“Did you have a good time?” he asked quietly. She looked apprehensive, staring at her hands, and he didn’t want to frighten her off. This was the moment where she either decided to stay here with him or go home.
Adi raised her head, and he was again struck by the light in her amber eyes. “I did.” Her eyes flickered, but then her mouth firmed and she continued, “I don’t want it to end yet.”
He smiled. Slowly he moved towards her, and with a sigh, her mouth opened for him. He kissed her gently, then deepened the kiss with his tongue. She moaned softly, and his arousal returned with a vengeance. Taking advantage of his superior strength, he pulled her onto his lap so that she straddled him.
He held her tight while their tongues battled for dominance. Both of them were breathing faster and harder. Again he slipped his hand between their bodies and stroked her nipple, tweaking it now and then. She groaned and pushed her lower body harder against his.
Before he lost control, he gently moved her back to look at her. “Adi, I want you. Are you okay with that?” Her eyes were dark with desire when she nodded. Her hands slipped under his shirt and undid the buttons one by one. He saw the appreciation in her face when she slipped the fabric off his body.
With a firm touch, she traced his shoulders and chest before running her fingertips down his ridged abdomen. He was glad he hadn’t let his workout routine slip when he’d arrived at college. His dick strained so hard against the front of his pants, he breathed a sigh of relief when she opened his zipper.
He was surprised that she was so forward but didn’t mind a bit. Her small hand closed around his erection, and he threw his head back with a groan. If that’s what she wanted, he was so on board. She stroked him a few times, then began kissing him again. It was time to move this along a little.
Without shifting his mouth from hers, he pushed at her gently until she was on her back on his bed. He had changed his sheets this very morning, and his covers smelled clean and fresh. Adi gasped when he rolled onto her but then opened her legs and molded her body to his.
He leaned on his elbows next to her face and looked at her. Her eyes were half-closed with pleasure, her lips slick and swollen from kissing. She smiled impishly at him, then tried to chase his mouth with hers. With a sigh he relaxed back into kissing. She tangled her legs with his, and once again, he became aware of their height difference. Her legs were so much shorter than his. She felt fragile under him and his protectiveness rose to a new level.
With one hand he opened her jeans and slipped inside her panties. Gently he moved his fingers towards her wetness, watching her face closely to make sure she was still okay with it. Her eyes closed, and she released a long and deep moan. He smiled at how slick she was, proof that she was just as affected as he was.
When his fingers began circling, she gasped and their eyes met. Her pupils were huge, only a small ring of amber surrounding them. Her breathing sped up and tiny sighs escaped her. Her legs opened as wide as her pants permitted, and Honi began pulsing his fingers.
With a louder moan, her body stiffened, her head tipping back into his pillow. Her mouth fell slack, and her eyes scrunched up as she reached her climax. Honi felt her contractions all the way from his fingers to his dick. He kissed her deeply, pushing his tongue into her unresisting mouth, then pulled her pants all the way down her limp body. He was so turned on, he thought he’d explode.
When she had recovered a little, she stretched long and sensuously. Then she lifted her head and smiled. “You gonna fuck me now?” Honi laughed and pulled his dick out. Adi lifted her legs, exposing herself to him. He quickly slipped on a condom, then scooted closer on his knees and finally, finally entered her.
God, it felt so good! He bottomed out and just rested for a moment, enjoying the heat and pressure. Adi’s eyes were again half-closed, the way he was becoming familiar with, when she was overcome with lust and excitement. Then she tilted her pelvis a little and forced him deeper into her.
“You gonna move?” she whispered hoarsely.
Honi didn’t need an invitation. He pulled back and shoved back in, groaning at how good it felt. Adi threw her head back and bucked against him. Together they found the perfect rhythm, faster and faster, until Honi felt the telltale tingle in his belly and his balls.
He sat back on his knees and pulled the girl onto his lap. She looked so sexy, so wanton with her tiny breasts hanging out of her bra. He brushed his thumb over her clit and continued fucking her hard. When she came a second time, her contractions squeezed him so tight that he pulled her onto his cock one last time and finished inside of her with a loud groan.
He felt the pulsing and twitching throughout his whole body and nearly fell over when he was done. He pulled out gently and dropped the condom over the side of the bed. Then he plunked back down next to her, still trying to calm his breathing. Adi was equally out of breath, and for a moment, they smiled at each other in perfect understanding.
Then Adi sat up, looking for her clothes as Honi watched her. After a moment he put his hand on her arm and said quietly, “Stay. Please.” Adi turned her head towards him and the corner of her mouth twitched up.
With a long exhale, she lay back down and snuggled up to him. He supposed that meant she’d stay. He pulled her tight into his arms and slotted his leg in between hers. They fitted so well, as if they did this every night. His eyes dropped closed and he fell asleep as contented as he’d ever been.
Adi opened her eyes and felt a little disoriented. The ceiling was unfamiliar and so was the blanket. She turned her head and saw black hair peeping from underneath the cover next to her. Honi was still asleep. Adi tugged the fabric down to take a look at him. Maybe it was a tiny bit creepy, but she hadn’t had a lot of time to study him close up.
His eyelashes were long, feathered like ink strokes over his cheeks. He looked so peaceful, she barely dared move for fear of waking him. Bathroom called though, and regretfully, she eased out from under his muscular arm. She felt completely rested this morning, and with a jolt she realized that she had slept without dreams for the first time in weeks.
If I’d known sex was the answer, I could have done it weeks ago, she thought, then laughed at herself. One-night-stands weren’t really her thing, and she very much hoped this thing between Honi and herself would develop into more. Adi stood up and stretched. She felt great, and the soreness in certain places reminded her of the incredible experience she’d had last night. She definitely wouldn’t mind more from where that came from, pun intended.
Quickly throwing on her clothes, she opened the door to the hallway. Honi’s sleepy “Good morning” stopped her in her tracks. She turned around and smiled at him.
“Sneaking out?” he asked wistfully.
“Not really, just gotta use the bathroom.”
“If you want a shower, towels are in the shelf over there,” he said, pointing vaguely towards the other side of the room. “I’ll get some muffins for breakfast in the meantime?”
Adi smiled at how unsure he sounded. “Sure, I’d love to.”
Half an hour later, they were both digging into some freshly made blueberry muffins.
“I really enjoyed myself last night,” Honi eventually said in between taking bites of a second muffin. Adi smiled and nodded. Honi obviously needed more food because he was so much bigger than her, but it still astounded her how quickly he was wolfing down his breakfast.
“You know, I slept really well after we…” She blushed a little.
“Oh, now you’re getting shy?” Honi teased her.
“Shut up, I don’t usually do that, you know,” she blustered, throwing her tissue at him.
“I know you don’t.” He grinned at her while ducking his head out of the way. Then he turned serious. “So you had no dreams, no nightmares?”
Adi took another bite before answering, “No, I slept as sound as a baby.”
“I wonder why that is. Maybe the spirit animals leave you alone if you’re physically tired?�
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Adi frowned hard at his words. “Can we not start again with those stories? I’m sure I had hallucinations because I hadn’t slept properly for weeks.”
When Honi opened his mouth to interrupt, Adi held up her hand to stop him. “No, I know what you want to say. But seriously, are you honestly asking me to buy into this superstitious nonsense? One good night’s sleep and I’m feeling fine. Awesome, in fact. I’m sure there won’t be any more visions or hallucinations or whatever.”
Honi looked at her with his mouth open. Then he snapped it shut. “Are you finished?” he asked angrily. “After everything that’s happened, after your nightmares and everything you’ve seen, you still won’t believe?”
Adi was taken aback by his tone. She hated people raising their voices at her. And for the first time she wondered if something was wrong with his state of mind. It was one thing for her to have hallucinations. After all, she’d had them before and they had gone away after professional help. What about Honi? Was he suffering from the same delusions?
Adi kept her voice as level and calm as she could. “Well, thanks for the lovely breakfast. I gotta run, quite a few things to do.” She stood up and quickly gathered her belongings from around the room. Then she left, nearly banging the door behind her but catching it at the last moment.
As she made her way down the hall to the exit, she couldn’t shake a feeling of uneasiness. Something had changed last night. And even though she had ridiculed Honi’s beliefs, she wondered if maybe she had just walked away from the one person who would always be in her corner, whether she was crazy or sane.
7
Adi opened the door and had to push hard to make her way inside. She hadn’t had time to tidy up last night and then forgot all about the state of her room. There were clothes everywhere, littering her bed, the chair, the floor. She looked around and swore. As much as she disliked cleaning, she hated this mess even more. Grunting in protest, she paired her iPhone with a speaker and picked a playlist.
While she waited for the music to load, she picked up some shoes that hadn’t made the cut last night. The electric guitar began picking out notes and, she closed her eyes for a moment. Celia Cruz picked up the rhythm with her strange voice, eerily reminiscent of a brass instrument. This version of “Guantanamera” carried a melancholy, underlined by Wyclef Jean’s patois rap, that got her every time.
She swept aside another pile of discarded fabric and dropped heavily onto her bed. Listening to the music, her eyes began to burn, and she had to blink hard to hold back tears. She berated herself for allowing the music to magnify her emotions, but at the same time it felt cathartic.
She covered her face with both hands and silently screamed her frustration into the skin of her palms. She’d had such an awesome night last night. Dancing was one of her favorite things to do, and it was the first time in months that she’d allowed herself to go out and just forget the crap fest that was her life.
Honi had been so attentive. The way he’d looked at her like she was the center of his universe. And the sex had been phenomenal. Sighing, Adi unconsciously crossed her legs and rubbed her thighs together. It had been more than sex. He’d held her nearly reverently, and the way he’d looked into her eyes throughout it… it had been more than just sex. They had made love.
She hugged herself tightly and curled even more into herself. Love. Pathetic. She had no time for this. Exams coming up, the constant fights with Diepger, the lack of sleep and hallucinations that followed—it was all too much. Even though last night she had slept like a log. The ghost of a smile crept across her face as she thought of Honi, of his focus when he spoke to her. He took her seriously, even if he seemed a little deranged at times.
Another song queued up and just as the volume dipped, Adi heard the ping announcing a message. She picked up her phone and looked at the screen. A missed message left by an unknown number. Curious, she dialed her mailbox and listened.
A strident voice made her stomach drop. "Adalwolfa? Are you there? Is this a machine?"
How the hell had she gotten Adi’s number? Adi had been so careful to cut all contact with her father's family. A flash of pain through her jaw reminded her to stop clenching her teeth, and with a conscious effort she relaxed her facial muscles so she could hear what the old woman had to say.
"Adalwolfa, I wanted to let you know that I will come see you Thursday. Please make yourself available at three p.m. We need to talk."
Adi was left staring at her phone. She didn't know what she hated more, that that woman always called her by her full name or the way she thought the world revolved around her. In order to cancel, she would have to call her, and frankly, she couldn't be bothered.
She hadn’t seen her paternal grandmother for at least six months. Maybe when she met her in person, she could find out a few things. First of all, how she’d managed to get her phone number. There was literally no one left alive in this world who had it. Strike that, that wasn't quite true. Adi’d had to let college admin have her number when she’d registered for courses. Still, why should admin pass on her phone number to a third party? Surely they weren't allowed to do that.
Adi felt thoroughly rattled. Everything seemed to conspire against her today. Her room still looked like a giant had turned it upside down and shaken it. She needed to get out. Her tears were long dried up and her room could wait another few hours. A change of scenery would help her think things through rationally.
She didn't run into anybody on the way to the bus stop. No commuters because it was the weekend, no students because, well, before noon on a Saturday. She had no idea when the next bus was due, so she sat on the molded red plastic seats, avoiding cigarette burns and bird droppings.
The weather reflected her mood, gray wisps creeping across the muted blue sky. The air smelled of moisture and ozone, harbingers of downpours to come. Adi mentally changed her plan from walking in the town park to hitting the mall instead. Now that she thought of it, she craved being amongst people who didn’t know anything about her and her problems. Perfect anonymity, people who looked through her yet made her feel part of a big commercial machine.
Had she always craved being part of something bigger? When she was little, she remembered feeling loved and included by her family. Her mom, her dad and most importantly, Oma-Adi. Her mom’s mother had told her stories every night, and Adi still remembered her callused old-woman hands gently caressing her hair. She could see herself as a little girl, her hair covered in a towel after her bath, snuggled under the large cover and listening wide-eyed to her grandmother’s words. Oma-Adi told the tales in German, and the harsh sound of the language made them feel more immediate and a bit scary.
Adi was so caught up in her thoughts that she missed the first bus. By the time she heard the hiss of pneumatic doors closing, it was too late. She didn’t want to make a fool of herself, so she didn’t bother shouting or even worse, running after the bus. The driver probably wouldn’t stop anyway, and the passengers would shake their heads and snigger. So she stayed on her seat, pretending she didn’t want to be on the bus in the first place.
She sighed. Pride was one thing, waiting twenty minutes another. Adi got up and stretched. It hadn’t started raining yet, and there was no harm in walking to the next bus stop. It would shorten the wait and give her more time to think.
She didn’t bother thinking back to Frankfurt often. Those days were over, her parents and Oma-Adi were gone, and there was no use getting all depressed. She’d been through that when she had gotten the news that she was all alone in the world.
Except she wasn’t. It was only when she’d returned to the US that she’d learned there was another part of her family on her father’s side. Over the years, the more she found out about them, the more she understood why her father had cut off his little family from his own mother and her relations. And now she had caught up with Adi.
A gust of wind smacked rain drops into her face, and as she turned her head away, the large bulk
of the city bus drew up fast behind her. She burst into a sprint and made it to the bus stop just as the bus pulled up for her. She got in and returned the driver’s grin with one of her own. He wasn’t a grumpy old man like most of the bus drivers, but her smile quickly dropped when a tiny meerkat wrapped around his ankle under his seat peeked out at her.
Nononono. Adi’s internal monologue started up again with a vengeance. She staggered halfway down the bus and dropped heavily onto a seat. Why did she see another animal? She’d been so sure this morning that they were hallucinations. And when she’d been dancing last night and flirting with Honi, she hadn’t seen any animals either! This wasn’t fair! Adi hugged herself so tightly, her knuckles were turning white, wrapped around her arms.
“Are you okay, lady?” an elderly man asked her from across the corridor. Adi looked at him without really seeing him. He had a bobcat sitting on his hat, and where the man was concerned about Adi, the animal was growling at her. When she didn’t reply, the passenger scooted away from her to the seat near the window, eying her warily.
This was crazy. She was crazy. She didn’t feel crazy, but seeing these damn creatures… when she’d been sure they were hallucinations caused by overtiredness… it was just too much. She changed her mind, she had to get back home. Adi jumped up and pushed the button for the next stop. She’d traveled further than she’d thought. It would take her a long time to walk back, and right now, all she wanted was get back into her bed and never get out again.
When the bus came to a halt, she barely waited for the doors to open. With her eyes firmly lowered to the ground, she stumbled down the stairs. Finally she was outside the smelly vehicle, and the bus pulled away. She stayed still for a moment, her eyes closed, fearful of what she would see once she opened them again. Eventually she had no choice. She couldn’t stay here and wish the world away. That wasn’t how it worked. She braced herself before taking a deep breath and lifting her head.
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