by Dana Mason
Erin shook her head as her eyes followed him. “No, Daddy.”
“Why do I feel like something is missing here? You better not lie to me.”
“Daddy . . . that’s everything.”
“You’re sure?”
“Brian, you’re not interrogating a suspect here,” Melissa said.
“I get that, Lis, but my gut is telling me something isn’t being said here.”
Melissa held up her right hand. “That’s everything I know, I swear.”
Brian nodded and glanced at Erin. “Erin?”
“There’s nothing else,” she mumbled with a shrug.
“Listen up.” He pounded the table with his index finger until Erin looked up at him. “Ali told him, if he even looks in your direction again, she’ll file harassment charges against him. I need you to tell me if he bothers you at all. If I have to, I’ll request a restraining order or I’ll switch you to another school.”
Erin shook her head adamantly. “No, I don’t want that.”
“Then stay the hell away from him.”
“I will,” she whispered.
“And communicate with me. I need to know what’s going on in your life, especially if it’s something I can help with—and this, I could’ve helped with.”
“I will, Daddy. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Mom.”
“I don’t care about that, Erin.” He leaned forward and took both her hands. “This is not your fault. I’m not upset that you didn’t tell me about Mom, I’m upset you were put in this position in the first place. I’m upset he’s been harassing you since your mother’s death and you haven’t told me. I can’t protect you if I don’t know what’s going on.”
“I understand,” she said. “I’m sorry.”
“Stop apologizing. Please. Go upstairs I want to talk to Melissa.”
“Please don’t fight,” Erin said.
“It’s fine, babe, I just want to talk to her. I’m not angry, and you’re not in trouble. Okay?”
Tears spilled from her eyes again. “I’m sorry.”
Brian stood up and embraced her. “Don’t, babe. It’s okay. I’m sorry we adults keep screwing things up.” He held her close for a long time, kissing the top of her head. “I love you.”
Erin nodded. “I love you, too.”
When the door closed behind her, Brian lowered his face to his hands. Melissa reached out for him, but he moved away from her.
“Brian, she trusts me. Do you understand how important that trust is?”
He nodded into his hands.
“What would have happened if she didn’t trust me enough to call me yesterday?”
“I get it, damn it . . .” He dropped his hands to the table. “Fucking Julie. How could she put Erin through this? When she found out Erin had quit the swim team, she had a freaking fit. That selfish bitch.”
Melissa nodded. “It’s been killing me. Not being able to tell you.” She reached out, but he avoided her again. She lifted her foot off the other chair and haphazardly stood. “I’ll see you later,” she whispered, grabbing her purse.
This time, Brian reached out for her. He took her hand and pulled her back. “Don’t leave, Lis. I’m sorry I got so upset. This must have been weighing pretty heavy on your mind.”
She lowered herself back down into the chair. “Do you have any idea how hard it’s been keeping this from you?”
Brian closed his eyes. “I’m sorry I gave you such a hard time.” He ran his hands through his hair then opened his eyes and met hers. “I’m trying to move on. I’m trying to move us past this. Listen, Lis . . . it’s her birthday, and she’s spent every second of today stressing over this. Let’s do something, get her out of the house.”
Melissa smiled. “That’s a good idea—” She was cut off by the doorbell.
Brian rolled his eyes. “Now what?”
He got up and left the room then returned a moment later, followed by Matt Wilson, carrying a baker’s box.”
Melissa smiled at Matt. “Did you bring Erin a cake?”
“Um . . . my mom sent it over.” His face blushed a little under her and Brian’s scrutiny. “When she found out Erin wasn’t having her sweet sixteen party, she wanted to make sure Erin had a nice cake to celebrate the day.”
Brian smiled slightly. Although she didn’t think Matt noticed, Melissa had, and she could tell Brian liked this kid in spite of himself.
Brian took the box from Matt. “Forget it, Wilson. Eighteen.”
“Six months ago, sir, you said sixteen.” Matt’s shoulders slumped. “You don’t trust me?”
“I was you once, kid. As a matter of fact, I was nineteen when Erin was born. I know exactly what happens to teenage boys with hard-ons.”
“Brian!” Melissa said.
“I would never do anything to hurt Erin . . . and you said sixteen. What can I do to earn your trust?”
Brian exhaled a hard breath and shook his head. “Why don’t you run upstairs and get her. She’s not having the best birthday. This will be a nice surprise”
“So . . .” Matt stood his full height, which was nearly taller than Brian’s six-foot-three inches, and asked, “Sixteen?”
“Let me think about it.”
Matt nodded and turned to leave the room, but stopped when his eyes met Melissa’s. “You feeling better today, Ms. Parker?”
“I am. Thank you for asking,” she said.
When he turned out of the room, Melissa stared up at Brian for a long moment.
He fidgeted before throwing his hands in the air. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
“What is wrong with you? ‘A teenager with a hard-on?’ Really, Brian?”
“I’m right! And I don’t want my daughter getting in over her head with a boy who’s too old for her.”
“But you like him.”
Brian brushed a hand at her. “He’s too old for her.”
“But you like him, don’t you?”
“Uh, he’s not a bad kid.” He shrugged. “He has honest eyes. He’s a good kid.”
“He can’t be much older if he’s still in school.”
“He’s eighteen, a senior.” Brian took a seat at the table across from her. “He’s already taking college courses, studying to be a paramedic. He seems much older than my little girl.”
“Sounds like you know him pretty well.”
“He’s in ROTC and was in the police explorers program for a couple of years. He wanted to be a cop for a long time, then up and changed his mind last year and started volunteering at the firehouse instead.”
A thunder of footsteps sounded on the stairs, and within seconds, Erin, Matt, and Cody were in the kitchen, all smiling as if someone had just told a joke.
Melissa couldn’t believe the smile on Erin’s face. She hadn’t seen that smile since summer break when Julie was still alive.
“Dad, Matty brought tickets to the GoKart track,” Cody said, bouncing on his heels. “Can we go?”
Brian looked from Cody and Matt to Erin’s smiling face. “Erin, you want to go racing on your birthday? It’s not very girly. Wouldn’t you rather go shopping or something?”
As her shoulders drew back in indignation, the smile dropped from her face and her eyes narrowed. “Why? You scared I’m gonna beat you, Dad?”
Matt took a step back. “Oh, she’s calling a throwdown.”
“You challenging me, kid?” Brian asked, gesturing toward his chest. “You challenging your old man?”
Her hands landed on her hips. “You better believe it.”
The energy crackled between them as their matching eyes glared at each other. It was obvious Brian’s eyes weren’t the only thing he passed down to his daughter. She had also inherited his competitiveness.
“Let’s go,” Brian said. “We’ll eat cake when we get back.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Exhaustion set in when Melissa entered Brian’s house that evening. Hobbling around the GoKart track on a bad foot and
the beating she’d taken when Jeffries threw her to the ground did not help. She could barely hold her eyes open, but the exhaustion was worth it. Erin had a great birthday. She’d smiled all day, as had Brian, Cody, and Matt. Melissa hadn’t had so much fun in a long time, and all she’d done was watch. It was wonderful to see everyone enjoy a day after months of heartache. It was nearing nine o’clock when they returned. Matt said his goodbyes to everyone, watching Brian expectantly, but Brian hadn’t budged on the new dating rule.
Once Matt was gone and the kids were upstairs getting ready for bed, Melissa thought she’d work on him some. Surely he couldn’t have forgotten what it was like to want to be with someone at that age.
She sat down on the chair in the living room, cornering Brian with her glare.
“What?” he said at the expression on her face.
She couldn’t hide the grin. “He’s sweet to Erin.”
“He came around months ago wanting to ask her on a date.” He waved a dismissive hand in the air. “But hell no, not at fifteen.”
Melissa leaned forward. “Brian, we dated at fifteen.”
He pointed at her. “That was different.”
“How?”
He dropped his hand. “It was different.”
“This doesn’t appear to be any different.”
“Wipe that smile off your face. Nothing about this is funny.”
She laughed at his brooding face. “It’s actually very sweet . . . and she isn’t exactly a little girl anymore.”
“That’s not funny either.”
“Brian, you told him sixteen. You can’t go back on your word like that. What are you teaching them?”
“I don’t care! I’m keeping my kid out of trouble.”
“You’re acting like my mom. Don’t you remember her trying to keep us apart?”
His eyes grew wide. “Yeah, and maybe she was right.”
“What?” Melissa drew back. “How can you say that?”
“Look how things turned out.” He closed his eyes and mumbled, “Everything went to hell, and we both got our hearts broken.”
Melissa’s stomach rolled, realization slamming into her. He regretted her . . . regretted their relationship. Of all the feelings she’d had over the years, she never regretted loving him. “Hmm . . . and here I thought I was the only one who got her heart broken.”
He slapped his hands on his knees as he jumped to his feet. “Well you’re wrong, and I don’t want Erin to go through that.”
Melissa pursed her lips and nodded. She didn’t have anything to say to that . . . or maybe she just didn’t know what to say. All these years she assumed Brian was indifferent to her, that indifference hurt her beyond what she could ever describe, but now she didn’t know what to think, didn’t know how to react to such a shift in her perception.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring this up. I don’t want her to get hurt.” His fingers stabbed through his hair when he paced away from her.
“I didn’t realize. I guess I should have.” She lowered her eyes. “I guess it doesn’t actually matter, not anymore, but still . . .”
Brian turned to face her. “What are you talking about?”
“I didn’t realize you regretted being with me . . . back then.”
“What? No! What?” He lowered himself down on the couch and the line between his eyes deepened when he focused on her. “I don’t regret . . . what do you mean?”
“You just said—”
“I said my heart got broken, too. That doesn’t mean I regret you.” He reached out for her hand. “Melissa . . . I regret hurting you, but I don’t regret being with you or falling in love with you.”
Melissa swallowed down the lump in her throat, at a loss for words again. She pulled her hand away and twisted Chase’s engagement ring around her finger. “It doesn’t really matter anymore, does it?”
“Yes, it matters. You still matter to me.”
She cleared her throat, uncomfortable now and wishing she hadn’t said anything. “Brian, if you push this, they’ll find a way to be together behind your back . . . just like we did.”
Brian pointed toward the front door. “That kid wouldn’t dare try to date Erin without my permission.”
“Okay, obviously you trust him. So, what? You don’t trust Erin?”
“It doesn’t matter who I trust.” He stood up again to pace. “It’s not happening, and if they try to get together behind my back, I’ll kick his little ass.”
“It’s beautiful . . . how much you want to protect Erin, but you can’t protect her heart. She needs to be open to love. It’s important to let her experience this in her own way, and in her own time. You can’t push your beliefs, your experiences off on her. That’s exactly what my mother did to us. She was completely broken-hearted when she lost Daddy, and that’s why she was so against you and I being together.”
“Yeah, well, as a parent, it’s my prerogative.”
“If you give them permission, they have nothing to hide from you. Doing things this way . . . it’ll make her rebellious and angry. She just lost her mother. Don’t keep her from living her life and enjoying her teenage years, too.”
“I’m trying to salvage her childhood, Melissa. God, don’t act like you know about this stuff. You have no idea what it’s like to be a parent.”
Melissa closed her eyes and held them closed for a long moment. “It’s true. I’m not a parent.” She stood and picked up her purse. “I’ll see you later.”
Melissa clumsily saw herself out and hobbled toward her car. She couldn’t get away from him fast enough. When she rounded her hood, she glanced around at the sound of her name.
Brian held his hand up as he approached. “Hold on.”
She stopped and turned to face him.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, fine.”
“I wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings.”
“Well, you’re right. I don’t know what it’s like to be a parent, but here is what I do know. We had to browbeat your daughter into talking to you about a problem she’s had for months. Wouldn’t you rather she feel comfortable being honest with you? Don’t you want your kids to be able to talk to you about anything? Would you rather they tell you what’s happening in their lives instead of hiding it because they’re afraid of your reaction?”
Brian stepped back, looking as if she’d slapped him. “Wow, what a way to make a guy feel like a lousy parent.”
Melissa deflated, all her indignation gone, because that wasn’t her intention. “I’m not telling you how to do your job, but when I have kids, they’ll want to talk to me, and I’m going to listen to every word they say.”
He frowned. “You planning on having babies with that guy, Melissa?”
“Yes, Brian, I plan on having kids with him.” She clicked the lock on her car door. “I gotta go.”
“Are you okay to drive with that boot on your foot?”
“I’m fine.”
“So does this mean I won’t see you again until the wedding?”
“I’ll see you at Christmas. I have gifts for the kids. Until then, I need to just . . .” She turned away from him.
“What, Lis?”
“I need to stay away from you for a while.”
“Why?”
“I just need to.” Melissa slipped into the driver’s seat and muttered, “Goodbye, Brian.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Brian watched her drive off before going back inside the house.
“Are you fighting?” Erin asked.
He pressed his lips together and shook his head, not sure how to answer. “We’re not fighting.”
“Good, because I really love her, and I don’t want you guys to hate each other again.”
“What?
“I don’t want you to go years without talking to her again—especially because of me.”
“I’m upset neither of you told me what was going on, but I appreciate her being there for you.”
> “Do you still love Melissa, Daddy?”
“Erin, what are you talking about?”
“You used to love her. Do you still?”
He dropped down on the couch. “I love your mom, babe.”
“You loved Melissa first. What about now?”
When he didn’t answer, Erin said, “I know mom kept you from marrying her.”
“Erin, where did you hear this crap? Did your mom talk to you about this? Did Melissa?” he asked when she shook her head.
“I know mom trapped you into marrying her by getting pregnant,” she muttered with a shrug.
“Erin—that is not true. Where are you getting this stuff?”
“I read it in Mom’s journals.”
He pointed to the stairs. “You read your mother’s journals—the ones in the closet?”
“Yes, a long time ago.”
Brian stood and stormed up the stairs, with Erin close on his heels.
“Dad, what are you doing?”
“Show me,” he said approaching the large walk-in closet. He pulled the door open and flipped on the light. It looked the same as she’d left it. Still full of her clothes, some strewed on the floor from her packing to leave him. He took a moment to get his bearings. It’d been months since he’d opened the doors to this closet. Forgetting he’d lost his beautiful wife was easier with the door closed. An open door was a constant reminder. Her clothes, jewelry, perfume, shoes, and that . . . he eyed the trunk directly in front of him, the trunk that held years and years of Julie’s stories and secrets.
He pulled out the large trunk holding her old diaries, dropped to his knees, and flipped the top open. It was crammed full of notebooks in all different colors and sizes. He also found a locked gun box. He picked up the box and grabbed the key taped to the lid of the trunk. He opened the case and looked at Julie’s little Ruger .380. He remembered buying it for her. He smiled, recalling the last time he’d tried to teach her how to shoot. She couldn’t hit a target two feet from her nose. She closed her eyes every time she pulled the trigger, cringing at the idea of firing a gun. He locked the box and replaced the key then looked down at the journals.
“Which one?” he asked, not turning around. When she didn’t answer he asked again. “Erin, which damn journal did you read?”