by Ian Rodgers
Chronicles of a Royal Pet
Of Scales and Distant Shores
Ian Rodgers
Text Copyright ©2018 Ian Rodgers
All Rights Reserved
This story is dedicated to those who never give up and continue to strive towards their goals.
Table of Contents
Chapter 1: Sickness of the Sea
Chapter 2: Fate Foreshadowed
Chapter 3: Turning of the tides
Chapter 4: Arrival
Chapter 5: Like a thief in the night
Chapter 6: Jewels and Tomes
Chapter 7: The Wide-Open Emperor
Chapter 8: Arrival and recognition
Chapter 9: A little piece of Haven
Chapter 10: Adventures in a new land
Chapter 11: The drums of war
Chapter 12: Body building
Chapter 13: Scales, hugs, and futures
Chapter 14: Night of Hatred
Chapter 15: Plans and preparation
Chapter 16: City of scales
Chapter 17: A duel against the Void
Chapter 18: Goddess of Love
Chapter 19: Escape and plans
Chapter 20: Preparing for war
Chapter 21: Battlefields and Promises
Chapter 22: When life goes on
Chapter 1: Sickness of the Sea
Life is truly full of surprises and interesting, new experiences. I, for instance, had never set foot on a boat until that spring.
As such, it was a novel experience to suffer sea sickness without possessing any of the internal organs necessary for it. That is to say, it was as much fun as getting into a fight with an Urdrai.
Upon discovering this bizarre, out-of-place ailment, I chose to spend my time hanging around the mast, either reclining against it as if it were a tremendous, bare tree or lying beside it, trying to keep my body in its humanoid shape.
And that was the only reason I chose the mast as my relaxing spot. Certainly not because I was terrified of the salty spray splashing against me and causing my gelatinous body to shrivel up like a dried prune under the sun.
Ah, the trials of a Royal Ooze! I was a creature made of solidified magic, born from the Wild Mana that permeated this world. But I was more than that. Much, much more. I had a soul, for one thing, and mind to go along with it. All of which were courtesy of my owner, the Princess of Varia, Liliana Augustine Roan.
Chosen as a pet on a whim, her magic had sparked a reaction within me, and now I was aware of myself, and my surroundings. I could never pay her back for such a gift, so I’d chosen to dedicate my life to hers.
That decision led me to saving her from assassins, attending a magical school with her, and then saving her from a kidnapping. Honestly, one thing after another with my owner!
That last incident was why I was now on a boat, headed for Drakon. The people sent after Liliana were actually after me, although they hadn’t known that at the time. All because of some thrice damned prophecy that slapped me with the title of ‘Chosen One’ and a target on my back for being destined to stop evil and whatnot.
I clenched my ‘fists,’ thinking of all the trouble I’d been put through because of this, and all the dangers the people I cared about had had to brave thanks to indiscriminate attacks on my life.
Eventually, I let the anger bleed away. It did me no good to get upset. Especially while I was seasick on a ship in the middle of the Bluestar Ocean.
At the moment, I was leaning against the mast, looking rather like a dashing rogue, if I do say so myself. This opinion was scoffed at by two voices in my head. I politely ignored their opinions. I knew I looked good.
The hems of my robe flapped in the breeze, giving me the appearance of a skinny, waddling bird. I wore a dark shade of blue, instead of traditional black for my mage robes, with dark brown boots and gloves hiding my less than solid appendages. In addition, I wore a big, floppy black pointed hat atop my ‘head.’
The only real color that stood out on my body was a silver medallion around my neck, an emblem with a crossed sword and mage’s staff. The mark of the Adventurer’s Guild. And the badge signified I was a C-rank adventurer. Not quite a veteran, but certainly stronger and better trained than the average person.
“You doing alright, there, Jellik?” a concerned voice asked from somewhere around my waist. I bent my ‘head’ down and made my illusory face smile at the person standing next to me.
“Just fine, Katherine. Why do you ask?”
A dwarf woman frowned back up at my response, and folded her arms.
“Well, you’ve hardly budged from that spot all day. And it’s only been three days since we set sail.”
I sagged a bit at the reminder.
“I have sea sickness, Katherine. Sea sickness! How?! Why?!” I threw my arms into the air. “Until I figure this out and sort it out, I’m not moving around. Lest I spit up the contents of my ‘stomach.’ And I’d rather not have to answer any questions like ‘why did you throw up a bunch of coins?’ Or, ‘that vomit looks an awful lot like a Healing Potion!’ See my problem?”
“Yeah, I suppose I can understand that,” the dwarf said with a sympathetic wince. “It’s really weird though. You barf up stuff you’ve stored in your dimensional storage instead of the last thing you ate, so maybe this problem is all due to that?”
“I’ve considered that, but I can’t find any solid correlation between the two,” I replied. “Still, I should have the answer before the week is out!”
Katherine nodded slowly. “If you say so.” She paused, looking around curiously. “Hey, where’s Rosa?”
I jerked a thumb over my shoulder towards the figurehead, where a tiny lead-colored fairy with a ruby in her chest and stained-glass wings sat and let out tinkling laughter at every wave that nearly slapped her off her perch.
A wry smile slipped onto my companion’s face as she watched the Carbuncle play around.
“At least someone is having fun!”
“Yes, yes, I’m mister grumpy-pants, no need to remind me,” I said, giving my fake eyes a tiny roll for emphasis. I was doing a lot better with the facial expressions, and Katherine nodded while fighting back a smirk at my nickname, courtesy of Rosa.
“Well, if you do want to do something other than lean against the mast and brood, you know where to find me,” Katherine said. She headed over to Rosa who bounced up happily and dragged the dwarf into a game of some sort.
I watched them for a bit before turning my attention inwards, and continued to probe my goopy, magical innards. It was embarrassing, and a potential problem, when I might up chuck one of the many items I kept stored inside my special artificial pocket dimension.
‘See anything unusual?’ I asked, and after a moment of contemplative silence a feminine voice replied with an answer.
~Not sure,~ the Spirit of Knowledge who lived in my mindscape said, as confused as I was. ~I still cannot find any reason why you would be experiencing this problem.~
‘The price I pay for sapience?’ I asked, more of a joke than anything. To my surprise, she hummed in thought, considering the idea.
~I don’t think so, this is something else, but it could be related. At first, I thought your stomach problems were related to the Divine spell Gaea bestowed upon you. Still haven’t figured out what it is, by the way,~ Tara muttered, sounding affronted by the latter part.
~But no, the spell was not the problem. And there doesn’t seem to be a problem with the connection between your Dimensional Pocket and your body, so it’s entirely possible this is all psychosomatic.~
‘It’s all in my
head, you mean?’ I queried, and I got the equivalent of a mental shrug directed at me.
~You believe people experience sea sickness on a boat, and thus your soul gives you the closest thing for someone like you. But, seeing as you almost instantly digest anything that you consume, it goes for the next best thing.~
‘Wonderful. I’m sabotaging my own body,’ I muttered, unimpressed with my subconscious. ‘Any solutions?’
~Think more positively.~
‘As always, you’ve been a wonderful helper,’ I said with a heaping helping of sarcasm. Tara blew a telepathic raspberry at me. Still have not figured out how to do the same on my end. But I will someday! On my honor as a magical, talking slime!
After a few more words spoken between Tara and myself, I withdrew from my inner world.
And found Rosa and Katherine staring at me while standing a bit too close.
“Um, can I help you?”
“I don’t know. Rosa, can he help us?”
(Nah. He’s too lazy and boring to be of use. Shame, shame, triple shame!)
Naturally, Katherine couldn’t hear a word of what Rosa had said, but the disappointed shaking of her head was pretty universal.
“I’m sorry?” I said hesitantly.
“You should be. Come on, it’s a nice day out, and you’ve just been spending it being a boring, sad, sack of slime,” Katherine replied.
“More of a blob than a sack,” I uttered under my breath. And then, a bit louder, “And what do you mean, I’m boring?!”
“You kind of are,” the dwarf maiden said with a shake of her head. “Let me ask you something: do you know the names of any of the crew?”
“Um, no, but what does…?”
“You’ve done nothing but stand around, looking constipated for three days,” Katherine interrupted. “It’s very rude. And boring.”
“I don’t see how that matters,” I claimed, and the Carbuncle and dwarf shared an exasperated look.
“You know, us dwarves have a term for people like you,” Katherine said after a moment. “And that would be ‘urdz craik parsh.’ Someone who loves duty for duty’s sake.”
“Really?” I asked, curious in spite of the topic being about my failings. Durg lidde, the language of the dwarves, was a fascinating one, and I’d not heard Katherine speak much of her ancestral tongue. It rolled out of her mouth like an avalanche of grit and pebbles, and her voice dipped an octave as she spoke.
“Well, the term is literally translated as ‘person who takes pleasure from importance,’ but close enough for your situation,” she explained, rubbing a hand on her chin. “What it means in context, though, is that it is a person that takes their job way too seriously. And you’re a prime example.”
She threw her arms wide. “Live a little! Sure, you have an ‘upset stomach,’ but this is your first time on the ocean! Enjoy it! There’s plenty of time to do other things later.”
Rosa bobbed her head eagerly in agreement with Katherine’s words.
(She’s right, you know,) the Ruby Carbuncle said through our mental link. (I understand your hesitation, being surrounded by so many strangers, but we’ll help you like we always have.)
She flew over to my ‘head’ and wrapped her arms around it in a tight hug. I reached up and patted Rosa fondly.
“Thanks, you two,” I replied softly, thanking the both of them. I straightened up and ignored the rolling sensation my immaterial gut suddenly experienced.
“Lead on.” The pair gleefully led me around the deck of the Striding Fish, the small trading cog we had boarded from Arv Prith a few days before.
Katherine and Rosa introduced me to the various sailors on board, as well as pointing out the different features the ship had. The Striding Fish had only a single mast, and was a rather small sailing vessel all things considered. There was a crenellation along the quarterdeck, which made the Striding Fish look like a floating castle.
The cargo hold was filled with dried fish, coral, pearls, and other bounties of the waters around Arv Prith, as well as a number of dwarf-made tools and handicrafts.
There was only a crew of eight for the entire ship, so everyone knew everyone else, and Katherine knew them all, greeting them by name and chatting a bit about how their lives were doing.
“And this is the most important person on board,” Katherine said happily, grinning up at the man currently standing behind the wheel. “Behold, my godfather, Captain Roach of the Striding Fish!”
He was a broad chested man, definitely the sort you’d envision when you thought of a sailor. Muscles like taut cords, and skin tanned and weathered by years of sun and salty waves.
The captain was not wearing a shirt, letting his hairy chest do all the talking, but he did sport a jaunty tricorn hat on his head, which he wore with pride.
“It’s pronounced ‘Ro-chey, my dear,” the man at the helm said with a chuckle.
“Unless it’s spelt that way, it isn’t pronounced that way,” the younger dwarf said with a teasing wink.
“Nice to finally meet you, kid. The name’s Roche, captain of this here trading vessel,” the man said, giving me his hand to shake. I took it and gave it a firm pump.
“Bit of a weak grip, there,” Captain Roche said with a grunt. “But that’s mage’s for ya. Barely able to do an honest day’s work.”
“Yes, that’s the reason,” I said slowly, glad he wasn’t too suspicious of my floppy fake hand, but somewhat put off by his assessment of my profession.
“Don’t mind him, he’s just a bit of a curmudgeon,” Katherine assured me. “He’s the sort who thinks fresh air and physical exercise can solve all that ails you.”
“And it works! Never been sick a day in my life!” Captain Roche said with a manly huff of pride.
“Unless you count hangovers, in which case you’re always sick,” Katherine teased. The two laughed as they bantered back-and-forth.
Katherine then took me by the arm and dragged me off to the side once the tour was over.
“So, what do you think?”
“A nice little ship,” I praised. “Though I have to ask, how does a man like that end up becoming your godfather?”
“He and my father met each other when they were in Riggs as apprentice merchants. Roche, the swashbuckler, and Flint, the peddler. They started a drunken brawl over which profession was better and earned an overnight stay in the local guard’s drunk cell. And, well, what happens in Riggs stays in Riggs, and they became close friends,” Katherine explained.
“He’s the one who gave you your name, then?”
“Yup! He named me,” she said with pride. “And in exchange dad got to name his son.”
“Was that the rigger you introduced me to? Coal?” I inquired, and she nodded.
“He’s like a brother to me.”
I recalled how the young sailor had given my hand a none-too-gentle squeeze and a whispered warning about treating Katherine right and silently agreed that the feeling was mutual.
A thought struck me, and I tilted my head before leaning in for a private question.
“By the way, speaking of your godfather and brother in all but blood, do they know about your, um, occupation?”
“You mean my adventuring?” she asked, a warning look in her eyes. “Of course. They’re fully supportive.”
“And the other thing?” I asked in a quieter voice.
“No, they don’t know anything about my work on the darker side of the law,” she said even more quietly. “And they never will. Understood?”
“Of course. Just didn’t want to say something and only belatedly discover they didn’t know about your ‘night job,’” I placated her.
Katherine nodded, gave me a vicious smile, and walked off to fetch Rosa, who had stayed behind with Captain Roche and was trying to steal his tricorn hat and wear it herself.
I huffed out a sigh of relief.
“That was close,” I muttered to myself.
~It is understandable why Katherine would not
want to be outed as a member of the Dark Guild to her family, though,~ Tara spoke up. ~After all, thieves and assassins are not the shining beacons of decency that adventurers are held up to be.~
I nodded in agreement with her words and leaned against the crenelated railing, tilting my head back to get a good look at the sky. I then had to make a hasty grab for my hat, which I had been wearing at the time and forgotten to remove, as it fell off my head towards the ocean.
“That was a close one,” I mumbled as I shoved the big, pointy, wide brimmed hat back onto my head. My illusions were good and only getting better, but all it took was one person look closer at my ‘face’ to notice it wasn’t as perfect as I liked to pretend it was.
As such, the big, floppy hat that was worn only by stereotypical witches and wizards was used to obscure my face and keep people from noticing that I rarely blinked, did not breath, or that my teeth were too white and straight to be natural.
Being a sapient Ooze in a world of bipedal humanoids was hard. But, I endured. And if the trip to Drakon panned out, I would soon have others that were like me.
At that thought I felt elation and excitement bubble up in my core, and I even plastered a silly grin on my ‘face’ to show how much I was looking forward to this.
It was thanks to Katherine that I’d discovered the location of Soul Oozes, unfortunate experiments of a twisted Dark mage. They were Oozes able to think and feel and speak, just like me. Unlike them, though, my sapience was a cosmic fluke, thanks entirely to being picked up as a pet of the kindest woman alive. Liliana Roan, princess of the kingdom of Varia. My owner, and the person to whom I owe everything.
~Other girls would get jealous when you think about someone besides them,~ Tara teased as I thought of my royal owner and I chuckled.
‘Oh, you know you love me.’
The Spirit of Knowledge snorted. ~of course I do, you crazy lug. After all, you’re my legs and eyes. Not being able to move on my own is rather limiting.~
And she was the second of the important women in my life. Tara, a magical monolith on which I accidentally bestowed intelligence, who, as a result, developed a mind and identity of her own. She liked to live in my head, since there was no way her original body could leave the Royal Varian Mage’s Academy.