3
After falling back into bed, Honi slept soundly until his alarm went off with an almighty racket. He jerked up and barely caught himself before tumbling over the edge of his narrow mattress. His head spun, and as he rubbed his eyes, he felt an ache developing in his forehead. The tightness across his brows more than his sluggishness, told him that he hadn’t slept deeply.
When he felt like this, he knew from past experience that dreams had visited him, both pleasant and scary. This time, they hadn’t been bad enough to wake him during the night. Still, vague recollections left him a little on edge, a little anxious. While he waited for the shower to heat up, he made himself a cup of instant coffee.
The first sip of the bitter liquid reminded him why he didn’t like coffee, particularly instant. But black tea didn’t wake him up enough after a dream-filled night, so he drank the cup down as quickly as he could. He couldn't really justify spending lots of money on the good stuff they sold at the coffee shop on his way to the lecture hall. He made an effort to treat himself once or twice a week, but towards the end of the month, there was precious little money left if he wanted to eat. He smiled ruefully to himself.
His friends at home thought he was ridiculous with his obsession about what he put into his stomach. He’d rather eat less than eat low-quality food. Organic vegetables, grass-fed beef, that kind of stuff. He stretched, trying to work some of the kinks out of his back. When his stomach muscles protested, he grimaced a little. Maybe he’d overdone it at the gym yesterday.
He was proud of his lean and muscular physique and had no intention of giving in to the “freshman 15” like so many of the other students. There was really nothing like the burn of muscles well used and the ache the day after.
His mood lifted, although a few seconds later, he swiped his cup of crappy coffee off his desk by accident. There was still enough noxious liquid to splatter his college bag, sitting on the chair. Damn it, now he was going to be late for class. With a sinking feeling, he realized two things. The tutor was Diepger, and he was likely to see Adi again.
Honi's gaze swept through the lecture hall as he slowed down from a dead run. He was late, but only by a minute or so. Diepger was still busy unpacking his bag, so Honi slipped into the last row. When he sat down, he quickly glanced to his left. A boy he hadn't seen before moved over a tiny bit to give him more space. He smiled at Honi shyly and Honi's mouth lifted slightly in response.
As he settled in, he quickly scanned the room again to see if Adi was here. She sat further down the tiered seating rows, nearly in his direct eye-line. Honi took in her appearance, and his stomach started to feel heavy.
Clearly Adi was not okay. She wore another gray hoodie, wrapped tightly around her slim body. Her head was down and she looked like she was trying to hide away from the world. It was kind of understandable. After yesterday's confrontation with Diepger, she wouldn't be keen to draw attention to herself. Honi had the impression though, that there was more to her stooped posture.
The sound of Diepger’s monotonous monologue played havoc with Honi’s attention span. No matter how interesting the subject, that guy managed to sound like one of those hypnosis tapes that put you to sleep. Pretty soon, Honi’s eyes were drawn back to the girl in front of him, and while he continued listening to the lecture with one ear, he began to notice things about Adi. She took notes with her head down. Then she would look up, probably to hear better, before flinching and returning her eyes to the paper in front of her.
What was wrong with her? Honi was perplexed at her behavior. Adi lifted her head again, looked to the left and recoiled. What the hell was going on here? Honi closed his eyes and tried to calm his mind. A couple of slow inhales and exhales later, he felt receptive enough to use his gift. This time, he waited until Adi lifted her head again and followed her gaze. There, two students down, a small furry creature clung to a female student like a bushbaby. The creature locked eyes with Adi, who jumped slightly and turned away.
So was that the problem? Honi had been trained from childhood to ignore the spirit animals. Through meditation and different mind exercises, he could control when he saw the creatures. Slowly a suspicion began to grow. Could it be that Adi's ability had only manifested recently? Honi had never heard of such a thing. When a child was born with the rare ability, they communed openly with their spirit animal from a very early age, until they learned control.
In his tribe, the elders would teach those special children how to navigate their abilities. If they didn't, kids would find it very difficult to tell the difference between reality and their visions. It was dangerous to ignore them. Imagine a toddler not being afraid of cougars or bears and trying to run towards them to play with them. It had happened once, many years ago, before Honi was born, and the story was used to illustrate the dangers of neglecting one’s training.
He looked at Adi again. Her skittishness was hard to watch. Her face looked drawn and her hair limp. He glanced at his notes and tried to concentrate. She was none of his business. John had made it very clear that he didn't want Honi to get distracted by anything.
Even as he remembered the phone conversation, his eyes flicked in her her direction again and again. Adi's hand shook as she tried to write. While he still stared, she turned, and her gaze found his. A look of surprise made her eyes even larger and she jerked her head back. It only took a second but Honi had seen the pallor in her face and worst of all, the growing fear in her eyes. She looked like she was in shock.
As he kept observing her and saw how she struggled, anger rose in him. It was easy enough for John Parker to dish out sage advice, but he wasn't here to see what this did to her. She seemed to have aged ten years since yesterday. If lack of training was dangerous for toddlers, how could this affect an adult?
Honi tried to imagine being in her skin. If this happened to him without training, he would probably think he'd gone mad. That he had lost touch with reality. That he couldn't trust his eyes anymore to tell him what was real and what wasn't.
Honi sighed. He couldn't walk away from this. Adi was clearly not okay. Leaving her to deal with this alone was not an option. A wet tongue licking his hand was Ho’neo’s way of showing his approval. Honi rolled his eyes at the wolf’s antics. The creature didn’t talk but clearly expressed whatever he wanted Honi to do. He was the best shot she had. Now all he had to do was convince her of it.
Adi was trying her best to take notes. This was an important class, the last mandatory Method class of her Anthropology minor before the finals. Pity that the instructor was Diepger again.
Adi kept her head down and sat as far back as she could while still being able to hear him. She really tried to listen, but her hallucinations, as she had reluctantly started to call them, were getting worse. Everywhere she looked, she saw people and animals.
Yesterday, it had been weird but funny. Today it was far scarier. Many of the creatures had begun to notice her. As a kid, Adi had always been drawn to critters and had nursed any injured cat or dog she found. Even if her parents weren’t very supportive of it—after all, keeping pets in a small inner-city apartment wasn’t the best idea—she’d never even been scratched by one of her patients.
Today though, from the minute she’d left her dorm, she’d been attacked by a cacophony of screeches that no one else seemed to hear. A small panther, wrapped around the shoulders of Owen, her RSA, had even tried to swipe her with his saucer-sized paw. Owen had looked at her weirdly when she jumped back.
And ever since she had sat down in the lecture hall, the noise level of barks, growls and hisses had risen to the extent that she could barely make out what Diepger was saying. A particularly loud snarl made her look left, only to come face-to-face with a mouth full of giant teeth, belonging to a German shepherd, not five inches away from her nose.
Her eyes swept up to the face of the creature’s owner, who made no effort to control his dog. Of course the boy had no idea there was a dog—no leash, no blanket—and he wouldn�
��t have been allowed to bring in a dog anyway. Nor was any of them allowed to bring in a boa constrictor, a rat, a giant gecko, and good grief, was that a pony?
Adi shuddered. It was all in her mind—she was going crazy. All she could do was try to ignore them and focus on Diepger’s voice. Those animals weren’t there. Mind over matter. Adi rubbed her thumb on the wolf medallion and squeezed her eyes shut, hoping, praying that things would be back to normal after a few minutes. Of course they weren’t.
She needed to talk, to confide to somebody. Only there wasn’t anybody. If her family found out, she’d lose her funding. If she couldn’t pull herself together, she’d flunk her courses. Her hands came up to cover her face. Adi swallowed a sob and forcefully pulled herself together. Nobody was going to find out.
Hallucinations couldn’t hurt her, and all she had to do was hold out another couple of weeks until finals. Who cared if that stupid dog was still snarling at her? It. Wasn’t. There. Adi opened her eyes and defiantly stared back until the student next to her noticed. Then she had to quickly pull her attention back to the paper in front of her. Everybody already thought she was weird—no need to give them new ammunition!
After a long ninety minutes—seriously, Einstein was definitely right, how long could an hour and a half stretch?—Adi got up, rolling her neck to loosen up a bit while avoiding eye contact with anybody. She put her materials back into her leather school-bag and made her way out of the room before Diepger might call her back. She’d already humiliated herself enough with him, thank you very much. Eyes down, hoodie up, she moved purposefully towards the exit.
A deep voice made her stop in her tracks. “Adi, right? We met yesterday. Can we talk for a moment?”
Adi looked up, and her eyes widened as she took in the gorgeous boy who had tried to help her with Diepger the day before.
He stood with his side to the hallway window, and the light streaming in highlighted his bronze skin and warm brown eyes. His long black hair was tied back with a cream-colored band. A simple white T-shirt emphasized the breadth of his shoulders and chest. He was much taller than her, and for a moment, she imagined stepping closer to him and feeling his long, sleekly muscled arms hold her safe.
Her body swayed closer to him of its own volition, drawn by a scent of pine and ozone. She felt his hand steady her and abruptly pull her out of the trance she'd slipped into. Her face heating up, she could barely meet his eyes.
"You look like you didn't get enough sleep. Are you okay?” There was concern in his voice, and when she finally looked into his face fully, she saw no mockery. Her face broke into a smile, and it felt like she hadn’t smiled in a long time. It only lasted for a moment, until she remembered why she was so tired and scared, and her face fell.
"I'm fine," she mumbled and tried to step around him.
"Whoa, not so fast." He had dropped his hand but not moved out of the way. "Adi, I know what you're going through. I—“
"What do you mean, what I'm going through?” Adi interrupted him, slightly confused. “I’m just tired.”
Honi—she now remembered his name—didn't allow himself to be sidetracked. "You're not just tired though, are you? I know that you can see them too."
Adi felt a moment of dizziness as his words hit her. No way. He couldn't have said what she thought he’d said. She needed to get out of here. If anybody else overheard, she'd be in a ton of trouble.
"I have no idea what you're talking about. You're scaring me a little. I need to go!" With that, she tried to push past him again. He might as well have been a mountain with how little impact she made on his position.
"Adi, please, let me help you," he tried again.
Adi searched his face for any indication that he was joking or trying to make fun of her. She didn't find any. He seemed genuinely worried about her. Her face grew even hotter. She actually considered taking him up on his offer for a second. That second passed very quickly though, when she remembered why she couldn't trust anybody.
If her father’s family found out that she’d told perfect strangers about her hallucinations, she was screwed. She’d have her funding pulled in twenty-four hours and would find herself committed to the loony bin.
With a deep feeling of regret, she stood up straight, looked the most beautiful boy she'd ever met in the eyes, and said loudly, "I don't need your help. Please stop bothering me or I will complain to campus security."
And with his expressive face, which changed seamlessly from confused to upset to angry, firmly in her mind, she managed to push past him on her third attempt and walk away. She didn't need to turn around to know that he was glaring at her back.
Honi watched incredulously as Adi walked away. His scowl deepened. If he had thought this through, he could have avoided the humiliation. There were very few students left after the lecture, but some had overheard. And while they probably hadn't understood what they’d heard, a group of girls close by snickered and threw pitying glances at him.
Of course they thought that Adi had blown him off. Honi shook his head and turned away. If she didn't want his help, fine. Obviously she wasn't in as much distress as he had thought she was. As he stomped away from the lecture hall, he began to feel a little childish. Ho’neo followed him, his tail wagging like a flag. Honi could have sworn the wolf was sniggering. He threw him a betrayed look that was met with more animal amusement. Honi rolled his eyes and moved faster.
So what if she hadn’t jumped at his offer? Maybe he had misunderstood the situation and she wasn't freaked out about the spirit animals. Maybe it had nothing to do with that at all. And once his anger passed, he felt guilty again. He ate his lunch by himself as usual and came to a decision while trying to chew a chunk of meat into submission.
If she needed help and came to him, he wouldn't turn her down. Otherwise, he'd ignore her and continue doing what John and his family wanted him to do: concentrate on his studies and become the legal spokesman his tribe needed. That resolution lasted exactly until the afternoon.
Honi was walking back to the dorm when something odd tickled his subconscious. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but something was different. He stopped and looked around, really concentrating on his surroundings. This was odd. Maybe it was thinking about Adi and her possible predicament, or maybe it was the call with John that had him on edge, but for some reason he couldn't tune out the spirit animals.
Not seeing until he wanted to see had become second nature to him, but today it didn't work. They were everywhere. Some were lizard-like, wrapped around their persons’ necks or perching on their backs. Others were large predators, following their humans with heads down but eyes alert and tails twitching. Honi knew that animal species had nothing to do with character. It was the state of the animals and their behavior that showed him whether a person was fundamentally good or evil.
He’d met a girl once, volunteering in a homeless shelter, who’d carried a giant tarantula on top of her ear. He shuddered at the memory. Even with the knowledge he had gained about the spirit world, even though the huge spider was incredibly healthy and nonaggressive, even though the girl was a saint to all who needed her, he couldn’t get over his arachnophobia. He had told John about it, and after John had recovered from a laughing fit, he had assured Honi that personal preferences absolutely meant that he didn’t have to love somebody if their spirit animal grossed him out. And he had never been happier than on the days when he didn’t have to talk to the lovely volunteer with that disgusting creature leering at him from the side of her head every time his eyes strayed from her face.
A hiss right next to him ripped him out of his memories. A black jaguar spat at him and Honi jumped back. A skinny guy with a shock of red hair glared at him suspiciously, and Honi tried to smile in apology. His face fell when the cat tried to swipe at him with his paw. Honi tried to hide his shock—he had never encountered a creature that tried to attack him. Another person’s spirit animal had no power over him, and he couldn’t be hurt. The owner’s in
tention was another matter, but another quick glance showed no aggression, only a raised eyebrow at Honi’s erratic behavior.
Honi shook his head and continued walking at a greater speed. Every time he passed students, their animals hissed, growled or barked at him. No matter how hard he tried to tune them out, he couldn’t make them disappear. They were everywhere. The noise level began to hurt his ears. He walked faster, keeping his eyes on the ground in front of him, and tried to keep the rising panic under control. And then, suddenly—silence.
Honi looked up in alarm. Now what? Every animal, every creature, their owners unaware, was silently staring at one point in the distance. Even Ho’neo’s bright blue eyes were fixed, and a light growl worked its way out of his broad chest. Honi put his hand on his head, a gesture he had perfected to connect to his spirit animal while not drawing attention to a creature only he could see. The world seemed to hold its breath. Together they squinted at the person coming closer and closer until Honi recognized the familiar gray hoodie.
Adi had her head down and so far had not noticed anything. Her face looked sickly in the late-afternoon light, and there were even larger circles under her eyes than before. Honi’s breath stopped for an instant. There was something really, really wrong here, and Adi was in the middle of it. She had now reached the intersection of paths when she hesitated. Obviously she sensed that something strange was going on.
Honi watched with wide eyes as Adi lifted her head. Another second of silence, then the creatures’ noise level went through the roof. If Honi had thought that the previous cacophony was loud, now that the animals had a focus, the noise became deafening. Adi’s hands flew up as if to defend herself, then covered her ears. She screamed, “No, stop it," then turned around and ran back in the direction she’d come from. Immediately the animal noises died down again.
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