by Dana Mason
After changing her clothes, she took out the very thin, very short, and very black nightgown she’d brought and placed it in his top drawer. She grabbed a pen and a piece of notepaper and wrote, “Next time,” before placing the note on top of the nightgown in his drawer.
Before she left the room, she looked around for any signs of Julie, but there were none. Melissa wasn’t sure if that made her sad or happy. Julie had been her best friend, then her worst enemy, then her best friend again. Never once, while Melissa thought about them over the years, had she thought she would have Brian in her life like this again.
Is this a doomed relationship? Are we going against the tides by being together when we still should be mourning Julie? I do still mourn Julie. I miss her everyday but . . .
“What are you doing up here by yourself?” Brian asked, surprising her.
“I’m thinking about Julie.” She sat on the bed and looked around. “Is this wrong? Are we breaking the rules here, Brian?”
“Lis, you and I together could never be wrong.”
“Do you even miss her?”
“How can you ask me that?” He placed a hand to his chest and rubbed. “I spent every day of my life with her for seventeen years. Of course I miss her. I loved her. Do you think I’ve moved on without giving her another thought?”
She shrugged. “You don’t talk about her.”
“I don’t talk about her with you because I don’t want to hurt you. I talk about her every day with Erin and Cody. We talk about her all the time. It’s taken every ounce of self-preservation I have not to dig in that trunk and pull out her journals, just to understand—why him? Why would she leave me for him? Did she love him? Did he love her? Was she actually leaving for him or just leaving me? Did she know how much I loved her? I have to ask myself that question every day, Melissa.” Brian choked up. “Had I done something wrong? Had I hurt her like I hurt you and not realized it?”
“But, Brian, how could you have? Did you two fight? I don’t understand.”
“We hardly ever fought. We barely ever disagreed. That’s why those damn journals are so tempting, but I’m scared to find out that, while I’ve been walking around thinking myself a good husband, I was making her miserable. Why would she even look at another man if I made her happy? Clearly, I wasn’t doing my job.”
“Why haven’t you talked to me?” Melissa said, fighting with her own guilt over not being there for him through all this. “Why? If you’re having trouble with this, why haven’t you confided in me?”
“I don’t want to hurt you by throwing Julie in your face.”
“Brian . . . I want to be here for you fully. Don’t hide your feelings from me. That’s not healthy, and we don’t need to keep secrets from each other.” She took his hand as he sat next to her on the bed. “I have questions, too. Would Julie be okay with us? Would she want me in her house? Taking care of her kids?”
“The fact is, Melissa, her opinion stopped counting when she walked out of this house without even saying goodbye to her kids.”
“What?”
“The night she left to go be with him . . . she left without even hugging the kids. She packed a bag and left—then died.” He stood and paced in a small circle, scrubbing his face with his hands. “I stood right here in this spot and begged her not to go. I begged her to stay and talk to me.”
“I didn’t know that.” Melissa had to swallow back the burning in her throat. That made her sick to her stomach. “Why would she leave like that?”
“I don’t understand what was going on in her head, and maybe I never will, but when she did that, she gave up all say as to how her children are cared for and by who. I never walk out of this house without hugging them and saying, ‘I love you.’”
“That’s so sad. As if losing their mother wasn’t bad enough.”
“Tell me about it.” His breathing increased a little, and he raised his voice. “I’m sorry if I seem unconcerned with my dead wife, but the truth is, she made it easy for me.” He shook his head. “I would have never cheated on Julie, not after what I did to you. I learned from my own behavior, not to mention what Mark and Ali went through.” He came back and sat on the bed next to her. “If that wasn’t enough to keep her faithful, then why should I care if she wouldn’t like you and me together? She walked out without even having a conversation with me. Honestly—screw her! I love you, and she will not get in the way of us again. After seventeen years, she chose to give it up.” He took her hands. “I can’t fix things with Julie—it’s too late for that—but I can fix things with you. We have another chance.”
“You’re right. I know you’re right. I only want to do the right thing.”
“The right thing is right in front of your nose—and sitting downstairs waiting for us to watch a movie with them.” He smiled and Melissa felt much more at ease.
“Brian . . . you shouldn’t read those journals. It’ll bring up things you can’t resolve. They were Julie’s thoughts and not meant for anyone to read.”
“That’s why I haven’t. I guess I should burn them.”
“Maybe you should.” She smiled. “Let’s go watch movies and eat pizza in our fort.”
Chapter Forty-One
Melissa took several pictures when they crawled into the fort together. She wanted to give them new memories and snapshots for the mantle, not to replace Julie’s pictures, but to add to them. She got shots of Brian with pizza sauce on his face and Erin with a mouthful of food. Erin tried to hide from every shot. Melissa wanted to explain it away as a teenager thing, but she thought there was more to it than that. She couldn’t believe how tired Erin looked, and withdrawn. She was tense and stressed about something. Melissa tried to ask her about it, but Erin wouldn’t talk with Brian and Cody nearby.
When they lay down to watch the first movie, Melissa curled next to Brian on top of the blankets and linked her fingers with his, enjoying having his arms around her. Security was a new feeling to her. Even with Chase, she’d never felt this comfortable. He never made her feel like she could say anything to him either. Brian didn’t judge her or try to make her into something she wasn’t. Chase was always so proper and reserved; he’d never do something like build her a fort.
Within fifteen minutes, Erin had fallen asleep. Melissa leaned over and stared at her face for a few minutes, wishing she could read the girl’s mind. Then she gave Brian an inquisitive look.
“I told you she wasn’t herself,” he said. “She’s a wreck, but she won’t talk to me. I was hoping she’d talk to you.”
“Do you think Frank Jeffries is bothering her again?”
Brian raised his brow. “He better not be. She promised she’d tell me. I thought maybe it had something to do with Matty.”
“I’ll try tomorrow,” she said.
Brian nodded toward the TV. “Will the light from the TV bother you? I can turn it off,” he whispered.
“No, I don’t mind,” she said, turning into him, wrapping her arms around him and tucking her head in his chest to go to sleep.
Brian lifted her chin to kiss her. “Good night, cupcake. I love you.”
“I love you, too,” she muttered before dozing off.
Melissa woke up sometime during the night with the TV flashing and Brian’s arms tight around her. She started to snuggle closer to him when she heard a sniffle. She slowly turned toward Erin who had the blankets over her head. The mound of blankets moved up and down with Erin’s sobs.
Melissa wrestled herself out of Brian’s arms and rolled over to Erin. She pulled the blanket and looked into Erin’s tightly closed eyes.
“What’s the matter, babe?” Melissa asked, wiping tears from Erin’s cheeks.
Erin shook her head and covered her face with her hands.
“Come here, sweetheart.” Melissa wrapped her arms around Erin and let her cry herself to sleep. When Erin had fallen asleep, Melissa brushed the hair off her face and looked at her sunken cheeks and pale skin. She also noticed the yel
lowing on her cheek. Her eyes then narrowed in on a small cut along her hairline.
What is going on with her? She leaned in and kissed Erin’s forehead. When she felt Brian wrap his arms around them both, she turned slightly to look at him.
“Everything okay?” he asked in a husky voice.
“I don’t know,” she said and nodded to Erin’s face.
Brian lifted up on his knees and looked down at Erin. Melissa pointed to the faint bruising and the cut.
“What the hell?” He reached in and laid a hand on Erin’s shoulders, but Melissa shook him off. “I’m waking her up. She needs to tell us what’s going on.”
“She’s exhausted, Brian. We can talk to her in the morning.”
Cody shifted and rolled over when their hushed conversation got louder. Brian looked from Erin to Cody before laying back down, wrapping Melissa and Erin within his embrace.
When Melissa woke, she was in the fort alone. She heard rustling outside, but didn’t know who it was. She crawled out just in time. As she stood, half the fort collapsed at her feet. Brian’s barking laughter startled her.
She looked over at him and frowned. “I broke it.”
Brian slipped his coat off his shoulders. “That’s okay. We’re done with it.”
“Where did you go?” she asked as he wrapped his cold body around hers.
“I had to drop Cody off. Austin’s mom is taking Jamie and Cody with them to the circus.” He kissed her and mumbled, “I also picked up some breakfast—well, doughnuts. I wouldn’t exactly call that breakfast.”
“Oh, yummy. Doughnuts sound good. Did you get chocolate?”
Pounding footsteps and Erin shouting traveled down the stairs. Melissa’s heart nearly pounded out of her chest at the sound of Erin’s voice. When Erin bounced off the bottom step, the doorbell rang. She ran into the room, her face stark white and her eyes wide.
“What is wrong with you?” Brian said.
“I’m sorry, Daddy!” she blurted out as tears dropped down her face.
“Sorry about what.” The doorbell rang again. “Hold on,” he said, pointing a finger at her.
Erin whipped around to face Melissa. “I need to tell you . . .” she tried to say through her sobs.
“What the hell is going on?” Melissa tried to lead her over to the couch, but Erin turned once the door was open, her back going straight and her shoulders stiffening. Johnny and Detective Martinez stood at the door, both wearing their badges in plain sight.
“Morning, boys” Brian said. “Come in. How was the honeymoon?”
Johnny didn’t smile. His expression was pure business. “We need to ask you a few questions, Brian.”
“What’s going on?” Brian said, the smile dropping from his face.
Melissa’s stomach sank as she took in their grim expressions. She bent over, picking up blankets, clearing the room for the men to enter the house.
Before they had a chance to answer Brian’s question, Matty walked up the path behind them.
“Who the hell else is going to show up here this morning?” Brian waved a hand toward him. Matty’s eyes darted from face to face until they landed on Erin’s. He frowned and said, “Sorry, but I need to talk to you, Mr. Hammel.”
“It looks like you’re going to have to wait in line.”
“We need to question you about the Jeffries shooting,” Detective Martinez said.
“What?” Melissa and Brian said at the same time. She dropped the blankets and stepped up to the door next to Brian.
Matty held out the folded newspaper he was holding. Brian snatched it out of his hand and unfolded it before reading the headline.
“POPULAR TEACHER SHOT IN HIGH SCHOOL LOCKER ROOM.”
“Someone tried to kill Frank Jeffries on Friday night, and we need to ask where you were between six and eight that evening.”
“He was with me,” Melissa said.
He held his hands out, gesturing toward them. “So this is an official visit.”
Johnny glanced from Brian to Melissa then back to Brian. “Were you out with Melissa on Friday evening?”
“We were at my apartment,” she said.
Brian held his finger up to hush her. “Wait a minute, Lis. Don’t talk to them.”
“Your gun was found at the scene, Brian.”
“No. My gun is upstairs . . . locked in my gun safe.”
“How many guns do you own?” Johnny asked.
“They’re all locked up—”
“Brian was with me all Friday night,” Melissa interrupted.
Brian tilted to look at her. “Stop talking.” He turned back at Johnny. “So, what’s the deal?”
“We found a Rugar .380 in the locker room where Jeffries was shot. It’s registered to you,” Johnny said.
“A Rugar?” Brian bowed his head for a moment, and Melissa was waiting for him to tell them no, to laugh at them. Just like she wanted to laugh at them—ridiculous! Crazy—it was crazy that her new brother-in-law was here to question Brian about a crime that happened when Brian had been with her.
“Brian, I’m sorry, but we need you to come down for questioning.” When Johnny said this, Brian nodded, pursing his lips.
“No! No!” Melissa stepped between them and shook her head adamantly. “No, Johnny, no!” They all turned when a car door slammed. Within a few seconds, Ali was pushing past Johnny and Detective Martinez. As her eyes drifted over the scene, she said, “What the hell is going on, Johnny?”
“They’re arresting Brian,” Melissa said. “Johnny came here to arrest him.”
“Melissa,” Johnny said, “I’m not arresting Brian. We need to question him, that’s all. If he didn’t do anything wrong then he’ll be home in a few hours.” Johnny looked at Ali and nodded to Melissa’s car on the street. “I called when I saw Melissa’s car out front. I thought you’d want to be here.”
“Let’s get this over with,” Brian said.
“Ali, he didn’t . . . he couldn’t have. He was with me the entire time. You have to stop them.”
“Melissa,” Brian shouted.
She jumped at the ring of her name and looked into his eyes.
“Stop—stop this. I have to go in. I need you to calm down and take Erin over to Mark’s. He’s starting a big job tomorrow, so he should be in his office today. Take Erin over there right now.”
“Daddy, no!” Erin shouted.
“Erin, come here, babe,” Brian said, nodding her over. “I want to talk to you.” He looked at Johnny. “Give me a minute.”
Johnny nodded, stepping back outside with Martinez.
Brian looked at Melissa, who still had one hand gripped around his arm. “Melissa, give me a second with Erin.”
“Brian . . .”
“Please, Melissa.”
When she stepped back, Erin wrapped her arms around Brian’s waist and lifted on her tiptoes. Her body heaved from her sobs until Brian’s whispers calmed her down. She nodded a few times then pulled back and looked into Brian’s face.
“Do you understand?” Brian said, his voice firm, not comforting like Melissa had expected. Erin nodded and stepped back, wiping her face.
Brian backed away from Erin and looked at Melissa. The expression in his eyes and the bright green color caught her off guard. She started shaking her head when he nodded for her to come closer. “Why are you doing this? We have proof. Why won’t you let me—”
“Melissa, this is just for questioning.”
She laid her palm down on his chest. “I don’t believe you. Your eyes say something different.”
“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he said. “But I need you to listen to me, okay?”
She held her breath and fought with everything she had to not freak out.
“Don’t talk to your sister about Friday night. I’ll take care of this, but I need you to trust me.”
“No, I won’t lie.”
“Honey, I’m not asking you to lie. I’m asking you to keep your mouth shut until I figure thi
s out.” He bowed his head and kissed the top of hers. “Take care of the kids until I can get home. Erin needs you.”
She popped her head up to look into his eyes. “You haven’t done anything wrong.”
“I’ve done a lot wrong, Lis.”
“We can clear this up. I’ll give a statement.”
“I need you to concentrate on Erin and stay strong for her.”
“Brian—”
“That’s all I ask, Melissa. Please just trust me and do this for me.”
“Of course . . .” She nodded. “You already know I’ll be here for her.” She wished like hell she could read his thoughts.
His eyes grew wet. “Don’t forget how much I love you. I’m sorry for screwing things up again.”
Ali placed her hand around Melissa’s upper arm and squeezed. “The sooner they get him to the station, the sooner he can come home.”
“Ali, he didn’t do this. You believe that don’t you?”
“Yes—”
“Melissa.” Brian cleared his throat. “Take Erin to Mark’s, okay? Do it now.”
Melissa nodded and released him to turn toward Erin, who was now being calmed by Matt.
Ali said, “Brian, you need a lawyer, not Mark.”
“Mark will take care of it, Ali. Just let her go,” Brian said as he stepped outside to follow Johnny and Martinez.
Matt held Erin close as she sobbed. Watching your father being hauled away by the police was awful for a child. What the hell was Johnny thinking? Why not give us some warning?
Melissa felt shell-shocked. How had this happened? She woke up feeling like they had conquered the world, and now their world had been turned upside down. But why?
“Erin, let’s go,” Melissa said. “We need to do what he says. I don’t understand why, but he wants you to go see Uncle Mark.”
Erin nodded and looked up at Matt with the most pleading expression. They stared at each other for a minute before Matt said, “I know. It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not,” she said, her eyes pleading with him.