by Lila Felix
ABOVE ALL—DO NOT GET CAUGHT TRAVELING.
Collin and I were scouring the few books Colby had managed to swipe from Pema when I felt her flash again.
She’d flashed back to Louisiana, but not to her home. My phone rang and I reached to answer it.
“Hello?” I expected the voice of Colby on the other end, but instead I got Ari, her raspy voice was undeniable.
“Colby’s here, but I expect you already know that. She’s really, really quiet. And she’s eating cake. She will be along soon. I’m not sure how soon, but she’s safe.”
“Good. She loves cake. Keep me updated, okay?”
“Yeah.” And with that, Ari hung up. Those were my clues. The most obvious thing she clued me into was simply in her calling me. Ari didn’t call me and I didn’t call Ari. It just didn’t happen.
And Colby was never quiet. She even talked in her sleep. Colby didn’t eat cake at her own birthday party. Though maybe that part was true. Since she’d learned that mind over matter thing from Pema, she may have changed her mind.
Either way, these things added up to Colby being very upset.
But, she hadn’t come to me.
That was the worst part. After everything, she still ran to someone else instead of me. When would she learn that there was no one on Earth who could love her like I could?
I didn’t have time to wonder why or to let it fester. I had to figure out what my purpose was. Because without my purpose, nothing made sense.
Finding nothing in the other texts, I lost hope until I picked up the last one. It couldn’t be seen under the others because of its tiny size. My back and neck ached, but I pressed on. The book was small, dark burgundy, and leather bound with a matching leather tie. From the side, some of the pages could be seen. A lot of them were torn and some warped.
Colby was always one to talk about the smell of older books, but it wasn’t until I opened this particular one that I noticed how pungent a book smell could be. It carried the smell of spices along with—woman. The smell of flowers came through the most.
It’s been seventy-three days since Eivan travelled to the other side. He stays for a longer period of time every time he goes. I can’t blame him. If I could go and get a glimpse of the other side, I would. I’d give anything to be able to flash like him—to go the places he can—to do the things he can. He won’t take me with him. I’ve begged.
Instead, I have to sit here, at the mercy of the Synod who watch me constantly. I am forced to endure their threats. I fear one day they will be a lot more than threats. But I have no power over the Eidolon, despite the fact that he is my husband. They say I am a shame to the Lucent people. They say I should’ve moved aside when I found out he was the Eidolon, so that a proper Lucent wife could travel with him.
But no one can help how they are born—not even the perfect Lucents.
Each time they visit, they get sneakier, pushier—they are looking for something and I just don’t know what it is. For all they know, Eivan has not returned since he first flashed to the other side so many years ago.
I’ll die before I tell them where he is.
I can’t even imagine what they’d do with such a key.
The voices had come back when I opened the book. I didn’t even have to read it. The voices read it to me. Sometimes overlapping, sometimes speaking all at once. It was like being invaded with a thousand radio stations. They read the Portuguese to me word for word until I closed it.
It seemed that every time the voices came back, they multiplied exponentially.
Sevella was from Portugal? How did I miss that? More facts that flippantly landed in my lap and had no meaning. Nothing actually meant anything. It was like being given a treasure chest with a key that didn’t fit.
“Where did he go?” I became intrigued and yelled at the book. I flipped through the pages until an imprint of my thumb curved the corners of the journal upward. But as soon as my hands left the book, the voices faded. Whatever they needed me to know was connected to that book.
Yet, I found no information to give me anything but more questions.
By the time the sun fell in the hotel room, I was nowhere closer to the answer than I had been at the beginning. Collin had fallen asleep on his bed with one of the other books still clasped in his hand. He’d studied as hard as I had, if not harder. There was something he wasn’t saying. People don’t just follow other people blindly. I was at least twenty years his younger. To him, I should’ve been just a punk kid who showed up at his door with a pompous attitude and a head full of ego-bloated ideas.
“Is there something I should know about?” Colby’s voice rang close. Just the relief to have her back caused my eyes to close and revel in her nearness.
“You tell me, Querida. You’ve been gone. And I had to talk to Ari. Not the best combination. Are you okay?”
She blew out a great sigh. Without looking at her, I knew her hands were on her hips—her pouting lips were swishing back and forth, picking her words.
“I will be. I can’t tell you everything yet. It’s too fresh in my head—too raw. What I can say is that they said something about Portugal and Pema. I don’t know in which order, but we should be prepared to go there. There are so many things that don’t make sense, Theo.”
“There are some things I need to tell you as well. I’m just so tired. I haven’t done anything but sit here all day, but I’m exhausted.”
“Did you eat, Theo? I know how you get.”
I thought about her inquiry. I hadn’t eaten all day. But there were so many more things at stake than a missed meal.
“I just want to sleep. Can we just sleep?”
“Sure.”
She walked over to Collin, tiptoeing all the way. First she slipped the text from his hand. After putting the book down, she pulled a blanket over his monstrous form. He stirred a bit, but soon drifted back to sleep.
We went back to our own room, and I stripped down to my boxers, wanting to get into bed as soon as possible. Colby ducked into the bathroom and came out with a different pair of my boxers, rolled at the waist, coupled with the same shirt she had on before. The black gunk she used to rebel against the Synod clung to her eyes, but not nearly as much as it had before. Secretly, I loved it when she piled on the black stuff. It made her eyes seem twice as big.
We both took our respective sides of the bed. The routine was so normal, so everyday. We’d curled up like this an infinite amount of times. The window to the hotel room was open. Music and laughing people could be heard in the city below us.
It was strange how when everything was frazzled in your life—the world just continued. It shouldn’t continue. It should stop when our lives do and take notice.
“That should be us. We should be in the streets, enjoying life together. Sometimes this ability doesn’t seem like a gift at all. Sometimes it seems like false freedom.” I whispered more to the dark than to Colby. I could feel her take a deep breath with her back against my chest.
“One day it will be. That’s all I want.”
“Tell me what you want, Querida. Tell me all of it.” Her hair moved as the motion of my whisper floated across it.
“Just go to sleep, Theo.” Her voice drifted with the last words.