn’t going to say no fraternizing or anything lame like that are they?”
Leaning against the kitchen counter, Mattox smiled and pulled Emma closer. “No, nothing lame like that,” he gave her a sly grin and kissed her on the lips. Tracing kisses up her neck he paused at her ear, “I will have to okay it with my three wives though.”
Emma pulled away and chucked him in the arm. “You better be kidding.”
“I am,” he pulled her closer, “I only have one wife.”
She slugged him again. “Mattox!”
“Ouch, okay, I’m totally kidding. Are you sure you aren’t a hunter? You pack a pretty good punch.”
“Like your friends? No thanks, if I never see another one of those, uh, krims again it’ll be too soon.” Emma kept physical contact with Mattox enjoying the silence he brought to her mind. She looked at him with watery eyes as the impact of what she was thinking about doing hit her. “What about my dad?”
“He’s your family, Emma, of course he’ll be brought in. You can even have him join your bonding ceremony. Being a shepherd you can actually share the experience with him even though he’s a docile. Would you like me to show you?” Mattox intertwined their fingers and held her gaze.
Emma nodded, thinking of how Mattox had told her that during her gloaming bond she’d relive the Court’s history through its descendants that had moved on. His hands went around her waist and Emma hugged his neck tight as she asked her next question, “Will my mom be there?”
He squeezed her waist and wrapped his arms around her completely. “Somewhat. It’s sort of like an after image of her memories, so in a sense, yes.”
After a long time still in his embrace, she let out a contented sigh enjoying his hug and the silence, “Mmm. I could get used to this.”
“Me too.” He said, pulling her even closer.
Emma thought about how she would broach the subject to her dad. It was a lot to take in, even for her, and she was the one experiencing it. She gave a little giggle as she thought of something. Her belly and chest moved with each bout of silent laughter.
“What’s gotten into you, giggle worm?” Mattox teased, pulling away so he could look at her.
“Can you have one of those hunters come over for an orb demonstration for my dad?” She chuckled again and was only half joking.
“Trying to figure out how to tell him everything?”
Emma nodded and he kissed her gently, “I’m here if you need me, Em, always.”
The kiss and his term of endearment sent shivers up and down her body. “I know,” she said, but she wanted to talk to her dad alone, at least at first. So she decided to put her mother’s letter out with his morning coffee tomorrow so they could have a nice little chat about dociles and dragons.
Emma wrapped her arms around Mattox and hugged him tight. She enjoyed the feel of the curves in his body and how she fit into them. She let out another contented sigh. “Can this be part of my training? I mean, I need to practice right?” she said with mock coyness.
The timer on the oven rang and Mattox gave Emma a quick soft peck then looked at her with his sly sexy smile. “Time to eat up. We’ve got a lot of work ahead of us.” He grabbed her waist and tugged her closer as he started kissing her neck. “I think,” he said, moving his kisses to her shoulder, “You’re going to need,” he pulled the strap of her cami to the side, “Lots and lots more practice.”
†
The intercom buzzed at Emma’s front door and Mattox’s voice came over the box, “You ready for school, Emma the Fair and Brave?”
Emma rolled her eyes knowing he couldn’t see her, but wondered if he was able to sense her eye roll. She walked over to the door and pushed the button, “I’ll be right down, jeesh.”
Emma placed her dad’s coffee on the kitchen counter next to the morning paper and added one more item, her mother’s letter. She placed the corner of it underneath his #1 Dad mug and knocked on his bedroom door. “Dad, there’s something on the counter I’d like you to look at. I’ll talk to you about it today after school okay?”
Robert opened his door and peered out. “Is everything okay, honey?”
“Everything is actually great.” She looked at her father in a new light. It hadn’t been his fault that she was assaulted with his grief day in and day out. He was doing the best he could and outwardly he always appeared strong for her. “I love you, dad.”
“I love you too, honey. Have a good day.” He smiled brightly.
“I think I will,” she smiled sincerely and for the fi
rst time, she knew she would have a good day.
†
“Are you sure you want to transfer to S.B.? You know you can always stay here at Jefferson,” Mattox teased as they walked down the street.
“And miss out on the real history of Lancelot and King Arthur? No way!”
“Have you told your dad yet?” Mattox quizzed her.
“I left him my mom’s letter. I figured I’d ease him into it with the whole ‘hey I’m not really a normal human’ first, then drop the school transfer bombshell on him, topped off with the dessert of ‘oh by the way there’s a million dollar condo in the Vaughn with our name on it.’ Yeah, I’m thinking that’s the best plan of attack,” she laughed.
Mattox chuckled and kept his voice down, “So, did you really want me to bring over a hunter for an orb demonstration?”
“Ha! I’ll keep you posted.” Emma sighed as they got closer to school, “How much longer do I have to go to Jefferson anyway?” She would miss Mel, but promised herself to keep in touch with her friend.
“Today can be your last day if you like.”
Emma stared up at Mattox in shock, “Seriously?”
“It’s all been taken care of.”
“Crap, I still need to explain my absence Friday!” she remembered.
“That’s been handled too,” Mattox gave her a sinful smirk.
“Did you do all that?” she smiled.
“I know a guy, who knows a guy,” he said, trying to pull off an innocent shrug.
They were almost to the front doors of Jefferson High and Emma’s emotions were swirling, trying to make room for themselves amongst all the invading whispers surrounding her. “Mattox?” Emma pleaded.
“You can do it. I’m right here.” Mattox placed his hand on the small of her back, but barely shielded her from the cacophony of white noise in her head.
Emma’s breathing was sporadic and her heart was racing as she tried to gain control. No hoodie, no earbuds to fall back on, this challenge was all up to her to conquer on her own, Mattox had insisted. This morning Emma had actually fixed her long chocolate locks and put on a little lip gloss. She even felt pretty for once. The lip gloss hadn’t lasted long however. As soon as Mattox had seen her he kissed it away. “Mmm, cherry. My favorite. You’re in trouble,” he’d stated, kissing her longer and harder. Emma’s heart began pumping even faster from the memory of those kisses as emotional echoes flew at her from every direction. She wiped her sweaty palms on her jeans.
Mattox whispered in her ear as students gawked at the new couple. “Relax! It’s like you’re trying to breathe air, but you’re underwater.”
“Exactly!” she hissed.
“Emma? There is no water. Just breathe.”
A sonic boom echoed in her ears and then everything went silent. Mattox walked around to face her and was smiling. She hadn’t even realized that he wasn’t touching her anymore.
Mattox nodded and mouthed something. “Can you hear me?” She shook her head no and he laughed. He took a hold of her hand and tried again. “How about now?”
“Yes,” she sighed. “Well that was different.”
“Look at you skipping over lessons. You’re a quick study. Now just let people’s external voices through. Your mind and body will remember, it’s almost like muscle memory or neural pathways you forgot were there.” He let go of her hand.
Emma thought about something simple, like what it felt like to blink and slowly her ears picked up voices all around her. As an experiment she shut everything down again like putting part of her mind to sleep. All sounds, external and internal ceased. “Well that’s a neat trick!” She yelled. Realizing what she’d done she turned the volume on everyone’s voices back up to normal.
“Isn’t it?” Mattox beamed, uncaring about others’ reaction to them.
“What do we do now?” Emma looked around at her schoolmates and actually smiled for the first time in months.
“Be normal teenagers and go to class,” he shrugged.
Emma rolled her eyes, “Ugh, do we have to?” But she was ecstatic at how normal she felt and didn’t really care what they did as long as they were together. As one of the boys that had been particularly cruel to her walked into view Emma gave Mattox a devious smirk. Patrick had always made it a point to mock her appearance in front of his friends, drawing a lot of unwanted attention and emotions Emma’s way. High school in general was bad enough, but to be bullied when you’re down and unable to fight back, was one of the worst things in the world.
“No experimenting on dociles.” Mattox whispered.
“Oh, come on. I promise to use my superpowers for good and not evil.” Over exaggerating she batted her eyelashes at him and he rolled his eyes. “Okay, maybe just a little evil,” she stated truthfully.
Emma sat in her usual seat with a new found confidence. Mattox brushed his hand along her arm before taking his seat in the back of Mrs. Blake’s class. His touch sent goosebumps up Emma’s arm and her cheeks flushed. Since Mattox’s physical contact wasn’t focused on helping her control the emotions surrounding her anymore the contact was purely sensual and intoxicating.
The cruel boy, Patrick, entered the doorway shoving his football buddies playfully but still demonstrating his testosterone dominance over them as well. He took his seat right beside Emma, but instead of sneering at her he actually looked embarrassed and turned away from her. Emma scrunched her eyebrows together and finally realized what had changed. No longer was she hidden by her hood and stringy brown hair covering her face. She was all rosy cheeked and sparkly eyed. Emma pierced through the silence and listened to Patrick’s emotions. He was focused in on Emma’s sexual confidence. Ugh! You’ve actually been attracted to me this whole time and were ashamed about it because of the way I looked? Why don’t you just pull my hair already! What are you twelve? She was disgusted. Patrick needed to learn a hard lesson on how to treat girls and not give a damn about what his friends might think. Emma laughed at her own pun. Hard. Oh yeah!
Emma took her lip gloss out of her bag and pouted her lips as she applied it. She swept her hair off her shoulder towards Patrick making sure he got a big whiff of her cherry lips and lavender scented loose waves. She looked back and giggled at Mattox as he raised his eyebrow disapprovingly. She shrugged and turned her attention back to her prey. With all her might she pushed the sexual energy she felt for Mattox towards Patrick and let out a little seductive sigh.
The footballer squirmed in his seat and reached for his textbook. “Um, Mrs. Blake.”
He rushed to put the book in his lap, but not before Emma saw the growing bulge in his pants. “Oh, Patrick!” she teased.
Students privy to what was happening giggled as Patrick jumped out of his chair dropping the book from his lap as he bolted to the front of the class. He made excuses on his way out the door, “Mrs. Blake, I’m sorry, I uh, don’t feel very--” but everyone saw the enormous bulge he couldn’t hide.
The class erupted in laughter before he could disappear into the hallway.
“Oh, Rick! Oh!” his teammates said in unison. “Loser!”
Mattox cleared his throat and Emma sent him an emotional eye roll. He chuckled out loud and sent her an emotional ‘tsk tsk’ back. But, she wasn’t done yet. There was one more person she wanted to see and this time she would use her powers for good and not evil.