“As for Wickham, that bloody cad, whose pockets are always to let. I should have both cut him off and exposed him years ago! I should have prevented him from being able to ruin so many girls. Now, because of past mishandling, we will be related to that bloody leech! He and his trollop of a wife will take the piss if you bloody let them. Better you do what I have and ban him at least from your homes.
“I thank my lucky stars for Elizabeth every day! She was the only one who brought me to point non-plus! I would not have changed my behaviour if she hadn’t. She was right to have refused me! I’m not so sure that she wouldn’t still be bloody right to have refused me again!
“I’m sorry, Bingley, I have been such a bloody selfish bastard! I don’t know why you have remained friends with me.
“I love Elizabeth so much! I do not deserve her! How either you or she can forgive me, I do not know!”
During Darcy’s tirade, Bingley had silently poured them a glass of scotch each and handed one to Darcy. Darcy now gulped down the amber liquid, grateful for the burn as it went down his throat. The smoothness of the amber liquid helped to sooth his tortured brain.
“How much of what you’ve shared does Elizabeth know?” Bingley asked.
“All of it and more. There are some small details that Elizabeth doesn’t yet know, but yes, Elizabeth knows all of it.”
“Then if you cannot tell me the details, as some of it as you’ve said you cannot, then talk to her! For the rest you have my unending support, you know that!”
Talking about the past year, and his past missteps brought a sense of relief to Darcy. Such that now the floodgates were opened there was no end to the conversation between them. Bingley’s calm demeanour and positive outlook brought a fresh perspective to Darcy.
The end comes when we no longer talk with ourselves. It is the end of genuine thinking and the beginning of the final loneliness.
Edward Gibbon
Arriving at Longbourn before breakfast was fast becoming a habit for the two young men. Netherfield held nothing for them. There was only a quiet emptiness despite the bustle of the servants. During breakfast, Mr Bennet announced Elizabeth and Darcy’s engagement. After breakfast, Bingley took Jane and her mother back to Netherfield. Elizabeth and Darcy stayed at Longbourn. Back in the parlour they sat down on the little love seat. Elizabeth looked as if she was about to tease him. Instead, she looked harder at him. “You look tired.”
“I am, my dear. Bingley and I were talking all night. Well, I was talking more than he was. Oh, dearest Elizabeth. I do not deserve you. This last year and a half I haven’t confided in anyone except for the letter I wrote you. I was such a fool to think I could handle things on my own.”
Elizabeth gently placed her finger on his lips to stop him talking. “You are not alone. You will never be alone again. My love, please do not torture yourself. You did not make the choices to do with Georgiana alone. Everybody makes mistakes, you could not have foreseen what would happen.”
“No, but I could have enlightened Georgiana about the cad’s character! I could have cut Wickham off completely long before I did. I could have told my father what Wickham was doing rather than covering for him. There are so many ways I could have dealt with Wickham. I could have exposed him long before he even had a chance to get near Georgiana!”
“What good would any of that do? What you did, you did because you have a kind heart. Please, do not blame yourself for trying to help him, and protect those around you. How could you know what would happen? The future is not ours to see, besides you are not responsible for the decisions that others make.”
“Dearest Elizabeth. There is no excuse for my behaviour here in Hertfordshire last year.”
Elizabeth grinned at Darcy “No, my love there is not! But… there is a way for you do penance.” Darcy was not sure that he liked the direction in which this conversation was heading.
“What would that be my love?”
“Why you must dance every dance at the next Meryton assembly, of course.” Elizabeth’s laughter rang through the room lightening the mood.
“Only, if I may dance at least three of those dances with you!”
“Only three? Why you should be dancing them all with me.” Elizabeth teased him, pretending to be offended that he had only asked for three dances. In truth dancing them all together would have been agreeable to both parties. Etiquette denied them more than three dances, so they had to be content with three.
“Ah, I would willingly dance them all with you” Darcy then pulled Elizabeth into a fierce hug. This hug held all the pent-up emotions of the year. Darcy struggled again to contain the emotions threatening to overwhelm him again.
Elizabeth, would have none of his constant blaming himself. Soon her natural playfulness was exerting itself. Darcy was not disappointed as she moved on to tax him about how he had fallen in love with her. This was something he could not point to time or place. And so she teased him on and on until she suddenly fell serious. “Will you have the courage to announce to Lady Catherine what is to befall her?”
Darcy asked for pen and paper so that the job might be done and they seated themselves at the table. Elizabeth placed the writing things out. They sat together to announce the news to both Lady Catherine, and the Gardiners. Darcy was concerned as he wrote his missive. He had not spoken to Lady Catherine since their heated exchange. The news that he and Elizabeth were engaged would only inflame the situation. He needed to write before the news hit the Newspapers. Lady Catherine must not find out from someone other than himself. He hated that things had deteriorated to this point. No matter how he played the scenario out in his head he could not conceive of it ending any other way. Lady Catherine had held onto the fictitious engagement so doggedly and for so long. Whenever Darcy had exercised his choice there would have been trouble. He could only expect that things getting even worse when Lady Catherine replied. All he could hope for would be that she would quietly seek a match for Anne, and not try to cause trouble for his bride.
Netherfield 16th October 1812
My Dear Aunt, Lady Catherine,
I am sorry I did not thank you for your visit to London recently. Please allow me to do so now. It has been a source of regret to me that we parted on such acrimonious terms. Although I cannot repine the content of what I said, I do repine the manner in which I delivered it. My behaviour was unconscionable. Now, about the content of our recent tête-à-tête. I am much indebted to you for the information that you brought about Miss Elizabeth. The information you brought that day, removed my doubts and fears. Madam, I now announce the splendid news that I proposed to Miss Elizabeth Bennet for the second time. I am happy to report that she has accepted me.
It is a mutual hope and desire that Elizabeth and I have that we will marry before the year is out. You and my cousin Anne will be very welcome to attend the wedding, I will send the date when it is set.
I do not ask for your congratulations, for I know that you would not give them.
Thank you again for the part which you have played in this happy outcome. Please thank Mr and Mrs Collins for spreading that rumour, which brought you to see us both. It gave me the hope and courage I needed at that time to re-apply for Miss Elizabeth’s hand.
Your ecstatic and jubilant, nephew,
Fitzwilliam Darcy.
He was re-checking his letter when Elizabeth looked up. “Do you mind if I invite Aunt and Uncle Gardiner to Pemberley for Christmas?”
“Not at all, let’s make this a family Christmas. I have already asked Bingley and Jane, let’s invite your whole family.”
“Does that include my notorious sister?” Elizabeth looked at him archly, and he knew she was teasing him.
“I will not have her husband there!” Darcy growled.
“I doubt we’ll see either of them, for she is now an officer’s wife, I dare say they will be engaged elsewhere at Christmas.” Darcy smiled, Elizabeth did not seem to understand the reality that came with being an officer�
�s wife. Colonel Fitzwilliam had once told Darcy what it was like to be a camp follower. None of the women that were camp followers were allowed to be idle. Rank and social status counted for nothing. If you were to eat, you had to be useful and to work. Darcy knew that for someone like Lydia the amount of work that she would be expected to would be an eye opener. He sincerely hoped that it would help her to grow up.
“No doubt,” and with that, they left the conversation. Darcy took another piece of paper, and started writing the second letter,
Netherfield 16th October 1812
My dearest Georgiana,
I am completely ecstatic! No, the word does not do justice to my feelings. I am jubilant, I am wonderful, I am in love, and I’m getting married! Yes, you read that correctly. Elizabeth has done me the honour of accepting my hand in marriage. Your serious and boring brother is over the moon! I cannot wait until my two favourite women are by my side at Pemberley! I love her so much, Georgiana, I cannot put it all into words.
I know you will be delighted with this news and with your new sister! Goodness, I guess that means you have five new sisters. Only one of which is coming to live with us! I am delighted that I can now send and say come to Netherfield. Come at the beginning of November so as you and your new sister can get acquainted again before we marry.
I am hoping that we will marry at the end of November; however, we have not yet set the date. That is likely to happen, later on, today. We have to speak to Mr Bingley and Elizabeth’s sister Jane, for we are planning to have a double wedding. Oh, forgive your silly brother; I hope I mentioned before that Bingley and Jane are engaged. Never mind, for you know now. I hope that my dear Elizabeth will forgive me when I say that her mother is unchanged from the autumn. She seemed a little softened in her approach to me this morning. I guess she is happy that Elizabeth will have the Pemberley fortune. The woman has no conversation, and I am thankful that it is Elizabeth that I am marrying and not her family as well. I dread the thought of the day which marks Mr Bennet’s passing, as the estate is entailed. Mrs Bennet will no doubt want to live with one of her daughters; maybe I can build her a dowager’s cottage somewhere. All I can do is hope that Mary will marry some silly gentleman who would not object to such a woman in his house. That day is a long way off. Maybe by then, I will be more patient than I am now. I will now sign off and ask Elizabeth to send a few words, before sealing the letter.
Yours etc.
Fitzwilliam
He then looked at his wife-to-be and asked her if she would like to send a few lines to his sister. “Indeed, she will soon be your sister.”
At this they both smiled, and she took the letter, read what he had written. She laughed “Why, Darcy, if I didn’t know better I’d think that you still despised my family.”
“Not at all, but it is the truth you have to admit that I am right about your mother.”
“ Of course, I realise what you’ve written is correct. It would hurt my mother terribly if she read it or were she to be informed of it!” and with that, Elizabeth picked up the pen.
My dear Georgiana,
I was sorry to have had our acquaintance interrupted. I would love to renew that acquaintance. I am now claiming all the liberties and congratulations of you of a sister. I will wait to see you when you come in November. I hope that you will join my sisters in being a bridesmaid. My eldest sister will, of course, be getting married at the same time. Please write back with your answer,
Yours etc.
Elizabeth Bennet
“Well, Fitzwilliam, I have written to your sister. Now if you please, we must seal these letters and get them to the post. Would you like to write anything to my aunt and uncle?”
“No, I think it best that they receive the news solely from your hand.” Elizabeth was about to seal her letter with her own family seal, but Darcy sealed her letter using the Darcy seal.
“We must order you a new seal, while we’re in London.”
“Thank you.” The letters now sealed, all went to the post and a week later Darcy received Georgiana’s response. She had, in fact, responded the same day, she received Darcy’s letter.
Darcy House, 19th October 1812
My dearest Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth,
I send you both all the jubilations and congratulations in the world! I am so excited! This is the best news in the world. If I am to be a bridesmaid can I have a new dress, Fitzwilliam? Will I have to take part in the social side of the wedding? Oh, never mind, my brother is getting married! It’s about time!
I am so excited for you both I hardly know where to begin. Deep breath, Fitzwilliam, have you told our cousin the colonel yet? Please, let me be the one to tell him. When does the announcement go in the papers?
I am so excited about having a sister. Does this not mean that I have five sisters? Please, could I know more about my other four sisters? I would like to meet Kitty who I have heard is close to my age. Is Mary as awful on the piano and singing as Fitzwilliam said? I do believe that his wanting to hear more of you, Elizabeth, may have led him to think a little worse of Mary. By all accounts, it seems she thinks more of her skills than they merit.
Elizabeth, I know that we will be good friends as well as sisters, and I am very happy. Will I come and live at Pemberley with you, or will you want me to stay in my little London establishment? I do not want to be in your way, but I am very excited that I will have a sister; nay I will have five sisters. Elizabeth, may I sometimes ask you for advice? Mrs Annesley is very nice, but to be honest, she is not someone I could ask for help. Elizabeth, I would love to be a bridesmaid for you.
Brother, I am glad that you did not marry my cousin, Anne. Indeed, I am also pleased you did not marry Miss Bingley, who has wanted you for as long as she has known you. I am also happy to hear that Mr Bingley and Miss Bennet will be married on the same day. For you are such close friends that it would seem almost wrong that one or other of you should be married first.
I know I’ve asked already, but please Fitzwilliam, can I have a new dress for the wedding? I should dearly love to have a new dress. Fitzwilliam, you sounded euphoric in your letter and you know that makes me very happy. I am hardly able to make any sense I am so glad you are getting married, Fitzwilliam.
Oh dear, Lady Catherine is exceedingly angry. I have already had one abusive letter from her, telling me how bad you have behaved Fitzwilliam. I presume that another will be forthcoming. Now that you have actually gone and done the very thing she wanted you both to promise not to. To tell the truth, I am not sure I dare open another letter from her. I am proud of you Fitzwilliam, for standing up to her. Nobody in the family stands up to Lady Catherine. Did you know that Anne has also started to stand up to her mother? Have you heard from her yet, Fitzwilliam? Oh, I know that your match is a match made in heaven, I am sure about it. Anne has also informed me that she is interested in another young gentleman. She has been for a while, but her mother had kept her away from looking at other gentlemen. Oh, this is such good news. After all that my aunt tried to do to keep you apart. I am looking forward to our little family gatherings in Pemberley. Elizabeth, I hope you will correct me when my manners go wrong. I am sure that Mama would be triumphant to think you were in love with your bride, Fitzwilliam.
Elizabeth, I hope we will be able to love each other as sister’s ought. I remember last year, Fitzwilliam said you stayed at Netherfield for five days. Because your sister had fallen ill there. Also that you walked all the way there. Is that true? Will you help me to walk better? I’m afraid I use the carriage too much. I am so excited because I am sure I will enjoy having a sister. Oh dear, I hope you don’t mind my calling you Elizabeth. I am so happy that Fitzwilliam will marry the woman that he loves. My cousin is all very well, but she is so boring, and sickly she would not have suited my dear brother at all. My aunt will not like this at all. It’s a good thing. My aunt thinks too much of herself and what she wants. Congratulations Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth!
I do have one las
t request of you both. I know that it is such a selfish thing to ask. I have heard that Lydia is married to the man who would have ruined my own family. Pray, may I avoid seeing him? And possibly her? I cannot abide the thought of meeting them, especially if she is as wild as I have heard.
Your loving, overexcited sister
Georgiana
All this and more congratulations and expectations did Georgiana send to her brother. It was not until another week had passed, that he finally received a letter from Lady Catherine. Lady Catherine's letter was not so gracious as Georgiana’s.
Fitzwilliam Darcy!
Having spoken to that headstrong woman, I waited on you in London hoping to find you more reasonable! I was very upset to find that you had, in fact, become as headstrong as the young lady in question. She is inferior to you in birth, in manners, and in every way. I have not one iota of sympathy for you when you find yourselves in a very unequal marriage. Elizabeth Bennet is an ungrateful young woman. The calls of duty, decorum or gratitude have no call on her. Her person is not handsome, and her behaviour is impertinent, and I disapprove of this match. She is unfashionable, and you are making a huge mistake, by marrying a woman who is inferior in every way. How could you so pollute the woods of Pemberley and be brother-in-law to your father’s steward’s son? Why her sister behaved as nothing better than a common street trollop! That young woman will bring you and your family name into the gutter; you mark my words, Darcy! Elizabeth Bennet is nothing better than a Lady-bird. She should have been your mistress. Give her carte-blanche, but you SHOULD NOT be marrying such a woman. I am ashamed of you! You, Darcy, are no nephew of mine if you can do such a thing. I send no congratulations, and I send no greeting to that woman. Neither of you deserves such attention.
1812 How It All Began- Part 2 Page 16