Walking through the daylight remains of last night’s fiery destruction had only echoed her inner feelings of devastation. What was left of Goddess World – a couple of walls and a pit of rubble – was still smoking, but at least the flames had gone. The buildings on either side of it were burnt to varying degrees, scorch marks covering a good deal of their facades. An impressive clean-up operation had already taken place on the pavements and road in front of the site, and several police officers and other officials were present, some sifting carefully through the wreckage, others discussing matters in low voices.
Sister Veronica stared out of the window. She felt desolate, empty, as though all the colour in the world had been sucked away. And she felt responsible. How could she not? She’d wanted Sister Catherine to ask her to bring Hope to Glastonbury, yearned for the responsibility of having the baby girl in her charge for a few days. And look what she’d done; accepted alcoholic drinks from people she didn’t know, and not been vigilant enough to notice the baby’s abduction. Shame didn’t even touch the inner hatred she had for herself. She should have known better, but she hadn’t. It was unforgiveable, what she’d done. For all she knew, that Carter and his friends may have had a hand in Hope’s disappearance. Why had she trusted them? How could she have been so naïve and stupid?
‘Why are the officers winding a line of blue-and-white tape in front of the building?’ Her voice was flat, tired. A long-haired waiter, who’d been clearing mugs from a nearby table, turned round, his nose piercing glinting in the dull light.
‘Apparently when the firemen could enter the building they found human remains,’ he said. ‘People round here have been talking about it all morning. Makes you sick, really, what happens to some people.’
‘Do they know who it was?’ Melissa said, immediately thinking of Celeste.
‘No, the body was too badly burned, although I have heard they’re pretty sure it was a female.’ The waiter walked closer to them, balancing a tray. ‘That’s what people are saying, anyway. Looks like the fire was deliberate, they’ve found several sites around the debris where they think blazes were intentionally started. I was back at New Avalon at the time, but some of my friends were here, and they said they couldn’t believe how quickly the fire spread.’
‘New Avalon?’ Sister Veronica sat up, a minute amount of energy reappearing in her veins. If she could do anything to help find Hope, then she absolutely would, and New Avalon seemed like an excellent place to start, and speaking to a resident from the place was more than she could have hoped for. ‘The King Arthur compound?’
‘Yes.’ The man’s lips twitched into a smile. ‘I’ve never heard it described quite like that, but you’re right, it is designed around the theme of King Arthur, and the way we live is influenced by the history and legend surrounding him.’
Sister Veronica introduced herself and Melissa, and gave a quick summary of their reasons for being in Glastonbury; they were looking for a girl called Mona Adkins, her baby had been left on the convent’s doorstep, they needed to find her to make sure she was okay and to see if they could reunite mother and daughter. It was Melissa who had to explain about how Hope had been taken the night before, Sister Veronica couldn’t bring herself to say the words. The waiter’s face immediately changed, his smile vanishing, replaced instead by an intense gaze.
‘Do you mind if I sit down with you for a minute?’ he asked, looking over his shoulder. The café was quiet, and no one was waiting at the counter.
‘Please do,’ Sister Veronica said, pulling out a chair for him. ‘We’re desperate for information, anything at all that could help us.’
‘I’m Lucan,’ the waiter said, sitting down. ‘I’ve lived in New Avalon for getting on thirty years. I knew Mona well. Really well.’
Melissa watched him carefully.
‘I hope you don’t mind me asking,’ she said. ‘But were you guys ever together? As in, in a relationship? Something just now in the way you said that made me think you were.’
‘Yes.’ Lucan exhaled. ‘Freedom of sex among adults at New Avalon is encouraged – sorry, Sister, but it is – but I always loved Mona the best out of all the girls. I know she was a lot younger than me, but we just clicked, you know? Talked for hours, all the way through the night sometimes. She was one of the most genuine people there, she had an honesty about her that was refreshing. She was a complex person as well, a tortured soul on the one hand, but so bright and funny on the other.’
‘Did you know she was planning to leave?’ Sister Veronica picked up her mug. ‘We’ve heard about what happened to her, about the leader’s abuse. Did you know what Art did to her before she told everyone at the meeting that night?’
‘No.’ Lucan sighed, shaking his head, his expression suddenly strained. ‘I had no idea until she said it all that night. I wanted to kill Art when I found out. Still do, really. I couldn’t believe he’d do that to her, and for so many years. What kind of monster abuses their position of trust and responsibility like that? I really wanted to see Mona after it all came out, check she was okay. But she’d vanished. I looked everywhere, I really did. Loads of us did. The next day we realised she and Lance had made a run for it. Turned out, from the amount they’d packed, that they must have been planning to go for a while. They couldn’t have got their things together so thoroughly in just one evening.’
‘Have you seen her since?’ Melissa took a sip of her large latte.
Lucan paused. He seemed to be deciding whether or not to answer.
‘Yes,’ he said, finally. ‘I have seen her, but I’ve never told a soul this, not even anyone at New Avalon. Not just to protect myself, but for Mona’s benefit too.’
‘Go on,’ Sister Veronica said softly, leaning forwards. At last, more information, she thought. Thank goodness we met you, Lucan.
‘I-I missed her so much.’ Tears came to Lucan’s eyes. ‘I really did love the girl, she was so special, and I thought she had feelings for me, from the way she acted. It really hurt when she left, I felt like I’d been dumped – though we’re not supposed to have strictly monogamous relationships at New Avalon. But sometimes you can’t help it, it’s human nature. But even so, last year I decided to go and find her, to talk things over with her, make sure she was okay after everything that had happened. And to be honest, I also wanted to see if there was a chance of us being together, somehow.’
Melissa and Sister Veronica both nodded, understanding.
‘I’d heard she was working as a prostitute in Soho,’ Lucan said. ‘Word gets around, you know, we’re not as cut off from the outside world in the commune as people seem to think. And this broke my heart. Mona was too precious to do that kind of work, to sell her body. But I think Art had broken her self-esteem, made her feel worthless, you know, with all the abuse? Anyway, one day I told Art I was going on a retail trip for the café, but instead I actually took a day off and travelled up to London, and found her pretty quickly after asking around. We chatted for ages, and… er, I spent the night with her.’
‘Did you sleep with her?’ Melissa asked.
‘Yes.’ Lucan nodded. ‘But the next day she told me to go. Said she had a client coming and that I mustn’t be there when he arrived. I asked if we could keep in contact, and she gave me her phone number, but when I got home and tried to call her it didn’t connect. Turns out she’d given me an old number that wasn’t working. She obviously didn’t want me in her life anymore. So I just left it. Until recently, when I suddenly got this feeling that I needed to find her again.’
‘Why do you think that was?’ Sister Veronica said, gazing at him.
‘I don’t know. Listen, this is really hard to explain and you guys will probably think I’m crazy. I think I’m crazy myself half the time.’ Lucan’s brow furrowed and he leant forwards, resting his elbows on his knees. ‘Like I said, I’ve been at New Avalon for nearly thirty years now. I first joined because I needed to get out of mainstream society, away from all the people around me who on
ly believed money and status were important, I found everything about that way of life shallow and soul-destroying. Arriving at New Avalon for the first time felt like coming home to me, I really felt like I belonged. When I found out Art really believed he was the returned King Arthur I didn’t pay too much attention to it. It just seemed like another quirky, fun thing about the place, like make-believe. It took me a while to understand he was actually serious about it. The thing is, he uses his status as a king to rule New Avalon with utter control. He’s spent so long telling us all about God, and what we need to do to get into heaven, and how easy it is for the Devil to get into our hearts. So much has happened over the years, and now I really don’t know what to think. I kind of do believe what Art tells us about salvation, and I’m worried that because of the choices she’s made, Mona may not be saved. She may not go to heaven when the time comes, she may have taken a dark and dangerous path by leaving the commune. And I really want to help her with that.’
Melissa stared at him with wide eyes. Sister Veronica reached forward and patted his knee. Then she sighed.
‘I think I understand you, Lucan,’ she said. ‘I’ve been having a crisis of faith myself. For so long I believed everything I was taught in the Roman Catholic Church. I may not have been the best at following it, but I didn’t question much, I trusted the people who guided me through and gave myself to God in the manner I was told. However, recently I’ve been finding out that several aspects of my church are a sham, and it’s really thrown me into a spiritual quandary.’
Lucan gazed at her, his eyes bright.
‘So you understand,’ he said. ‘How difficult beliefs can be. How they can play with your mind?’
‘Yes,’ Sister Veronica said quietly. ‘I do. But one thing I’ve learned over the last few months, Lucan, and I want you to listen carefully to this; is that when other people around you are saying things that sound mad or unbelievable, don’t give your power to them. Don’t just follow their commands without question. Turn inwards and find your own truth, and listen to it. Because in my opinion, that’s what’s real.’ She sat back.
‘I think I understand what you’re saying, Sister,’ Melissa said slowly, flicking a strand of pink hair away from her coffee. ‘If Lucan really believes Mona is going to hell because of her choices, then fine. But if he has doubts about that, and is only thinking that because it’s what this Art has told him, then it’s better for him to listen to his intuition.’
‘Exactly.’ Sister Veronica took a slurp of tea. ‘That’s exactly what I’m trying to get across.’
‘Thank you.’ Lucan ran his hands through his hair. ‘It’s lovely to hear a voice of reason for once. Everything Art says now makes me feel empty and confused. I think I’ve started to hate him. Is that terrible?’
‘No, not at all,’ Sister Veronica said gently. ‘Sometimes we have to move away from people who were previously heroes to us if what they are doing or saying is harmful in some way, and there’s nothing at all wrong with that. Oh yes, by the way,’ she went on, suddenly remembering her worries, ‘did you ever know someone called Carter, or what did he say his other name was? Oh yes, Lamorak, who used to live at New Avalon?’
‘Yes, I knew Lamorak.’ Lucan looked surprised. ‘He was a nice fellow. Quiet. He left a few years ago, obviously more sensible than me. Why?’
‘We met him yesterday in a café,’ Melissa said. ‘And he told us a bit about New Avalon and Mona. And about what sort of person Art is. We were wondering if he had anything to do with Hope’s abduction, because we were talking to him when she went missing, and some of his friends were buying us drinks. After it all happened I wondered if we’d been duped by them, if his chatting to us was just a cover for his friends snatching the baby.’
‘No, I wouldn’t think so.’ Lucan seemed shocked. ‘Well, of course, it’s hard to really know what goes on in anyone’s mind, but he always seemed like a kind sort of person to me. No, I really don’t think he’d be the sort to do anything like that.’
Sister Veronica sighed again. Perhaps there was no lead there then after all. Which was a good thing, but also left her feeling as helpless as before.
‘I must ask you, Lucan,’ she said seriously, turning to him as a thought occurred to her. Could they even trust the man sitting with them now? How did they know he was telling them the truth? At least one person who’d been in Glastonbury had snatched Hope away from them, and until they found out who that was she couldn’t afford to trust anyone. ‘Did you ever get back in touch with Mona again?’
‘No.’ Lucan shook his head. ‘The idea only occurred to me the other night. Actually, I’ve also been thinking about leaving New Avalon. Terrible things have been happening there.’ A look of fear flashed through his eyes and he looked around, as though checking there was no one he knew listening to what he was saying. ‘You wouldn’t believe what goes on there even if I told you.’
‘Don’t worry,’ Sister Veronica said, with kindness in her voice. ‘No one can hear us. You can speak freely.’
‘What kind of things?’ Melissa said. ‘We do believe you, Lucan. You don’t have to worry about that.’
‘Well, the latest thing,’ Lucan said, checking behind himself again, ‘is that Celeste didn’t come home last night. Art’s gone mad, literally. Been smashing up furniture, whacking people when they get in his way, honestly, I’ve never seen him like this before. He’s usually so in control.’
The colour drained from Sister Veronica’s face.
‘And you say a female body was found in the burnt-out building?’ Nausea rose through her. ‘If she’s missing that could surely be Celeste? Did they find any other bodies? Perhaps a smaller, baby-sized one?’
‘Oh, Sister,’ Melissa gasped. ‘Do you really think that’s what’s happened?’
25
Gareth sat on a London Tube, hugging his secret to himself. He was trying to ignore the grimy smell around him, and the litter of crisp packets, tickets, newspapers and other rubbish strewn across the carriage floor. Externals were so messy sometimes. Gareth liked everything to be orderly and neat. He was wondering why he’d never taken steps to put his plan into action before, and he wasn’t sure of the answer. He’d probably been too afraid to take such a big step, but hearing about Lance’s death had changed all that. He knew he was doing this for his brother as well as for Art. His father’s words kept going round in his head: Do something that matters, Gareth. Something big. Make a stand, make me proud of you. And so his plan had come to fruition in his mind. It must be God talking through him, he thought. And that was a wonderful thing. He’d been waiting for something like this to happen to him his whole life.
The idea had first floated into his head a while back, and had got stronger every time he’d listened to his father, King Arthur, talk about coming back to save Britain, about how the people here needed him. Gareth wasn’t very clear on what his dad was actually doing to save the UK; he knew Art believed that writing was powerful, and that he spent many nights in his study penning letters to different public figures, telling them what they were doing wrong, and setting out clear protocols of behaviour they should follow in the future. He wasn’t sure if any of them ever wrote back. He knew his father didn’t agree with what he called ‘the media machine’, all the advertising aimed at young people, all the glitz and glamour promised if you bought certain magazines. But Art never seemed to do anything about that either. Gareth worried that it was because his father was too busy to take action, what with running New Avalon, which took up most of his time. He never seemed to undertake the bigger projects he talked about. If truth be told, he never really had time for Gareth either. The secret idea Gareth was finally going to put into action now would change all that.
Gareth knew a bigger step needed to be taken in New Avalon’s fight against the evils in Britain – his father had talked about that a lot at meetings – and he’d saved for a long time in order to buy the train tickets he needed, worked extra hours at the phone-c
ase stand in the high-street market. He had to give most of his earnings to his dad, of course, which was only right, how else would they run the commune if everyone didn’t contribute? But he’d been keeping a few pennies back here and there, and at last he’d saved enough.
He knew one thing for sure, one thing his father had drummed into him over the years: King Arthur and the New Knights needed to rid Britain of her wicked ways. They needed to win the war against consumerism and capitalism, and bring her back to a more wholesome way of life. He’d heard his dad say so many times and it was frustrating that none of the other New Knights ever really did anything about this. He shifted position, looking up at the dark walls whizzing by outside the Tube carriage. Gareth liked the dark, it seemed to understand him. But that was wrong, darkness was where the Devil lived. He pulled back his sleeve and scratched his arm; punishing himself for bad thoughts. His father had always encouraged the New Knights to self-harm if they needed to atone for a wrongdoing. Creating a wound like that was a visual sign of your sin, he said. When it scabs, heals and goes, it means God has forgiven you.
Lancelot had let Art down very badly, and Gareth could see how much his death had hurt his father. Poor Lance, his beloved, stupid brother. Perhaps he took after their mother Shirley, she’d been weak too, his dad said. Gareth had never looked for her, never wanted to. His dad said he had everything he needed at New Avalon, and, as usual, he’d followed his words. He wouldn’t fail Art like Lance had, no way. In fact, hearing that his brother was dead had finally given him the fire to leave, to go on his mission, to be the bigger, better person. He was the only son now, and he had to prove himself so that his father would really love him, finally sit up and take notice of him.
The Disciple: a gripping psychological mystery (The Sister Veronica Mysteries Book 2) Page 11