Twelve Years

by S. L. Adams

  “Okay, don’t squeeze too hard,” she laughs. “I’m in a delicate condition.”

  “I’ve never been to a beach wedding,” I say, laughing as I lift my leg to reveal a white sandal hiding under my floor length, orange gown. I have to wonder about the practicality of long dresses that will drag on the sand.

  “I have,” Claire says. “It’s nice, but you get sandy feet.”

  I glance over at Gretchen. She’s been quiet since the limo picked us up. The guys drove to the resort in a separate vehicle earlier this morning. I haven’t seen Alex today. But I have to walk down the aisle with him. That should be interesting.

  “You ok, Gretchen,” I ask, eying her cautiously. She vomited before we left. It’s unfortunate that her morning sickness chose to appear for the first time on her wedding day. Sometimes life’s a bitch.

  “Yeah,” she giggles nervously, glancing at the other women. “Just last minute jitters.”

  Uh huh. Sure Gretchen. I shoot her a knowing grin. Hopefully, she doesn’t toss her cookies at the altar.

  The wedding is taking place at a beachside resort on the far end of Oahu. As soon as the limo comes to a stop, the door opens.

  I stare at the man I presume to be the wedding planner. He’s wearing a bright pink blazer with a puffy white blouse underneath, paired with black skinny jeans and Jimmy Choos.

  “Hello, ladies,” he gushes in a strong southern drawl. “Who’s ready for a fabulous wedding? I’m Kody and I will be in charge of the festivities today.”

  After we file out of the car, he ushers us through a side exit into the building. I watch with amusement as he fusses over Gretchen’s dress.

  “Um, Kody. Can you excuse me for a second?” Gretchen jumps up, bolting for the bathroom. I see the other girls exchange curious looks as we sit quietly listening to her puke her guts out.

  Kody stares at the bathroom door, his lush red lips curling into a sneer of disgust as he wrinkles his nose. “Honey, what did you eat this morning?” he enquires when she returns from the lavatory.

  “Nothing,” she replies softly. “It’s just nerves.”

  “Honey, I was born at night, but it wasn’t last night.” Kody stares at her knowingly, his eyebrow cocked, hands on his narrow little hips. “I think somebody got in trouble before she got the ring on her finger.”

  A knock on the door saves Gretchen from having to answer. Lester and Bart enter with Alex and Gretchen’s dad right behind them. I suck in my breath when I see Alex in his tuxedo. My man cleans up well. Except, he’s not my man, I remind myself. He probably doesn’t even want me anymore after the horrible things that I said to him the other night. His eyes scan the room before landing on me. I stare down at my sandals peeking out from under my dress. A flurry of butterflies take flight in my stomach when I see him approaching.

  “Hey,” he says quietly, his voice hoarse.

  I gaze up into his gorgeous emerald eyes. “Hi. You look very dashing in your tux.”

  “Thanks.” He extends a hand and I take it, rising out of the chair. “You’re breathtaking, Shelby.” His eyes burn into mine while the heat pours out of him through his hand that is wrapped tightly around mine.

  “Thank you.”

  He leans in, whispering softly as his lips graze my ear. “Can we call a truce? At least for today for the bride and groom.”

  “Of course,” I day, smiling up at him as we line up.

  Kody makes his way down the line, flashing his jewellery studded digits in our faces. “Walk slowly. It’s not a race. And remember you are on sand. We don’t need any face plants. That would just be a disaster of epic proportions.”

  I glance back at Gretchen just before I head down the aisle with Alex. She’s glowing, the morning sickness a distant memory as she prepares to go meet the love of her life and marry him. I look up at the man on my arm. Alex Benson is the love of my life. I’m so stupid. Why would I push him away? The past is just that. The past.

  We make our way down the pink runner that has been laid out over the sand. I reluctantly let go of Alex and take my place next to Claire and Joanna. As I watch my friend walk down the aisle my eyes scan the small group of guests that have flown in for the ceremony.

  I almost drop my bouquet when my eyes meet with a pair of bright blue sapphires that I know very well.

  Fitz!

  Chapter 31

  Shelby

  What the hell is he doing here?

  I tear my eyes away from Fitz and return my attention to the bride, where it should be. How dare he show his face at Gretchen’s wedding? The minute he ended our relationship, his invitation was null and void. I can’t deal with him today.

  My stomach twitches with nervous tingles as I listen to my friends take their vows. Alex stares at me through the entire ceremony, his expression as serious as a Funeral Director. God, he’s intense. It’s a side of his personality that I rarely saw when we were together at Remington’s. Of course, he’s not the twenty-one-year old, carefree college guy that he was back then. Life has been hard for him, what with his football injury and a failed marriage.

  The waves roll in just a few feet away from where we’re standing. Calm and gentle on this gorgeous Hawaii afternoon. Crisp, clean, golden sand stretches for miles. As far as the eye can see, actually. The fresh, salty humid air mixed with the sweet smell of Plumeria fills my nostrils.

  I can sense Fitz’s eyes on me as I walk back down the aisle with Alex and pose for multiple photos. He doesn’t approach me. Fitz is a polite man. He would never dream of making a scene. That’s not his style. He’ll wait until I’m alone. I want to get rid of him before Alex finds out he’s here so I head to the bathroom at the first opportunity. When I come out, Fitz is standing outside. I know him so well.

  “Hello, darling.” He smiles, his eyes scanning my body. “You look smashing.”

  “What are you doing here, Fitz?” I fold my arms under my breasts and glare at him.

  “I missed you.”

  “So you decided to fly to Hawaii to tell me that? Ever heard of a text message?” I feel the anger rising, bubbling up my throat like a volcano on the verge of erupting.

  “Yes. The brownstone is too quiet.”

  “Well get used to it. I’m moving out as soon as I get back.”

  “I wish you wouldn’t, darling.”

  “You dumped me, Fitz. Remember?”

  “I made a mistake, Shelby. I want you back.” His voice is devoid of emotion. Like he’s talking about an object that he gave away and then decided he wanted back. That’s Fitz. All business. Practical. He reaches out and grabs me, pulling me into his arms.

  “Fitz, stop,” I say, pushing on his chest with my palms.

  “Get your hands off her!” Alex shouts, rounding the building that houses the lavatory and shoving Fitz. He stumbles backward, caught off guard by the surprise attack. Alex grabs him by the shirt, his face contorted with anger.

  “Alex!” I admonish, pulling on his arm. “Let him go. Do you really want to beat up an old man?”

  “Whoa, buddy,” Fitz says, putting his hands up. “It’s all good. I’m Shelby’s husband.”

  “You are no such thing,” I hiss.

  “Sorry. Common Law Husband. Same thing.” He shakes his head.

  “You’re Fitz?” Alex asks, his face turning a deep shade of crimson.

  Shit.

  “Alex,” I say quietly, maintaining my firm grip on his forearm. “Let’s go back to the reception. Fitz was just leaving.”

  “If we weren’t at my best friend’s wedding, I’d kick your ass, old man. You’re a predator who took advantage of your student. She was vulnerable. And you used her and then tossed her aside like garbage.” Alex clenches his jaw as he wraps his arm possessively around my waist.

  “It’s none of your business. This is between Shelby and myself.” He glares at Alex as he straightens his shirt, uncharacteristic anger overriding his normally affable demeanour. Fitz is clearly not impressed as his eyes dri
ft down, zeroing in on Alex’s hand caressing my hip.

  “Oh, that’s where you’re wrong. Shelby was mine long before she met you and she’s mine now. I love her and I want to give her all the things that you couldn’t.”

  Fitz studies Alex, his eyes narrowed as he rubs his chin between his thumb and index finger. “I know all about you, Alex. Shelby told me how you stole her innocence and then disappeared without a word. When I met her, she was an emotional mess. Unable to have a healthy relationship because she refused to let herself trust a man again. Every guy she met was punished for your betrayal. I took her under my wing and brought her out of her shell. Showed her how to trust again. Trained her to be a highly skilled lover capable of pleasing men with demanding sexual expectations.”

  He folds his arms, cocking an eyebrow without breaking eye contact with Alex. “Tell me, Alex. Did you sleep with my wife?”

  “That’s none of your business, Fitz. And stop calling me your wife.” I’m getting really tired of this pissing match. Somehow, I’ve got to find a way to get Fitz to leave before Alex loses his shit.

  “This is between Alex and I, darling.” His condescending tone makes my blood boil. “No need to answer, Alex. It’s written all over your face. I bet she rocked your world.”

  I cringe, placing myself between Alex and Fitz. Before Alex can throw the punch that I know he’s itching deliver, I slap Fitz. Hard.

  Shock rolls across his face as he rubs his cheek. “I don’t think that was really necessary, was it?”

  “You need to leave right now,” I say between gritted teeth. “Otherwise, you’re going to start a brawl and ruin a wedding. Is that what you want, Fitz?”

  “No, darling. I wouldn’t think of it.”

  “Good. Now get out of here.”

  “You heard her,” Alex growls, clenching his fists at his side. “Get the fuck out of here.”

  “Relax, big fella. I’m leaving.” He turns his attention to me, his soulless, blue eyes boring into me.“We will discuss this further when you get back to New York, Shelby.”

  I stare at the man in front of me. A man I spent five years of my life with. Five years during which he controlled me and treated me like a possession. How did I stay with a man who never showed me any tenderness or affection. Never told me he loved me. Never asked me what I wanted. An overwhelming wave of clarity washes over me.

  “No,” I say, my voice coming out strong despite the fact that I’m trembling on the inside. “There’s nothing to discuss. It’s over between us.”

  “You don’t really mean that, darling.”

  “Yes I do, Fitz. I appreciate everything that you’ve done for me but it’s time for us to go our separate ways.”

  He presses his thin lips together as an exasperated sigh escapes his throat. “I’m not going to stand here and argue with you. I don’t want to make a scene, Shelby. You belong with me. Come home and we can forget all this and get on with our lives.”

  “No. I’ve been given a second chance with Alex and I’m going to take it. I met him when I was eighteen. He was my first love.” I smile lovingly at Alex. “And I never stopped loving him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him.”

  Alex grins widely, pulling me into his arms. “I love you, Shelby Richardson. I’ve never letting you go again.” He pulls back from the hug and leans down, capturing my lips in a soft caress.

  Fitz clears his throat. “Well, I guess there’s nothing else I can say. You’ve made your decision, Shelby.” Turning to Alex, he points his long, thin finger. “You better be good to her.”

  “I plan on it.” Alex replies curtly. “Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have wedding duties.”

  “Good bye, Fitz,” I say softly. I glance over my shoulder as Alex leads me back toward the reception. He looks so sad and lost, standing alone under a palm tree. I spent five years of my life with him. Lived with him. Slept with him. But I never loved him. Not the way I love Alex. And now I finally get to be with my soul mate. It feels surreal, but so right.

  The stars twinkle brightly, lighting up the night sky as the waves lick the sand in soft laps against the shore. Etta James’ classic, At Last, pours from the speakers. Alex holds me tight, resting his chin on my head as we sway to the music.

  “I love you, baby doll,” he whispers.

  “I love you too, Alex.” I gaze up at him, running my fingers through his hair as I lose myself in the sea of love pouring from those amazing green eyes. The eyes that haunted my dreams for twelve years.

  “Will you come to Ann Arbor?”

  “I could do that,” I whisper. “If that’s where you are, then that’s where I want to be.”

  “I can’t leave my mom. She needs me.” He smiles sadly, running his thumb along my jaw. “She has Multiple Sclerosis.”

  “Oh, I’m so sorry, Alex.”

  “It’s a shitty disease. She can’t walk anymore. I had to put her in respite care while I was away. But I think it’s going to end up being permanent.”

  “Is she ok with that?”

  “Oh yes. She is getting better care and she’s not lonely. Lots of people to talk to and social activities. Better than sitting alone all day waiting for me to get home.”

  “I suppose.” I’m estranged from my family so I can’t really relate. My mom died a few years ago. Lung cancer. Not surprising considering all the stuff she smoked. The last time I saw her was at the detention centre in Missoula when I was eighteen. I haven’t been home once since that horrible day when I sent my siblings to foster care. I keep in touch with my older sisters, but I don’t even know the younger ones.

  “I moved in with her after my marriage ended. I thought I could take care of her, but I can’t. Her house is tiny. Big enough for me, but,” he pauses and rests his forehead against mine. “If you come home with me, we would need to buy something bigger.”

  “Oh yeah?” I ask. “How big?”

  “Well, I want at least four kids, so pretty big. With a large yard.”

  “Four?” I laugh nervously. What have I gotten myself into?

  He chuckles, pressing his lips to the top of my head. “How about we start with one and go from there?”

  “Sounds like a plan.” I know if I want to be with Alex, I have to give him a child. It’s important to him. And for the first time in my life, I can actually see myself as a mother.

  His face breaks out in the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on any face. My body floods with warmth. I put that smile there. On the man I love. There’s no better feeling. We continue to dance, oblivious to everything and everyone.

  When Gretchen throws her bouquet, she tosses it right towards me. And I catch it. Then Alex catches the garter. It’s the perfect end to the night.

  “I missed you the last two nights.”

  “I missed you too, baby doll,” Alex says as he slips off his suit jacket and tosses it on a chair. “And the pull out couch is really uncomfortable.”

  “I’m sorry, baby.” I wrap my arms around his neck, gazing up at him with a coquettish grin. “How about I make it up to you?”

  He growls appreciatively before grabbing my ass and taking my lips in a heated kiss. When he pulls away, there’s no playfulness in his eyes. The intensity pouring from his carnal stare says it all. My man means business tonight. He knows what he wants and he has every intention of taking it. “No kinky stuff tonight. I want to make love to you, Shelby.”

  My heart kicks rapidly at my chest wall as I absorb the emotions pouring from his eyes. Alex knows how to have fun, but there’s a serious, grown up man inside that sexy body. A man more than ready to settle down. It scares me a little. I’m thirty, but I don’t necessarily see myself as a mature adult.

  He covers my neck with open mouth kisses while his hands reach behind me to unzip my dress. It slips to the floor, settling into a silky pile at my feet. His eyes rake over my white bustier and matching lacy panties. “Fuck me, you’re gorgeous,” he groans.

  I slip out of my lingerie withou
t breaking eye contact with him. When I’m completely naked, he scoops me up and carries me to the bed. After he places me onto the mattress, he strips off his clothes and climbs into the bed.

  “I want you so bad,” he groans. He covers my body with his, kissing me and touching me everywhere. His bare cock presses against my entrance as he takes one of my nipples in his mouth, sucking and licking while I writhe with arousal.

  “Can we skip the condom tonight?” he whispers, his face hovering over mine while his emerald eyes shine in the glow of the moonlight pouring in through the balcony doors.

  Jesus. He doesn’t fuck around. Alex is dying to have a kid. I can’t crush the hope pouring from his eyes.

  “Okay,” I hear myself say. Did I really just agree to that? It sure sounded like my voice. Holy smokes!

  “Oh, Shelby,” he gushes. “I love you so fucking much.”

  “I love you too,” I whisper as he enters me in slow, gentle thrusts. Bare. With nothing between us. I run my hands up and down his back, enjoying the relaxed pace of our lovemaking. Our eyes lock for a second before he kisses me softly on the lips and pulls out.

  “What are you doing?” I gasp, reaching for his ass to bring him back.

  He grabs me by the hips and drags me to the end of the bed. “As much as I’m enjoying making sweet love to you, I have a job to do. And I’m not going to get it done like that.”

  My pussy pulsates in anticipation as he brings my butt to the very edge of the mattress. He hooks his arms under my knees spreading me wide open before he plunges into me in one hard, deep thrust.

  “Oh fuck,” I yell. “Fuck, Alex. Fuck me. Hard!”

  He slams into me again, his balls slapping against my ass. I reach between us and grab my clit as I thrust against him, clamping down on his cock as an intense orgasm tears through me. My head falls backwards onto the bed. The aftershocks pulsate through my body. Alex pulls me closer, holding my hips still with his hands as he fucks me with long, deep strokes. He picks up speed, his breaths coming rapidly just before he comes inside me.