by Peyton Banks
“Jacob.” I had to keep him talking. “You’re right. She’s yours. I’ll back off, just let me talk to her.”
“No, you won’t.” His voice was closer to the door. “Once you’ve had a taste, you can’t just give her up. She’s the most amazing woman.”
“You’re right, but, but...” My mind raced. The gas smell growing stronger. I could have them turn it off. Or I could do it myself. It would be in the basement. Unless there was an individual gas line for each apartment. It could be in the backyard. I had no time to figure it out, and I didn’t want to leave Shani alone in there with him. “Just let me say goodbye.”
He cracked the door. The chain prevented me from pushing it open.
“See, you’re all ready to give up on her.” His eyes blinked rapidly. A maniacal look made my skin crawl. Sweat poured out of his skin. He wiped it off his brow, and it appeared a second later. He no longer wore the suit—he had on black slacks and a button-down shirt. Sweat soaked his collar and under his arms.
He shook his head at me in disgust.
“You’re right.” I placed my foot in the door. “I don’t deserve her.”
“You don’t know how much work it takes to keep a woman like her in line.” He nodded and appeared to be talking to himself. “She can be selfish and immature. She doesn’t know the first thing about being a wife. I had to teach her how to cook. How to clean. How to fuck. Jesus...” his voice trailed off as he moved away from the door.
“You should beg me not to leave you.” He screamed, but there was no answer.
“Jacob. Let me help.”
He appeared in the door. “How can you help?”
“I’ll tell her how much you love her and how much you sacrificed for her.” I nodded. “We’ve become friends. She’ll listen to me.”
“Oh, yeah?” His eyes brightened and then darkened again as he glared at me. I took a step back. “Fuck you, Oscar.” He spit my name. “You can’t have her.” From the way his voice bounced off the walls, he had moved back farther in her apartment.
“Fuck you, Oscar,” he yelled. “You don’t deserve her. If I can’t have her, then no one can, you understand.”
I stepped back and kicked the door in. It flew open and banged against the wall. I stepped inside, and I covered my mouth.
Jacob paced back and forth in the kitchen.
I scanned the apartment—Shani was nowhere to be found.
“Where is she, Jacob?” His eyes darted around the room. They landed on the pantry door for a split second before settling to the ground.
“O.” Shani’s muffled voice rang out from behind the pantry door.
“Shut the fuck up, Shani.” Jacob screamed and went back to pacing.
“No, let me out.” Shani screamed and banged on the door. I took another step towards them. Jacob had his back to the door. He clicked something in his hand.
“You want to come out, Shani.” He stepped towards the island.
“Shani. Stay where you are.” I appeared calm, but my heart raced a mile a minute. If she came out, and he struck the spark wheel, the spark itself was enough to blow the place up. With Shani in the closet, she would be protected from the blast. I said it for my benefit. Gas explosions were unpredictable. I had no way of knowing what would happen if he struck the light, except for a boom.
Shani beat on the door.
“O,” she begged, “please get me out of here.”
“Shani, listen to me.” I took a few more steps towards the kitchen. “Stay where you are. Everything’s fine out here. Jacob and I are having a talk. I’ll come and get you when we’re done.”
Shani tried the knob, and the door opened. She peeked out.
Jacob stepped into the living room. The fireplace sat in the front corner of the apartment. The gas gauges next to the fireplace turned up high. He was ready to blow us into the atmosphere.
I stood between Shani and Jacob. She placed a hand on my spine. I held a hand up to keep her from moving.
Jacob had his back towards us. He flinched at nothing and mumbled to himself as he paced in front of the fireplace. He flipped the lid of the lighter open and closed. One flick of his thumb and the spark would ignite the gas in the air.
“Think, Jacob.” He hit himself in the head three times.
I moved to the stove with Shani behind me. I shut off the gas.
“What are you doing?” Jacob walked over. “I’ll blow us up. I swear.”
“Jacob, please.” Shani stepped around me with her hands up. I pulled her back, but she shrugged me off and stepped forward. “You don’t want to die. Don’t do this.”
“Oh, I’m not afraid to die, Shani.” He laughed as tears poured out of his eyes. He turned his back on us, wiped his face on his shirt. Never missing a beat on clicking the lighter. He spun on his heels to face us again.
Jacob flipped a switch and became a new person. His stoic face held a far-off expression in his eyes.
Shani and I took a step back.
He smiled and stepped forward.
“I’m just afraid to live without you.” His thumb dragged across the spark wheel. It made a scraping noise that would haunt me for years if I lived.
“No.” I screamed. For good measure, Jacob flicked it again and threw the small flame into the fireplace.
As soon as it left his hand, I moved into action.
Shani screamed.
I pushed her inside the pantry and shut the door.
I grabbed the island, ducked behind it, and pushed it and myself towards the front door.
I got halfway before the explosion rang out. The blast wave knocked me into the wall and the island into me.
Debris and fire rained down.
My brain tried to contemplate what had happened, but gave up. I grabbed onto the island, but it fell away from the earth. I let it go and covered my head.
I opened my mouth, but no words came out.
My vision blurred, and I couldn’t take in a deep breath. I tried one more time before pain gripped the left side of my body and my world went dark.
11
Shani
I held my hands over my ears. The explosion pulled the oxygen out of the closet. Soon after, air came rushing in, a flash of white hot light flashed, and the door splintered.
I dropped to the ground and covered my head. The noise made my ears pop. Heat followed the whoosh of air. I scooted as far back in the pantry as I could. It wasn’t big, but big enough for Oscar and me to fit.
“O.” I screamed and reached for the door.
I pulled my hand back. It was hot to the touch. My elementary school fire safety lessons ran through my head. Smoke began to pour in from below the door. I had to get out of here.
I grabbed a dish rag off the shelf and gripped the door. It wasn’t too hot. I turned the knob. The door wouldn’t budge.
I’m stuck.
I tried the door again. It scraped against the frame. I pushed with my shoulder, and it moved more. I stepped back as far as the room would allow and put my weight into it. The door popped open. I yelped and my hands covered my mouth.
The apartment was on fire. Every surface had flames crawling across them. The smoke exited through the huge hole in the brownstone’s front. My living room was gone. I stepped out, the floor creaking under my feet. I held onto the door, but it wouldn’t hold me if the floor gave way.
I peeked behind it, expecting to see Oscar. My gaze skirted across the wall and found him. His body molded to the wall in a weird angle. His hands covering his head. They were black with soot.
Oh my God, please be alive.
His foot twitched.
I crouched down to the floor and crawled near the opening between us.
“O,” I yelled. His body rocked, but he’d yet to regain consciousness.
The fired crackled around me. It wasn’t threatening me at the moment, but it was only a matter of time. My stomach rolled. I clutched it and exhaled. Burned and scorched materials fell in the hole in t
he floor.
I scanned the scene. My kitchen and living room laid wayward in the apartment below.
I covered my mouth, hoping no one was hurt.
“Shani.” A strained voice rang out.
I looked over at Oscar, as he pulled himself up to his knees. He had yet to acknowledge me.
“Sha ...” I looked into the hole. Jacob laid trapped under my couch. “Shani, help me.”
The couch sat on his chest, but his body didn’t come out the other end in the right way. I cringed and clutched my stomach.
I sat back on my heels. I gripped the walls and stood up.
Jacob continued screaming and garbling my name. He was hurt bad.
I flattened against the wall, afraid to take a step farther. The hole between Oscar and me might as well be a hundred feet. I couldn’t get to him, and he couldn’t get to me. I slid back down the wall and hugged my knees to my chest. I blinked back tears, and my resolve lasted for two second before I covered my head and the tears fell.
It was my fault. If I had told Oscar about Jacob… if I hadn’t gotten involved with Oscar to begin with, he would be alive.
No.
I shook my head.
I did everything right. I got out by myself. I did what I was supposed to do. I moved to the other side of the country. I changed my name. I didn’t tell anyone about his abuse. He could have moved on. Why did he come looking for me?
I crawled to the hole in the floor.
“Why couldn’t you just leave me alone?” I screamed. “Why?” I picked up the nearest object and hurled it at him.
Jacob’s mouth moved, and his eyes blinked rapidly, but he wasn’t yelling anymore.
I reached around myself and grabbed a piece of glass. I ran my finger over the familiar pattern. I screamed and threw it. It hit him in the legs. He didn’t move.
I gasped and covered my mouth.
“Shani.”
I blinked and looked up.
The tears spilled again as I slid up the wall and stood.
Oscar was alive.
Oh, thank God.
He was alive.
I took a step towards him.
“Shani,” he held out his hand, “stop moving.”
12
Oscar
“Shani,” I yelled, I thought. Regardless, I heard my voice. I coughed and spit black tar onto the floor. My hearing would return, once the trauma disappeared. I couldn’t wait. I had to move.
The smell had returned. Burned, scorched materials and charred flesh. It was the worst and would linger in the back of my nose for days.
Another wave of nausea made my stomach turn. I gripped it and got a good reminder of my broken ribs.
When the pain subsided, I scanned my surroundings. I saw Shani. She had slid across the wall. A foot of space remained between the apartment wall and the hole in the floor. We had no way of knowing if the floor would support her.
“Shani,” I held my hand out, “stop moving.”
I reviewed the structural damage from my vantage point. The explosion was compact, but powerful. It blew a hole into the top two floors of the brownstone and out towards the front of the house. The edges of the hole chipped off and floated out onto the sidewalk.
Was anyone else hurt?
The family on the second floor had left the building as I entered. The first floor couple were on vacation. Shani on the third flood. That’s one, two people.
Jacob.
He was in the apartment. Was being the operative word. I couldn’t see him from my angle, but if he hadn’t moved during the explosion, he was somewhere under the debris.
I scooted back to the wall next to Shani. I tested the floor with every step. The floor supported my weight. I looked up.
Shani had her back flat against the wall, her hands splayed behind her.
“O.”
My heart leaped in my chest. Her mouth formed the perfect O and had me mesmerized. Her hand with the black nail polish reached out towards me. I reached out but needed another foot to reach her.
Pop!
I gripped the walls and held on. The noise came rushing into my head like a river and assaulted my senses. A woman’s whimpered, muffled conversation went on below.
“Shani.” I stepped closer to the hole in the floor.
“O.” She reached out again. Her voice sounded weird. I could have sworn she yelled, but now she whispered.
“Shani, baby. You okay?” I slid an inch at a time towards her. “Baby, I’m right here.” I reached out for her. “Are you hurt?”
“I don’t think so. Not really.” She shrugged.
The scream rang out again, it wasn’t coming from Shani or me.
“Where’s Jacob?”
She looked around and back at me. Her eyes bugged out of her skull.
“He’s hurt.” She peered down into the floor. “It’s bad. Really bad.”
Her eyes scrunched up. She pointed down.
“I ...”
“Hey, it’s okay.” I measured the distance. If I jumped, I could get to her.
“There’s fire.”
Fire. I felt it on my skin, the flames danced across the floor.
“I’m getting you out of here, okay?” I tested the floor again. “I need you to jump to me.”
She gave me the you must be kidding look. "I can't."
“Yes, you can.” I held my hands up, ready to catch her. “You have to. This floor will not hold us for much longer and the fire will spread fast.”
“O,” she whispered, and tears poured out of her eyes. “I don’t want to die.”
“Shani, trust me.” I shook my outstretched hands. “I will catch you. Now take a few steps back. Then one, two, and jump as far as you can.”
She scooted to the edge and peered over again.
“Shani, look at me.” She blinked and then caught my gaze. She nodded and took a few steps backward.
“Okay, now count.” I waved her over. “One, two, jump.”
She counted to herself. On two, she leaped into the air. The world slowed as her body passed over the hole and landed in my arms.
“Fuck.” Pain shot down my left side as she landed. I didn’t care. I had Shani in my arms.
“Are you okay?” She stepped back. I pulled her back flush with me.
“I’m fine.”
Sirens and lights bounced off the walls.
Good response time.
“You hear that.” I pushed Shani’s hair out of her face. “Help’s on its way.”
She looked back over her shoulder.
“Hey, look at me.” I gripped the side of her face. “The firemen will get to him. They will help him. Let’s get you to safety.”
She nodded, and we stumbled out the front door of her apartment. The stairs remained intact. I wrapped a hand around her waist and led her downstairs.
The fire truck had arrived, followed by two ambulances.
I waved for the paramedics. I recognized them from the station down the street.
“David.”
“O.” His eyes grew wide as he recognized me. “What the hell happened?”
I had one arm around Shani’s waist. She had yet to speak. When we reached David, she collapsed. I picked her up but almost dropped her because of the pain of my ribs. My vision slid in and out of focus.
“I got her.” I passed her into David’s arms. He carried her to the closest ambulance. He climbed in and sat her on the gurney.
“O.” The panic in her voice made me forget the pain in my side.
“Shani.” I climbed in next to David. “I’m here.”
She reached out for me. I grabbed her right hand.
“We’re going to be fine.”
She nodded and relaxed back.
David took her vitals and put an IV in her arm.
“Anything hurt?” David listened to Shani’s heart.
She didn’t answer. I turned towards her. Her gaze settled out the back of the window. It looked like a war zone broke
out on her block. The ambulance moved, and she gripped the side of the bed and flinched.
“Ma’am, where are you hurt?” David asked.
She turned to me. Her eyes as big as saucers, her face covered in soot. She reached up and touched her hair—it was scorched and sticking up all over the place. Shani was in shock.
I reached out and touched her hand.
She gasped and flinched, again.
She turned her left hand over and laid it on her lap.
“Giving her ten cc of morphine.” David injected the medicine into the IV and grabbed gauze to wrap up her hands.
“I’m so sorry,” Shani whispered. I had never been so happy to hear someone’s voice in my life.
“Hey, baby,” I squeezed her thighs, “it’s not your fault.”
“I should have told you. I...”
Shani’s mouth continued to move, but I no longer heard her.
I shook my head.
She reached for me with her now bandaged hands. Her black polish chipped. She ran a finger over the bridge of my nose. I loved it when she did it. I attempted to smile.
“O.” Her mouth formed the cute shape, but I couldn’t hear her.
I felt someone shake my right arm, and I turned my head.
My world turned upside down. I lost all feeling in my body and sunk back against the bench as my eyes rolled back into my head.
I sensed motion around me. The ambulance stopped. A voice screamed. Shani’s hand was on me, and I smiled. My smile disappeared when I lost her touch. I was lifted and rolled me away.
I reached back for her in my brain, but my body wouldn’t respond.
I screamed in my head, but no sound escaped my mouth.
I had to talk. I had to tell her.
I loved her.
I needed more time.
13
Shani
Besides my burned hands, twelve stitches on my forehead, and a few scrapes and bruised, I felt fine. I was lucky.
Oscar had collapsed in the ambulance. We pulled in the hospital, and the doctors paused for a minute, confused who the patient was they needed to treat.