by R T Green
‘It is beautiful,’ I agreed. ‘I didn't know this place existed.’
She turned to me, sad eyes burning into my heart. ‘Will you hold me please?’
I put an arm around her shoulders, she leaned into me. Gently I touched the side of her face.
‘You’re freezing.’
‘It’s ok; I'm a big girl now.’
I felt her melt into me, realised how much she needed our closeness right then, held her tight and let my presence give her comfort in silence. For two minutes neither of us spoke. Then she looked up, her eyes misted over.
‘Do you remember the olive's story, Madeline? How it was ripped away from its natural home, its heart punched out and then forced to journey to a different land?’
‘Yes I do.’
‘That's how I feel.’
She sounded so desperately unhappy. I gently kissed her tears away, feeling her pain. ‘Do you want to tell me about it?’
She hesitated, looked away. ‘No… not now. You'll know soon enough anyway.’
‘I don't understand, Zana.’
And then she said the words I didn't want to hear, just a whisper that scorched into my heart.
‘I'm doing something bad, Madeline.’
I closed my eyes so she couldn't see my desolation. ‘How bad?’
‘Really bad. I'm doing it for you… because of you. Because of what you mean to me.’
‘Zana, I can't help if you won't talk to me.’
‘It's too late now. But you can help. Just be there for me.’
‘You know I will.’
She struggled to her feet, the cold of the night stiffening her legs and making her stagger a little as she moved a few steps away. Her breath misted around her as she spoke. ‘How many people do you think we can see?’ She held out a shaking hand at the view across London. ‘How many normal human beings; most of them asleep, some working late, others making passionate love or maybe feeling desperately lonely? How many, Madeline?’
I stood behind her, slipped my arms around her waist. ‘Thousands… a million maybe.’ I could feel her body trembling. Whether it was the cold or the emotion searing through her I couldn't tell.
‘Do you have family out there somewhere, Madeline?’
‘My mum cleared off to Ireland when I was little. Got no brothers or sisters. My dad's somewhere but I don't know exactly where.’
‘But not in London?’
‘No, last I heard he was sunning it in the Caribbean.’
She turned round to face me, a faint smile on her face. ‘I want to go home now.’
I smiled back. ‘It is past your bedtime.’
‘I can't drive, I've had a bit too much to drink while I've been sitting here.’
The nausea was back in my stomach, a picture of the bar top with the missing martini bottle flashing in front of my eyes. ‘I'll drive you. Where’s your car?’
‘Back on the road. I took a laboratory pool car. I'll send someone to pick it up tomorrow… sorry, later today.’
I took her hand, and together we walked across the long grass that was now crunching beneath our feet as the frost kicked in, and found the pathway down the hill. We came to the clearing with the closed-up café. As we walked past I felt her hesitate, cast a quick glance at the dark building. It was just a fraction of a second, but significant enough to arouse my curiosity.
I said nothing, didn't let it show that I'd noticed her waver.
We reached the road, she led me to a white Ford Mondeo parked a few metres from the BMW. She opened the rear door and pulled out a suitcase; I threw a quick glance onto the rear seat. Now she'd pulled out the case, the back of the car was empty.
‘Almost forgot my stuff,’ she smiled innocently.
I took the case from her and lifted it into the trunk of the BMW, my heart breaking. It was a very smart case; fine-quality blue leather with expensive-looking chrome fittings.
But it was all on its own.
Just one suitcase.
Chapter 16
The drive back was a silent one, mostly because five minutes in Zana fell asleep. I kept glancing across to her, wondering what pain she was enduring, what secrets she wouldn't or couldn't reveal to me. Part of me wanted her to open up, tell me the whole horrible truth. The other part embraced the silence, too afraid of the horror I might hear.
It wasn’t a nice place to be.
There was little traffic on the road, I didn't have to think too much about driving. Perhaps a good thing, there was enough other stuff pounding away in my head. Stuff I really wished wasn't there. She’d confessed she was doing something bad… really bad. And because of that the goalposts had been moved.
Now I had a decision to make. Up to then I'd toed the department line; got to know Red Mist as ordered, even managed to get her to trust me. Invaded her apartment, gone to her when she needed me, and…
And discovered she was doing something bad.
So my next move was clear-cut. Drop Zana off, then get straight on the phone to Coop, tell him what had gone down and that a hill in East Dunwich with the best-ever view of London had something to do with what was soon to happen.
Clear-cut? Like fuck it was.
I groaned desperately yet again, fighting with something I'd never battled before.
Myself.
Forty-five minutes after we'd left Dawson's Hill, I pulled into Zana's drive. I killed the engine, still she didn't wake. Silently I gazed at the girl who seemed to have captivated my soul and made me do crazy off-the-wall things.
She looked so peaceful, serene.
I knew she was anything but.
And as I gazed at her, unwilling to disturb her sleep and the moment I was relishing so much, the feeling of dread came back stronger than ever. I had just had another first-time-ever experience, and my gut knew the consequences of it all too well.
I listened to my heart.
The one I never knew I had.
I reached out, touched her shoulder gently. In a millisecond she was awake, startling me with the wide-eyed look of horror on her face.
It lasted a moment, and then she softened. ‘Sorry, Madeline. We back already? I didn't mean to fall asleep.’
I took her hand. ‘It's ok, I'm glad you did. You looked like you needed it.’
She wrapped both her hands round mine, lowered her head. ‘I can't face being alone tonight. Will you stay with me?’
I nodded. As we walked across the driveway with arms around each other I glanced across the gardens, knowing someone not so far away would be watching. And knowing that later that day I would get the call to attend HQ and have a barrage of difficult-to-answer questions fired at me.
I didn't care; later on was a lifetime away.
All that mattered was right then.
Chapter 17
My heart was doing its impression of an oversized jackhammer again as we walked through the door of the apartment I wasn't supposed to be familiar with. I tried to say nice things about the place, but Zana wasn't interested in small-talk.
‘You want a drink?’
‘Only if you do.’
‘Think I've had enough, I just need bed.’
Five minutes after we'd arrived I found myself under Zana's duvet, lying on my back waiting for her to finish up in the bathroom. My mind was running through a thousand scenarios, each one scarier than the last. But I knew now there was no choice, I had to find out what she was doing here; what it was that was making her suffer so much.
Not for the department, for myself.
But tonight wasn't the time for questions.
‘Thank you for staying.’
Her sudden words startled me, I hadn't realised she was back in the room. I watched as she walked slowly around the bed in the soft light of the table lamps.
She was naked.
She was perfect.
The heart that was already beating faster than it should hit a new high as she pulled back the duvet, smiled and leaned across on her hands and knees
to kiss me softly. ‘I'm so glad you're here.’ She stretched out next to me and pulled the duvet up to her chin, I felt her hand slip into mine. ‘Spoon me please?’
It wasn't a question I could say no to, she turned on her side taking my hand with her and cupping it around her breast. I caught my breath; she was so firm, her nipple thrusting into my palm as she pressed my hand tight to her.
I spooned into her, my head pounding. She murmured quietly, flexed her butt into my groin, making me tense with sheer pleasure.
She noticed, of course. ‘Why Miss deWinter, I do believe you are pleased to see me.’
I didn't answer, kissed her gently on her shoulder, felt the perfect silkiness of her skin against my lips.
She murmured again, guided my hand to her waist. I could feel the tightness of her abs as she breathed heavily, and her hand slipping around her back to caress my butt.
Her touch sparked something in me. As she gently moved her hand between my legs, I felt like I was about to burst, turned her onto her back and pressed my lips into hers. As our tongues intertwined I pulled her to face me, cupping my hand around her butt to get her as close into me as I could.
I was high, already. The kiss lasted an eternity; her trembling hand slipped between our bodies and a delicate finger found my clit. I cried out, the instant intensity of her touch piercing into me. Her lips were eating mine, and as her finger slipped in and out of my wetness I was lost in a mist of a passion I'd never experienced before.
Suddenly she pushed me onto my back, throwing herself across me. I cried out as warm full lips replaced the finger, her tongue sinking deeper and deeper into me until it could go no further. My hands reached out desperately for her, running frantically down her back, cupping her butt. Her whole body was trembling, her crotch inches from my face but not wanting to sink around me.
She raised her head, the lips and the tongue gone from me. I cried out, so high, ‘No... don’t stop.’ I could feel her smile, saw her butt flex sexily. I tensed involuntarily as something touched my clit... the tip of her tongue, the only thing touching me. Back and forth, teasing with tiny movements, forcing it to swell and harden, faster and faster, yet so delicate.
I had to taste her too. My hands grasped her waist, pulled her closer to my face. She parted her legs wider, took her tongue away from me again. Gasping for breath; she stiffened her body, arched up and wouldn't let my lips reach the place they desperately wanted to be.
I let her take control, the anticipation teasing me to breaking point.
Slowly she began to relax. Her clit was coming ever-so-slowly towards my face. I cried out again as her lips and tongue made contact once more. And then she was in my face, my tongue deep inside her wetness.
She tensed herself around me. Her clit was like a pebble, she began to arch up and down, tiny movements forcing her more and more into my face. Her lips worked me so beautifully, her whole body flexing and convulsing as sheer passion took over. I couldn't take much more, our bodies seemed to be welded together, my arms wrapped tightly around her waist like I never wanted to let go. Her head was shaking as she brought me to the brink of ecstasy, crying out as she gulped in tiny, rapid breaths.
I could feel her pulsing, tightening around my tongue deep inside her. Her long blonde hair caressed the top of my thighs, its silkiness teasing my skin as her head moved up and down. Every muscle was flexing, her clit swollen, as hard as rock.
She cried out, lifted her butt away from me. ‘Let it happen, Zana,’ I whispered, feeling her wetness on my face once more as she allowed me to sink into her. I closed my eyes, knowing the moment I could wait for no longer was about to come...
‘No!’
Shocked, I opened my eyes, felt teardrops on my stomach. She was crying, her body shaking, not with desire but with pain. For a moment I froze, and in that moment she rolled off me and ran to the far side of the room, crumpled onto the floor against the closed drapes.
‘Zana…?’ I sat up, trying to take in what I couldn't believe had just happened.
She wouldn't look at me, shaking hands covering her face as she sobbed. ‘Please go, Madeline.’
‘But I…’
‘Please just go!’ She was shouting, anger and fear making her voice hoarse. ‘It can't happen.’
I walked across the room to her, wary and unsure. ‘I don't want to leave you like this.’
She took her hands away from her face, looked straight into my eyes and spoke slowly. ‘Just go. I don't want you here.’
I raised my hands from my sides, thought about protesting, but I'd seen that look before and knew it was pointless. I dressed in silence, as quickly as I could. At the door I turned, spoke quietly.
‘You've got my number, Zana. When you're ready to tell me what the hell is going on, maybe you'll have the grace to give me a call.’
She didn't answer. Still sitting naked on the floor, she rocked slowly back and forth with her arms wrapped around her legs and her head sunk onto her knees.
I closed the door behind me.
Chapter 18
‘Good morning Madeline.’ The sweet but no-nonsense tones of Duncan Scott's PA filled my ear as I reluctantly answered the phone, knowing what was coming. ‘Mr. Scott has requested the pleasure of your company… immediately please.’
‘I bet he has.’
‘I'm sorry?’
‘I'll be there,’ I said sharply and killed the call.
I wasn't exactly in the best of moods. Being snatched away from the brink of perfect ecstasy was bad enough, but as I'd driven away from Zana's apartment with the early morning sky growing lighter in the east, that was the least of my concerns.
There had been no time to sleep, and that would have been impossible anyway. I'd been pacing the floor in my own apartment trying to make sense of my life for just over an hour when the phone had jangled my shattered nerves, because for a moment I thought it might be Zana.
I knew if it wasn't her there was only one other likely caller.
I changed quickly, didn't bother making myself too presentable. My mood was growing more foul by the minute, I didn't intend looking like the perfect field agent.
Duncan Scott was going to give me hell… but I was sure as hell going to give it back.
As I drove to Albert Embankment my mind worked through all the awkward questions I knew would be asked by the man with the spooky voice; made a mental note of the answers I would give, the excuses I would find that might just sound plausible.
The lies I would have to tell… and make believable.
I groaned inwardly. Duncan Scott was no fool.
There was only one way I was going to stand the vaguest chance of getting away with the deception. The DIAL boss wasn't going to be mincing his words.
So neither would I.
I strode into the office from hell with a deliberately grim expression. The little man behind the big desk looked up, his face no less grim. Ryland Cooper, sitting in his usual chair, threw me a quick smile but didn't exactly look full of the joys of spring either.
‘Well?’ The eerie voice uttered just the one word, and already I was mentally wincing, hoping it wouldn’t show.
‘Well what?’
Duncan Scott sighed; even that sounded full of menace. ‘Well, what the hell is going on, deWinter?’
‘Don't know what you mean.’
The sigh of thunder again. ‘Treat me like a fool at your peril. Where did you go to pick up Zana last night?’
I gave myself a mental slap, something like the real slap a coach gives a boxer just before he goes into the ring. I leaned over with my hands on the silver desk, and fixed a stare into the round eyes of the man sitting there. Time for round one.
‘And how would you know what I get up to after midnight, Scott?’
I spat the words out. For a moment the chief looked taken back, cast a quick glance to Ryland Cooper who didn't speak. He quickly recovered himself, leaned forward and looked at me over the top of the half-round gold spect
acles. ‘This is an unprecedented situation. I have to take all possible precautions.’
I held his stare, even though I desperately wanted to turn away before it broke me in two. ‘That's bollocks, Scott. Just who is the mark here… Zana or me?’
The little man ignored the question. ‘Just after midnight last night, you left your apartment without taking the phone the department issued you with. You then proceeded to intentionally lose your tail, and three hours later arrive at Zana's apartment with your mark for company.’ He stood up, all five foot four of him, leaning across the desk matching my stance. ‘Do you not think I deserve an update?’
I didn't flinch, starting to wind myself up. ‘I'll ask again, Scott… just who is the mark?’
He turned away, walked to the big glass windows. ‘Zana is the mark, as you are well aware.’
‘Am I?’ I followed the chief to the windows. ‘You issue me with a tagged phone, watch me twenty-four-seven, tail me wherever I go… you got a hidden camera in my toilet pan? Just who the fuck are you guys anyway?’
‘You're being ridiculous.’
‘Really?’ I was almost shouting, my face close to his. ‘So DIAL's modus operandi is to watch every agent in case they mess up? So who tails the tails to check them out? Oh I get it… everyone in the whole fucking country works for the mysterious DIAL, because everyone's watching everyone else. Is that what I'm missing here?’
‘deWinter!’ Finally Ryland Cooper spoke. ‘Sit down and put your ego away. Sit!’
I sat, a little gratefully because I was shaking so much with self-induced rage my legs weren't so keen on holding me up.
‘Look, Maddie. The plain truth is that you ain't a DIAL agent. We take extra precautions with anyone on temporary assignment, especially where… unusual women are involved.’
‘So you don't trust me then.’
Duncan Scott, back at his desk, spoke as he polished his glasses. ’Should we trust you, deWinter? You broke protocol last night, and still you haven't given me an explanation or furnished us with any hard facts.’