She ignored all of us and stepped up to the Enkidu and Skaapie. She bowed her head to them and waited a moment before raising it back up. "I’ve done everything I can for him," she said. "He'll be fine. Luckily, he had a shot of the antigen before they hit him with the second wave of silver. That slowed the poison a considerable amount, but it's obvious that the attacker meant to cause serious harm. We've washed out all the silver powder from the burns and his skin, so there won't be any further damage. He may have a lasting scar. Both injuries are going to take quite a bit of energy to heal."
"Thank you, Diane," Leon replied. "May we see him?"
"I’ve given him a sedative that should wear off in an hour or so. He didn't want to see anyone except for Ceres when he first came in here. I'm not sure if he'll want to see anyone else."
The Enkidu nodded before looking at me. "Ceres, go with Dr. Cyrus. Don't leave Wolfgang's side," he said.
I nodded. "Yes, Enkidu," I said. The doctor gave me a once-over before she sighed. "Come on," she said before she led me back to the examination rooms. She opened the door to the room where Wolfgang lay sleeping on the bed and held it open long enough for me to step inside. The moment I was away from the door, she snapped it shut and left me alone with one of my biggest fears.
When I was six, my godmother's daughter died of cancer. Aside from the twins, she had been my best friend. I'd been sitting in the room alone with her while her mom and mine were talking in the hall. The alarms started to go off all the sudden. I'd backed up into a corner and almost hyperventilated. I watched with a racing heart as the doctors rushed in and tried to save her life. Nothing worked. At the last moment, she sat up in the bed, looked at me, and screamed. Everyone had forgotten that I was still in the room with her. No one rushed me out, and the memory of her stayed with me, always haunting me in the back of my mind. Since then, being alone with anyone in a hospital-like setting scared me. Terrified me....
I swallowed the painful lump in my throat and calmed my racing heart as I walked up to Wolfgang. He looked peaceful from one side, thanks to the medication making him sleep. From the other side... he looked like he belonged in a comic book strip. The silver powder had left its mark. The right side of his face was a blistered mess, just like my neck. There was a gash along his cheek that looked... horrifying. It was almost as though some infection had eaten away the flesh surrounding the gash. The wound looked red, swollen, blistered, and exposed.... I couldn't believe that it was so open. Shouldn't the doctor have worried about infection or something? Was the wound too severe to cover?
I pulled the chair over to his side and sat down as I held his hand in my not broken one. I felt his hand tighten around mine as if he had an unconscious response to my presence. I laid my head down on my outstretched arm and closed my eyes because in that moment, I was too exhausted to do anything else.
When I opened my eyes again, it was to the sound of the door opening and shutting. I looked up as Dr. Cyrus came in to check on things. When Wolfgang also began to sit up, I stood to help him sit and he rubbed at the eye that wasn't swollen shut. I didn't say anything as she looked over his injuries. "I'm going to leave this uncovered," she said. "The area is too large to do much with and you're healing faster than normal. I'm worried that if I cover it, you'll be back in here so that I can cut the bandage out of you." She turned to me and turned my chin up so that she could look at my neck. "Same with you," she said. "That looks like it's a day old now, instead of a few hours. The bond between you two is powerful. It'll only increase when you do finally mate. I imagine that, as a pair, you'll be quite unstoppable."
Wolfgang nodded. "Great," he said. "Can I go?"
Dr. Cyrus chuckled. "Always eager," she said. "Your father wants to talk to you, but yes, you're free to go. Everyone wants to know what happened to you, Volsunga," she said, meeting Wolfgang's gaze.
The way she said his title made Wolfgang's eyes darken. It was almost as if she was saying that because he was Volsunga, he had no choice but to explain things. Even if they were things he didn't want to talk about. "I'll take care of it," he replied with a stern note to his voice before he slid off the gurney and we left the office. Not once did Wolfgang let go of my hand. It was the most calming thing about this whole ordeal.
When we reached the lobby, everyone stood. Wolfgang hugged his parents. "I'll explain everything tomorrow," he said, meeting his father's eyes. "Right now, I just want to go home and sleep."
The Enkidu nodded. "Okay," he said before he hugged Wolfgang. I saw his mouth move, but even though I was this close to them, I couldn't hear what he said. Wolfgang pulled away and nodded before he and I walked out to his truck with Riley following close behind us.
When we got home, Wolfgang and I did our best at helping each other. I was pretty much his other eye and he was both of my hands. When Riley came in to tell us that he'd made dinner, we remembered why all of this had happened. So much for our date....
We sat down at the table in the dining room and ate the spaghetti that Riley had prepared. It was a bit harder for me to eat one handed, so I took the soft cast off my sprained wrist. It wasn't hurting me much anymore and I needed some mobility. If it started to hurt again, I'd put it back on.
The taste of the food surprised me. Ready-made pasta sauce had never been a favorite of mine, but the kind Riley had used surprised me because it tasted good. I was the kind of person who preferred all my food cooked from scratch, but that was because Jalena never took shortcuts in the kitchen. I couldn't cook to save my life, at least not beyond the basics of boiling water and adding the contents of a box, but I was still a picky eater.
We were quiet as we ate, but it was that awkward kind of silence where the questions hung in the air, waiting for a voice no one wanted to give them. Finally, Riley broke the silence. He sighed as he set his fork down. "What the fuck happened out there?" he asked.
Wolfgang took his time as he finished chewing the food in his mouth and put down his fork. "Abigail," he replied in a quiet voice.
"What?" Riley and I both cried.
"She stopped me as I was leaving my parents' house," he explained. "I didn't see any of it coming. I slid on ice when I swerved to avoid hitting her with the car. When I got out, we argued. I tried to leave, and she attacked me. I couldn't do anything...."
I reached out and held his hand. Wolfgang stared at our hands for a moment before he looked up at me. He gave me a weak smile before he picked up his fork to resume eating. He sighed and set his fork back down. He looked up and met Riley's gaze. "Alan and Addie survived," he said. Riley stared at him in shock. "I don't know how," he added.
"But the house exploded," Riley argued. I stared at them in shock.
Wolfgang shrugged. "I know," he said. "I don't know how they did it, I just know it happened. Abigail made sure that I knew."
"You tell your dad?" Riley asked.
Wolfgang nodded. "He knows," he said. "He knew before I got to the clinic." He picked his fork up for the third time and began eating once more. He was rigid and tense. He seemed to project a barrier between him and us. It was clear that the conversation was over.
Riley and I exchanged glances and then turned our attention back to our meal. If he wasn't willing to talk, who were we to force him into it? The only people who had a legitimate right to demand answers from him weren't here.
When Wolfgang and I made our way back into the bedroom, I noticed he had withdrawn and didn't want to open up about what happened. He sat down on our bed and stared at the closet. The closet doors had mirrors on them, so I didn't know if he was staring at himself or if he was staring at something else in the reflection. He gazed downward and sighed. He wasn't quite as rigid now as he had been at the table. He had slumped forward, as if the weight of the day had finally defeated him despite his success at rescuing me.
Unfortunately, there were questions I had to ask, regardless of whether he wanted to answer them or not.
"How did you find me?" I asked.
&
nbsp; Wolfgang looked up at me before he looked back at his injured hands. "Power of deduction," he replied. "I realized that you weren't behind me and when I found the bookstand, I smelled Alan's cologne and realized that he'd come for you. I couldn't think of where he'd taken you because I don't know where he lives. I remembered that you were here because of Addie's house, so I went there first. I figured that they had this big empty house and that it was the perfect place for them to kill a Lycan."
I didn't know what to say, so I stayed quiet in case he wasn't done.
Wolfgang sighed and attempted to smooth his battle-crazy hair. "When I got there, I wanted to go bursting in. Alan and Addie were the only two there at the time, but I'm no match for the two of them by myself.... Riley told me to wait. Waiting meant that seven more people showed up. He, Luke, and I scouted the place out, realized that the best way to get in was through the back door, and did our best to take them by surprise. I killed the first Witch who was just stepping outside for a smoke. Then we rigged the fire to explode the house. I killed the second Witch.... The thing I can't wrap my head around is how easy it was to kill because I was trying to save you. Beforehand I couldn't bring myself to kill anyone if I didn't have to," he whispered as he looked up at me with tears in his bright blue eyes.
I stared at him for a moment. "I'm so sorry," I whispered, near tears myself. "I didn't want you to have to do this," I whispered as tears fell from my eyes. "I didn't want to be the reason you killed again...."
Wolfgang shook his head as he held my non-broken hand in his. "I know," he whispered. He pulled me down and kissed me. "I am not blaming you for anything," he vowed. "I could start today over, know that it would lead to this moment, be unable to do a thing to prevent it, still do it all the same way I did it earlier. Don't ever think that you've caused me to regret your presence in my life. I will walk through hell to be with you," he said. He sighed. "I just hope I don't have to...." This was the first time I'd heard such a level of depression in his voice. I felt compelled to wrap my arms around his shoulders. He wrapped his arms around my waist and rested the uninjured side of his face against my stomach. "I wish I knew what to do," he whispered. "I just want it to be over...."
"What did Abigail do to you?" I asked.
Wolfgang cleared his throat as he pulled away from me enough to look up at me again. "She was standing in the road when I pulled out of my parents' driveway," he said. "I tried to stop when I saw her, but I hit a patch of black ice and crashed into the snowbank. Luckily, it was soft enough that I could get the car back out of it. For some reason, I got out and started screaming at her. I asked her if she was trying to get herself killed.... She's torn up about you. Alan has held her up to your standard all her life, and she's never been able to meet it. Now they know you're Lycan and he still holds her up to your standard in every other way. She says that the worst part of all of it is that I love you. She tried to say that she loves me, but she can't.... She doesn't know how to love anyone..."
I felt like there was a physical pain in my chest. The only man I'd ever loved was telling me that my stepsister, the woman who raped him... was still dragging him down.... I felt completely powerless.
"I love you," he whispered with tears in his voice.
I looked up at the ceiling and felt tears fall from my eyes. "I love you too," I whispered before I kissed the top of his head. "I love you too," I repeated in his hair.
Chapter 19 ~Ceres~
The healing process was a thousand times faster than I thought it was going to be. By the next morning, my neck had almost healed. My broken nose and sprained wrist were completely healed and my broken one felt like it was close behind. Wolfgang's hands had almost healed. His face looked a thousand times better than it had before we'd gone to bed. The outer edge of the blisters had receded, and he had the use of his right eye again. Perhaps changing shape would work miracles if we still had healing wounds by the time the full moon arrived.
Riley didn't say much that day. Neither did Wolfgang. To be honest, I wasn't a big talker that day either. We took a day to recuperate. Wolfgang and I lay in bed most of the day, just watching movies. Wolfgang called his father to explain what had happened the day before, but the conversation was brief. Later, we heard Riley rummaging around the apartment a little after one, but it wasn't long before he returned to his bedroom.
I tried calling my mom one more time. I felt now, more than ever before, that if I didn't talk to her soon that things were going to go south. I needed to be able to tell her what had happened. I needed to be able to tell her that I had almost died because she hadn't thought to tell me the truth. I needed to speak with her and tell her that I knew.... I needed to know she still gave a shit about me.
Once again, the call went to her voicemail. I growled when the recorded message told me, "The mobile number you have reached is not accepting calls at this time. If you feel that you have reached this recording in error, please disconnect the call and try the number again.” I threw my phone across the room. I wanted to scream in frustration. Yet again, my mother had let me down. Yet again, my mother was unavailable to me. Yet again, I had to live with her secret and know that it would all be a little bit better if she would just answer her goddamn phone.
The next week passed in a blur. We healed without much scarring, and before I knew it, we were driving into the woods for the full moon. Wolfgang warned me to dress in things I didn't mind not having when I woke up, or that I wouldn't mind having to wash mud out of if I found them again. He said that when we changed, our clothes would fall off our bodies and get trampled into the ground. He told me that most people left their clothes in their car and presented themselves for the hunt naked. As this was the first time I was going to be meeting these people, I decided to keep my clothes on. When I was comfortable, I could see myself joining them in my birthday suit, but it wouldn't happen before then.
I stayed by Wolfgang's side, clutching his hand in mine as we waded through the people who made up the pack. He was right; almost everyone was nude. The teenagers and other young people who had recently hit puberty dressed in sweats and rags. Those who no longer cared or were so comfortable that it didn't matter, weren't. Wolfgang was one of the naked, which surprised me because of how sensitive he was about his scars.
The pack was so much larger than I thought it would be. The town held two, maybe three-thousand people, and hundreds of them were here in the woods. There were hundreds of people who were about to turn into wolves....
Wolfgang led me up to his parents, who were, of course, showing the world more than I would have ever wanted to see of them. I understood why. They were the leaders of this pack. If they weren't comfortable seeing the rest in their own skin, they had no reason to be up there.
I had a brief thought about where Mira was as she wasn't old enough to shift yet. The Enkidu and Skaapie both watched as Wolfgang and I stepped up to them. When we reached them, the Enkidu took my hand. He held me out in front of him, facing the pack.
"Tonight, we welcome within our fold, Ceres Ainsworth." I saw more than a few people exchange glances at my last name. "I make the formal announcement to you all that I accept her into our fold, as does your Skaapie. Keep in mind that as we run tonight, we run with a new sister. We hunt, we feed, and we embrace the cycle of nature. We become one with the forest. We are pack. We are family. We are Vanilla Moon."
The crowd cheered. The words of our pack's Enkidu were enlightening, empowering, and energizing. A rush seemed to pass through each individual person.
He raised his arm high in the air. With his other hand, he raised a knife and cut his arm. He held his arm out to me. "I am the body and mind of this pack. I am its blood and strength. Drink of me and become one with me. Drink of me, my blood, and become blood. Become pack."
To be completely honest, the thought of drinking anyone's blood completely disgusted me. Mentally. From a human perspective. No matter how disgusted I was or tried to be, the only thing I wanted in that moment was
to lap up the blood dripping down his arm.
And that's exactly what I did. I moved in on his arm and licked the blood up to the cut he'd made. It was as though my instincts, the inner wolf, had completely taken over me. I cleaned his arm and latched my mouth around the cut. I drank. I could feel something awaken within me. I felt a power that I didn't understand. I became one with the pack. I could feel its power coursing through my veins, and it was so hot.
The Enkidu pulled his arm away from me. I knew that it was happening faster than my human mind could process it. Wolfgang stepped up to me. His face swam into view. Sound was distant. Everything around me had become blurry, yet more focused than I had ever seen in my life. Everything sounded muffled, as if they were miles away instead of right around me. I could hear my heartbeat. The firelight gave everything an ethereal glow. Wolfgang smiled at me before his face closed in on mine. He licked the blood off my chin before we kissed. I could feel tension rise through the crowd as he claimed me as his.
"RUN FAST!" the Enkidu shouted his fist high.
"RUN FREE!" Wolfgang and the rest of the pack shouted.
They began running toward us. They moved around the rocks we stood on like water in a stream. The Enkidu, Skaapie, Guardians, Wolfgang, and I waited for them to pass before we started running after them.
It was everything I never imagined it could be. The run made me feel free. It was as if my skin was just liquid and that it wasn't holding me together. I could run and leap and jump unconstrained by the human body I had spent my life trapped inside of.
People around me leaped into the air, making such a seamless change from one body into the other that it was like pouring water from a cup. Wolfgang held my hand while we ran. I knew that he was waiting for me. He was waiting for my body to be ready to make the shift. I leaped into the air. It was as if my entire body lost all form and function. The second my feet left the ground, I transformed. Not into a wolf, not yet. I became pure energy. I was everything and nothing. I was everywhere and nowhere. I knew everything. I was everyone. I knew the universe in ways that could not translate into human understanding. That moment, the moment between the woman and the wolf, was infinite. It was pure power and energy. I could do anything.
Vanilla Moon: Awakening Page 18