by Pixie Chica
That stops me in my tracks. He stumbles into me and has to take a few quick steps back to not fall over. “Cute? I’m a fucking thirty-year-old man who can more than likely kick your ass. There’s nothing cute about me. I don’t enjoy getting made fun off by men like you. Men who think they are better than everyone else in the room. I know your kind.”
My words shock him, and I instantly feel bad when I see his demeanor changes. He goes quiet and starts to stare at the ground.
“I apologize, I... I shouldn’t have done that. I’m not great with people and I don’t even know why I let Crystal convince me to come. I’m better off in my office where people are used to my awkwardness. Fucking knew this would happen.” He says in an almost whisper.
“It’s fine, I’m sorry I blew up. I’m not great reading people either, Crystal’s family are suits, as my own father was. Both weren’t great examples, but we’ll have to co-exist, so let’s start over. I’m Kent Kayson.” I extend my hand and he takes it, shaking it.
“John Alexander Jones.”
Shit, this was the single guy Brandie had talked about. The current of electricity that courses through me at his touch makes me drop his hand abruptly as we both look at each other. Did he feel it too?
Chapter 2
John Alexander
I wasn’t expecting my future when I knocked on the door, but now that I found it in Kent, I needed him to know it. I just wasn’t sure how I was going to accomplish that. I already messed up the first impression because I was so amused at his innocent questioning. Just as I had predicted, when I met the one, I was going to mess up royally. Kent already had a predetermined hatred of all men who wore suits, which sucks because I wear them ninety-nine percent of the time.
First thing on my agenda was getting a new outfit that didn’t remind him of how much he wanted to eliminate my kind from his life. Then I needed to learn how to actually talk to people. I was horrible at it, but I had this desire to do so with him.
From the moment we shook hands, it was as if a magnet was pulling me to him. I wanted, no, needed to know what it felt like to hold him in my arms or to walk down the street his hand in mine. The desire to do this willingly being new to me. The few boyfriends I had in the past always told me I was cold, or distant. Which was true looking back, not a single one had instilled in me these feelings, even after dating them for months.
Looking over at him, trying not to get caught staring, when he bends over to move a machine, I groan. He’s got a nice ass. My pants start to strangle me, and I adjust myself, hoping my jacket can cover the damn hard on I’m sporting. Now I’m going to have to wear this all day.
Kent looks like a model with his tanned skin and caramel eyes. I watch as he lifts another box and a drop of sweat runs down his broad back and not for the first time today, I wonder what it would feel like to lick it off him. That should have all kinds of warning bells going off about the state of my mind, but it doesn't. He’s strong but not built like some men that are all bulgy muscles, he’s more the athletic and lean type. Even his height was perfect being just a couple inches shorter than my own 6 feet. I’d love to push him against a wall as I pull on his long hair and bite his neck. The feel of his scruffy beard against my own would be heavenly. Fuck me, I’m going to be sporting a wet spot.
He turns around with a questioning look, and I realize I’ve said the words out loud. I can only hope he didn’t hear me and get back to work. Hours go by where we get most of everything packed, I finally got him to loosen up enough to accept having dinner with me — sort of — he accepts picking up pizza and bringing it back to the shop. But I’m counting it as a date. I’ve got to take all the little advantages I can.
SITTING CROSS LEGGED in front of me, leaning back on his elbows, he throws his head back in a genuine laughter. The sound is the sweetest thing I have ever heard. The inclination to kiss him is so strong, I’m not sure I can contain myself much longer. Tomorrow. I had to find a way to get him to let me kiss him by then or I was going to go crazy.
“Ok so tell me, what is the worst thing about you?” He asks, a glint of honest curiosity in his eyes.
“I don’t ‘people’ well,” I admit. “I often say things that others don’t take quite right, case in point, our earlier interaction. I also struggle with being affectionate.”
“That can’t be good for your boyfriend.” He tells me, having already established we were both gay.
“No boyfriend. It’s been a while, unless you consider work my man. It keeps me up at all hours of the night.” I laugh, but there’s so much truth in that statement.
“Oh, so you’re one of those, workaholics.” He says and the words sound like poison coming out of his mouth his eyes darkening with the statement. Craving to see his smile again, I lie and hope I can deliver on it when the time comes.
“It’s just something I do to pass the time. It’s not like there’s someone waiting for me at home.” I shrug.
“Ok, I guess I get that.”
Deciding I have to put all the cards on the table, I bite my lip, second guessing myself. Would I be ok with him rejecting me? No, I wouldn’t, but I still had to try. If he did refuse, I would just keep trying until he realized that we were meant to be. It was destiny, the proof beating in my chest. I hadn’t felt like this just looking at someone before, and I wouldn’t let go of that.
“Something on your mind?” He asks reading right through me.
Clearing my throat, I ask him out. He sits there staring at me until I start to get nervous. The way his eyes bore into me, is almost like he’s seeking to find all my secrets to dissect them one by one. And I’d let him for a chance at forever with him. The thought hits me like a bucket of cold water. Did I really want forever? Yes, desperately.
“You’re going to make this hard on me. I can tell.”
“Make what hard on you?” I ask.
“You don’t want to know how many things.”
I watch his Adam’s apple move up and down as he swallows. The words meaning so much more, the sexual tension between us thick in the air.
“You still didn’t answer my question.”
“I know.”
Sadly, the moment is lost when someone knocks on the door, both of us cursing when it happens. I almost had him agreeing to a date, before the super of the building who is now on my shit list, came interrupting. After getting some things settled with Kent, he leaves, but there’s no way of going back to that magical moment we had just shared.
Coming towards me, Kent extends his hand out, helping me up. I take it, dusting the dirt from the floor off myself, which isn’t much.
“So... I better get going. Your hotel isn’t too far from my apartment. I can give you a tour of the town before we finish packing, if you’d like. Crystal texted me where you are staying so I can go by to pick you up.”
Not about to look a gift horse in the mouth, I accept the tour. Anytime I get to spend with him is a plus in my book. Stepping outside he locks the door behind us and goes in for a handshake but I, of course, misread going in for a hug. We end up doing this weird shake hug combo and I want to bang my head against the wall. The only good thing is that it makes him smile. Happiness fills me for the first time ever, as I walk towards the car.
After finding an outfit at the nearest clothing store, that looked as casual as I could pull off, I head to my hotel to try and get some sleep, only it doesn’t come. I’m too excited about our tour tomorrow. I start pacing the room, then head outside to go for a walk. By the time I make it back to my hotel it’s five in the morning, so I jump in the shower.
Looking at my phone after getting dressed I see the text from Crystal. My luck seems to be getting better by the minute. The woman is a life saver letting me know where spare key is, as well as inviting me to make myself at home. With renewed energy, I head towards the apartment. What’s the worst that could happen? I kind of like this living on the edge stuff.
Chapter 3
Kent
Waking up with no one else in the apartment was nice for a change. Although I loved living with Crystal, there was a freedom in knowing I can walk around my house naked while singing off key. Sitting up in bed, I glance at the clock and realize it is too fucking early to be awake, but I know I must go back to packing. Yesterday we finished most of it, way ahead of schedule, and I’d be glad to cross that off my checklist. Not to mention, I was supposed to play tour guide for John Alexander, and that was going to prove to be hard as fuck to do. Especially since he broke through my defenses. I was so close to agreeing on going on a date with him. The easy banter and conversation between us felt natural. Then his small half-smiles and hearty laughter had me wanting to forget all about avoiding men like him.
Since we got interrupted, I went home. Sometime late last night, Crystal had called in an effort to calm her nerves and make sure I was still coming. I could tell she was having a hard time assimilating to everything and she wanted someone to hear her out. She was especially nervous about Joe going solo around the world, having big shoes to fill, and that was scary enough. But, like me, she too was leaving everything behind for a world that we only thought existed in books and little kid’s imaginations.
Determining it’s best to get a head start and have some coffee before dealing with the man I was developing an unhealthy crush on within hours of meeting, I hit the alarm before it sounds. Taking my newfound liberty and self-indulgent attitude in full swing, I let it all hang out. After doing my morning hygiene routine, I head in the direction of the kitchen to grab my protein shake. I hate that shit, but it was a habit Crystal had gotten me into. According to her, I needed to live forever to keep her company. After gulping it down, I grimace, and head in front of my tv for my daily meditating.
“Ok self, it’s time to get a head start on your New Year's resolutions. Let’s get these stretches in. Alexa, play instrumental playlist.” Heading to the empty space, I lay out my exercise matt and let the music drown all my emotions. Sitting Indian style, I start my affirmations, another of Crystals must-dos. “I will be awesome today. I will own this it and claim it as Kent’s Day. No one will cause me to get distracted. Especially not the hot Christmas elf in the suit.” Feeling on top of the world, and pretty good about getting my head on straight... I hear a clearing of a throat. Getting on my feet faster than I ever have in my life, I come face to face with none other than John.
A blush creeps up my cheeks, when he doesn’t avert his eyes. He is trying hard to hide the smile that is creeping up the sides of his mouth. “So, is it safe to say you still think I’m an elf?” He asks, this time he does smile, lighting up his whole face, making him even more desirable. When I glare at him, he changes his tune.
“Ok, I’ll skip that question. Crystal gave the spare key, so I let myself in. I figured you’d like some company and some strong coffee. Are you a nudist? I don’t think we’ve had one of those before, but as long as you do it inside your home, you’ll be fine.”
“What? Nudist? Jeez, no! I was just...” It’s then I realize I’ve been naked this whole time, too distracted to notice before, “Never mind what I was doing. Why are you at my house at 6 a.m.?” I yell, grabbing a throw pillow off the sofa to cover my junk. Appalled at the turn of events I run to my room to put some pants on.
“This is late for me, I’m always up at 4 a.m. but I couldn’t sleep last night. Nice package by the way!”
Nice package? This guy has to be mental.
Emerging a few minutes later from my room, fully dressed and with extra layers on, I am ready to take on John. He’s leaning against the wall looking at his phone, giving me a minute to take him in. Damn is today going to be torture. He’s changed his suit into jeans and a Christmas shirt that is tight against his arms and chest. He’s even more fit than I had assumed yesterday. My wandering eyes dare go lower, and I aim right at his tented pants. Oh! Averting my eyes, the second I do it, I look up and I’ve been caught.
“Just so you know...I don’t mind being your Christmas Elf.” He says, pushing off the wall.
“How about that tour?” I reply, trying to change the subject, but he doesn’t let me.
“How distracted do I make you?”
“You heard all of it, didn’t you?”
“Yup, and I can’t say I’m mad about it. But I guess we can go on that tour; I’d love to get to know you better before you go out to dinner with me.”
“That’s a little presumptuous, don’t you think? I never said yes yesterday, why would I now?”
“Because you were about to say yes yesterday. You said it yourself, I’m a distraction, why not see if that’s all I am? Then you can move on to the Year of Kent, or not,” he wraps an arm around my shoulder before continuing. “I rather it be the year of Kent and John.”
“Fine, I’ll take you up on that dinner, just so I can find your flaws and run.”
“We’ll see what happens. I have no clue why Crystal picked me, but I’m thanking my lucky stars she did. I got plans for you and me.” He winks at me and I scoff at him.
“What plans?”
“You’ll see.”
“Whatever, let’s get this tour on the way.” I try to remove his arm, but he only pulls me closer, and I let him, finally giving up on eradicating his tight hold.
“And dinner. Let’s not forget that.”
WHEN SOMETHING IS TOO good to be true, trust your instincts. Mr. Perfect had a huge flaw. One I had seen coming, although he had denied it through and through. We had been having a swell time when his job called in the middle of an early dinner, which we had planned to follow with a movie. I had told him it was fine, but one phone call turned into twenty, and the next thing I knew he set up a mini office in my apartment. Laptop, mini printer, the whole works, and all the while the man didn’t even acknowledge I was in the room. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t pissed at there being an emergency. I understood things happened, but he went from damage control to full on control freak, drilling everyone in his team. I know what it is to work all the time, hell I work three different jobs, but I also know when to quit. In lieu of sitting there watching him turn into the boss from hell, I took an extra shift at Sashay Queens, and came back only to find him hours later in the same spot. He looked tense and stressed, and a part of me hurt for him.
Determining not to judge the guy by one day’s actions, I walk out this morning ready to invite him to the brunch show I DJ on Sundays, then we could finish the last bit of packing. Only he is still sitting in the same spot, phone in hand, and he is definitely wearing yesterday’s clothes. Not even bothering to say goodbye, I leave, placing a note on the door for whenever he comes out of zombie mode. I know his kind and I want nothing to do with it, he blew his chance. Yet, the knowledge upsets me, and I’m a mess.
My own father was a workaholic, and he drove my mother into alcoholism. Growing up it killed me to see her drink her way into oblivion night after night. I hadn’t seen her in years, but I could bet my last dollar she was drunk right now. Or maybe she finally let the bottle take her to the grave. When I left home years ago I had begged her to come with me, which only earned me a slap. She even went as far as to banish me, asking that I never come back. Her infatuation with him blinding her. Not once did she see how his cold indifference destroyed the joyful woman she once had been. Yeah, no thank you.
Pushing John out of my head, who yesterday gave me more emotions in a matter of hours than any of my few exes put together, I concentrate on my set. I’m in the middle of one of my favorite playlists, lost in the music, when Tim, one of my co-workers, comes in the booth with me. He reaches over to grab something, and he gets a little too close, so I move to the side. When he leaves, I find his action odd considering he knows how much I avoid him. We went on one date when he wouldn’t stop insisting, and I ran the other way.
At the end of my set, I come down to take a break from DJing when Olivia Lightening Fuck, one of the headlining Drag Queens, comes over my way. There’s a funny smile on
her face and I cock an eyebrow at her.
“You naughty, naughty Kent. No wonder you never let anyone hit on you. If I had a man like that at home, I’d be keeping all the idiots at bay, too. Can’t believe how well you kept that a secret.”
Not quite sure what she is talking about, I ask her to clarify. When she points me in the direction of one of the tables, my heart stops. There, in a corner booth, is John, back in business attire, but he doesn’t look as put together as he did that first night. His shirt sleeves are rolled up, and there are a few loose buttons, already putting me on alert that something is wrong, but it’s his look of distress that concerns me the most.
“Your boyfriend requested three times that I please call you down when you were done. What did you do? Leave home without giving him his morning biscuit.” She teases, giving me a wink. “He’s about to lose it waiting for you.”
“Shut up. He’s not my boyfriend.” I reply.
“No, you’re right... the way he worded it was he was your man. So um...you better get on that.” She walks away laughing. My man, what the fuck?
Chapter 4
John
I fucked up...I knew it, and when I heard the front door close with a bit of a slam it knocked me right on my dumb ass. My controlling self had gone to work and stayed up all night over something that would have worked itself out. I promised Kent dinner and a movie, and what did I do? Barely make it through dinner, when I answered, what should have been a quick phone call, and turned it into me becoming work obsessed.
But no more, I was ruining the small chance he gave me. Taking the note left behind, being extra thankful he wasn’t mad enough to not tell me where he would be, I get ready to head out the door. Until I look down and see I’m still in yesterday's clothes. Yeah, you’re an idiot. I make quick work of a shower and put on all I have left, another suit. Great John let’s head there in the damn outfit he hates.