by Kitty Jones
I cry because I’m scared to be honest with Aaron about what I want.
I cry because all I really, really want is him, but the idea of getting him seems so incredibly out of reach that it’s impossible.
And I cry because I need to.
I cry for everything I’ve ever lost, and then it stops.
He lifts me up, and I hiss as my ass hits his pants. He doesn’t laugh or tease me. He doesn’t say anything about the sound.
“Mallory,” he says. This time, his voice sounds almost pained. I don’t think he wanted to spank me. I think he felt like he needed to. He felt like I was practically begging him for one, and that much is true.
For me, boundaries are important. I need to know how much I can push someone. Call it bratting or call it being naughty: I don’t care.
“Yes, Daddy?” I whisper.
“Good girl,” he murmurs the words almost so quietly that I can’t hear, but I do.
I hear him.
“Tell me why you fussed,” he says.
“Because I wanted you to finish the story,” I say.
My ass is aching.
Shit, it hurts so fucking bad.He reaches for my chin and tilts it up. Aaron forces me to look into his eyes, and I kind of hate that and love it at the same time.
“And is it more important to get your way or to obey Daddy?” He asks.
“It’s important to obey,” I tell him quietly.
“But?”
“But I didn’t want to.”
“I know you wanted to finish the story,” he says, validating my feelings. He understands that I wanted something. Now it’s my turn to try to understand. “But I had some other things planned for us.”
“Like what?” I whisper.
“I wanted to undress you, little one, and I wanted to play with you.”
So he wanted to be romantic. Is that it? He wanted to be sweet, and I had to go and ruin it with an attitude.
“I’m sorry.”
“You took your spanking like a champ. All is forgiven,” he says. “Now put the book away, Mallory, and come back to me.”
I slide off his lap and drop down off the bed. My ass still hurts, and I get the feeling that it’s going to be painful for a long time. I take the book and carry it back to the bookshelf. I’m very aware of the fact that Aaron and I just shared something really intense, and I get the feeling that things between us are changing.
They’re getting deeper and more intense and if there was any thought that things would be the same after tonight, they’re gone now.
There’s no way in hell things can stay the same now.
He spanked me.
He didn’t just slap me on the bottom and call me a naughty girl.
No, he fucking disciplined me, and I’m embarrassed as hell with how much I loved it. I enjoyed it, and yeah, I was craving it. I don’t like to admit that shit to myself on a good day, but today, I needed it. I needed him. I wanted that boundary and he was willing to step up and give it to me.
Now I set the book on the shelf, and I turn around. He crooks his finger, calling me forward, and I move to him. Like a moth to a flame, I can’t stay away from him.
I don’t want to.
I want him.
More of him.
All of him.
I climb on the bed and he pulls me into his lap again. This time, I don’t whine about the pain or the way my ass hurts. I don’t fuss or bitch or do anything except kiss him.
And oh, he kisses me back.
Long, hard, wonderful.
He kisses me over and over again, and I decide right then and there that tonight is going to be the night that I have sex with Aaron Winters.
Chapter Seventeen
Aaron
I didn’t want to spank Mallory.
It wasn’t part of my plan for the evening. It definitely wasn’t something I’d planned on doing like that. I’ve given punishment spankings before, and they’ve never really been something that turns me on, but tonight, she needed it.
I don’t know why, but Mallory needed that boundary. She needed to know where the line was of acceptable behavior. She wanted to know that I care enough to enforce what I say, and she wanted to know that I was willing to stand up to her.
Well, I was.
Now her bottom is a bright red, and she’s probably going to be bruised and sore tomorrow. Talking about bruised and sore, my hand is fucking killing me. I should have used a hairbrush. Then again, I didn’t really want to spank her. One day, probably tomorrow, we’re going to have a hard talk about why she was so mouthy with me. We’re going to discuss why she didn’t calm down, and why she felt the need to push me so hard.
Mallory is wonderful, and so much about tonight is lovely, but she really needed to know that line.
Luckily, when she’s done crying, she seems like she feels much better. She puts the book away, as asked, and then she comes back to me. She climbs into my lap like a damn kitten, and she starts kissing me over and over and over.
This time, Mallory kisses me with purpose, with passion.
She kisses me like she doesn’t want to stop.
She kisses me like she means it, and like nothing else matters to her except this moment between us.
I want Mallory, and I take my time kissing her back, touching her soft dress, and running my hands up and down her thighs. She’s straddling me, and I touch her soft skin over and over as I play with her body, teasing her.
“Princess,” I murmur.
“Daddy.”
“You look so beautiful like this,” I whisper, pulling back to look at her. I hate how turned on I am by her smeared makeup and running mascara, but oh, she looks like a damn goddess right now. Mallory has the look of a woman who is about to make love. There’s a fire in her eyes, and I’m so very glad it’s directed at me.
“Thank you,” she whispers.
“I’d like to unbutton your dress,” I tell her.
“Okay,” she agrees easily. She kisses me, and I reach behind her to start unbuttoning the dress. I have no idea how she managed to get into the dress on her own. It’s got about a million buttons, but soon enough, I finish undoing them and I pull the little gown over her head. She’s got a pink lace bra on beneath the dress, and her breasts are up and lovely.
“Beautiful,” I whisper, stroking the tops of her breasts.
“Take my bra off, Daddy,” she says.
“Anything for you,” I agree easily. I unhook her bra and allow the fabric to fall to the ground. Her breasts pop free, and I run my thumbs over each of her nipples. They’re beautiful and tight, and I can’t wait to taste them.
Luckily, I don’t have to wait long.
I lay Mallory down on the bed and position myself beside her. I start kissing her mouth as I play with her beasts. She’s naked now: completely open for me. She’s very ready, and I’m very happy to be able to touch her and tease her.
I make my way down her body: licking, sucking. Her skin tastes perfect. Everything about her is just lovely and wonderful. She looks wanton and wild and happy.
For the first time, maybe ever, Mallory looks very, very happy.
“Please,” she whispers, reaching for me. She tugs on me, pulling me close to herself, and I’m perfectly happy to do anything she likes. I strip out of my clothing and continue teasing her, touching her. She spreads her legs, and I move between her. She groans when I start licking her. She arches her back up and thrusts her hips forward.
Okay, so Mallory has no self-confidence problems.
Good.
I want her to feel happy being wild with me.
I want her to feel content with me.
I want her to feel like she can do anything she wants because I’ll keep her safe. She can ask for what she needs, she can beg for anything she likes, and I’ll do whatever I can to give her the things that she craves. I lick Mallory over and over, teasing her clit until she’s pulsing, coming on my mouth. Oh, she feels so fucking good when she comes.
I look up to see her eyes closed: her mouth open. She groans, crying out as she orgasms, and then she smiles at me.
Good.
I feel like a damn king in this moment.
She tugs, pulling me up to her. I reach for a condom and cover my cock. I’m sure she’s on birth control, and I doubt that Mallory has anything like an STD, but we haven’t exactly had an in-depth discussion on our birth control preferences, so wearing a condom for tonight is fine. Later, we can talk about whether she’s taking something hormonal, or whether she wants to get a prescription. For now, condoms are simple and easy and they’ll make sure that there are no unintended consequences from our time together tonight.
I position myself between her legs, and she reaches for my face. She tugs me to herself, kissing me.
This is almost sweet, actually. It’s not rough or tumble or wild. It’s just...precious.
Like her.
Like this moment.
“Mallory,” I whisper.
“Please,” she says again. “Please make love to me now, Daddy. I want you inside of me.”
“How could I ever deny such a polite request?” I ask, smiling at her.
I thrust forward, pushing inside of her. Mallory tenses, but then quickly relaxes. I know it’s been a long time for her, and it’s been a long time for me, too. We’ll take things slowly tonight. There’s nothing wrong with taking our time, with teasing each other.
It’s okay for us to take things slowly so we can really and truly enjoy one another.
I start thrusting harder, and she groans, running her hands down my back. She kisses me gently, softly, almost virginally. She looks sweet and lovely.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” I murmur, kissing her.
“You feel so good,” she groans.
“Spread your legs.”
She listens, spreading her legs wider, and I sink even deeper into her.
“Fuck, baby. I’m not going to be able to last very long.”
A soft laugh escapes her lips.
“I thought you were a pro at this,” she winks. “Daddy.”
“You just feel so fucking tight,” I tell her.
“Don’t stop,” she whispers.
I couldn’t even if I wanted to.
I make love to Mallory, sweetly and perfectly in the little playroom I selected. I kiss her, grinding into her, passionately worshipping her body with my own. When I come, it’s an explosion of everything that’s happened over the last few days, and I feel like I’m going to fucking pass out from the pleasure.
I roll off of her, throw away the condom, and come back. I reach for her, pulling her close to myself, and I kiss her on the forehead.
“Mallory,” I tell her. “That was...perfect.”
“I think so, too,” she whispers. She snuggles up against me, tracing her fingers over me. I have a million thoughts racing around in my head, and I’m not quite sure how to sort them out. Being with Mallory was...comfortable. It was sweeter than I expected it to be, and more gentle. It was lovely, honestly. Being with her felt like coming home, especially after so many years of knowing her.
I’ve been with my share of women, but none of them comes close to comparing to her.
Everything about her is just...lovely.
I know that Mallory has been through a lot. I know she’s been stressed and anxious and I know she’s got her own demons that she’s fighting, but oh, I’m so very happy that I had this time to spend with her today. I’m glad we reconnected. I just hope that I’m able to show her that I’m worth her time, and worth her attention, and worth her love.
Because I want more.
I want so much more of her.
“Aaron?” She asks.
“Yes, princess?”
“I...I need to tell you something.”
Something in her voice catches my attention. I can’t quite pinpoint what it is about her tone, but she sounds just the slightest bit nervous and worried. What could she have to tell me?
“Okay,” I say, rolling onto my side so we’re looking at each other face-to-face. Fuck, if she isn’t the prettiest damn women in the world. She’s so lovely, even now. She looks well-spanked and well-fucked and well-loved.
I just hope that it’s true.
I hope she feels the way about all of this that I do.
“What is it?” I ask her gently.
“I’m not sure how to tell you this,” she whispers.
“Then just tell me.” I smile at her. I don’t think she’s going to tell me that she has a boyfriend or a girlfriend or a secret life. I don’t get the feeling that she’s going to tell me she secretly has a kid or something like that. If anything, maybe she’ll tell me that she loves me, or that she wants to be with me, or something like that.
“That was my first time,” she blurts out all at once, and then she covers her mouth quickly, as though she can’t believe she just said it.
I stare at her for a minute. My mind can’t quite seem to reconcile what she just said. Her first time?
“Your first time...at a sex club?”
“No.”
“Your first time...with a man?” I ask, shaking my head.
“My first time ever. I’ve never had sex before. That...that was my first time. I gave you my virginity.”
“Um, okay,” I say, sitting up.
Fuck.
I was not expecting that.
I wasn’t expecting her to be like “Surprise, Aaron! Here’s my V-Card!”
But I’m not sure what I did think was going to happen.
Does this really change anything between us?
Not really.
“Are you mad?” She whispers.
“I do think you should have told me. Why didn’t you?” I ask, looking over at her.
“I was embarrassed about being a virgin,” she says simply.
“If that was true, you could have found someone to sleep with easily,” I say. “I mean, in case you haven’t noticed, we’re sort of in the epicenter of a sex haven.”
She laughs nervously, but shakes her head.
“It’s not that I didn’t think I could find someone.”
“Then what?”
“I just...I always kind of thought you’d be my first. When things fell apart between us...I mean, Aaron, nobody else just ever measured up. Is that stupid?”
Stupid?
Romantic?
I don’t know.
I do know that I wish she had told me she was a virgin. I would have made the night a lot more special than I did. It was still our first time, and it was still romantic, but I’m running over the evening in my mind, and there are so many ways I could have been more gentle with her.
There are so many ways I could have softened what happened.
There’s a part of me that makes me think I should feel betrayed. She kept a pretty big secret from me, but there’s another part of me that things she owes me nothing. If this was a secret she wanted to keep, then part of me feels like I need to respect that.
Is that true?
Does this sort of secret deserve to be honored?
“It’s not stupid,” I finally say. She breathes out this huge sigh of relief, and instantly, I feel horrible. She’s been carrying this secret for a long time. I mean, who the hell is a virgin when they’re 25? She waited a long time, and then she wanted it to be perfect.
And she chose me.
She chose me to honor with this gift.
“Thank you,” I tell her. “For trusting me enough to tell me.”
“You aren’t mad?” She asks, surprised. Then her eyes narrow. “Why aren’t you mad?”
“Because, little princess,” I chuckle. “In case you’ve forgotten, I’m the Dom in this relationship. I can always spank you later.”
“Oh!” She squeaks, and then I kiss her before she can say anything else.
Chapter Eighteen
Mallory
I did it.
I finally fucking did it.
I
finally faced my fear and found an incredible man who is not only sexy and handsome, but who is sweet and kind and who really, really loves cats.
Part of me is shocked that Aaron wasn’t upset with me. I do feel bad for keeping my secret from him. Giving up my virginity was probably something we should have talked about, like, a lot before everything happened between us.
We definitely should have discussed what we wanted, and what we didn’t, and what we were hoping to get, but somehow, Aaron managed to make the night entirely perfect without even knowing just how much it meant to me.
When we walk out of the club, I ignore the people looking at me. No one is judging me here, or glaring at me, or giving me dirty looks, but they’re curious. I’m sure it has to do with the fact that my dress is completely wrinkled and my makeup is smeared. My hair’s a mess, too, but I don’t care about any of that because I’m happy.
Right now, I’m just so, so happy.
We pass my friends on our way to the door.
“Somebody had fun,” Tabitha smiles, turning to me. She’s standing with Dax, Hank, Taylor, Fiona, and Belinda. There are a couple of other people, too: Natasha, Jeffrey, and several Doms I don’t know.
“That would be me,” I say with a laugh.
“I hope you treated her well,” Taylor says, turning to Aaron, but he says it in a way that’s good-natured and kind. They know he treated me well. Any good Dom would.
“I believe my little can answer that for herself,” Aaron looks at me. He rests his arm around my waist, and tugs me close to his side. Then he lifts my chin with his hand. “What do you say, princess? Did you have fun?”
“Yes,” I squeak out, blushing. Everyone giggles and laughs.
“Good,” Belinda says. “You deserve it.”
“For sure,” Dax says. “Get it.”
“What are you all up to?” I ask, looking at my friends. “Are you going to watch any scenes?”
“Jeffrey and I are about to do a demonstration on pet play,” Natasha says. “Aren’t we, darling?” She rubs her fingers under Jeffrey’s chin, and he wiggles his entire body, smiling.
“Yes, Mistress.”
“We should go get ready,” she says. She squeezes my arm gently as she walks past me, and she gives me a look that says she knows more than I’m saying, and that she’s happy for me. That’s a good feeling.