Which meant that Amias had not known Kyle as well as he thought he had.
And it also meant that perhaps he had been wrong about Cat for the past eighteen years.
But it didn't change anything. Kyle was still dead. Cat had still loved Kyle.
And when Cat had left the hospital with her baby, eighteen years ago, she had apparently decided she had no place in her life for Amias. Not even as a friend.
Her mobile number had clearly changed because the one he had no longer connected. His notes through her front door had been ignored. She had returned his letters, unopened. She had refused to see him every time he went to Devon Villa. And finally she had threatened to contact the police and accuse him of stalking and harassment unless he left her and Kyra in peace.
It had taken him a while. But he had finally got the message. Cat Devon didn't want him in her life. She couldn't even bring herself to tell him to his face. She had got her mum and her gran to do it all for her. They had given him her messages. They had delivered her threats. They had probably been the ones to put his unopened letters back in the post to him, on her behalf.
And yet here he was, after all these years, and more failed relationships behind him than he could count on both hands, still thinking about Cat Devon. Still as much in love with her as he had always been.
And only last Sunday morning, after telling Natalia what had happened on Saturday night, he had wondered if there would ever come a day when, even once, he could hold Cat in his arms and believe for just a moment that somewhere in the dim and distant future they might one day be together.
But he'd been too scared to say those words out loud. Or to let himself think of it again. And when Cat had walked in to the museum today, yet again he'd said the wrong thing. And once again they'd rowed.
What the hell was wrong with him? Instead of getting closer, they were moving further apart.
Perhaps the man in the faded photo in Viola's trunk, the one he'd now got on his phone, could close that gap. Perhaps he could help them heal their differences and finally put the past behind them. If so, the sooner he found out who this man was, the better life might be for all of them. Well, certainly for him.
Chapter Eleven
'When I was young,' Mary said, after taking several swigs of wine from the glass Kyra had handed her. 'Gladys, Annie, Gina and I, together with some of the other teenagers from the village, some of whom you know, and some no longer with us, all used to hang out together. We often spent our summers in the bay, or at Wyntersleap Reservoir. Alwick, like Amias, loved water sports. And, like Amias, he was rather good to look at. But he was from the wrong side of the river and at first I refused to have anything to do with him. In those days, the only houses there were that awful fishing hut-type place where Alwick lived, and two other semi-derelict cottages. One where Kyle's father was brought up and one in which an elderly couple lived until they died and left it empty.'
'Why was it 'the wrong side of the river', Gran?' Kyra asked.
'Because a couple of centuries ago, there was nothing but a hospital there and it was said that the hospital was for lepers. It was run by monks, who also owned Merriment Farm, but the farm is further up. The hospital caught fire, was razed to the ground and never replaced. Until Alwick's ancestors and a couple of others somehow got the land and built their shacks there. But the villagers wanted as little as possible to do with those people. It was thought the land was cursed.
'But not the farm?' Cat queried. 'Or The Hope and Anchor pub, which has been there for centuries?'
Mary shook her head. 'No. Just the site of the hospital. And those three parcels of land on which it sat and where it had its physic gardens in which the monks grew medicinal herbs and such. Two of the parcels were owned by someone not from around here; the one Kyle's family rented and the one the elderly couple lived on. But they have since been sold and there are three houses there now. The third parcel is still owned by Alwick Wells.'
'I think if the monks grew medicinal herbs on the land, it would be a good place to live, not the wrong side at all,' Kyra said. 'Were there really lepers in the hospital?'
'I don't know. There's nothing wrong with the land though. You're right about that. When the owners of the other two parcels sold theirs, soil samples were taken by the developers for some reason and the land was given a clean bill of health. Alwick was approached to sell his land. But he refused.'
'Good for him,' Kyra said.
'So you and several others hung out together,' Cat said, eager to get to the point. 'And something happened between you and Alwick?'
Mary nodded. 'Eventually, yes. We fell in love. Although, if I'm completely honest, he was more in love with me than I was with him. And if Mother had known then what was going on, I'd have been locked in my room and never let out again. I think for me, that was part of the excitement. Doing something I knew I shouldn't. Being with a boy I knew Mother wouldn't want me to be with. We had a relationship for a while.'
'A sexual relationship?' Kyra asked, screwing up her nose.
'Yes. And I'd be grateful if every time you mention sex in relation to me, you wouldn't pull faces.'
'Sorry, Gran.' Kyra grinned at Cat. 'I don't mean to.'
'What then?' Cat asked.
'Then I met your father.'
Cat sat up straight, took several gulps of wine and one of Mary's hands in hers and prepared herself.
'He was gorgeous. Incredibly rich, or so we all thought at the time, and completely out of my league. He was a few years older than me. And, I'm ashamed to say, married with a young son of his own.'
'Mum!'
'I know it was wrong, Catherine. But I couldn't help myself. I believed him when he said he wasn't happy. I believed he wanted to leave his wife, even though I knew he probably couldn't. Or maybe wouldn't. I believed he loved me. Perhaps he did. I ended things with Alwick and he took it rather badly. I think I said some things I shouldn't. About him being poor and that I wanted more out of life than to live in a hovel. I was very cruel and he never forgave me. He turned to Gina, more out of pain than love, I believe. And when I told him that I would never return to him, no matter what, he married Gina. Whether to spite me or himself, I have no idea. And I didn't care. I was in love and I was happy. Amias was born and Gina, Alwick and I never spoke again. I continued my affair and then, almost two years later, I fell pregnant with you. I was eighteen at the time. Just nineteen when you were born. Not much older than you were, Catherine, when you had Kyra. And all hell broke loose.'
'I know that feeling.'
'Yes. Well. I'm not proud of the way I behaved with you, Catherine when you told us the news. But it brought back so many awful memories of what I went through, that I really thought the best thing for you would be, either to not have Kyra, or to give her up for adoption.'
'So what happened, Gran?' Kyra asked. 'Was Granny Viola furious?'
'Livid. Mainly because he was married. That seemed to be the worst part as far as she was concerned. But also because, when it became apparent that he had no intention of acknowledging you were his, we had to deal with all the talk, and rumours, and such. And we weren't wealthy. We would have had to sell the house. Then his mother came to see us and said that if I would tell people that you were someone else's child, she would give us a fairly large sum of money which would mean we wouldn't have to worry about finances again. I believe she made him sell some properties they owned because it transpired that the family were asset rich but cash poor. Anyway, that's what we agreed. And Granny Viola may have said a few things that made people think you were Alwick's child. I never said it. But people assumed. And he hated that I would never deny it.'
'Bloody hell, Mum! That is truly awful. Alwick was married too. And he had Amias. How could you do that? How could Granny Viola?'
'It was wrong, I know. But a few people knew about me and your father and we had to say that you weren't his. It was part of the agreement, you see. And yes. I know that was also wrong, but we di
d what we did and we can't undo it now. At the time I harboured hopes that your father would change his mind. That he would one day acknowledge you. I was still in love with him, you see. Deeply in love. I would've done anything for him. Anything at all. Even when I discovered that he and his wife had had another son just weeks before I gave birth to you. They were still very much together, it seemed. But a few years afterwards, she left him. And a few years after that, he died.'
'That's awful. But you still haven't told us who he was, Gran,' Kyra pointed out.
Mary closed her eyes and sucked in a long, slow breath.
'And I can't. I really can't. Not yet. Not while Mother is in a coma. Please remember that once I tell you, there is no going back. We signed an agreement, so this is a serious matter, even now.'
'Wait. So you're saying that you still won't tell me?' Cat was even more annoyed by this than she had been by the injustice to Alwick, Gina and Amias. Or by Mary's sad tale. 'But once Granny Viola regains consciousness, you will?'
Mary nodded. 'Yes. I'll tell you then. Assuming she agrees.'
'Oh come on, Mum. That's so unfair.'
'Life is unfair, Catherine. Haven't you learnt that yet?'
Cat glared at her. 'And what if Granny Viola doesn't pull through?'
'Then I'll tell you. But I hope you'll respect the fact that by doing so, I could bring down a family's wrath upon us all.'
'A family? The mother is still alive?'
'Very much so.'
A sudden realisation hit Cat. 'Wait. You said my father and his wife had two children, didn't you?'
Mary nodded and held Cat's astonished stare.
'So I have two siblings?'
Mary nodded again. 'Who have no idea you exist. And knowing them, would probably like to keep it that way. As I said at the start, Catherine. If I tell you who your father was, it will impact on other people's lives. This is not just about us. I'll have to trust that you won't do anything rash and that neither of you will tell anyone else about this, for now. We signed a legal document, remember.'
'I can't believe you've kept this from me. That I have siblings, I mean. I always assumed I was an only child.'
'To all intents and purposes, you are. And I had no choice.'
'Of course you had a choice. We all have choices, Mum. I don't know if I can make you that promise. I think I have a right to meet them. To tell them who I am and for us all to get to know one another.'
'Why? What difference does it make? You've lived a good life without knowing them and they've definitely lived good lives without knowing you. And they may think you just want to see what you can get. They may not want to know you exist. This isn't just about you, Catherine, as I said. Please, please wait until we see what happens with Granny Viola. Please just wait until then. I'm begging you, Catherine.'
Mary looked genuinely distraught and as hurt and angry as Cat was, Mary was right. This wasn't just about what she wanted.
'I need to think about it.' Cat glared at Mary. 'Because I'm not sure I can make you any promises. And I'm not sure Kyra can either.'
'I think I can. I don't feel strongly about it. I suppose that sounds weird to you, Mum, but I don't. I've lived without knowing about them until now. And you've never been that hung up about knowing who your dad was either, Mum, so why is it such a problem now?'
'Because now I have siblings, and that makes a difference. Quite a big difference. Once I know who they are, I can't promise I won't want to meet them. If I don't know, it will eat away at me. But the last thing I want is to potentially upset other people's lives. This is a really important decision. And I don't know what to do for the best.'
Chapter Twelve
'I'm not sure I really want to be here,' Cat said as she and Kyra crossed the bridge and walked towards the bonfire. It was on the piece of common land on the other side of the river, just a little inland from where the hospital had once sat.
'But you have to be here, Mum. This is a big event in the calendar of Merriment Bay, Gran said. The bonfire and fireworks are held to remember all those from the village who died in wars over the centuries, including the first and second world wars and all the earlier ones too. There'll be dancing and food and drink. And it's also Marcus' last night here before he goes off to uni.'
'I know all that. But I haven't seen Amias since that day I stormed out of the museum and I don't want to see him tonight. Are you sure he's going to be flying his vintage Spitfire and that he won't be here for hours?'
'Yep. Because Lucas told me Amias always cleans it after a flight and before he puts it away, or whatever it is you do with planes. And the museum row was over a week ago and I told you, when I saw him a couple of days after that day, he said he hoped he hadn't upset you and that he was sorry if he had. Plus he's been trying to find out all he can about the man in the photo. So there's clearly no hard feelings on his part. If you really don't want to see him, you can make sure you're gone before he arrives but can't you just let it go and try to be friends? Haven't we got enough bad feelings between you and Gran without you and Amias having this ongoing row?'
Cat sighed. 'I'm sorry things are awkward at the house. But every time I look at Mum I feel angry, and hurt and betrayed. And although Jeremy has been all sweetness and light since that day we conned him into making breakfast and falling foul of Mum's wrath, I still get a feeling there's something not quite right about him. I shouldn't have come here tonight. I'm not in the mood for a party.'
'That's precisely why you should be here. A party is exactly what you need. It's what we both need. Visiting Granny Viola isn't getting any easier. There's still no sign of improvement and I'm not an idiot. I've seen the doctors looking at her and at you and Gran and me as if they're saying it'll soon be time for us to make a decision about her. I know that's also playing on your mind. You've got so much going on in your head I'm astonished you can sit and paint as you have been.'
'That's the only thing that keeps me sane at the moment, sweetheart. Well, that and having you here. I don't think I could've coped with any of this if you'd gone off to university in September. Perhaps you should've gone to Oxford. They seem to have shorter terms.'
Kyra grinned. 'And much harder courses and higher entry requirements. I'm bright but I'm not as bright as Marcus. Nowhere near. I'll miss him when he's gone. But he's coming back here for Christmas. His mum and dad are going to be staying at Lucas'. Well, William and Abigail's but you know what I mean.'
'That's something to look forward to. And in the meantime, you've got Lucas to keep you company.'
'Yep. And there they are.'
Cat walked towards the group and waved at William and Abigail whom she'd finally during the week.
'Hi Abigail. How are you? Sad to be saying goodbye to Marcus, I expect.'
Abigail laughed. 'Yes. But actually wishing he was taking this one with him.' She ruffled Lucas' hair and although he moved away from his mum, he smiled good-naturedly.
'It's chilly tonight. What a good thing there's a bonfire. I'm surprised the Spitfire will be flying tonight though. The sky's clear but will we see the plane going over or just the lights?'
Abigail gave Cat an odd look. 'The Spitfire doesn't fly at night. As you said. You wouldn't really see it. Unless Amias did one of those vapour trails which he sometimes does in the summer. But no. Not tonight. And speaking of Amias. There he is.'
Abigail waved over Cat's shoulder and Cat froze on the spot. She shot a look at Kyra who shrugged her shoulders and grinned, mouthing the words, 'Sorry, Mum', before walking off with Lucas and Marcus.
Cat was going to kill her later. But first she had to find a way to get out of here before Amias joined them.
'Hi Abi. Hello Cat.'
Too late. Too bloody late.
She shoved her shoulders back and stuck out her chin, turning to face him with a fixed smile on her lips.
'Hello Amias, I hadn't realised you would be here.'
He raised his brows and looked her up and do
wn. Her heart leapt to her throat but she kept the smile firmly in place.
'Really? I always come to village events and I specifically told Kyra I would be here. I was hoping to see you.'
'I'll leave you two to it,' Abigail said. 'I need to check on the food.'
'See me? Why?' Cat hardly heard Abigail and was still dissecting Amias' meaning.
'Apart from the fact that I like seeing you, I wanted to tell you I think I know who your mystery man is.'
'Mystery man? What mystery man? You mean my dad? You've known all along, haven't you and you've kept it to yourself?'
He looked stunned. 'Your dad?' He glanced around as if worried they'd be overheard. 'I wasn't talking about him. I was talking about the man in the photo. The faded photo of the RAF pilot you found in amongst the letters in Viola's trunk.'
'Oh him!' Cat screeched. 'I thought you meant …'
'Obviously,' he said as her voice trailed off. 'Has Mary told you? About your dad, I mean?'
'Yes and no. It's difficult.'
'I can imagine.'
'But you do know who he is? His actual name, I mean?'
'Your dad?' He lowered his voice even more.
She lowered hers. 'Yes.'
He moved closer and whispered in her ear. 'Yes, Cat. I know his name.'
His warm breath made her ear lobe tingle and sent shivers up and down her body. She had visions of him whispering other things in her ear. She dismissed them as fast as she could, coughed and stepped away from him.
'Mum still refuses to tell me. But apparently, I have siblings. Two, in fact. Did you also know about them?'
He held her gaze and nodded. 'Yes. I know.'
Cat sucked in a breath and pursed her lips. So he knew everything about her. Who her dad was. That she had siblings. For some reason, that made her even more cross with him.
Sparks Fly Page 6