“Just get out,” Samantha choked out the words. “I never want to see you again.”
She had just ripped his heart out of his chest and shredded it into pieces right before his eyes. Helplessly, he watched the one person who’d matter the most to him drift away from him forever. Suddenly, it was agonizing to remain there any longer. He felt his life being sucked out of him, and all he wanted to do was to collapse right there and then.
“As you wish, Sammy.” He kept himself together enough to give a slight nod and walk out of her life.
Fifteen
It had been a week since Samantha had left for Los Angeles. Of course, Shane hadn’t attended her going away party. In fact, he had remained true to his word and hadn’t set eyes on her since their meeting three weeks ago in her room. Both Damien and Kelsey were concerned with his withdrawn behavior, but Shane had remained quiet. He had even kept his distance from them since any memories relating to Samantha were too painful.
Shane was now forced to answer to Camille about his every move. He hated it, but he knew he had no choice but to get used to it. He told her he preferred to hunt alone, though, and that was the only time when he would get some time to himself—the solitude he desperately sought.
That night, he sat at his favorite spot on the Empire State Building, staring down below. He never noticed how far away the ground truly was. He wondered what he would do if he decided to leap off the building and his wings stopped working. Would he try to survive? Or, would he welcome his fate? Perhaps it would be a blessing.
“I always know where to find you.” Damien’s voice echoed into the still of the night. “Not good that you didn’t sense me arrive, little brother.”
Shane sighed. “Losing my touch, I guess.”
“How come we don’t see you that much anymore? You normally stop by every night. Tori and Ryan keep asking about you.”
Shane shrugged. “Just been really busy. Tell them I’ll come by one of these days.”
“You don’t look really busy,” Damien said. “I barely see you out hunting, Shane. Have you been eating regularly? Wanna tell me what’s going on?”
“Nope,” he said, standing up.
“Is this about Samantha? I really wish the two of you had gotten your closure. I know you both have a lot on your mind.”
“I don’t want to talk about her right now,” Shane said abruptly. He couldn’t even say her name.
“Okay, fair enough. Where have you been crashing during the days?”
“Camille’s,” Shane answered, knowing where the conversation was going.
“I see,” Damien said, with a heavy sigh. “What are you doing, Shane?”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“Why are you leading her on? You know you don’t care about her.”
“You don’t know how I feel, Damien.” Shane tightened his jaw, wanting nothing more than to leave.
“But I do, Shane. I know you better than you know yourself. You’re going to find yourself in a deeper mess if you don’t leave her alone. Her brothers are ruthless, trust me. And her father is one of the Master Gargoyles.”
“So, what of it? Our father is a Master Gargoyle, too. That doesn’t mean shit, does it? When’s the last time we’ve actually talked with him? He’s not allowed to interact with his own sons. What kind of crap is that?”
“This is not about our father. Stick with the topic. Why are you with this female you care nothing about? I know you’re not telling me everything. What happened when you went to meet with Camille and her brothers after the Vegas incident?”
“I told you I’d fix it. Well, it’s fixed,” Shane answered. “I don’t want to talk about this, Damien.”
“Too bad. You’ve been moping around for the last several weeks. I’ve given you space to work it out yourself. But frankly, both Kelsey and I are worried about you. Tell me what’s going on, and maybe I can help.” Damien placed his hand on Shane’s shoulder.
“There’s nothing anybody can do. Not a damn thing. I’m stuck in this mess, but it’s my mess, so I’ll deal with it.” Shane was bitter, but he didn’t want his brother to carry his burden.
“What are you stuck in? What happened? You know I won’t leave you alone until you start talking.”
Shane sighed. Damien was right. He was too damn stubborn, and once he made up his mind, he wasn’t going to change it. Shane knew he had to tell him what happened. Turning to face his brother, he said, “I took The Oath, Damien. That was the deal. They said they wouldn’t harm Sammy if I took The Oath for Camille. They gave me a year to claim her as my mate.”
Damien stepped back in shock. “What the hell! Why did you do it? You should have come to me. We would have handled them!”
“No, I couldn’t come to you. They wouldn’t let me leave until I took The Oath. I couldn’t take on all four of them myself. And at that time, all I was worried about was Sammy’s safety. You know they would crush her without a second thought.” Shane clenched his fists just thinking about it.
“You don’t love Camille. This is a huge mistake,” Damien said, frowning.
“I despise her, Damien. She saw an opportunity to trap me and ran with it. But again, they left me no choice. They wanted me to claim her as my mate right then and there. I bought myself some time by taking The Oath instead.”
“This is crazy. Maybe we can go to The Council and tell them what they did.”
“No, we can’t. All of my past extracurricular activities would come to light, and the punishment would be severe. You know they’d do a thorough investigation until they were satisfied. Most gargoyles that know me are well aware of my affairs with the human females. If The Council found that out, there would be no mercy. Not to mention, they’d probably make me claim Camille as my mate anyway.”
“Shane, there’s gotta be a way out of this,” Damien mumbled as he paced back and forth.
Shane smiled, but his eyes remained distant. “Let me know if you come up with something.”
“Does Sammy know?” Damien asked.
Shane took a shaky breath. “Yeah, I told her. I didn’t tell her the details, but I did tell her about The Oath and explained about claiming a mate. I explained to her it was kind of like being engaged.”
“Damn! What did she say?”
“She told me to get out, and she never wanted to see me again.” Shane shrugged his shoulders. “Ahh well, easy come, easy go.”
“You can play tough all you want, Shane, but like I said, nobody knows you better than me. You need to tell Sammy the truth…that you did it to protect her.”
“No!” Shane yelled. “I never want her to find that out. I would rather she’d hate me and live a fulfilling life than carry the guilt or live in fear. No, she absolutely must not find out. This is my choice, Damien. Promise me, right now.”
“Calm down, Shane. I’m just trying to look out for you. You’ve made this sacrifice, but at what expense? You’ll be miserable your entire life.”
“If my misery keeps her alive and safe, then I’ll stay miserable for a million years with a smile.”
“Noble words, but I’m not giving up. There has to be some way to get you out of this mess.”
“Like I said, if you think of anything, I’m all ears. In the meantime, I gotta go back to Camille’s before she sends a search party after me.” With that, Shane spread his wings and dove off the building.
For the next several months, Shane did what he could to keep Camille content. If she wanted him stay at her quarters every day, he stayed at her quarters. If she wanted him to accompany her to any social gatherings, he accompanied her. If she wanted him to have sex with her, he had sex with her. He got through each night like a robot. There were no feelings involved, no passion for anything. He just saw each demand as part of his chores…fulfilling his obligation.
Sixteen
“Did you hear how Sammy is becoming a big star in LA?” Kelsey asked one night when Shane was visiting them.
He
immediately stood up, ready to leave. He had no desire to discuss Samantha with anybody. As he was heading out, he asked, “Is she? I’m not surprised. She is very talented.” In reality, of course he knew she was getting big. He had been keeping his eyes and ears open for any news of her. He searched her on Google every night, and just last month, there was an article about her in People magazine as an up-and-coming artist to watch.
“It’s been six months since she’s been out there.” Kelsey kept talking, ignoring that Shane was trying to leave.
“Has it? Time flew, huh? Listen, I gotta head out. Maybe I can catch Damien and Ryan while they’re hunting.” Shane knew exactly how long Samantha had been gone. To be exact, it had been six months and four days. How could he not know that? Getting through each night without her was a miracle, and he was proud of himself for somehow making it through.
“Shane, wait,” Kelsey said, stepping in front of him to stop him from leaving. “I think you should go out there to see her. You know, just check on her. How she’s doing and all that.”
Shane stared at her with disbelief. “I know Damien has told you everything, Kelsey. She had made it very clear she never wanted to see me again.”
“I know, but she was upset at that time. Sometimes we say things we don’t mean when we’re upset.”
“I disagree in this case. Trust me, she can’t stand me. I promised her I’d leave her alone. Besides, Camille would never let me go. Are you kidding me?”
“Why does Camille have to know anything? Just tell her you need some time to go away for a bit. I don’t know, make something up.”
“Why are you doing this?” he asked as he sighed in frustration.
“Doing what?” Kelsey asked, acting innocent.
“You’re not helping,” Shane mumbled.
“To be perfectly honest, you have been pathetic lately. You’ve been moping around, barely interacting with anybody. You’re not even living, Shane. You’re just existing. Frankly, I’m tired of you walking around like a freakin’ zombie.”
“Thanks,” Shane said sarcastically.
“I’m being dead serious. Ever since your falling out with Sammy, you’ve been lost.”
“She was a huge part of my life, Kelsey. She’s gone now, so of course I’m gonna be lost without her.”
“Then do something about it. Go over there and see her. I think you need to see Sammy one more time to give you both some closure. A lot of things were said last time because emotions were high. But it’s six months later now. Sammy is not the kind to hold grudges. Besides, I know she felt very close to you. I bet she misses you, but is too stubborn to admit it.”
“It’s out of the question. You already know about The Oath.”
“The Shane I know doesn’t care about stupid rules like that.”
“That Shane is dead. That Shane got me into this mess in the first place.” He sighed, frustrated with Kelsey.
“Then you find that Shane. You need his courage more than ever right now. I’m asking you to see her one last time for your own sake. What do you have to lose?” Kelsey did not back down.
“This conversation is over. I’m heading out now.” Shane swung the door open to depart.
“Fine, you can be stubborn all you like. But if you’ll look deep within your heart, you’ll know I’m right. The question is, do you have the guts to do that?” Kelsey followed him out the door.
“Goodnight, Kelsey,” Shane said before disappearing into the darkness.
Seventeen
The more Shane thought about what Kelsey was saying, the more he began to convince himself that maybe she was right. Maybe he could just go there and feel out the situation. He knew Samantha had a big concert over the weekend, and he would love to hear her singing live again. Her singing always soothed his soul, and perhaps that was exactly what he needed. If things didn’t feel right, he could always leave without speaking with her. She’d never have to know he was there. At least it would help him to know firsthand how she was really doing.
He knew it would take him at least two full nights to make it there on time for her Saturday night performance. As soon as he made the decision to go, his mood lifted. He would wait to leave until the next night. That way, he’d have the full night to travel. Shane wasn’t going to worry about Camille. He’d done everything she had requested of him. She would just have to understand him wanting to get away for a week or so. Even gargoyles with mates got away from one another occasionally.
The rest of the night, he was nervous and excited. Now that he’d made up his mind what he was going to do, the next night couldn’t come fast enough.
As predicted, Camille questioned where he was going when he told her the next night he’d be leaving for a week. “I don’t understand why you’re leaving for so long.”
“You know I like to get away and explore the country on my own once in a while. It’s my thing. What’s the big deal? I’ll be back in a week.” Shane said, trying to leave. He decided he’d just grab some of Damien’s clothes, so Camille doesn’t get too suspicious about why he was taking human attire.
“You don’t know where you’re going?”
“Nope, I never do. I go wherever my wings take me.”
“I don’t like it,” she complained.
“Look, Camille. You’re making me feel claustrophobic. I’ve been trying to meet you halfway here, but you’ll have to do your part, too.” Shane didn’t want to explain anything more to her. All he wanted was to be on his way. Before she could question further, he flew out of the window.
Once he was truly heading toward LA, he cherished his solitude. He finally felt relaxed, being away from the pressures that had been placed on him. The fact that he was on his way to see Samantha made him fly even faster.
He crashed at the gargoyle headquarters that were on the way as needed. The travel went quick, but at the same time, not quick enough. By Friday around four in the morning, he’d landed at the headquarters near Los Angeles. Gargoyles were good at making sure there were headquarters located by most major cities. Now that he was in the same city as Samantha, Shane couldn’t wait to see her. He knew it was too close to dawn to risk trying to find her, though. He just had to stay patient through one more day.
When he woke up Saturday night, Shane’s heartbeat was already racing. He knew exactly where Samantha’s concert was, and grabbing his backpack full of human clothes, he flew out to finally find her.
Although the concert had already started, Shane was able to sneak in easy enough. He simply used his gargoyle gifts to convince the man who was checking tickets to let him in. When he heard Samantha’s angelic voice echo through the hall, his legs nearly collapsed from under him.
Shane sunk into the empty seat in the back. His eyes were glued to the stage at the one girl who had turned his life upside down. He ignored the almost ten thousand fans screaming for her. He didn’t pay attention to the band members playing their instruments and the background singers. The different colors of light flashing on stage for special effects faded away in the background. In that moment in time, his entire being was focused on the girl that was his world.
Shane was sure his heart stopped beating at the sight of her. She was wearing a maroon mini-dress that clung to her body like a glove. Her brown hair was down in loose curls, and Samantha commanded that stage.
So many times, he’d watched her perform, but never like this. Samantha had the crowd wrapped around her finger as she sang, danced, and moved her hips to the music. Not once did she falter. A sense of pride consumed him as he watched the once little girl fulfilling her dreams.
A memory came to him when she was only fourteen years old. They had been at Damien’s home one night, and while everybody was inside, Shane and Samantha were in the backyard.
“You know I’m going to be a famous singer one day, right?” she had asked while they were watching for a shooting star.
“I’m sure you’ll be very famous. I’ve heard you sing. But, will you reme
mber us little folks when you’re big and famous?” he had teased.
“What are you talking about? You have to come to all of my concerts once I’m famous. Promise me, Shane. I’ll get you the front row tickets. You’ll be there, right? You won’t miss any? Promise?” Samantha had placed her hand on her hip, waiting for him to agree.
Shane had laughed. “I promise you, I’ll do the best I can to not miss any of your shows.”
“No, that’s not good enough. You have to be there. Promise!” she had insisted.
“Sammy, you’ll shine with or without me there. You’re very gifted, and I know once the world hears your voice, they’ll fall in love with you. You probably won’t even remember this conversation when you’re that big.”
Samantha had gasped. “That’s not true. You’re my best friend. I’d always want you by my side. I need you there. When I sing on stage, I’ll be singing to you. So, promise me right now,” she’d commanded.
Shane had ruffled her hair, playing with her. “Okay, knucklehead, I promise.”
True to his word, Shane had attended all of her shows—even if Samantha had no idea—until she moved away to Los Angeles. If he had it his way, no distance would have stopped him from watching her perform. But, when Samantha had demanded to leave her alone, he was left with no choice.
“Thanks for coming out here tonight, guys. Your support means the world to me,” Samantha spoke into the mic. “This next number is dear to my heart. It’s an oldie, but a goodie by one of my favorite artists. Hope you enjoy it.”
As the crowd went wild, Samantha began to sing It Must Have Been Love by Roxette. Shane could see she was revealing a part of herself to the world with that song. It was raw and beautiful. She put all of her feelings into that song, holding nothing back.
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