Except it wasn’t a rock in her gut. It was a forearm draped over her belly.
Brianna turned her head on the pillow. His face turned away from her, Sebastian was sprawled on his stomach, his bare arm capturing her, heavy on her waist.
Not touch her indeed.
Pinkies in the air, she grabbed his forearm with both hands, fingertips sliding along the silky dark hair on his skin. Gently, she lifted his arm and then slipped sideways off the edge of the bed.
Holding the dead weight of his arm in one hand, she grabbed the pillow and wedged it into the spot where her belly had been.
He didn’t move. Didn’t rustle. Perfect.
Still in her robe from the previous night, she cracked the door and tiptoed out of the room, quickly making her way through the maze of hallways to get to her chambers. No matter that it was the first day after her wedding, she was already late and she needed to get out of the castle and down to the stables before dawn fully broke.
Three hours later, Brianna was pacing in the abandoned gristmill outside of Pepperton, her boots softly thudding on the rotting wood floor. She stopped in front of the enormous round millstones, flicking loose a piece of rock from the top cracked stone that had been bothering her. Mr. Flemming was already an hour past their appointed meeting time, and Brianna had gone from merely annoyed, to irate.
She needed to start back to Notlund within a half hour if she was to avoid questions about her whereabouts. She was never out on rides for more than four hours, so being gone for too long, especially on the first morning of her marriage, would be highly suspect.
She went back to pacing, scattering dust as she twisted her lambskin gloves in her hands.
It was another ten minutes before the wooden door, half askew on its hinges, creaked open. Mr. Flemming stepped into the damp darkness of the stone structure.
“I expected you sooner, Mr. Flemming.” Brianna stopped her pacing, smoothing her hair into her tight bun.
“You are in Yorkshire, Miss Silverton. It is a distance.” Mr. Flemming opened up the worn leather satchel he always carried strapped across his body. “And it has given me very little time to investigate in between these appointments with you.”
“Then I will pay you to ride faster. And hire another investigator. What have you learned of Lord Newdale?”
Mr. Flemming pulled a set of papers, folded in thirds, from his bag. “I have discovered nothing as of yet about the brothels he has frequented. But I have discovered this about his financial affairs.”
He handed the papers to Brianna. She unfolded them and quickly scanned the contents.
“These are output numbers—Lord Newdale has a copper mine that is failing?” Brianna flipped to the second page.
“He does. The mine has been supporting the rest of the estate for years. As you know, his lands, although vast, barely support themselves.”
Brianna nodded, refolding the papers. “How long does it have?”
“Two years, maybe more.”
“So if one was planning for the future…”
“One would be lining up an infusion of cash,” Mr. Flemming said. “Or another means of supporting the estate.”
“And he has not done so?”
“He has not diversified his funds into anything else that would help long term. Trading, manufacturing—I have found nothing, as of yet.”
“You will keep these safe?” She handed him the papers. “I do need to be absolutely assured on any information about Lord Newdale, Mr. Flemming.”
“I understand. I will get you the answers you need. And do remember, there is the possibility that new deposits in the mine will be discovered.”
Brianna nodded. “Why do you know nothing yet about the brothels? I have begun to wonder if he may have a stake in them of some sort, instead of just frequenting them for base needs.”
Mr. Flemming shrugged. “I would presume it is the base needs. But as I have said before, I would prefer to see true evidence, instead of conjecture, before I vilify the man.”
“I trust you are working on that matter?”
“I am.”
“Good. Lord Newdale is only at Notlund for another fortnight, possibly a few days past that. I hope to have answers before his departure so I know how to proceed with Lord Bepton and Lord Rallager. We will meet here the second Monday from today, the same time?”
“That will be fine, Miss Silverton.”
“Excellent. Please do be on time.” Brianna’s hands tightened on her gloves. “And your associate, Mr. Welbury, did he send word on the other matter?”
“He did not. But he did tell me to assure you he is making progress.”
“I do hope that is so.” She motioned to the door. “Do make haste, Mr. Flemming. There is much to do.”
With a short nod, Mr. Flemming disappeared out the rickety door.
Brianna stood in the dim room, staring at the dust floating in the rays of sunlight streaming in through slit openings scattered along stone walls.
She knew every day that passed, Lily was more and more enamored with Lord Newdale. So much so, that Brianna was afraid Lily had already made up her mind amongst her suitors.
That wouldn’t do. Not with the nagging questions still lending suspect to Newdale’s character. Brianna would need to start curbing Lily’s time with him before they went down a path it would be hard to dissuade Lily from.
With a sigh, Brianna pulled on her gloves and walked to the crooked door of the mill, muscling it open. Stepping into the sunlight, she looked around, her eyes adjusting. The chill of last night had already flipped into steamy, oppressive heat. And she still had a long, hot ride back to Notlund in front of her.
Unbuttoning and stripping off the black jacket of her habit, Brianna rounded the back corner of the mill. There would be no time for stopping at the stream, so if nothing else, she was going to be comfortable with air flowing through her tailored white linen shirt.
She had tied Moonlight loose enough to a branch so the horse could reach what little water still trickled by in the near-dry creek bed, and now the mare was nibbling on tall grass at the base of an oak tree. It wasn’t until she reached Moonlight, setting her jacket on the saddle, that she could see past her horse.
Brianna froze.
Right behind the mare, leaning back onto a tree with one foot propped against the trunk and arms crossed over his chest, Sebastian watched her, calm on his face.
“You followed me.”
Sebastian pushed off from the tree. “I was not about to lose my new wife on our first full day of marriage.”
He walked around Moonlight to stand in front of her. “Is this where you have been disappearing to? To meet with Mr. Flemming?”
“You listened in on my discussion?” Brianna could feel her face turning red, indignation exploding. She stomped past him, her shaking fingers trying to jerk loose Moonlight’s reins from the branch.
Sebastian grabbed her elbow, spinning her to him.
“Should I have charged in, instead, Brianna? My new wife sneaks off before dawn to meet a strange man in an abandoned mill, and you chastise me for listening in? I believe I have shown incredible restraint with the situation.”
Her eyes went to the sky. “Yes. Incredible restraint. I applaud you.”
His eyebrow cocked at her.
She heaved a sigh. “If you spied upon me, then you must full well have figured out Mr. Flemming is a bow street runner I hired to investigate Lord Newdale. This is only the second time I have met with him here in Yorkshire.”
His hand dropped from her elbow. “You thought to do this on the first day of our marriage?”
“My meeting with Mr. Flemming was planned well before our wedding was. I could not change the timing of it.”
“You also could have told me of it. I would have accompanied you here.”
Brianna blinked hard at his words. The thought had never even occurred to her to tell Sebastian about the meeting. “Yes, well, this is my business. I did
not think to drag you into it.”
He nodded slowly, and Brianna watched his ire evaporate from his face. “So you are investigating your sister’s suitors?”
“Of course I am—I am not about to let my sister marry a wastrel. I discovered most of what I needed to know of Lord Bepton and Lord Rallager while we were in London. Lord Newdale was a late addition to the mix, so I had little time to discover much about him while we were still in London.”
“And Mr. Flemming speaks to you about brothels? That is part of the investigation? You think discussion of brothels is appropriate for a gentle bred lady?”
“Of course it is not.” She met his eyes. “But we are both well-aware that I am a not-so-innocent spinster, so appropriateness passed me by long ago.”
“I would disagree with that. Do I need to remind you that you are no longer a spinster, Brianna?”
“No. No you do not. I am painfully aware of my new status.” She waved her hand, dismissing his concerns. “Be that as it may, Mr. Flemming has had little luck discovering what business Lord Newdale has in the brothels.”
“I would imagine his business in a brothel is the same as any other man’s.”
“Yes, but I need to be certain.” Brianna took a deep breath for patience. She didn’t care to have to defend her actions. She was doing what she knew was right. “You may think I am going to an extreme, investigating Lily’s suitors, but I am not. I have to be certain of them. And that also means I have to be fair. I cannot scratch Lord Newdale from the list on conjecture alone.”
“And you get to make that decision for your sister—who gets scratched?”
“Yes.” Brianna’s arms crossed over her ribs.
“What about your sister’s feelings?”
“Feelings should not be a part of her decision to marry.”
Sebastian’s head cocked. He was staring at her with extreme curiosity again. “I have been around your sister. I imagine she would have a different opinion on that.”
“Yes, well, that is why I am making the decision.”
“Does she know that?”
“I can see your judgement, Seb. Judgement you have no right to make. You know nothing of why I do what I do.”
“No.” His lips pursed, contemplating. “Though I do see that you love her dearly. But you give her no margin to control her own fate. To control what her own heart desires.”
“You do not understand.” Brianna’s eyes closed, her head shaking. “The heart lies, Seb. It is ignorant.” She could not help the lump that forced its way into her throat.
Turning from him, her arms dropped to her sides as she went once more to untangle Moonlight’s reins. “But this—the intentions of men—this I can control, or at least know about. If I know about intent, I can control how it is dealt with. I can control how I protect Lily.”
Sebastian followed her, moving in close, straddling her side, both touching and not touching her with every breath. “That is what you need most, control?”
She paused, her eyes far from him, solid on the reins over the tree branch. Her voice went soft. She wasn’t about to deny it. “Yes.”
“No room for spontaneity?” He leaned down, his mouth near her ear, his breath tickling the skin on her neck. “No room for a heart that speeds? No room for a tingle down your spine?”
He bent even closer, his lips brushing her earlobe. The heat that came with his body should have suffocated her, but it didn’t. It only enveloped her, sending her heart thudding out of control.
Damn that he could make her body react like that. He did it the previous night, and he was doing it again. She had to remember to listen to her mind and not her body.
Her chin dropped to her chest as she tried to even her breath. “No.”
“Again, I disagree.”
Her hands dropping from the branch, Brianna turned to him, looking up at his eyes. The comforting brown eyes that were constantly on her. She swallowed hard. “Why? How? In all of this, Seb—in marrying me. You have convinced yourself you think you see something in me. But why? Why me?”
Without breaking eye contact, Sebastian lifted his hand, his fingers slowly capturing a loose tendril of her hair and tucking it behind her ear. His hand dropped, curling around the back of her neck. “Because of the first time I saw you, Brianna. That first time, the whole world dropped away. Everyone. And you, you were the only person left.”
“You talk gibberish, Seb—you met me by the stream at Notlund.”
“No.” His fingers danced slow circles along the back of her neck. “I saw you in London, Bree. I watched you for two weeks.”
Her head jerked back from his touch, shock shaking her core. He had watched her? She had to forcibly keep her feet from turning and running, terrorized, from him.
Running at this point would do her no good.
She had already married the man.
She swallowed hard. “For weeks? You watched me? Why?”
His smile spread slowly. “That first time I saw you, I knew. Just like I do with the horses—the curse, you called it. It was at the Thorton ball. Rowe had pointed out you and Lily to me. You were talking to your sister with that indulgent-scolding look you get on your face whenever she is getting her way and you are begrudgingly letting her.”
His thumb came up to her bottom lip, tracing the edge of it. “And I do not exaggerate. The moment you turned in my direction—the ball, the music, the people—all of it dropped away and there you stood. My eyes did not leave you that night. And they have not since that moment.”
For a long second, Brianna stared into his eyes, allowing herself to believe him. Allowing herself to believe it truly was her he wanted. Allowing her body to want his—to want him to kiss her, to strip off her shirt.
But then her mind clicked in.
Words. They were just words. And she had fallen for sweet words before.
This was no different.
She took a step backward, almost falling over. Sebastian grabbed her upper arm, steadying her.
She gave him a weak smile and spun from him, successfully loosening Moonlight’s reins from the branch. “We should get back. Lily will be wondering as to my whereabouts.”
~~~
“Bree. Bree.”
Brianna squinted in the midday sun, her eyes slowly adjusting to the light after stepping out of the far right stable. Her eyes acclimated and she spotted Lily running down the hillside from the forest trail to the castle.
She panicked for a second and then realized Lily was yelling her name in excitement, not in distress.
Brianna looked over her shoulder at Sebastian. He was talking to one of the stable boys but glanced her way with a smile and motioned for her to go ahead.
She resisted a curious shake of her head. Much to her surprise, Sebastian let her ride mostly in silence during the long ride back to Notlund from the mill outside of Pepperton. If he was upset at her reaction to his words, he didn’t show it.
Instead, he proved himself to be an easy riding companion. They ran the horses hard in some stretches. Languidly moving along in others. If anything, he made the ride fun, and Brianna had even found herself laughing at times.
All of how he had conducted himself that morning, she appreciated, if nothing else. She knew full well a different man—most men—would have had a very different reaction to his new wife sneaking off in the dawn to meet a strange man.
Brianna turned back to Lily, now almost down the length of the hill and past Wynne’s painting studio. Brianna hurried to her.
“Bree. Bree. It has happened. I am so excited.” Her sister didn’t slow when she reached Brianna, instead, nearly knocking Brianna over as she grabbed her in a hug, swinging her around.
Brianna grabbed Lily’s shoulders, wrangling her backward so she could see her sister’s face. “What? What has happened?”
“Lord Newdale—he proposed.” The squeal in Lily’s voice echoed into the forest.
Brianna stilled. “He has proposed?”
“Did you answer him?” Brianna’s grip on her sister’s shoulders tightened.
“No. Not directly. I hugged him. I was so happy. But I told him I had to talk to you first.”
Brianna nodded. “Good. Thank you for respecting my wishes to not answer without talking to me first.”
“Of course.” Lily wiggled out Brianna’s grasp, giving her another throat-choking hug with happy hops. “When can I tell him?”
“Tell him what?”
Lily pulled away. “Tell him yes, silly. When?”
Brianna cleared her throat, stalling for a moment. “I think you need to wait a spell. Think about what you truly want. This is a lifetime you are committing to, Lily.”
“But I do not need to think on it.” Lily’s hands fell away from Brianna, clasping in front of her. “I want Lord Newdale. He is the one. I am positive.”
“But what about Lord Bepton and Lord Rallager?”
“Lord Bepton is doable, but a bit stuffy. And I do not feel for Lord Rallager nearly as much as I do Lord Newdale.” She squashed Brianna in another hug. “This is all so wonderful, Bree.”
“No.”
Lily drew back sharply. “No? What?”
“No. You need to wait to answer him, Lily. At least until the end of summer.”
“But I just told you. I want to say yes. I will write letters to Lord Bepton and Lord Rallager to cancel their trips.” Lily’s hands went frantic in front of her. “Or we could get married right away and leave Notlund, and you can still entertain both of them here—it will not be overly awkward if I am gone.”
“No, Lily. I cannot allow it.”
“No?” Lily shook her head slowly, angst taking over the confusion. “No? What? You cannot mean that, Bree. I need to tell him yes. Immediately. There is no need to wait.”
“No, Lily. I am demanding it. You will wait until the end of summer.”
Lily’s hand clasped to her mouth, her face horrified. “No, Bree. How can you do this to me?”
Lord of Fates: A Complete Historical Regency Romance Series (3-Book Box Set) Page 36