by RJ Blain
“Then you will enjoy helping her to grow a garden of them in the back so she can enjoy them at her leisure. Perhaps you should build a greenhouse so she can enjoy them year round.” The devil smiled and kissed the top of his wife’s head. “And with that, I will pay you a visit another time. I have much to do tonight.”
The pair disappeared, and the angels followed the devil’s lead, leaving us alone. I opened my hand to regard Hammel’s seed with a frown. “I really don’t know what I’m supposed to do with this, Eoghan.”
“Take your time thinking about it. It’s going to be just about an eternity before the devil is done with that one. Deserved, if you ask me.”
“Did he scream a lot?” I asked, aware Eoghan had already commented about Hammel’s departure.
“For a rare change, I liked it,” Eoghan announced. “It is well enough he will have many long years in the devil’s care for his deeds. My memory is long. I do not feel he suffered enough in the transition for his crimes.”
“You can’t torture the seed anymore than it’s already being tortured.” To make sure Eoghan didn’t do anything nefarious to the seed, I put it in my pocket.
“I like that you admit the seed is being tortured,” he confessed.
“It seemed fair at the time. When an archangel seems to think it’s a good idea, it probably is. Still, poor Darlene.”
“Did you see her soul?”
“See it? No. I felt it. She had wandered near the boundary, and it is a cold place. I’m not sure if I want to see the boundary again. I’ve been there once, and feeling it is bad enough. Her soul doesn’t stray near the boundary anymore.”
“And now? Is her soul restored?”
I smiled. “I think she’ll be just fine. The devil has a pretty nice soul for a bad guy. It just took a little shooing to get her to go where she belonged. I suspect her soul is enjoying a lot of snuggling right now. He’s surprisingly warm, bright, and gentle. I guess he hasn’t lost all of his original nature, has he?”
“Souls rarely do for all they are balanced before returning to life. But they can change with time, given the right environment. I’ve seen the darkest souls cross through the boundary to live their next lives as remarkably good beings. It can happen.”
“And where I help plant this seed will help determine if it happens, doesn’t it?”
“It’s not an easy burden to bear.”
I shrugged. “Somebody has to do it.”
“Right you are. I suppose it was only a matter of time before the universe tired of doing the job. It hadn’t taken the universe long to tire of death, creating me. Shall we relocate this picnic to your other home? It seems we have to think about what we should build here.”
I knew exactly what we would build on the property: our future. Smiling, I went to work cleaning up the picnic. I saved the weed whacker for last, and blue fire danced along the handle, covered my hand, and infiltrated the pocket containing the seed. As far as I could tell, nothing had changed about the seed, but I couldn’t be sure.
For a brief moment, I swore I heard an angel’s ringing laughter, but I spotted no sign of one of the divines nearby.
“Angels are assholes, Eoghan.”
He laughed. “Did you just figure that one out?”
“Not really, but I thought I’d let you know anyway. Let’s get out of here.”
Twenty
I’m going to need a manual on how to seduce an ancient antique.
The potential for life lurked around every corner, waiting in the oddest of places. I spotted another seed of life in Lady Luck, just chilling on the dashboard until it could bring its soul back to the mortal coil. I buckled in, regarding the tiny grain of light through narrowed eyes.
“You see something,” Eoghan observed, clipping his seatbelt into place.
I gestured to the dashboard. “There’s a seed of life there.”
“Perhaps it seeks an opportunity to bring a soul back to the mortal coil.”
“In my truck?” I blurted.
Eoghan examined the cab with interest. “There is sufficient space for such an endeavor. It seems like it would be a challenge, but I could find interesting ways to make use of these belts.”
Okay. I stopped and considered the cab for a while, too. I could understand how the belts could be used in interesting ways. After learning the truth about Eoghan’s nature, I suspected I would be the one using the belts on him if he insisted on remaining stubborn. “I’m not sure I want a voyeur just sitting around watching what I may or may not do with a seatbelt.”
“It’s not really sentient. It’s just seeking opportunities. They tend to show up where there are opportunities.”
“In my truck?” I demanded again.
“I don’t see why not. I’ve participated in my fair share of seductions in carriages. This is not that much different from a carriage. It’s far more comfortable, too.”
I refused to become jealous over some woman who’d died hundreds of years ago, although I made some assumptions on the having died hundreds of years ago part of things. “Were you the seducer or the seduced?”
“A little bit of both, really.”
Well, that didn’t help my general cause any. “You’re going to have to help me out here, Eoghan. Either I’m going to need a manual on how to seduce an ancient antique, or you’re going to have to step up your game… but not in my truck.”
“Why not in your truck? It possesses many horses, and I find this appealing.”
Of course. I’d purchased his dream truck, and I had to admit, she had a certain appeal. “Not in my truck yet,” I replied, shaking my head at the insanity of it all.
“Yes, it would be a bit much for a first seduction to take place in such a location. Carriages make excellent seduction spots for later in a relationship.”
“Or with a paid lady of the night?”
“While I have met many a lovely lady of the night, I have never bedded any of them. I require more dedicated attention. I do not share well.”
Neither did I. “Having witnessed your behavior, I readily believe you are not very good at sharing.”
“Some things I am willing to share. A honey rock, for example, is something I would share with you.”
“Well played, Mr. Olin. Very well played.”
“Only a blind fool would not notice your adoration for those melons. I will take the advice given to me and plan a way to provide you with them year round. I may have to hold your prized melons hostage. Appropriate affections paid out would result in you receiving a melon to enjoy.”
Well, if he was trying to seduce me in my truck, he went about it the right way. “Keep talking.”
He chuckled. “If I keep talking, I would be forced to reduce you to begging, and while this is a lovely truck, it is unsuitable for such an event.”
I swiped the seed of life off my dashboard and put it in a different pocket so Hammel’s seed couldn’t bother it. “Does your magic let you see the past circumstances of a soul?”
“That is more of your power, once you learn to use it, but I can to a certain degree. Some souls have stronger imprints of their pasts than others.”
Hmm. I retrieved the seed and held it out to him. “What can you tell me about this one?”
Eoghan placed his hand over mine and closed his eyes. After a few minutes, he grunted. “She had a difficult life and a worse death. The seed probably perceived you as a safe place and manifested here.”
I found it odd the universe could be so uncaring yet compassionate at the same time. “Do I want to know how difficult?”
“No, you don’t. It is best if you do not pry too deeply into that soul’s past. It would be best if she slept without remembering.”
“Has her soul been resting a long time, then?”
“I can’t tell you that. I can tell you that she lived during a time of war and plague. There were still horses, but there were also odd horseless carriages. I cannot tell you much beyond that.”
“That sounds like World War I. A bad flu happened at the very end of the war, and when the soldiers all came home, they brought the illness with them. A lot of people died.” I couldn’t remember if magic had yet swept through the world or not then. Magic had changed everything, but some things remained the same—including humanity’s need to kill each other for money, power, and position.
“Yes, she had a soldier. He had returned home to her broken. If the disease hadn’t killed her, he would have. I get the feeling she believed, right up to the bitter end, she could fix him. Perhaps she could have. War ruins people. It changes them. But love can be a very powerful thing. She did not live long enough to find out.”
I grimaced. Even in small, backwater Sunset, violence infected some homes much like a disease. In a way, I’d been lucky. My parents’ abuses hadn’t extended to physical violence. They’d found other ways to torment me.
Perhaps her hope he’d improve had been why she’d stayed—and influenza had spared her from a long and bitter road.
I hurt for them both. “That’s so sad.”
“Before the war, he had been kind and gentle.”
“That makes it even sadder.”
Eoghan nodded. “She hadn’t screamed when she died. She’d been too tired. Hers is a gentle soul by its nature.”
It amazed me he could sense so much from the seed. “Will I be able to do the same as you can?”
“In time, I’m sure. It took me a thousand years to sense the seeds at all. You’re seeing them right away. Perhaps in time you can learn parts of my magic, just as I have learned parts of yours.”
“And Azrael?”
With a huff, Eoghan shrugged. “I don’t want to talk about him right now.”
“What do you want to talk about, then?” I closed my hand around the woman’s seed and returned her to my pocket. “I’ll figure out what to do with her later.”
“Generally, if you want the seed to go away, just ignore it for a while. It’ll go where needed. If you want to keep it around, you need to express the intent to keep it. Most put the seeds they want to keep in a box to symbolize their intent to keep it. The seeds are mostly inanimate, so once someone has laid a claim, they tend to stick around because they’re not really intelligent enough to wander off despite being capable of doing so.”
Life was truly complicated. “Okay. I’m just going to drive us to the house and deal with this another day.
Eoghan chuckled. “That’s one way to handle the situation. If that makes you happy, then we shall do that.”
I gave myself a few minutes to think over my situation, focusing on my odd relationship with Eoghan, my unrelenting attraction to the egotistical antique, and my utter lack of experience with men. “I’ve been told you’re going to be challenging to seduce, which is accurate, as I’ve never even attempted to seduce a man before.”
“I already told you before, all you have to do is beg,” he replied in an amused tone. “You seem quite stubborn, so I expect this will take you a very long time.”
I considered that. How did he define beg? Would a simple please work? Saying please sounded like begging to me. I’d be willing to say please. I’d even pull out a thank you afterwards, as I had some manners and even knew how to use them. “I don’t like begging, but I will say please. I’ll even put on something pretty when I say please. I’ll have to go buy something pretty, but you’re paying me good money to stick around, so I can afford to buy pretty things. We’ll have to take a field trip to the city for that, because there aren’t many good stores here. If you’re really nice to me, I’ll let you help pick out the pretty things.”
“You’re already beautiful. You do not need to try to make yourself pretty.”
I smiled at that. “But pretty would be very lacy.”
Eoghan’s eyes narrowed. “May I take that back? I seem to have developed an interest in you making yourself pretty alongside you being naturally beautiful.”
Love, I supposed, was truly blind, as I’d never thought of myself as anything other than plain and somewhat boring. I’d seen beautiful women before. I wasn’t one of them. With enough work and makeup, I could make myself somewhat fit society’s expectations for women.
I’d never liked the results—or the money required to hide my actual face beneath several layers of product.
“I will say please once and only once,” I stated, starting Lady Luck’s engine.
“I find it amusing you are attempting to negotiate. I see I have much to teach you on what it means to beg. I look forward to slowly and meticulously educating you on this subject. It seems only fair, as you need to teach me your language.”
I backed my truck out of the driveway, at a loss of what I was supposed to say, do, or think. “Should I be concerned?”
“You’ll enjoy it, so no. Beyond a lack of sleep, you have nothing to be concerned about. As what I have planned for you will take a great deal of time, you’ll have to wait until our home is properly built. We wouldn’t want to disturb your neighbors. That would be rude.”
“I’m not exactly a loud person.”
Eoghan leered at me. “When I’m done with you, you will be.”
A black dragon covered in opalescent scales lounged out on the roof of my house with his tail wrapped around the building. My neighbors gawked at it, and when I pulled the truck into the driveway, the dragon snorted smoke.
“Oh. It’s Yuless.” Eoghan flung the seatbelt off and dove out of my truck before I had a chance to kill the engine, a hand keeping the door propped open. “If you break her house, you’ll repair it and everything inside. And you’ll upgrade everything while you’re at it.”
Well, at least Eoghan cared about my house and possessions. My life had taken such a sharp left turn out of normality I appreciated someone understood the basics of survival, which included having a home.
The dragon snorted again, and more smoke poured from its nose. “You were always slow to get out of bed. I was told there’s a woman.”
Well, I did count as a woman. I turned the key in the ignition and sighed, giving Lady Luck a pat on her dashboard. “I’m not sure my life could possibly get weirder.” Delaying wouldn’t help, so I got out of my truck, closed the door, and circled the vehicle so I could shoo Eoghan away and close his door, too. I locked it, and my truck beeped to notify me the alarm system had engaged. Then I went to the back to unload everything. “There’s a dragon on my house, Eoghan.”
“Yes. His name is Yuless. He’s almost as old as I am, he’s far more annoying, and he loves using houses as his bed. It makes him feel special. One of his favorite hobbies is to annoy me.” Eoghan sighed. “Please don’t break her house. She is quite fond of it, and she’s already had a house broken today. She does not need a second home of hers broken quite yet. Anyway, if you break the house and endanger our vampire companion, I’ll be most displeased.”
“The vampire is fine. He is dozing inside. I startled him when I paid a visit, but he said you were out with your woman. At that point, I couldn’t just leave a message and head home, so I opted to wait. The humans are quite distraught I have taken up temporary residence here. They amuse me. The one likes that little weapon of his a great deal, and he thinks his threats are anything other than amusing. I helped myself to the first one he pointed at me. It tasted delicious. Good metal, aged wood. There might be a hole in the house, but that is not my fault.”
“Jeff, you didn’t!” I complained, turning around to face my neighbor and stomping my foot. “Where are your manners? Or better yet, where is your common sense?” Pointing at the dragon counted as rude, but I’d deal with the consequences of that later. “Did you fail to notice he is a dragon?”
“He invaded your property.”
“He isn’t doing anything wrong.”
“He shouldn’t be there.”
“He’s a dragon, Jeff. I figure he can go anywhere he wants. In case you had not noticed, he is large enough to swallow you whole. You’re lucky he only ate your g
un! You’d probably tickle while kicking and screaming to his stomach.”
“She’s not wrong,” the dragon announced. “I prefer my humans charred, but I might make an exception for a particularly annoying one. What do you go by in this age, old friend?”
“Eoghan. The lady is Anwen. I thought it would be fair to warn you that Azrael is up and about.”
“I have been warned. I’ve been told of your woman’s role, too. You must be pleased.”
“An ignorant fool thought to sacrifice her to me. I’ve accepted his offer with much glee. He was corrected on his misconceptions, but I am keeping her around. She’s unfortunately independent, and she wishes to earn her keep, so she is taking on the role of caretaker.”
“Your caretaker will require a caretaker. What became of yours?”
“Murdered.”
“A sad end to a loyal, good family. I’m sorry.”
Jeff spluttered. “Anwen, what is the meaning of this?”
“It seems Eoghan is friends with a dragon, and the dragon has paid us a visit. Put your gun away. It’s rude. Be hospitable for once, please.”
“He ate Betsy!”
“Well, you shouldn’t have pointed Betsy at him and fired her. You can buy a new Betsy from Walmart. She cost you less than two hundred dollars, and she’s the firearm equivalent of a cheap hussy,” I replied, allowing some of my scorn into my tone. “She was the cheapest damned double-barrel your money could buy.”
“Anwen,” Jeff whined.
“Jeff,” I whined back. “Put the damned gun away and leave my guests alone. Don’t make me be callin’ the cops. For pity’s sake, what does a woman have to do to get some peace around here?”
“Move to a different house,” Eoghan muttered. “One without neighbors.”
I almost laughed at that. “Eoghan, be nice.”
“I don’t feel like being nice. He put a hole in your house.”
I snorted, wondering if I should tell him a tiny hole counted as dinky damage compared to the shit my parents had pulled over the years. “That’s nothing some spackle and elbow grease won’t fix as long as he didn’t take out a wire, a pipe, or a window.”