Shattered

by Tl Reeve

  Aurora dumped the heavy towel into the sink and sighed. She needed to get the water cleaned up, find a plumber she couldn’t afford, and check in on Mr. William’s downstairs to make sure she hadn’t caused any damage. “Thank you again, Mac. If you’ll leave it, I’ll make sure to bring it back tonight when I drop off Abby.”

  Mackenzie snorted; his features twisted in a dark rage, and his eyes became icy-blue. “You’re unbelievable.”

  Aurora took a step back, pressing her hand to her chest. “Me? I’m unbelievable.” He had nerve. He was the one giving mixed signals. Not her. “What the hell did I do now?”

  “Nothing,” he growled before stomping off, she assumed to get the shop vac.

  Less than five minutes later, he was back with a large, beat-up red and black thing on wheels.

  “I can do it, Mac,” she said, no longer bothering to hide how tired she was.

  “Would it kill you, to take the help I’m willing to give?” he asked before he set the cumbersome piece of equipment down and plugged it in.

  “Can we not do this right now?” Angry tears built behind her eyes, and a flush of heat from embarrassment seared her cheeks. “I’ve had a long night, Abby’s getting off the bus”—She leaned over to glance at the clock on the stove— “In five hours. I’ve got to get this cleaned up, and then I’ve got to get a guy I can’t even afford out here, to fix whatever the hell is wrong with the sink. I also have to check with Mr. Williams to see if he has damage in his apartment.”

  “That’s what insurance is for,” he stated.

  Aurora snorted. “If you can afford renter’s insurance, I’m sure it is.”

  Mackenzie’s eyes widened. “You don’t have insurance?”

  “Can’t afford it, Mac. Food and Abby’s medication takes precedence,” she admitted, keenly aware of how poor they really were.

  The tears she’d been struggling to keep at bay, finally gave over and rolled down her flushed cheeks. Aurora bit back the sob, not wanting to fully break down in front of Mackenzie. She turned, hoping to make a quick exit to the bathroom to get herself composed. Instead, she found herself pressed up against the wall, Mackenzie’s big, warm body surrounding her.

  “Shh, star,” he murmured. “Don’t cry, I can’t deal with your tears, they’re breaking my heart.”

  The slight control she had of her emotions, dissipated with his sweet, kind words. Aurora laid her head on his chest, giving over to the emotions within. How long she cried for, she had no clue. All she knew is he never released his hold on her, even once she stopped. Now her eyes were sticky with tears, and her nose felt swollen. Not only would she be tired for her shift tonight, but she’d also have a headache with her little emotional fit.

  Life hadn’t been easy for her, or Abby, for that matter. She didn’t complain or bemoan the chances she missed, or the life she could’ve led. Abby was worth every struggle, every sleepless night, and worry. It was something she would’ve done again without a second thought.

  “You okay?” he asked.

  She nodded, not wanting to move. Mackenzie was giving her something she hadn’t realized she missed or needed until this moment. More specifically, male adult contact. Not as if she had a ton of experience with the male species. Sure, she had dated before Abby was born, but never after, and it’d been a long, lonely existence.

  Aurora reached up to swipe the wayward tears off her cheek, knowing she had more important things to do than rest in a strong man’s arms and wish for something that could never be. “I need to clean this mess up.”

  Mackenzie shifted and Aurora felt it. His erection pressed into her lower belly, and she tensed even though arousal crawled through her veins. Her nipples stiffened. Her clit throbbed, and she grew wetter by the second.

  “Fuck,” he growled, rubbing his erection harder against her stomach. “I can smell you, star. Smell that hot, sweet pussy. You’re gettin’ wet for me,” he mumbled into her hair.

  “Mac—”

  “I hate that I crave your taste and scent, star.” The dark timbre of his voice tingled down her spine.

  A spark of desire flared in his icy-blue eyes and his features were taut as if he held back on her. His cheeks flushed pink. She should’ve voiced a protest about him being in her personal space or at the very least made sure he was there with her after everything she’d learned. She meant to say such at the same time as his mouth crushed hers. She moaned, giving him access, and Mackenzie took advantage. He ran his tongue across her bottom lip before slipping inside. Fire bloomed to life in her lower belly as their tongues clashed, tangling together. Foreign sensations pinged through her, causing the perfect storm of emotions. She was hot and cold. She wanted to push him away, while also keeping him close. She’d never understood how people in books and on television could get up in someone’s face like this and feel all those things, even if it was acting. Now she did. If she’d been asked a week or a month ago if she enjoyed a kiss—a French kiss, she have said no. Now, she needed it like she needed air to breathe.

  Her belly wobbled and her panties were wet with her need as he roughly pushed his thigh between her shaking legs. Aurora rolled her hips, gliding the sensitive flesh between her thighs over his jean-clad leg, seeking relief. She let out a startled cry, and Mackenzie grabbed her hips. He guided her as she continued to move, chasing the most delicious feeling building within her.

  He broke the kiss and buried his face in her neck, quickening her pace. The rough sounds he made turned her on, but it was the sound of his voice that got her. “Get off on me, Aurora. Spill it all on me. Fuck, I want inside you so bad right now.” He took her hand and lowered it to his groin. “Touch me. Take me with you.” He opened his pants with one hand and pressed her palm to his straining dick.

  Later, she’d think about what they were doing; in the moment, she didn’t. She stroked him, trying to keep pace with him while he nibbled and sucked on the sensitive flesh of her neck. Her head bounced against the wall as everything inside coiled into a giant ball of pleasure. “Mackenzie.”

  He growled against her neck and made a harsh sound. The warm, wet heat of his release sent her tumbling over the edge. Her back bowed, and her breath hitched in her chest. A soft whimper escaped her while she shook in his arms.

  As quickly as it started, Mackenzie pulled back, panting as he ran his one hand through his hair and growled. “What the fuck?”

  “I’m sorry,” Aurora squeaked unsure what she was apologizing for. She certainly hadn’t pushed him against a wall and kissed the shit out of him. You did jerk him off, though. She glanced down at her hand, surprised by the sticky white liquid coating her palm.

  “Stop apologizing,” he snapped, stuffing himself back into his jeans.

  Aurora wondered, not for the first time, if Mackenzie was mentally stable. One minute, he was sweet and caring, the other, angry and grumpy. It was giving her whiplash. He took long deep breaths in through his nose as if he was attempting to control himself. A good two minutes later, he seemed to finally get himself together.

  “Go get a bath,” he ordered, and before she could refute him, he continued. “I’ll clean this mess up while you soak. I’ll also fix the sink and check on the tenant below you for water damage.”

  “And then?”

  “Then you crawl that sweet little ass of yours into bed and get some sleep before Abby comes home,” he said, his brisk tone bordering on harsh.

  Aurora narrowed her eyes, contemplating her next move. Deep down, she knew if she tried to argue with him, it’d get her nowhere. It’d just expel energy she didn’t have to give. Without another word, she turned and all but ran to the bathroom to start a hot tub. Later she’d think of a way to repay the ill-natured man bitching in her kitchen as he fought with the vacuum. Later, she’d think about what happened to them, in her kitchen, and why she wanted more.

  Chapter Six

  Rinse, lather, repeat.

  Mackenzie stripped his bed once more and carried the sheets d
own to the washer. The dream had been more vivid and alive. This time, he knew what Aurora tasted like the minute his tongue touched hers. He also craved black licorice, which didn’t make a lick of sense because before then he hated it with a passion. But ever since the other day when he fixed her broken water pipe, he had to have them. The small box filled with the bite-sized candies rested in his jeans pocket. It rankled his nerves and pissed him off. Plus, when he’d returned home from helping Aurora, he’d smelled like cum and sex, and he couldn’t remember what he’d done, other than he smelled honeysuckle and jasmine—Aurora’s scent. It could easily be explained, though. Right? He’d been in her apartment. All the rest?

  Total blank.

  What the hell is wrong with me?

  After Marjorie and Holly, he resigned himself to the idea he didn’t have a mate and also didn’t deserve one. His dick had been onboard with the idea of being alone for more than twenty years and now all of a sudden, his dick ached and his balls tightened. Made him lose his senses and ejaculate without provocation when the aroma of honeysuckle and jasmine hit his nose.

  Aurora had someone, though. He’d seen the mark. Someone who doesn’t give a shit about her fucked-up apartment or the sick kid who lived there. Didn’t the wolf care that his mate lived in squalor? Didn’t it bother her mate, having Mackenzie traipsing through his apartment cleaning up the water from the broken pipe? It didn’t make sense to him, but then, nothing made sense after everything he’d been through in the last year.

  He glanced at the calendar on his way out of the laundry room and frowned. Tomorrow was the first day of his testimony. Tonight, he was supposed to accompany his family to dinner at Kalkin’s and the Thanksgiving play at Mikey and Abby’s school. The boy had been practicing for days. He might only have one line, but by God, Mikey would nail it with practiced precision.

  He crossed to the coffee pot and grabbed himself a cup, then wandered into the living room. With the trial looming, things about his past were going to come out. Stuff he didn’t care if others knew about, however, there were a few things about his relationship, or lack thereof, with Holly that could damage his children and his niece.

  Mackenzie’s phone rang, tugging him from his thoughts. The name on the phone had him shaking his head. It was like Danielle and he were connected in some strange way. She always knew when he needed someone to talk to, to figure shit out. He slid his finger across the screen and answered, “Hey, were you thinking about me again?”

  Danielle laughed. “Always. You’re my second favorite Raferty.”

  Warmth bloomed in Mackenzie’s chest. After everything she’d been through with Caden, Hazel, and Simon, he’d been there for her. He understood what it was like to be cast out and ashamed. Sometimes, and he wouldn’t say it out loud, but sometimes, he wished he could have been the one for her, as fucked up as it sounded. Because he got her. He knew the pain of losing everything. The rejection and the burn of realizing what it meant to have someone they thought was their mate, turn their back on them and abuse them.

  Because, Marjorie had done it to him.

  “What can I do for you this fine, autumn morning?” Mackenzie glanced out the window and watched as orange and brown leaves fell from the tree in his front yard.

  “I’m glad you asked. Aurora and Charisma are working on decorations for the play tomorrow night at the elementary school, and I—”

  “Need me to go help them?”

  Danielle laughed. “No, actually, I need you at the orphanage. I’m shorthanded.”

  “Uh...” He frowned. “After all of our conversations, you still want me at the orphanage?”

  “Why wouldn’t I?”

  “Well, you know,” he said, scrubbing the back of his neck.

  She gave a soft chuckle. “Oh, Mac. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. I would have known if there was.”

  “I appreciate your optimism, but I’m still losing time,” he muttered.

  Danielle sighed. “Come in, and I’ll do a checkup. Then you can help me out.”

  “Fine. Give me ten,” he said, then hung up.

  On the drive to the orphanage, he thought about everything. Danielle had this self-assurance about herself, she could soothe anyone’s tattered psyche, but it didn’t negate the fact there was something radically wrong with him. Yet, when he asked his brother—his Alpha to do what should be done—put down a feral wolf, Kalkin refused. It was as though no one believed him. Like he was talking to a stack of brick walls.

  He pulled up to the orphanage and parked by the clinic entrance. Hayden was there. Her Enforcer was parked by the curb, allowing those who needed it, to park closer to the door. Mackenzie got out and headed for the clinic entrance. He figured he’d get the invasive shit done first, then figure out why Danielle really wanted him there. He pushed through the door and came to a halt. Standing there with Nico, Hayden, and Danielle, was a small girl around the same age as Mikey and Abby. She had brilliant amber eyes and hair the color of desert sand shot with natural golden-blonde highlights. Her high cheek bones denoted her feline genetics along with the scent of mountain lion that rolled off of her. She hid behind Hayden, gripping his niece’s pant leg for all it was worth.

  “Well...” Mackenzie murmured. “Who do we have here?”

  Nico placed his hand on the little girl’s back. “This is Emmeline Rose Raferty-Lopez. She is our daughter and the newest member of the Raferty-Dryer pack/pride.”

  Hayden took the little girl’s hand in hers. “It’s okay Emmeline, this is your uncle. His name is Mackenzie Raferty.”

  The little girl peered around Hayden’s leg. Her wide eyes and bow-shaped lips reminded him of a cherub. She blinked, fanning her long lashes across her cheeks. She didn’t say anything, but it wasn’t out of the ordinary for the Raferty family. They seemed to gravitate to the children who needed the most support and love.

  “Well, hello, Emmeline.” He grinned, crouching down to her level. “It’s very nice to meet you.” He wouldn’t push her. She’d come to him on her own time.

  Emmeline hid behind Hayden once more.

  “Is this why you needed me here?” He popped a brow at Danielle.

  She shook her head. “You just happened to catch us as Emmeline was released from Jasmine’s care.”

  “So, this is going home day?” He glanced at Hayden and Nico. The pride he saw on his niece’s face along with her mate’s warmed his soul. After everything they’d been through, they deserved their happiness, too.

  “Yes,” Nico answered. “Asher is with Penny Ann while we finish up here. When we are done here, we’re going to join everyone at the cafe in town, if you’d like to join us.”

  “I think I’ll pass,” Mackenzie said. “Danielle needed my help here; plus, I have to get Abby at three.”

  “Dinner then,” Hayden said. “We’ll see you tonight?”

  Mackenzie nodded. “I will be there.”

  “Great, we’ll see you then.” Hayden picked up Emmeline who promptly put her head on Hayden’s shoulder as they walked out.

  “She is a good nut,” Danielle murmured as the door closed behind his niece and Nico.

  “She’s always been a good one,” he agreed. “Even after all the bullshit.”

  “Come on, we should talk.” Danielle escorted Mackenzie into her office.

  “What do you want to talk about?” He sat in the chair opposite her.

  “I’m going to ask some invasive questions. I want you to be honest with me, and then I am going to tell you what I think is going on with you. Okay?” She grabbed her tablet off of the side table and opened it.

  “Sure, but we both know what’s wrong with me,” he said. “The writing’s on the wall, Dani.”

  “We’ll see,” she said. “First question; when was the last time you had sex?”

  Mackenzie jerked. “Excuse me?”

  “Sex, Mac. When was the last time you had sex?” Danielle was all business. Her features were neutral while she waited for h
im to answer.

  “I haven’t,” he said.

  She wrote down his answer. “At all? Since when?”

  “A long time,” he said. “Longer than I want to think about.”

  “Did this start before or after you were shot?” She glanced up at him.

  “After,” he said. “I thought... I thought it was due to the damage done from the bullet. I haven’t...” He cleared his throat. “I couldn’t get it up.”

  “Hmm...” She frowned. “Now?”

  “Danielle...” he sighed. “I don’t feel comfortable talking about this.”

  “Because I’m family or because I’m a woman?” She quirked a brow.

  “Neither. It’s... I can’t explain it properly.”

  “Okay, let’s try this. Tell me about your wolf,” she said. “Since I showed you the clothes, how is it going?”

  He frowned. “I’ve resigned myself to the fact I’m feral.”

  She sighed. “You’re not feral. I’d know, and I’d tell you.”

  “I’m still losing time, Danielle,” he growled.

  “Yeah, let’s talk about that a little,” she said. “What happens right before you lose time?”

  Mackenzie scrubbed his stubbled chin. Damn it, he hadn’t even shaved. “I guess I get really tired. I feel like I haven’t slept in weeks. I usually pass out—naked and the next thing I know, I’m waking up to my alarm.”

  “Are you tired when you wake up? Do you know you’re falling asleep?”

  “No and no,” he said. “It’s not every night, either. But, it only happens at night.” He left out the parts about waking up covered in his cum or the fact sometimes he smelled like trash or worse, like night blooming jasmine and honeysuckle.

  “I think I know what it is,” she said. “I need you to hear me out before you say anything.”

  “Sure,” he said. “What could it hurt?”

  “That’s the spirit.” She sat forward, folding her hands on the desk. “I think you’re experiencing what we’d deem, if you were human, DID—Dissociative Identity Disorder. I think your wolf spent so many years protecting you because of your fragile condition, you’ve become two beings within the same body—your wolf and you the human. When your wolf wants out, he takes over, shifts and does whatever your wolf does.”