"So, you are telling me I am cheesy."
"No, you are one hell of a hot salsa. I got only a small bite, but it has me hooked. I am craving for second helpings." Jon swipes his tongue across his lips.
If my jaw could drop to the floor, it would. I fight hard not to blush or run from the cafe.
"Throwing innuendos at me will earn you no brownie points, Mr.Hayes."
"Nope, that is a line to seduce you. The sex part will come later."
I am to blame for this, I lead him on. "Shut up, Jon. You are a lunatic."
"Oh honey, I am only this loony-moony when I am with you."
I raise both my hands in front of me and make a circle with my thumbs and index fingers. I move the circle to target Jon's face from a distance.
"What are you up to, Tigress?"
"Nothing, I need to gauge the size of your neck so I can use the right pressure to strangle you."
He chokes on his coffee, spraying his t-shirt and jacket. I lose control and laugh out loud. After Tom, this is the second time I have had a person choke on their drink. At this rate, I will become an expert at getting people to spray their drinks.
"You trying to scare me off Tigress, because like I said, you are stuck with me."
I stare at him for a moment. "Jon, what are you trying to do?"
"That is your second question for the day, so after I answer it, I get to ask another question." He keeps looking at me, seeking my agreement. I raise my eyebrows, "Whatever. Go on."
"I am trying to get to know you better. Though the seduction part is the real reason and the romp between the sheets, which comes later." He winks at me and I smack his hand.
"Snap out of it, Jon. You have high hopes of yourself."
"Okay, let us play your game like sober grown-ups. Why did you return the cheque for the kids in your program?"
Jon's question catches me off guard. What can I say? On that day, I was flustered and upset. It seemed like the most logical thing to do. I wanted nothing related to him. But later, once the anger subsided, I realized my mistake. Yeh, sometimes Ms. Geeky Meeky does stupid things. I regretted that decision. Not because of the money which we needed, but in my heart, I realized it must have hurt him. Time for me to own up to my mistake.
"Jon, I am sorry. It was a bad call on my part. If it helps, you did support us in one way. Your jersey alone earned us enough at the auction."
Jon does not hide the hurt expression. I reach out and place my hand on his. "Please understand, that money is not the only thing those kids need. They need role models. Their circumstances at home and in their communities don't have people they can emulate. We work with them to help them come out of the negativity surrounding their life. Broken homes, domestic and sexual violence, drug abuse, and whatnot. We break that cycle. We show them there is more to this world and give them hope."
He holds my fingers and rubs them with his thumb. Our eyes lock. Why is this happening? I shiver. The attraction is too strong to resist anymore. Reign in your dopamine cannons doc. Your mesolimbic pathway is in overdrive. Excuse me with Ms. Geeky Meeky's verbal vitriol. In plain Jane terms, Jon is triggering these stupid pheromones that are messing up my rational mind.
Chapter 31: A Fresh Start
Jon
Gosh, this woman is something. She has gone through so much in her life and yet, she is not bitter or broken. Her heart is made of gold. She gives love and shows kindness to everyone and everything she touches. The image of her as an angel, that Nate drew, flashes in my mind. I cannot help myself from smiling as I sit here, watching her dark brown eyes.
She shakes my hand. "Are you all right, Jon? I am sorry if I crossed the line by asking that question. You don't need to answer it if you don't want to." Her words shake me out of my trance. What did I miss? I had zoned out. God, I want to lose myself in those eyes. "Sorry. For a moment there, I got lost in my thoughts. What did you ask?"
Sharon hesitates before repeating her question. "What happened to Nate's mom? I read you went through a difficult divorce. I don't want to bring up bad memories. Forget I asked."
I consider her question for a moment. Should I let her into the dark chapter of my life? She let me in, so, it is only fair that I share my story.
"It was early days in my career. I was heady with all the attention. I met Valerie at one of the post-match parties. It was supposed to be a one-nighter. Despite precautions she got pregnant. It came as a shock. I had my doubts and at the time, I was not ready for a kid. My cousin suggested a paternity test, but I realized it was a bad idea. We got married."
"Seven months later, Nate was born. One glimpse of his blue eyes staring at me from inside the cloth wrapped around him, made me fall in love. Valerie did not want to raise our baby. She hired a nanny on the first day after coming home. She started her partying and late nights within a week. I was away most of the time due to football. She left the nanny to take care of feeding Nate. I hated her behavior. We had a lot of arguments."
"One day, I came home from a match. Valerie was not there, as usual. The nanny handed me a letter. Valerie wanted a divorce—she had moved out, leaving Nate and me. It broke me, Nate was only five months old."
I pause for breath and rub my face with my palms, trying to hide the pain from Sharon. For the past five years, I have hidden this part of my life, but Sharon has broken through these walls.
"Jon, stop. I don't want you to relive those memories." She leans forward and holds my hands. The softness and concern in her eyes tell me she cares for me. Her moist eyes show she understands my pain. Not out of sympathy, but from compassion. I squeeze her hands. We stay staring for a while before her soft voice awakens me. "It must have been difficult raising such a small child with all your travel and practice."
I nod, "Yeah, it was difficult. However, Mom and Emily chipped in. It is more difficult now as he misses me."
"Have you told him about Valerie?"
I squeeze her hands. "He used to ask when he started school, wondering why other kids had both parents. I have kept it simple so far, but at some stage, I will need to explain why his mother does not want anything to do with him. It makes me sick."
"You are a great father, Jon. You are doing an excellent job. Nate is a wonderful child. I am sure he will understand."
When I look up from our hands, she is staring at me. God, if this was not a public place I would have pulled her in my arms and kissed those lips. I want to say so many things. Tell her about my feelings. Speak to her about Nate and how he adores her. I do not get the chance.
The moment is lost in searching the right words. Life plays such cruel jokes at times. When I am alone, I can end up writing a book about my feelings. When she is in front of me, my mind freezes.
Her pager buzzes. She gets up, startled.
"Sorry, I need to go. Lost track of time."
I nod, "Sorry, I am intruding on your time. We will meet tomorrow."
"No need to apologize. I enjoyed my time with you. See you tomorrow," She waves her hand.
"Sharon, thank you for giving me another chance." She nods, her cheeks flushed. I pull her towards myself but she keeps her distance. She smiles before walking away.
The yearning returns. Despite spending an hour with her, I am thirsty. The itch to run and gather her in my arms is strong. Bad idea, boy. Yeah, that will make her run away faster in the opposite direction.
Give her space, man, and appreciate the progress you made today, sharing a part of each other's lives. It is a slow start, with the promise of greater things to come. The ball is in play and there is no goddamn baller this side of the coast who can keep it rolling as I do.
Chapter 32: What Next?
Sharon
Do I look forward to meeting him?
Yes.
Do I like him and enjoy his company?
Yes.
Do I want to move to the next step in our relationship?
Hm. . .
"Someone is in a happy mood." Tom takes his sea
t. We are having our rare Sunday brunch.
"Wait for a while. Take in the atmosphere. Your spirits will rise." I take a sip from my smoothie. The sun is up. The place is more beautiful today than the last time we had brunch here. Two months ago, it was covered in a blanket of fresh white snow sobered by a cold grey sky.
In spring the patio is inviting. This roadside restaurant is our favorite weekend spot. The brick patio is surrounded by fresh greens emerging from the recently melted snow. Strings of bulbs and colorful lanterns hang from the trees. The wood and wrought iron furniture complete the rustic charm.
"It is bright and sunny. The air is so fresh." I inhale deeply to fill my lungs. "Did you note, they changed the lanterns and added the cushions, making the place more vibrant than last year?" My gaze stops at Tom staring at me with a smug face.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Wondering how two weeks of daily coffee-time talk has brought about a change in you."
"What are you talking about?"
"Don't try to hide the smile, Dr. Sharon, or the juicy details of your budding romance. I want the whole story with all the itsy-bitsy details."
"Let us order first," I call the waiter, not leaving any scope for Tom to grill me. Though it only delays the inevitable.
The moment the waiter leaves, Tom goes right back. "So, what all has been happening under the trees at the hospital cafe?"
"Nothing like what you make it sound like. We spend time talking about things in general. Jon is fun to be around. He is easy to talk to. Those hours spent with him are some of my happiest moments."
"Why do I sense there is a 'but' in there?"
I guess the lingering shreds of self-doubt must have reflected in my tone. "I am at a point where I wish there was more in this relationship. He gives enough hints with his flirting to what he wants. I only have to lead him on, and things would become interesting"
"What is stopping you?"
"I can't let go of the fear of crossing the professional ethics line. How can I get myself to take the final step and allow him in? I also need to consider my past. I have no trust in relationships." I've experienced enough disasters at a close level. Am I ready to put myself through such an emotional roller coaster? I'm unsure if I can bear the weight of expectations that will add on with time. Or if Jon can survive me.
Our food arrives, preventing my thoughts from spiraling into the sulk zone. We dig into our food. The Mexican here is Tom's favorite. After he has satisfied his initial hunger pangs, Tom picks up the conversation. "Why cling to the past, when you can live a beautiful present? Why worry yourself silly over a future you can't control?"
"Hm, you are right. Why worry when I am not even sure if Jon wants a relationship?" I carry on after finishing a spoonful of my Mexican bean salad. "He does have a playboy image. Though nothing in his behavior towards me suggests I am another fling for him, but then again, I am not a mind reader."
"Hm," Tom munches on his taco. He wipes his fingers on his napkin and picks up his drink. "You are overthinking."
"Yep, you are right. Can we forget Jon for now? This is our time. Let us enjoy our brunch."
We spend the next half hour munching and chit-chatting. Before we say our goodbyes, Tom asks me about what is next with Jon, considering his therapy sessions will end soon. I can only shrug.
My doubts are answered on Monday—the last day of his physio with Betsy. Our last coffee meet. Jon and I have become permanent fixtures at the cafe around noon. Evan, the cafe owner, has now reserved a table for us. I did not realize it until Jon pointed out. We always sit at the same table.
The hospital sessions were beneficial for Jon. He made considerable progress. He now walks without a limp. Jon will start going to the stadium soon. Betsy spoke to his team physio and shared the program with them.
The air is tense. I am at a loss. Jon helps me unwind from the day's work. Today, we are sitting here, sipping coffee in silence. I have no clue what to say. The reality of missing his company is gnawing at the back of my mind.
"What next, Sharon?"
Jon waits for an answer. What should I say? The professional line always glares at me, warning me against the consequences.
"You go back to the field, but take it easy. Don't rush things." With my heart and mind wrestling to gain control, I come up with a lame statement to circumvent the issue. I lower my head, avoiding his eyes. He sees right through me and stops my hand from twirling my curls.
"Sharon, we can't keep avoiding the topic. I meant, what is next for us? How do we keep meeting? I like you, Sharon. The time I spend with you has helped more than my therapy here. It is the bright spot of my day, helping me wake up every day with hope. Sharon, I want you in my life." He holds my chin and moves my face towards him. The gaze is intense, making it clear what he wants.
The same desire burns inside me. But how do I say it? I'm afraid of taking that step in our relationship. Confused between what my heart wants and what my mind warns against. I wait every day, for the coffee break. Eager to meet him and spend time together, only the two of us. I'm addicted to his company. "Jon, I... We should not cross this line. It is too soon."
It disappoints him, but he does not react. "I can wait if you need time and wish to take it slow. If that is what you want, Sharon." After a pause, he asks "You did not answer my question. How do we meet next?"
"Are you asking me out?"
"I am not asking. I am taking you out. You need to tell me about the time and place." Jon is firm in his resolve.
"You are presumptuous. Is that how you play your game? How about I take you to meet the kids? Show you what we do." This way, I can avoid any alone time with him outside the hospital.
"I charge for my appearances, Dr. Sharon." Jon's eyes shine. How do I resist him with this smile?
He wants to play. Well, I am not bad at this. "Then, forget it. I can't afford you."
"I might waive off my fee in exchange for a dinner or a lunch date. Whichever suits you." Jon calls my bluff.
Damn. Now I am stuck. I think about my options. The prospect of spending more time with Jon excites my heart. "Okay, done. Let us meet on Friday. I will take a day off."
"I will come and pick you up." He puts his hand forward to shake mine.
I shake his hand in agreement. "Sure, I will text you the address. Will 4 p.m suit you?" He nods.
We stand together and to my surprise, he leans over and kisses my cheek followed by a gentle rub on my lips with his fingers. The PDA melts Ms. Geeky Meeky into a puddle. My sensible brain is furious at her abject surrender. It smacks her out of her lust slumber. You are in the middle of the atrium foolish girl.
I put on a fake glare, but my lips are traitors. They don't stop smiling. "You said we will take it slow. Where are the brakes, Mr. Hayes?"
I do not wait for his answer and walk out, hoping no one has taken a picture of us. I am not ready for my life to trend on Instagram.
Chapter 33: Happy Zone
Jon
"Why are you so happy today?" Jason confronts me as we complete our last run around the stadium. He has been eyeing me ever since we started our training session an hour ago. Questions are hanging on his lips.
"Why shouldn't I be? I am back to where I belong." I extend my hands to the side and breathe the air. This stadium means so much to me. My second home. Four months ago, I nearly lost it. True to her word, Sharon spoke to my coach and head trainer. They agreed to allow me to the OTAs for a week's practice with certain limitations. Sharon had ensured there would be no going overboard. During the OTAs, apart from joining my mates in the training sessions, I was cleared for the seven on seven drills. She and Tom had worked out a plan to ease me into the pre-season training camp.
I would have liked to play more, but you can't argue with your doctor. The fresh air is exhilarating. It is exciting to be back on the ground. My leg is doing good. The athletic trainers and coaches are glad about my progress. I hope to be off the PUP (players unabl
e to perform) list by the time the pre-season starts.
"Good for you. Is this the only reason? I have never seen you smile so much in an hour."
I ignore Jason and continue my stretching routine. He stands glaring at me. "Out with it."
"Hey, stop your interrogation, Barney." Jason's quizzical expression makes me laugh. I tell him about the names Sharon gave us during our first meeting on the interstate.
"Okay, Freddy." Jason rolls his eyes before he pulls my outstretched arm. "Stop skirting my question."
"Are you jealous of my happy mood?" I shrug him off.
"No bro, I have a right to know everything about you. You haven't told me anything about your rehab at the hospital. Emily tells me there have been daily coffee dates." Jason already has the scoop. God, what do I do about my family? They won't stop gossiping.
"Who told her?" I act surprised.
Jason crosses his arms, digging in. "She has been talking to your girlfriend? They became friends during your stay at the hospital."
"So. . . ?" I continue to fake it trying to give the impression that nothing is going on.
"So, what?" Jason pulls me to face him. Now there is no escape. He shouts at me. "Come on, man. I want everything. All the details."
"And why should I tell you?" I want to tease Jason to see how far he will go. We share everything. Well, not all. Some details are too personal.
"Because I am your best friend and your bro-in-law, Jonny boy," Jason squeezes my arm. I relent and tell him all about our meetings.
"Fantastic. What next, man?" Jason is more excited than I am at the news.
"We are going on a date today." I can't hold my excitement from bubbling out.
"Oh, is that why you are so springy today? Good for you, mate. Say hello to the doc." Jason says goodbye and I run to my car to head back home.
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