The twins were everything to me, for lack of a better word. They were my best friends and confidants. I could talk to them about anything and they never once judged me. They were the first to know about what I was considering doing with Todd. They were the first to know about me leaving New York for Adamsville. They were the first to know that I didn't plan to return, despite what my ticket said. I knew that I’d lose myself without them, but they were only ever a phone call away. Besides, they planned to visit me the first chance they had.
"So am I," I said with a smile. I resumed watching the trees go by as we began to venture up the mountain. After a while, I fell asleep because I felt like I was watching the same trees go by on repeat, despite how beautiful the landscape was.
When I opened my eyes again, the sun was setting, and we were no longer on the highway. Alan was steering the car into the driveway of a powder blue house with a dark blue trim. He, Addie, and I got out of the car, but I didn't bother grabbing anything more than my purse. As I followed them into the house, I sent a text to the twins in New York and told them that I'd landed safe but couldn't call just yet. I had a feeling that there was some sort of family dinner planned in honor of my arrival.
The moment I entered the house, Addie's daughter, Abigail, almost knocked me down. I stumbled but managed to stay on my feet with some effort. When I looked at her for the very first time, I felt like I was looking into a fun house mirror. We were almost identical, minus the deliberate differences. Her nose turned down, whereas mine was more of a button. Her hair was brown, somewhere between Alan's mousy and Addie's chocolate, and held back with a headband. Her eyes were Alan's green. She had a small gap between her two front teeth.
It was no surprise that Alan was clueless to the fact that I wasn't his daughter.
I knew, in that instant, that Alan had been as faithful to my mother as she had been to him. The only questions I had were: Was it continuous? How long had it been between my parents' separation and deciding they were getting married again?
Alan laughed. "Abby, give Ceres a moment to breathe," he said.
Abigail stepped back, blushing. "Sorry, Dad," she said. "I was just so excited to finally meet my sister."
I didn't think I had ever heard a twenty-something year-old call their mother's new husband 'Dad'. Generally, they used the "new parent's" name. I knew that there was were times where the relationship between the child and stepparent was strong and it didn't matter. I had also never heard of a twenty-something call a stranger "my sister". My parents' divorce went from start to gruesome finish in under six months. Alan and Addie got married two weeks after it was over. There was no logical reason Abigail should call Alan 'Dad' even after nine years, except....
I looked at Alan. I could tell the he knew that I had concluded what I had by the way his face reacted to mine. "Ceres, would you come with me?" he asked. I think both Addie and Abigail realized that he wanted to have this conversation alone.
I followed Alan into his office and shut the door behind me. He sighed and faced me, but before he could speak, I did.
"How could you not tell me?" I demanded. "How could you let me believe my whole life that I was an only child? Did you even try to be with Mom?" I asked. "Were we the family you found yourself ashamed of? Is that why you never brought us home?"
Alan pinched the bridge of his nose as he exhaled. "Ceres, you don't understand," he began.
"You're damn right I don't understand!" I shouted.
There were a thousand emotions raging within me and most of them made me feel like a hypocrite. I felt betrayed because he had lied to us about having another family. It hurt me because he didn't trust me enough to tell me the truth. It blindsided me because it wasn't what I was expecting when I walked into the house. I was weary from traveling across the country. I was afraid that I was now expendable. If he found out that I wasn't his daughter, what reason would he have for keeping me around now that he has his own real child all the time? Now, more than ever, I needed to keep that secret so that I could keep a parent.
I felt like a horrible person.
Alan pinched the bridge of his nose. "Addie and I grew up together," he informed me in a soft, tired voice. "We had always known that we were going to get married someday and start a family. That all changed when I went to college and met your mom. Lynn was everything Addie wasn't. I had never met anyone like her before and I fell, head-over-heels, in love with your mom. When I proposed to her, I'd already told Addie that I wasn't going to marry her. I told her everything about Lynn and that I wanted a life with her instead. I'd thought that we'd have at least a few years before a baby came along. I didn't think we'd get you on the first shot.
"It was a month later that Addie got in touch with me and told me that she was also pregnant. It tore me up inside, Ceres. I wanted to stay with you and your mother because I loved you so much. I also wanted to come back here and live the life I should have had because I knew it would be something I could do without a lot of effort. I still loved Addie with all my heart, but I didn't know how to have two lives.
"For a few years, I knew nothing of Abby aside from what Addie would tell me through emails and quick phone calls. I was never complete because I couldn't merge my two lives and my two families.
"I never told you or your mother because I didn't know how to when the divorce happened. I wasn't prepared to confess that I'd been living two lives the entire time I'd been with your mother. I wanted to tell you a thousand times, but I never knew where to begin...."
"Did you think that I would come here and not notice it?" I asked. "I mean, for Christ's sake, Alan, we're almost identical!" I cried. "How could I not notice that?"
Alan nodded. "I know," he said. "I'd be lying if I said that I hadn't hoped you wouldn't figure it out, especially so soon, but I did. I've been praying for weeks that you'd come here, meet Abby, and not notice how much you two look alike."
"She knows, doesn't she?" I asked. "She always knew."
Alan nodded. The look on his face was grim. "They have both known about you and your mother from the beginning."
I was livid. Instantly. "So, they were good enough for the truth, but Mom and I weren't?" I demanded. I wanted to say more. I wanted to call him a snake and a coward and tell him that he was a horrible human being and an even worse father. I wanted to make him feel like the scum of the earth and I wanted it to hurt. Instead, I shook my head. I waited for him to speak.
"How could I have told you?" he whispered. "I was already married to your mother when I found out about Abigail. I wasn't about to lose the two of you because I hadn't been thinking one time. What would you have done?" he asked.
He and my mother were perfect for each other. They both wanted to be with other people but chose to be content with each other instead. They both had children with those others and neither said a word about it. It was enough to make my stomach churn.
Still... I had to consider it. What would I have done in their shoes? To be honest, since I was trying so hard not to be my parents, I would have come clean from the beginning. If, like my mother, the man I was in love with and fathered my child decided to leave, I would find a way to follow, or stay and wait for him to return. Moving on hadn't done any of the three of them any favors.
"Can I go to my motel now?" I asked.
"I was going to make Alfredo," Alan replied.
I shook my head, despite it being my favorite meal. "I'm not hungry," I said.
Alan sighed and gave me a nod. "We'll go now," he agreed.
Chapter 2 ~Ceres~
The motel room wasn't anything special. The bed was in the middle of the room against the wall. A television sat on top of the dresser across from the foot of the bed, and there was a sink and mirror outside of the bathroom. There was also a breakfast table under the window next to the door. The carpet was dark green, and the bedspread was flowery, much like Addie's dress. The walls were dark paneling. The curtains matched the bedspread. The lamplight was low. It was a
typical cheap motel room.
Alan helped me carry in my luggage without me saying anything to him. He promised to return in time for breakfast the next morning. We could go over what they needed from me then. I wasn't about to guarantee that I'd be in any mood to talk to him by morning, but I figured that I'd try. It couldn't hurt. Neither could a good night's sleep, but it was still far too early for that route. I wasn't ready for sleep, but I didn't want to do anything else either. I thought about roaming the town until I got lost, but then I'd have to call Alan to come find me, which was something else I didn't want to do.
I settled for putting my clothes in the dresser and stacking up the suitcases in the closet. I pulled my laptop out of its case and sat down on the bed. I plugged it in and whispered a thank you to the gods of the Internet that there was free Wi-Fi. I browsed the web before I sent an instant message to the twins about what I had learned at Alan's house. The fact that he'd kept that type of secret from me was what hurt me the most. However, I supposed, it was no different from me not telling him that I'm not his daughter. It was just as difficult a subject to bring up, but I almost felt as though it was my mother's place to tell him. She shouldered the burden of that secret for so long that it almost didn't seem fair for me to spill the beans.
I told them that as well. I didn't know what to do from here. I almost felt like I should get back on an airplane and head to Scotland where I knew all the secrets and I wasn't going to get blindsided. If I did that, I could be there to see the birth of my baby brother....
As tempting as it was, I knew that I needed to be here. I knew that my life had pointed me in this direction for a reason. I wouldn't have gotten onto the plane if I thought for one second that I was going to regret this decision. I just hoped that the morning would bring me something better.
First thing that morning, shrill ringing of my cell phone woke me up. I grumbled to myself as I groped at my nightstand for the device and pushed the slider to answer the call. I brought it up to my ear and tried not to yawn. "Hello?" I mumbled, wondering who dared to call me at such a god-forsaken hour.
"It's Alan," he said. "I just wanted to let you know that Addie and I will be there in half an hour for breakfast."
"'Kay," I mumbled before I pushed myself up. I glanced at the alarm clock. My "god-forsaken hour" was seven in the morning. "See you then," I added before I pulled the phone away from my ear and hung up. I yawned before I got out of bed and stumbled to the dresser. I'd taken a shower before going to bed, since something about long flights and car rides demanded them. It was one less thing I had to worry about. I chose a large sweater that I felt comfortable in and a pair of black jeans that clung to my hips like a second skin. When I finished brushing my teeth and hair, Alan was knocking on my door.
I grabbed my purse and followed him to the car. Once again, I had the whole back seat to myself. The tension was thick in the car and I felt like I needed to get out of it just to be able to breathe. I was so uncomfortable that even my big comfy sweater couldn't shield me from it. I'd never been so glad to pull up to a Denny's and I'd never gotten out of the car so fast. I almost wanted to tell Alan that I'd just walk back to the motel, but the fact that I didn't know my way around stopped me. I wanted to give it a chance to calm down. If things were still tense when we left, I'd be looking for that walking route.
The hostess showed us to a booth and poured us water before she left, telling us that our waitress would be along shortly. We took that time to peruse the menu. I knew what I wanted without having to look hard to find it, but it seemed that Addie didn't have a clue what she was going to eat. Our waitress came along, took our drink orders, and promised to give Addie a few more minutes. I wanted her to take down my order, and Alan's if he was ready, and return for Addie's, but that wasn't exactly the polite thing to do.
When she returned with our drinks, I didn't want to wait anymore. I hadn't eaten since the plane yesterday, so I felt famished. Addie told us to order and when it came time for her turn, she'd know what she wanted. I guessed that she was one of those people who couldn't make decisions until they were under pressure.
We ordered and the waitress walked away. I took a sip of my cappuccino before I gave Alan a direct look. "So, what's going on?" I asked. I preferred to get down to business instead of discussing family matters that still needed discussing.
Alan shifted in his seat. It was clear that he was as uncomfortable as I had been. "Well, um...." he muttered.
Addie sighed as she set down her coffee. "We rented out the house I lived in before your father and I married to a pair of tenants who neglected the upkeep of it," she said. "It's falling apart. We've evicted them and are suing for damages because they never informed us that there was an issue. They are counter-suing us under the allegation that we should have been aware of issues without their reports."
"So, you hadn't seen the house in some time?" I asked.
"Not until we were delivering the eviction notice," Addie replied. "They mailed in their rent, so we never had a reason to believe that there was something wrong with the house. When we went there to deliver the notice, the disrepair shocked us. Besides the repair costs, we're suing them for the rent they didn't pay and the fees they agreed to when they signed the lease."
"And why do you need me?" I asked.
"Our lawyer doesn't seem to want to do any work," Addie replied.
"Okay," I said. "Do you have proof that they never contacted you about repairs needed on the house?" I asked.
"What do you mean?" Alan asked.
"Did they ever send you letters or call you?" I asked. "Can you prove that they didn't?"
"Everything we've received from them is in their file," Alan said. "If they'd sent us a letter, we would have put it there along with a copy of our response. I can pull up phone records if I have to in order to prove that they never called us."
I nodded as the waitress returned with our breakfast. I waited until she walked away, and I couldn't help but notice the look she gave me. It was almost predatory in nature, as if I was some new enemy that she wanted to kill. I did my best to brush it off, and then continued talking with Alan.
"You may need to do that," I said. "The more records you have, the better off you'll be. Have you hired a contractor to appraise the damage yet?" I asked. "You have to have an actual set number to take to court before you can sue for the cost of damages. If you go in there without a professional estimate, they're likely to throw it out."
"We haven't yet, but we can," Alan said. "What else should we do?" he asked.
I shrugged. "From a legal perspective, I can't tell you anything," I said. "I'm not your lawyer, so I can't give you legal advice and I can't represent you in court unless you hire me to replace your current lawyer. What I can say is that, if it were me, I would prepare to have to make the repairs so that the judge has a final number, not an estimate. I'd gather everything you have on this one specific property. I may even pull other properties if I have them, just in case someone wants to triple-check your records. I'd also make sure that I'm not talking to the tenants because that could look to someone like I'm trying to settle out of court. Did they give you a cleaning deposit?" I asked.
Alan nodded. "Of course, but it doesn't come near to covering the cost of what we're going to have to do."
I nodded. "I didn't expect that it would, but keep in mind that they may give you a number minus the cleaning deposit."
Alan nodded. "That's fine," he said.
"And have you taken pictures of everything?" I asked. They nodded, which was a good thing.
"We've photographed every inch of the house," Alan said.
"Okay," I said with a smile. "Look into it and see if the judge will want repairs made before they see your case or if you can go in there with an estimate. Don't start any work until you know that information. I know you said he's not doing anything, but that's a call for your lawyer to make. Worst comes to worst, hire a new one."
"What do we need to do
to have you as our lawyer?" Alan asked. "I'd much rather have you working on our side than the imbecile we have now."
I didn't want to be their lawyer, but I smiled anyway and hid my guilt in my cappuccino, right as the waitress brought me another one. The girl was good, even if she did seem to hate me for some unfathomable reason. She asked us if we needed anything else and walked away when we shook our heads.
I didn't think Alan noticed that I didn't respond to his comment about being his lawyer. I didn't want to tell him yet that I'd quit Mom's old law firm. I didn't have the heart to tell him I had no plans on going back to New York. I knew the knowledge would disappoint him and he would want me to rush back to tell them that I'd changed my mind. I couldn't do it, even if he wanted me to. I had come to a point where I was beyond the point of no return.
After breakfast, Alan took me back to the motel. He promised to return with copies of what he had on file, including the photographs. I promised that I would look it over to see whether it was even worth going to court over. From what they told me, I could see a solid case. Unfortunately, if the tenants had a stronger one, the case would go to them and this would all be a waste of time and money. Alan seemed confident that the case would go his way. Since he and my mom worked together for so long, he knew enough about law to know that he had a shot. However, since he wasn't the one who had the law degree, he based his assumption on hearsay and nothing more.
I lounged on the bed in my motel room, feeling lazy as I flipped through channels on the television and I waited for something to happen. I didn't know what I was waiting for, but it wasn't the knock on the door from Abigail.
I stared at her in shock, wondering why she was standing on the threshold of my motel room. Based on what Alan had told me about her, instead of being here, she should have been at school, teaching the kiddies their ABCs.
"Hi," I said, completely confused by her presence.
Vanilla Moon: Awakening Page 2