by R T Green
Shit. Standing over me, her commanding eyes boring into me, she was taking away my resolve. ‘Yes.’ My voice was suddenly contrite, small.
But then she seemed to relax, morphing in an instant into kind, vulnerable Tiri. ‘It is not so, Madeline. I have said, you are here for me. Now please, may I give you some pleasure?’
Oh fuck. Here we go. Time to show her I’m not a push-over. ‘Sorry, Tiri. I’m not in the mood.’
She stood motionless, looking down on me with eyes devoid of emotion, or any reaction. That good old thumping in the ears was back. Say something, Tiri?
‘I see.’
Maybe a few more words?
‘Very well. Then stand up,’ she commanded.
I did as she bid, my heart performing a drum solo inside me. Her lips parted into a faint smile, her breathing grew short and ragged. ‘You should know you do something to me, Madeline,’ she whispered, her quiet words like forks of lightning. She caressed my cheeks, ever so gently, and then lowered her hands slowly to the peaks of my breasts. Delicately the backs of her fingers found my nipples, making them pucker from her touch.
I wrapped my hands around hers, our eyes locked together, sent her an unspoken message as I took her hands away from my body. She nodded slowly, menacingly, getting the message.
And then she swung at me, a vicious slap sending me reeling, taking my breath away. I glared back to her, the suddenness of her action leaving me speechless.
Her eyes were alive, searing anger into me, ripping away my spirit. ‘I am not used to being disobeyed, Madeline,’ she growled. Another slap, knocking me to the floor.
I struggled to my feet, finally found words. ‘I am not one of your subjects, your highness... you won’t control me...’
My fists were clenching, I wanted so much to retaliate. It almost got the better of me, but I resisted. My fashion accessories wouldn’t allow it anyway. She pulled me roughly to my feet.
‘You will obey me...’
I shoved her hand away. ‘Oh, I see. So the only way you can get your playthings to cooperate is by force, is that it?’
She looked like she was about to slap me again, her face contorted with rage, her whole body shaking. I braced myself, knowing I could do nothing to resist. It didn’t come.
She cried out, turned away. I was about to scream abuse at the back of her head, but something stopped it coming. She picked up her gown, threw it over herself.
‘I wish to be alone,’ she mumbled, almost a whisper. Then she grabbed my arm, bundled me through the door and back into my quarters.
‘Tiri...’
The door hissed to a close, locked itself. She was gone.
I wrapped up into a ball on the bunk, covered myself completely with the duvet. My face was throbbing, my head matching the pulses of pain. My subconscious was shutting me down, taking me into a deep sleep so I didn’t have to face up to the harsh reality of my hopeless situation.
Tomorrow was another day. But right then, maybe sleep would help me pretend it wouldn’t be as bad as today.
Chapter 101
As consciousness invaded my senses, I was cruelly reminded someone else had invaded me. The pain from the bruise on my face made that impossible to ignore.
I turned onto my back, slowly, painfully. My head was throbbing, but my stomach was churning in a far worse way.
What the hell was going on here? She’d said it wasn’t about Zana. If that was to be believed.
So surely, there was little left for it to be about. Other than me.
I didn’t have a lot of time to contemplate my future. Five minutes later the door opened, and she was there, standing over me. I flinched, momentary fear as my eyes met hers. She looked awful.
‘Madeline, can you forgive me?’
Her voice was shaky, like she was ashamed to even talk to me. It wasn’t what I expected, and the power of speech left me for a moment. I didn’t know what to say, flicked my eyes around the room looking for some kind of inspiration. My inner voyeur was sitting on the floor in a corner, sobbing quietly to herself. She saw me looking, shook her head and buried her head in her arms.
Fat lot of use you are.
‘You hit me.’ My voice was a hoarse whisper, croaking out uncertain words I never thought I’d have to say.
She turned away, unable to look at me. ‘I am so sorry. Sometimes I... I lose control.’
Fully conscious then, I wasn’t in the mood to let up. ‘You hurt me, Tiri. And I still hurt, like hell.’
She put her hands over her face, and then turned to me again. ‘I know. Please, will you at least allow me to ease your pain?’
‘What are you going to do, Tiri? Fuck me better?’
I flinched, mentally this time, expected some kind of sharp reply, but instead her eyes filled with tears. ‘Our technology is more advanced than yours. I have brought a device to bring you some relief.’
‘I’ve been on the wrong end of your devices once too often.’
She nodded, like she understood the sarcasm. ‘Please, it is non-invasive.’
‘Makes a change.’
She pressed a button on what appeared to be a hand-held scanner. As she sat hesitantly beside me on the bed, the elegant self-confidence gone, she looked a shadow of the dominator she was a few hours ago.
‘Close your eyes, please.’
‘Is that a wise move for me?’
‘Please.’
‘Ok, sorry.’
I gingerly closed my eyes as requested, making sure she noticed my possibly-exaggerated wince of pain. Then I could feel a faint warmth, soothing, reassuring.
‘Why did you want to find Zana?’ I already knew the answer, but I wanted to see what she’d say.
She didn’t reply for a moment. ‘To talk with her, discover why she did what she did.’
You already know that, your highness. It was because of me, your captive.
‘I see.’ I mimicked her answer of a day ago. Or was it two? Hell only knows.
Again she didn’t rise to it. It seemed like she’d lost her spirit. ‘Just another minute.’ She was over-concentrating on the electronic pain-killer in her hand, reluctant to concentrate on me.
‘How did you know I was in Tobago?’ She was going to focus on me, so I could make her squirm a little longer.
‘Our technology is superior to that on Earth.’
Yeah, right. You can find me but you didn’t know where a fellow Calanduran was?
My bravado failed me on that one; I couldn’t say it out loud, even though I wanted to. My bitten lip reminded me just in time to bite it again, screaming in my ear that I was still a captive with no obvious means of escape.
Tiri stood up, tried to smile. ‘You will feel some relief now. I will come back later, repeat the treatment.’
‘You’re going? Is it morning?
She sat on the edge of the bed. ‘Yes, a little later even than usual for me to start my day. I wanted to talk with you when you woke.’
‘Thank you.’
Why am I thanking her? It was her who caused all this.
‘I do not deserve thanks.’ No, you don’t. Sorry I said it. She took both my hands in hers, I didn’t pull away. ‘Please, try and find forgiveness in your heart. I am truly sorry I hit you.’
She headed for the door.
‘Tiri?’ I decided to see if I could ram my tiny victory home, while my captor was in a meek and mild mood. ‘I will try and find forgiveness. But you will never hit me again.’
She nodded, and the door hissed shut behind her.
Alone, I tried to make sense of a very unsensible situation. The more I knew, the less I understood. Everything seemed a contradiction of itself.
Including me.
Tiri knew where to find me, even though I knew full well I’d gone totally off the grid. But Zana was wandering around in a Muslim disguise... just a few hours before they grabbed me.
Tiri said she knew where she was. Was she here, on the shuttle?
Oh shi
t. No... she wouldn’t. Tears began to well up in my eyes. Was our emotional reunion just part of a...
Stop it. You’re over-thinking again. Remember the unbreakable love... the overpowering emotion of Dawson’s Hill... she died in your arms, for Christ’s sake.
I shuddered, the recall of what I’d thought were our last moments together making the tears roll down my cheeks. And that rebooted the memory of the other person who died that night. In a nanosecond my emotional state got ten times worse. Realisation had just exploded into my head, and the effect was just as epic as the rocket we fired into the belly of the Calanduran mother-ship.
Maybe Tiri and me were more alike than I thought.
‘Sometimes I lose control,’ she’d said, only a few minutes ago.
I lost control too, that night on Dawson’s Hill. My emotions on heat, all I wanted to do was end the life of the man who’d just put a bullet into Zana’s chest. Nothing was going to stop my retribution.
And nothing did.
I regret killing him now. More than I allow myself to think about. That night I not only lost the woman I loved, but also my freedom. And now I am a fugitive, until the day I die... or the day they catch up with me.
Yes, I regret losing control now.
Tiri’s eyes were full of regret, her body language crippled with remorse. She lost control, inflicted her hurt on someone else, and now wishes she hadn’t. Just like me.
At least I didn’t die, unlike the poor unfortunate agent on the hill.
I had to forgive her.
This time.
And somehow I had to escape, before this confusing hell got any worse.
Chapter 102
The day wore on. I wasn’t getting anywhere with my escape plans. Unless I could shed my fashion accessories, it seemed an impossible task. I’d tried a few things to try and shift the bangles, getting a multitude of small electric shocks for my trouble. The damn things weren’t going anywhere.
It was starting to look like there was only one option. Ask Tiri to take them off. But there was only one way that was ever going to happen. And it filled me with horror.
I’d have to convince her I was a beaten woman. Her pet poodle.
Still no Lisa. Little miss paleface brought my food. I asked her again if her crewmate was ok, she smiled blandly and didn’t say a word, the infuriating mute.
Another hour passed, and then Tiri was there, walking into the room with a little more elegance and poise than earlier, but still a hint of uncertainty in her body language. She tried to smile, but was clearly still finding it hard. She had my dress, and a couple of other things.
‘We have cleaned it for you,’ she said quietly, as she handed it to me. ‘And here is your watch. Also, I have made you a hairbrush.’
‘Made?’ I smiled warmly, trying to show gratitude for her peace offerings.
‘We have the facility here to recreate certain small things. It occurred to me you might need one.’
She had a point. No such thing on Calandura, none of them have a single hair, anywhere. Wow, no armpit or pube shaving. Heaven.
She had the pain-relieving device in her hand. ‘How is the discomfort now?’
I wouldn’t have described my face-numbing agony with such an innocuous word. But I didn’t offer her an alternative description; the discomfort was a lot easier after all. ‘A little better, thank you.’
‘Good. Lay down please. One more dose should be sufficient.’
I dutifully stretched out on the bed. She sat by my side, and the orange light went to work, soothing me, warming me.
It was time for me to go to work too. On Tiri.
‘Why did you have to hurt me, Tiri? You have brought me pleasure unlike anything I’ve ever known, and I know you want to make me feel nice. But somehow it’s cold, unfeeling. Why can’t we just make love?’
She looked up, and our eyes locked together. ‘Make love? I have told you, Calandurans are incapable of such a human irreverence.’
‘I don’t believe you. I have seen things in your eyes, felt it in your touch. You try so hard to keep it impersonal... but you fail, Tiri.’
I saw a slight shake of her head, as her eyes fell back to the device. ‘What you see is not love, Madeline. Your beauty excites me, your spirit inflames me. The touch of our bodies ignites me, and I find a need to give you pleasure.’
‘And pain?’
She didn’t, couldn’t answer that. ‘For me it is purely physical, and... emotional.’
I think you’re as confused as me, Tiri.
I smiled sweetly. ‘I’m not asking you to love me. We could never love each other, not like... that. But there is such a thing as two people bringing each other joy without special effects and pain.’
She frowned slightly. ‘I will try.’
‘And I want to ask you another favour. Please can I have these shackles off? They are causing me distress, and upsetting me.’
Oh shit, I’m sounding like a Stepford wife now. The orange light died, she stood up slowly, staring into my eyes with a look on her face I couldn’t work out. Hell, I’ve gone too far with the nicey-nicey crap. Say something please, I’m squirming like a fish out of water here.
She smiled, warmly. I breathed again. ‘I admire your spirit, Madeline.’ She turned, walked to the door.
Well?
Now she was heading through it. Don’t you dare walk away and leave me hanging.
She didn’t.
‘And as I have said, that spirit inflames me. I will consider removing the restraints, depending on how things go. Now there are matters I must attend to, so I will leave you to your evening. We will breakfast together in the morning, if that is acceptable to you.’
I stood under the cleansing light of the shower, unable to stop my head from shaking. Shocked at my own ability to play the part of the little woman, I was even more stunned that it seemed to be working.
Would I really get the bangles off, if I allowed her to have her wishes?
There was nothing in our relationship so far to say otherwise. She’d always been true to her word. At both ends of the spectrum.
And even though it really shouldn’t, the thought of another session on the play couch excited me. More weird. Is this what my inner goddess truly wants? Someone was nodding furiously in the background. Guess it is.
I stood in front of the mirror, and the tears came again. No tears of heartbreak or ecstasy this time, just the eye-watering effect of a hairbrush ripping through long tangled hair that hadn’t seen its best friend for a few days.
But this time at least, the agony was worth it. I looked like me again. And ten minutes later, after I’d put the dress back on, I felt like me as well.
It was a good feeling. Wearing someone else’s clothes was always... wearing someone else’s clothes. Maybe it was just a simple summer dress... but it was mine.
I had my identity back. The next step might be a little harder.
Now I had to take my freedom back.
Chapter 103
I had my super-expensive watch back. As I woke and slipped it on my wrist, it told me it was seven in the morning. I considered putting on the gown, but dismissed that thought. I’d been invited to breakfast, so she was going to see the real me... all glammed up in my own dress, radiant and confident in my own skin, ready to pretend I was her willing captive.
Ok, maybe I exaggerate the radiant and confident bit.
And the glammed-up part.
Regardless, she was going to see the me I wanted her to.
Ten minutes later the door opened, and she stood in the doorway. Her eyes fell on me, and a smile spread across her face.
‘You look beautiful,’ she breathed.
‘That’s because I look like me.’
‘Yes, you do. Come.’
I followed her meekly to the palace. She looked me up and down, her eyes warm and appreciative. ‘Please, may I touch your hair?’
Wow. Result. Asking, not taking. ‘Of course.’
&
nbsp; She reached out a hand, slid long fingers deliciously through my freshly-brushed hair. I smiled back to her, deliberately catching my breath, exaggerating the effect her touch was having on me.
‘So soft...’ she whispered, pulling some of my hair forward, caressing it with both her hands, fascinated by its silkiness. ‘I wish I had hair, like yours.’
I wrapped my hands around hers, gently but firmly, deliberately easing them away from my hair. ‘I must remember to use it to tease you.’
She nodded, almost submissively. ‘Please, let me shower, then I will be yours.’
Yours. Oh, I can work with that. I watched as she disappeared into the bathroom, trying to ignore my inner voyeur who had suddenly found a new lease of life, and was warbling in my ear, ‘Go girl, go girl, go girl...’ over and over.
Yet again I ran the brush through my hair, and not just because I wanted it as perfect as possible for my subterfuge. The hairbrush felt like an old friend I’d just been reunited with after a few decades apart.
She dressed in a pale yellow gown, and as she walked by me, her hand drifted gently across my shoulders. My owner was still all sweetness and light. Should I be worried?
Thirty seconds later the ghostly Miss Paleface was placing breakfast on the table. Tiri said three words to her I couldn’t understand, she nodded and left the room.
Maybe she really was mute after all.
We sat down, Tiri pressed a button on a tiny device sitting on the table, and the big black screen on the wall faded into a view of the rainforest. ‘Some natural light today, I think. Please, eat.’
Wow, I am honoured. The outside world. I ate, like the obedient puppy, feeling a little uneasy. Something was different, something I couldn’t put my finger on. She was different; smiling, exuding kindness and tenderness, and yet I could see no warmth in her eyes. It was unnerving, unsettling me. And although I was in no real position to do it, I decided to broach what was probably a sore subject.