by Jamie Knight
“Don’t give me that crap! You downed the entire bottle! You only do that when there's a guy. Do you have a secret boyfriend?”
“Not exactly,” I said, not sure precisely what was going on with Leif. Other than that I might be starting to love him, of course.
“Give me some details,” Meegan said, calming down.
“I met a guy in the park the other day. I was walking with Polly and he passed by on his bike and we kind of just hit it off.”
I felt like her eyes were melting me into the ground. I never wished I had the money to move out more than right then. Alas, I was an unemployed single mom and that just wasn’t realistic.
“His bike,” Meegan said flatly, arching her eyebrow.
“Yeah. A really nice one, actually. We went on a picnic yesterday. He had two blankets and two baskets set six feet apart. It was really neat.”
“If only he wasn’t a bum,” Meegan snarled.
“What do you mean?”
“Oh, come on. He rides a bike, in New York?”
“Yeah.”
“Is he carrying packages while he does it?”
“Not that I saw.”
“Then he’s a bum who can’t afford a car.”
There was no point in trying to argue with her. She would always dig in deep and wouldn’t let it go until I relented.
“I guess.”
“Guess nothing. Don’t let things get too serious with this loser. You’ve already been hurt by one asshole who disappeared as soon as Polly was born.”
Ouch. She never missed an opportunity to remind me.
“I know. We’re not really in a relationship. We just talk, is all. The picnic was a fun date but there is nothing more to it.”
It wasn’t really a lie. While it was mostly due to the lockdown, we hadn’t even touched each other yet.
But still - how intense and fulfilling that video-call had been, giving me more pleasure than any previous guy had ever managed to. Even though it only really came down to a very sexy conversation. I had intentionally left this part out, along with what had happened at the underground record store, with him introducing me to his friend and protecting us from the risk-takers.
“Good, it’s best if you keep your distance, and not just because of the lockdown either. You do have a daughter to think about.” She sniffed for emphasis and slammed back into her bedroom.
I hated when she did that. Using my own kid against me as though I wasn’t acutely aware that I was a mother.
It didn’t even matter anyway. Not with Leif. By all indications, he cared about Polly, and the feeling certainly seemed to be mutual.
I tried to forget about him, though. I didn’t want to, but I also didn’t want Meegan to make fun of me or lecture me anymore. The combination of her status as both a big sister and a nurse made her absolutely insufferable when she thought she was right.
I put Polly to bed, not letting the tears flow until I got to my room. Sadly slumping inside my own space, I stripped down, getting into my robe, which always made me feel better.
I saw the record Leif had bought me at the store. I put it on the desk until I could dig up my old player, wherever it might have ended up. My grandma had given it to me for my birthday years ago, some time before I could really appreciate how cool they could be.
Wonder of wonders, I actually found the thing, tucked in the back of the top shelf of my closet. After figuring out how to get it working, I put the record on, instinctively turning the volume down so I wouldn’t bother Meegan, who had always seemed to have an allergic aversion to anything cool or fun.
The music filled my head, sounding like echoed voices from the distant past, reverberating through great dark halls. I could understand, in both my mind and my bones, why Leif had chosen it for me. It was like escaping to a different realm.
I almost didn’t hear the alert. Pulling the record player’s plug from the socket, I rushed to the desk, tapping ACCEPT before my ass could hit the chair.
“Hey, pet.”
“Hi,” I said, my voice suddenly a whisper.
He did something to me where all my strength would flee, and it was like I was putty in his hands.
“Polly in bed?”
“Yeah, I put her down a while ago. I was listening to the record. The vinyl. I found my player.”
“What did you think?”
I wished so much I could have thought of something intelligent to say. How do you express such a life-changing moment?
It was like effing the ineffable. Adding insult to injury, had I been less set adrift among the metaphysical, he might not have heard what came next.
“Are you talking to that loser again? I thought you said you were done with him,” my sister’s voice hollered, loud and clear.
Leif looked like he had been punched in the stomach, though he was trying to hide it as the knife twisted.
“Leif, I—"
“I guess I’d better go,” he says.
Before I could stop him, before I could say another word, he ended the call. I looked at the paperweight I kept on my desk. Smooth and hard, made of fossilized amber.
I resisted the powerful urge to chuck it at Meegan’s head as she stood triumphant in the doorway. She smirked at me as she closed the door again.
I started writing him a message explaining that there was a misunderstanding. That I had said we weren’t together, that it wasn’t true, but that it was only to get my sister off my back, and that I wanted to talk to him. To explain everything.
I read it over before deleting it. It was all accurate, but I didn’t want Leif to have to damage his pride by talking to someone he thought wasn’t into him.
“Liff?” Polly asked when I got her out of bed.
“Sorry, baby, Leif is gone.”
“Like dada?”
“No, not at all,” I said, trying not to cry.
“Mama sad?”
“I’ll be okay, baby. How about another walk?”
“Birdie?”
“We can only hope.”
I wanted to forget about Leif. I tried pushing him out of my head, but he wouldn’t budge. I needed him so much it hurt. I had to talk to him, but it would have to be face to face. It was the only way to express how things really were.
I returned to the park for the second time today, eagerly entering what looked like the scene of Genesis. Polly’s wish was granted, with several avian friends singing their sweet tunes. We sat beneath a tree, in the warm summer sun, and waited for a man who never came.
Chapter Six - Leif
Sleep was overrated. Sure, I was fairly certain that Odin was blessing me, but I got more work done in three days than I had in the last two months. I was taking the concept of a lockdown a bit more literally than even the leaders of our government probably meant. Anything to keep from thinking about Brigid, or what she apparently thought of me. If only that were possible.
Three days of nearly solid labor, sleeping only when exhaustion overtook me, subsisting only on things I could get out of a box or a can. So focused my vision was going blurry, but there she still was. In the back of my head. Beckoning me to her. I needed to take a different tack.
I had almost forgotten what the sun was like. My heavy sunglasses were more necessary than they ever had been before. Gaining my bearings, I got on my bike and headed for the range.
The air conditioner hit like an arctic gale, chilling my bones and relieving the heat in the same instant. It was very much a mixed bag.
“What’s new, Magog?”
“The usual, please.”
Turning over my ID so the authorities could trace me should I go off, I received my lethal weapons, ready to do some damage.
“You really should have booked ahead, but there’s no one else coming in, so I’ll make an exception,” Lucy reprimanded me.
“Thanks, pal.”
“Want to talk about it?”
“It’s nothing,” I said, strapping on my quiver.
“I know you, bud. This is
not nothing. You have the same look you did before you took down that tree with the sword you made in metal shop.”
“It was a misunderstanding.”
“I’ve always wondered, what part of ‘name plaque’ sounded like ‘broadsword’ to you?”
“It was a creative interpretation,” I said, checking the balance of my string.
“That ended with two cabins being crushed by a maple?”
“No one was in them,” I reminded her.
“Which is why no charges were pressed.”
“I rebuilt them.”
“Which is why they allowed you back,” Lucy pointed out.
No matter what I tried, there was just no arguing with her. Lucy had the memory of a quiz champ.
“Remember the girl I told you about?”
“Brigid?”
“Yeah, it kind of went south.”
“You really liked her, didn’t you?”
“Yeah, I did. I’ll get over it eventually, I just need to shoot something and I’m not looking for a murder change.”
The thirtieth arrow punched into the poor, besieged target, marking the last of what would have been many death blows had the bullseye been sentient. I shook my head to try and clear away the blood I half-imagined I saw running down from the big red center circle.
It won’t get any better, you know.
The wise voice in my head that counseled me in my darkest moments had finally put in an appearance.
“I fucking know that.”
You have to talk to her, boy.
“You make it sound so easy.”
It is easy. Once you have accepted your fate.
Suddenly, I had an idea. I ran out of the range so fast I almost took my long brown bow and empty quiver with me. I had to come back to toss them to Lucy. That could have been interesting if I had encountered any police in my flight.
I looked like a madman trying to take off, without the aid of petty mechanical assistance.
I hurried to a store to buy what I needed, and then I headed to the park, where I knew I would find them.
“Balloooon,” Polly wondered, her eyes going wide.
“Did you mug a clown?” Brigid asked, trying not to laugh at my red face.
“No, but I can understand why you might ask. Here you go, little one.”
I handed the balloons to Polly, who started bouncing them happily. We three watched them twist and turn in the light breeze.
“I really missed you,” I told her.
“Me too! Missed you, I mean. Thank you for coming. I thought you’d never talk to me again and I wouldn’t blame you. I just can’t get you out of my head. It’s really weird.”
“Do you want to talk?”
“Sure. From six feet away, of course,” Brigid winced.
“Fair enough.”
“My sister is awful.”
“Oh.”
“Sorry to blurt it out like that. It just makes me so mad. I was in a pretty bad relationship before. With Polly’s dad. Meegan - that’s my sister - has never let me forget it. It doesn’t help that she’s older and Polly and I are living with her because we have no money.”
“I take it that was her on the video-call.”
“Yeah.”
“I misunderstood the situation when she said you weren’t interested?” I deduced.
“Yes. For sure. That wasn’t me talking. That was her.”
“Do you want to give it another go?”
“Absolutely.”
“I really want to kiss you right now,” I confessed.
“Me too! I mean, kiss you, of course.”
“Of course. I would also really like to see you again. On the bright side, they say we might be getting out of lockdown soon.”
“Then we can kiss all we want!”
“Wherever we want.”
She blushed adorably, and I knew things were at least getting back to how they had been a few days ago.
“Would you like to meet tonight?”
“Online?”
“Yeah, my sister will be working late. I’ll be wearing my robe.”
I could see her coming from a mile away. I had been around long enough to know when a kiss was inbound. Touching her gently on the shoulders, I pushed her back.
“Not yet, pet.”
“Yes, sir.”
“I’ll see you tonight, yeah?”
“Yes, sir,” she said with a wink, implying that I might just see all of her.
Taking the handles of the stroller, she rolled Polly away, the balloons bouncing in the air as I watched Brigid nearly skipping with joy.
I shared Brigid’s enthusiasm. Even if I wasn’t able to express it in quite the same way. My own celebration involved going home and sleeping for nearly ten hours.
I was late. As sure as the sun rises in the morning. It didn’t happen often, but everyone slips up now and then. Jumping out of bed, still in my boxers, I power-ran to my laptop and dialed her number.
“Are you okay, sir?” Brigid inquired, adjusting her camera.
“Of course, my pet.”
It struck me she thought it was part of the game. That I was testing her by making her wait for me.
“Can I move now, sir?”
“Yes.”
She almost melted, every muscle in her body relaxing at once. She had been holding her position for how long? A beatific grin spread across her sweet lips.
“Better?”
“Yes, sir,” Brigid said softly.
“Why are you still dressed?” I asked, getting into character.
“I’m sorry, sir.”
“You're forgiven. Take off your robe, pet.”
“Yes, sir.”
Quickly, her hands shaking, lovely Brigid untied the belt of her robe, slipping it from her shoulders and hanging it on the back of the chair.
“Beautiful.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“Do you want my cock?”
“Yes please, sir!”
Slowly I pulled down the front of my boxers; my cock, already hard from seeking her naked, sprinted out like a cobra. Brigid gasped at the sight of it.
“Want to suck it, my pet?” I asked, gently stroking the massive, throbbing shaft.
“Yes, sir,” Brigid replied, not taking her eyes off it for a second.
“Get on your knees,” I said, using the tone that I knew made her shudder.
“I am on my knees, sir,” she whispered, tucking them under her in her chair.
“Good, where are your hands?”
“Caressing up your thighs, sir.”
I closed my eyes and imagined her small, warm, soft hands working their way up my thighs and wrapping around my stiff cock.
“I’m stroking you now, sir,” she said.
“Good girl,” I said, stroking myself faster.
“I’m sucking your balls, sir.”
“Both at once?” I asked, pretending to be amazed.
“One at a time, sir. Alternating.”
“How are they?”
“Delicious.”
I tried to conjure the sensation of her hot little mouth on my balls, sucking gently as she caressed my cock with both hands.
“I am licking up your shaft, sir.”
“Go slow, pet.”
“Yes, sir.”
In my mind, her soft, wet, pink tongue caressed up my rock-hard shaft, making me moan quietly as I did the same motion with one hand while continuing to stroke with the other.
“I am swirling my tongue around your head, sir,” Brigid said, copying what I told her before.
“Good girl,” I praised, wanting to encourage good behavior.
“May I suck you, sir?”
“Of course you can, pet.”
I pictured her dropping her mouth down on my cock, gently sucking me, working her lips halfway along the massive shaft before having to back off a bit, but continuing to suck like a champ.
I opened my eyes so I could see her. Brigid was softly fingering
herself, already second-knuckle-deep into her beautiful pussy. She hadn’t asked my permission, but because it was thoughts of me that pushed her to such joyous abandon that I decided to let it slide.
I came in a huge rush, as was the usual. I could see Brigid nearly drooling, clearly wanting the opportunity to lick it up.
“Soon, my pet.”
“Promise, sir?” she implored.
“Yes, I promise.”
Then I was struck by a thought. A strange, beautiful thought.
“Do you have a dildo, my pet?”
“Yes, is that okay, sir? I haven’t used it since I met you.”
“I want you to go get it.”
“Yes, sir!” she exclaimed, nearly saluting.
A few moments of audible rummaging later, she returned with an impressively large, soft silicone dildo. She had also found a bottle of lube, which I certainly understood.
“Got it!”
“Good girl. Use some of that lube on your puss,” I ordered.
Without hesitation, Brigid popped the cap, squirting a healthy portion into her hand. Then she stroked it into her pussy, pushing three fingers most of the way into herself to really work it in and get herself ready for what was to come.
“Spread your legs, love. Wide.”
“Yes, sir,” Brigid whispered, her voice thick with desire.
She did indeed open her legs wide, moving so her knees were bent over the arms. Her pretty pink pussy was open and glistening.
“I am stroking the head of my cock against your pussy,” I intoned, as though whispering into her ear.
Reacting instantly, Brigid lovingly stroked the head of the dildo against her pussy, moaning in gentle ecstasy as she did so.
“Now, I am pushing slowly inside you.”
Taking a sharp breath in, Brigid started slowly pushing the dildo in between her delicate folds.
“Moan for me, honey.”
Brigid let go, moaning long and loud, letting me know exactly how good it felt having such a big thing inside her. Eventually she got the great whale of a dildo halfway into her pussy. This all was giving me a good idea of how much she would be able to take after the lockdown was finally lifted.
Gradually, following my instructions, Brigid worked up to pounding the dildo inside herself, singing hymns to the heavens as she peaked with a massive, shuddering, g-spot orgasm.
It was amazing to see her pussy spasm and quiver as she came hard for me. So amazing it made me say something I never thought would escape my lips so soon.