by Wolf, Bree
Once again reaching out for her sister, Louisa rubbed her hands up and down Leonora’s arms as she began to shiver. “What happened to you was awful,” she said gently, aware that her sister was only a hair’s breadth away from falling apart. “What happened might not have left scars upon your body, but it did leave them on your soul. Believe me, I know what it is like to carry something around with yourself that you simply cannot forget, that is tormenting you day and night, that you can’t seem to shake. And my secret is nothing compared to what happened to you. You’re strong for finding the will to get up in the morning, to continue on and try your best, to speak to me about it here, now.” She looked deep into her sister’s eyes, nodding to her encouragingly for there was little else she could do. “Perhaps you should speak to Mother. Or to Grandma Edie. They might be able to advise you better.”
Tensing, Leonora shook her head. “I cannot. I’m not strong enough to go through this again.” She swallowed, lowering her head, then glancing up at Louisa. “If anyone found out what happened, I’d be ruined. All of our sisters would suffer by association with me, their prospects reduced.” Again, she shook her head, determination sparking in her blue eyes. “No, I cannot speak of this to anyone. Only you know, and you must promise me not to say a word to anyone else, not our parents, not Grandma Edie, not our sisters or our brother. No one must know. Promise me, Lou!”
Only too well did Louisa understand her sister’s fears, for what she said was the truth. Society did not care what was wrong or right in the truest sense. All it cared about was that people adhered to its rules. “Phineas knows as well,” she reminded Leonora.
Her sister looked up at her with mournful eyes. “Will you speak to him? Will you ask him to keep it to himself?”
Louisa nodded, unfathomably certain that Phineas would not breathe a word of what had happened that night without express permission. After all, weeks had passed since and he had not said a word. “Your secret is safe with me,” she reassured her sister. “With us.”
Sighing, Leonora leaned into Louisa, resting her head upon her sister’s shoulder. For a long time, they simply sat there, arm in arm, and listened to the wind above. Then Leonora whispered, “Thank you.” The words drifted away, mingling with the soft rustling of the leaves around them. Still, Louisa felt great relief that her sister had finally confided in her. Leonora was no longer alone. She still suffered, but now they could stand together, side-by-side, as always.
Chapter Thirty
Nonsense to Read
“I wrote you a letter.”
Whirling around, Louisa stared up at Phineas. He had all but snuck up on her as she had been standing by the windows in the drawing room, her gaze fixed on the far horizon. “A letter?” she gasped, panic instantly flooding her heart as she looked up at him. Was he mocking her? Had all that he had told her been a lie after all?
“Do not look so worried,” he chided her, the beginnings of an annoyingly amused grin coming to his face. “I understand things have changed between us and that change is always difficult to adjust to. Still, I demand that you stop looking at me with suspicion.”
Louisa drew back, annoyed with his accusation. “I’m not looking at you with suspicion.”
“Yes, you are.” He leaned a little closer, his dark eyes watchful as they trailed over her face. “I can all but read your thoughts upon your face,” he told her teasingly. “You are wondering if I’m making fun of you, are you not? You’re worried that all I promised you was nothing but a lie, is that not so?”
Louisa swallowed, but drew herself up nonetheless, meeting his eyes without flinching. “It is not a far-fetched notion,” she stated vehemently. “Given our history, can you honestly blame me for being cautious?”
Phineas chuckled. “Did you speak to Leonora?” he asked, catching her off guard.
Louisa flinched, unable to prevent it, hating the way his face lit up with glee at seeing her honest reaction. Crossing her arms over her chest, she glared at him. “Don’t look so smug,” she chided. “I assure you it does not become you.”
Still grinning, Phineas moved even closer, until the hem of her skirts brushed over the tips of his shoes. “Then what does become me? Care to enlighten me?”
Louisa raised her chin. “Very little, I assure you.”
Phineas laughed, “You did not answer my question. Did you or did you not?”
Louisa inhaled a slow breath, hating and loving the way he teased her. It riled her, and yet, excitement coursed through her body, making her feel more alive than any other situation she had thus far experienced. “I did,” she conceded, but refrained from saying any more than that.
His grin widened, and he moved closer still until the tip of his nose almost touched hers. “And?”
Louisa could not deny that she too wished for another kiss. However, she would never surrender without a fight, and on some level, she was certain that he would not want her to. “You should not stand so close,” she admonished him, putting a most haughty expression upon her face. “What if anyone should enter? Have you thought of that?”
He did not move. “The door is closed.”
“Are you certain?”
“I closed it myself,” he told her with more patience than she would have thought him capable of.
“But surely it is not locked. Thus, someone could simply open it.” She arched her brows, daring him to contradict her. “And what of the windows?” she went on, allowing her gaze to drift to the side. “What if someone were to walk by and see us?”
A dark chuckle rumbled in Phineas’ throat; yet, his wicked grin remained firmly in its place. “Are you afraid to kiss me?”
“Oh, I assure you I have no intention of kissing you.” Yet, her gaze strayed to his lips, temptingly close to her own.
“Have you forgotten our wager?”
“I have not,” she replied without hesitation. “Nevertheless, the wager stated that you would get to kiss me, not the other way around.” Her lips curled up into a victorious smile when she saw his rather unsettled expression.
Phineas all but swayed toward her in that moment, his hands reaching out to settle upon her waist. His gaze remained fixed upon hers. His breath, though, suddenly appeared the slightest bit unsteady. “Now, do you get to slap me, or do I get to kiss you?”
For another heartbeat or two, Louisa remained quiet, torturing them both. Then she spoke. “You get to kiss me.”
And without a second of hesitation, Phineas did.
The speed with which his lips claimed hers made Louisa utterly weak in the knees. A moment before, she had felt strong and in control, but now, all that was gone. She almost swayed into his arms, her hands clutching his shoulders as his settled more firmly upon her waist, urging her closer.
His fingers once more pinched her chin, gently, almost tenderly, before she felt his knuckles brush along the line of her jaw, teasing her skin. Then his hand slid into her hair above the back of her neck, holding her to him as he deepened their kiss.
Passion swirled around them, and Louisa completely forgot the world that still went about its normal pace not far away. She barely heard the distant voices of her sisters or felt the bright, warm sunshine drifting in through the windows. All she did feel was Phineas.
His hands upon her body. His lips teasing her own. His heart beating against her chest. He felt warm and alive and far from the hazy dream that had occasionally visited her in the night. The solid feel of him made Louisa wish it could always be so.
And then she heard the dim thump of Grandma Edie’s walking stick on the marble floors just outside the door.
“Someone’s coming,” Louisa whispered breathlessly, looking up into his dark eyes that gleamed with daring intent.
In reply, Phineas merely grinned, his hands once more tightening upon her, as he leaned down for another kiss. “Whoever it is, they will walk past.” His head swooped down, and his lips brushed against hers.
Louisa leaned back, trying to escape long en
ough to utter a reply. “Is that wishful thinking? Or can you suddenly see the future?”
Bowing his head, Phineas chuckled, “There is nothing I can say that will make you forget whoever is outside in the hall, is there?” Without waiting for an answer, he took a step back, his hands falling from her waist before he reached up and straightened his jacket.
Running her hands over her dress, Louisa ensured that neither one of them would be looking too obvious. “What you did was far from wise,” she chided as the footsteps outside drew nearer.
“What I did?” Phineas demanded, open amusement in his voice. “I think you mean what we did.”
“Well, I—” Louisa broke off when the door suddenly began to swing open, of course revealing none other than Grandma Edie. She hobbled into the room, leaning heavily upon her walking stick, her pale eyes wide awake and watchful as always.
Louisa swallowed, nonetheless grateful that it was not one of her parents, who had come upon them. “Grandma,” she greeted her, stepping forward with a wide smile upon her face. “How wonderful to see you!”
Grandma Edie rolled her eyes at her. “Oh, don’t act as though you have not just been doing something utterly scandalous!” A knowing chuckle rumbled in the old woman’s throat.
Although Louisa had known her grandmother all her life, she could not help but feel at least a little bit shocked at the old woman’s reaction. Phineas, on the other hand, appeared thoroughly amused, joining in Grandma Edie’s laughter until tears appeared in the corners of his eyes. “You have impeccable timing, my lady,” Phineas complimented her with a rather informal bow. “May I ask what brings you here? At least this time, I’m not here on your behest.”
Louisa stared at Phineas before her gaze swiveled to her grandmother. Why she was surprised, she did not know. After all, she had known that Grandma Edie had sent Phineas to her more than once, leaving them alone together, inviting scandal with open eyes. Why then should this surprise her?
Crossing her arms, Louisa glared at both of them. “Is there anything I should know? Have the two of you made any plans concerning myself? If so, I believe I have a right to know.”
Grandma Edie smiled at her as though they had just been conversing about the weather. “My dear, wait until you reach my age and find yourself watching your beloved grandchildren making a mess of things, then we will talk again.” And with a nod at Phineas, she then turned on her heel—as fast as Grandma Edie possibly could—and headed toward the door, mumbling, “Proceed.”
Rather dumbfounded, Louisa watched the door click shut behind her beloved grandmother. Then she turned to look at the man by her side, amusement still darkening his cheeks. “I love her dearly,” she said with a shake of her head, “but that woman is insane.”
Phineas scoffed, “You are only noticing this now?” He chuckled.
Sighing, Louisa brushed her hands over her eyes, wondering if the last few minutes had only been a dream. Still, her lips still tingled from the kiss they had shared. “I cannot help but think that…” She moved her fingers and peeked through them at Phineas. “I cannot help but think that she wishes for us to be together.”
At her words, Phineas’ gaze sobered, something intense and demanding sparking in those dark eyes of his. He turned toward her, but did not move, his arms crossing over his chest as he leaned back, one shoulder propped against the wall. “Would that be so bad?” he asked, his brows arching upward.
It was not the look in his eyes that sent goosebumps down her arms and legs. Neither was it the question he had so casually asked. Instead, it was the idea of sharing a life with him, something that only a few days ago would have sent her running for the hills, would have made steam come out of her ears, would have seemed utterly ludicrous. Now, however, Louisa could not deny that her skin hummed at the thought of him as her husband. But was it honestly what she wanted? And what about him? Was she merely a conquest for him? Was it the chase that drew him near? The challenge she presented?
“You’re not answering me,” he observed rather nonchalantly.
Giving herself a shake, Louisa squared her shoulders, determined to steer them back to something less terrifying. “You said you wrote me a letter,” she exclaimed without thought, surprising herself. “Why? Why would you do that?”
Phineas chuckled, giving her a look that all but said, I know exactly what you’re doing. “Why should I not?” he teased in that usual way of his. “I thought it might be sufficient temptation to inspire you to work with me.”
Louisa frowned. “Work with you? What do you mean?”
Pushing off the wall, he stalked toward her, his dark gaze fixed upon hers. “You want to learn how to read, do you not?”
Confused, Louisa stared at him, uncertain what he was about. Was he teasing her again? Or was he serious?
Stopping in front of her, he reached out a hand, the backs of his fingers brushing against hers. Then he took another step closer and wrapped his large hand around hers, holding it gently. “Do you want to learn?” he asked, and this time there was no humor there, neither in his face nor in his voice.
Louisa swallowed, suddenly terrified by this seemingly insurmountable task. What if she tried and could not do it? What if it turned out that despite what Phineas and Leonora believed she simply was not intelligent enough for the task?
“Do you want to?” he asked, his dark gaze gentle and encouraging as he looked at her, his fingers brushing tenderly over her own.
Unable to speak, Louisa merely nodded as her heart thundered in her chest, terrified but also elated.
Phineas smiled at her, a kind, devoted, heartwarming smile. “Then I shall help you,” he told her, “if you let me.”
As the promise of redemption washed over her, Louisa found herself surge forward, her arms wrapping around his shoulders as she buried her head in the crook of his neck. “Thank you,” she whispered repeatedly, wishing she could express how much his offer meant to her.
* * *
An utterly bewitching frown came to Louisa’s face, and Phineas felt the overwhelming desire to kiss it away. “The cat with the hat sat on the mat?” Louisa read from the small sheet of parchment he had set in front of her. Then she looked up at him, her frown deepening. “That is nonsense. Why would you give me nonsense to read?”
Phineas laughed, loving the way she always criticized his approach. “It is not nonsense,” he insisted, unable to resist the urge to tug on the soft curl swinging from her right temple. “It is simple, yes, but it is not nonsense. It is merely a first step.”
Still eying him with a doubtful expression upon her lovely face, Louisa pulled back, removing her golden curl from in-between his fingers. “Are you saying that we will continue like this?” Her gaze moved to the other sheets of parchment he had given her over the last few days. She gathered them together, her eyes sweeping over the words and sentences written there. “The pot on the cot is not worth a lot. The pen and the hen and eight men make ten,” she read, then looked up at him. “Seriously?”
Phineas laughed, “What do you suggest we do?” he asked, fighting for breath as she tried to glare him into oblivion. “That we work our way from A to Z through the encyclopedia?”
If possible, Louisa’s glare darkened even further. “Will you stop teasing me?” she snapped, her hand gesturing rather wildly at the parchments on the table. “This makes me feel like a child. I’d rather begin with words that…have more relevance to my life.”
Inhaling a deep breath, Phineas tried his best to appear serious. “I understand your frustration, and believe me, I’m not laughing about you. I’m laughing because you are so very adorable.”
“Adorable?” Her face scrunched up as though he had just hurled the most insulting insult of all insults at her face.
“Yes,” Phineas insisted, reaching out to grasp her hands and pulling her to her feet. “The way you glare at me is adorable. The way you scrunch up your nose is adorable. The way you look thoroughly disgusted is adorable.” He sli
pped his arms around her, ignoring her efforts to push him away—not that she was truly trying. “So, if you do not want me to call you adorable, then stop distracting me.”
Louisa chuckled, “I’m distracting you? How on earth could I possibly be distracting you?” She rolled her eyes at him. “We’ve been cooped up in this room for an hour and all you’ve giving me to read are sentences that are worse than nursery rhymes. Please, tell me how I am distracting you.”
Grinning at her, Phineas simply bent his head and kissed her.
For a moment, Louisa seemed a bit taken aback, but then her arms rose, her hands moving up onto his shoulders, her fingers tracing the line of his neck. A soft moan escaped her lips as she returned his kiss, clearly not offended by the liberties he was taking.
“I asked you to tell me,” she whispered against his lips, a playful note in her voice.
Phineas chuckled. “I’ve always been better at show than tell.” And he kissed her again.
“Is this why you offered to help me?” Louisa demanded, pulling back before once more brushing her lips against his. “So, you can kiss me? Again, and again?”
Phineas saw no reason not to do what she accused him off. “A thoroughly thought-out plan,” he mumbled between kisses, “if ever there was one.”
Indeed, Phineas had to admit that things could not have worked out better if he had indeed planned for them. After two years of trying to figure out why Louisa loathed the very sight of him, two years of teasing her so she would not run off, two years of savoring each precious moment she granted him, Phineas felt like the luckiest man on earth.