by Ivy Fox
The days we are recessed from the trial seem to extend our torture, and everyone in this house is feeling Rome’s absence. I catch Henrietta crying over the stove every time I go into the kitchen, Lawrence is more snippy than usual, and the typically shy Carmen is even less talkative, almost rendering her a complete mute whenever Rome’s name is mentioned.
Everyone is hurting, while all I can do is watch and feel powerless to lessen their grief.
My sister is right—I can’t fill Rome’s shoes. No one can. It took this shit happening to see how he has always been the glue that kept our family together. I always thought that losing Ollie would be the worst thing that could happen to me, but losing Rome this way, is just as devastating.
“You can’t sleep either?” Snow whispers, slicing through the night’s silence and revealing she’s just as awake as I am.
“My thoughts are too loud for me to sleep,” I admit. And maybe my guilty conscience—of my inability to help my family—has something to do with it as well.
“Mine are pretty deafening, too,” she confesses as I turn over to my side, at the same time she sways my way.
“I’ll never be him, Snow,” I profess saddened, feeling less than.
“I know that.” She smiles meekly, placing her hand over my drumming heart.
“That scares me. What if I’ll never be enough? For Elle. For Ollie. For you. What if I’m not enough?”
She grabs my scruffy cheeks in her warm palms and presses a gentle kiss on my lips.
“I don’t need you to be Rome, Ash. None of us do. We all need you to just be you. I just need you to be the boy I fell in love with. Nothing more, nothing less.”
“I don’t think I know who that is anymore,” I choke out, revealing my vulnerable underbelly.
“Then lucky for you that I do.” She grins brightly, warming my cold heart. “And I’ll make sure to spend my life making you remember what an extraordinary man you are,” she says sweetly, but my heart is too broken to let her thoughtful words mend its jagged edges.
Her gray eyes pierce through me, as she holds my face in her hands more forcefully.
“Ash, I need you to listen to me. You give yourself too little credit. Just look at all you’ve been able to accomplish since Rome was taken away from us. You stepped up and started dealing with the Grayson Foundation and all its demands, all the while making sure the Coens do their job in clearing Rome’s name. You’re taking care of this family, Ash. You. A guy that, at one point in his life, would have run away from such a challenge. Don’t sell yourself short. Because I never will. I’m so proud of you, Asher. I’ve never been more proud of anyone in my life.”
“Come here,” I growl, wanting to have her as close as I can, desperate to hang on to these few, precious moments where all that exists is hope instead of despair.
She climbs on top of me, leaning her body down to kiss me. I grab the back of her neck and keep her mouth on mine, tasting the richness of her love. I know I don’t deserve even a speck of it, but by God, I will work to earn it as best I can.
I break away from our ardent kiss, loving how her body naturally molds itself to mine. She places her chin on my chest, as I play with the white locks draped across her naked back. As much as I would love to spend the next few minutes just getting lost in her clear, gray eyes, the ache in my chest won’t allow me that reprieve. Not until I say what I should have said months ago.
“Snow.” I stifle in my breath, hating that I’ll probably ruin her restful glow with my next words. “I need to say something. And before you have the urge to interrupt me, I need you to just give this to me. Just let me say what I need to, okay?”
She gives me a cute little nod, making my shame increase tenfold.
“I know we haven’t talked about it yet, but I don’t want the mistakes I made in my past to mess with our future. You get that, don’t you?”
She gives me another tender tilt of the head and places a gentle kiss over my heart, which will always beat to her song for all of its days.
“That night at the beach,” I start saying, but Snow’s head lifts instantly, her lips already prepared to spill her forgiving words. However, I snap those luscious lips shut with my forefinger before she’s able to utter a word. “Don’t, Snow. You can’t give me forgiveness when I haven’t even asked for it. Let me do this.”
Her lips thin, but she doesn’t make a move to interrupt me.
“I shouldn’t have acted the way I did with you. It was immature and cruel. I should have come to you and asked you directly what the deal was with your mother, before lashing out at you without justification. It wasn’t right, and it wasn’t fair.”
“No, it wasn’t,” she interjects, making me feel all the more shitty for it.
“I swear to you, that night killed something in me, too. It made me afraid of the monster that lived inside of me, ready to hurt you without a second thought. I know you’ve already heard the shit all of us lived through, just by having this stupid last name, but even so, it doesn’t justify what I did. And even though no apologies will ever cut it, nor loving words will ever erase that night from our lives, I want you to know that I will strive to shower you with happiness, making the memory of that night just a blip in our history.”
“You hurt me,” she admits, her face showcasing just a smidge of the pain I must have caused her.
“I know I did,” I stutter, feeling all the suffering I created that night strangle my heart into a pulp.
Fuck.
“I swear to you. I will never hurt you again. On my life, Snow. Never,” I frantically promise, wondering if this wound is still so raw that picking at its scab was the worst thing I could have done right now. “Shit, Snow.” I falter with my own emotions coming to the forefront—panic, love, all of it in a ball of worry—and frightened that I might lose her again.
She places her palms over my chest and straightens her spine in a way that has me craning my neck up to look at her glorious, naked body. A few strands of her long hair cover her voluptuous breasts, concealing them, but the remaining of her glowing, bare skin is just within reach. My hands itch to touch her, but I keep them frozen still at my side, letting her be the one to take the lead.
Her eyes continue to scrutinize me, and I wonder if she sees my heart bleeding for her forgiveness; or if she hears how it always calls out to her, even when it feels unworthy. Her glorious face is stern as she takes me in, and for a brief moment, I believe her next words will tear me apart, as she tells me that my wrongdoings are unforgivable, even for someone as pure and selfless as she is.
“You did hurt me, Ash. I came to you vulnerable and afraid, and you went out of your way to break me,” she commences, only increasing my fear. I feel her hands lift from my chest and trail along my abdomen, creating shivers to spring free all through my body in their wake, when she says, “A lot has changed since then, though. I understand why you did it, even if I wish you would have come to me before doing something so vile, so cruel.”
“Me, too,” I murmur defeated, but then silence any further words when her brows rise, telling me I’ve had my moment, so this one is all hers.
“Our lives are so screwed up right now, Ash. It’s ugly chaos, threatening to take away any happiness I have in it. But I can’t allow that. You and Ollie make me happy. You both always have. And now I have Rome, too. He was there for me when things got so blurry that the three of us lost sight of what we had. It wasn’t only you and Ollie that couldn’t deal with the repercussions of our actions. I’m at fault, too. We are all to blame for not having the courage to fight harder for us,” she explains, one errant finger still trickling up and down my body, making it sing for her.
“When I fell in love with you and Ollie, you both gave me hope. You both restored my faith in believing I could have the unconditional love that I had been denied for most of my life. Your love offered me a beautiful dream, while Rome’s love was born from the remnants of a nightmare
. Our struggle to confront our demons was what kindled it to grow, while yours was born out of pure innocence. But now I don’t want a wishful fantasy, and I don’t want to be trapped in the hellish nightmare that passed. I want something real—everlasting. Are you going to give that to me, Ash? Or are you going to continue to wallow in the past, so much so, you can’t even see the future that is within our grasp?”
I swallow dryly, my heart beating a mile a minute, as she continues to ravish my body with her gentle caress, while my shattered heart is sprung forth with hope from her endearing words.
“What’s it going to be, Ash? Are you going to give me what I want? What I need?”
“Yes,” I vow with every fiber in my being.
I watch on bated breath as one of her hands trail behind her back, and I feel her velvet touch tease my already stiff cock.
“Are you going to respect me, talk to me, should something unsavory ever cross your mind again?” she demands, her hand now fully grasping me in a tight hold.
“Yes,” I choke out, my voice beginning to tremble with her forbidden touch.
“Will you always tell me the truth, even when you think I can’t handle it? Be faithful to me, no matter who tries to break us apart?”
“Fuck, yes!”
A trace of a snicker begins to tug at her lips, and it takes all my willpower not to put my eager hands on her. But this is her show, and right now, it’s one I don’t want to miss a second of. That little mischievous grin of hers blossoms further when she lifts her ass just enough to sink and swallow my engorged cock inside her already slick core.
“FUCK!” I cry out, still unprepared for all the sensations my body feels when she’s owning me in such a way.
Her eyes shutter to half-mast while she begins to lift and fall on me ever so torturously, making me hurt as well as crave everything she wants to bestow on me.
“Will you love me, Ash? Can you promise me that your heart is mine and no one else’s?” The small trace of vulnerability in that question shatters me into small pieces.
My hands finally meet her skin, grabbing onto her hips so I can love her with my body as well as with my whole heart. I then candidly reply, “I promise, Snow. I’m yours. I’ve always been fucking yours.” Her meek smile returns to her, making me want to turn its light into a blistering sun.
“Show me,” she whimpers, and that’s all I need to hear to take over and do as she commands.
My fingers dig into her skin as I thrust myself repeatedly into her hot core, loving how it clenches on my hard length, as if it doesn’t want my cock to ever escape its rightful home. Her head falls back, revealing her breasts completely, making it painful not to have her puckered nipples between my teeth. Unable to resist, I lift myself from the bed, my mouth immediately latching on to one of the diamond studs.
“Ahh,” she cries out, grabbing my head with one hand to keep my teasing mouth exactly where it is, while the other carves at my back with her desire, her nails sinking into my skin as she continues to ride me as if it’s her mission in life.
Fuck, how I wish it were. Because making love to Snow has become my favorite pastime. It’s when our two bodies align that our hearts link together, whispering their promises and vows of how they belong to each other and always will.
I release her nipple from my teeth with a loud pop, only to suck its counterpart with the same care and devotion. Our rhythm is frantic and uncoordinated, but damn it, if it isn’t the most beautiful dance two bodies can make. The soft moans that leave her lips become the melody playing in the background, commanding us to keep our maddening tempo, as we surge and rise to reach that high note we both aspire to grab hold of.
“I love you so fucking much,” I wail as I release her breast to cradle my face into her neck. When her wet pussy chokes my cock at my declaration of love, I swear I go blind with its beauty.
“I love you, too, Ash. So, so much,” she cries out, fucking me harder than I’m able to bear without coming undone.
“Shit, baby, you’re gonna make me cum,” I grunt, sinking my teeth into her shoulder, thinking of dead presidents to keep me from tumbling over.
“I’m so close,” she moans. “You feel so good, Ash.”
Fuck, this woman!
“You’re killing me, Snow,” I roar, feeling my cock waving the white flag, ready to explode its sweet surrender inside her.
“Ash,” she moans yet again, her legs tightly wrapped around me, pulling me to give her what she wants.
I lick the glistening sweat dripping down her neck, savoring her sweetness, as my hand travels south to find the little button that will have her detonating in my arms. When my expert fingers begin to play with its favorite instrument, she releases a deafening high-pitched moan.
“Ash!” she yells out, seconds from reaching her peak.
“Cum, baby. Let me feel you cum as we ride into oblivion.”
And like the good girl she is, my love shatters around my cock, milking my orgasm out of me. Once I’ve filled her with every last drop of me, I feel the silly smile blooming on my face, one that can probably be seen from outer space.
We fall back on the bed, our breathing frantic and blissful. I don’t believe much in the notion of heaven or hell, but if there ever was a paradise, then this must be what mine looks like—my girl wrapped around me, our limbs entangled with each other’s, enjoying the afterglow of our lovemaking.
“You guys can’t let a man sleep, can you?” Ollie mumbles next to us, wiping the sleep away from his eyes.
“We have a lot of catching up to do, Ollie. Sleeping is for the weak,” I taunt, feeling like a man who has been given a crown with Snow’s love confession. I kiss her cute button nose, her wide, satisfied smile being the confirmation I need to know that she’s okay with losing sleep if fucking our brains out is on the menu.
“Cocky bastard,” my brother teases back, his smile cresting over his lips. “Go and take a shower, asshole,” he orders, and then proceeds to pull Snow off my chest and onto her back, clearly showing me that he also wants to take care of our girl.
I place a quick peck on Snow’s lips, lifting off the bed so Ollie can have his fill. I don’t think that will ever happen, though. We can live thousands of years and never be truly satisfied.
Before I have even reached the bathroom door, my girl’s pants and mewls are already flooding the room. I turn to watch them and see Ollie’s face in between Snow’s folds, eating her out as if it was oxygen to his lungs.
Fucker had to one-up me with foreplay. Good for him. If we keep at this rate, we run the risk of having a very spoiled woman on our hands. Not that I care. Snow deserves to be pampered and taken care of. Lord knows she’s gone without love and affection for most of her life.
So has Rome.
Shit.
The image of my brother in some prison cell, away from his woman and us, doesn’t sit well with me. While we’re here—able to take in her love—he’s on the outside, never really capable of feeling its true force.
I need to get my brother out of this mess. There must be something we can do to turn the tide. Our fucking lawyers are adamant that all the prosecution has is circumstantial evidence at best. But I see how those twelve jurors look at my brother. I see how their eyes turn blank and scornful when they appraise him. They think he did it, and worst of all, they think my father was a fucking saint whose life was cut short because of an ungrateful son who only saw dollar bills.
I need to do something before Snow does.
I see how she’s wavering. Day by day, I see how watching my brother come in and out of that courtroom in handcuffs is killing her inside. I need to think of something fast before she does the unthinkable and takes Rome’s place.
If I let that happen, he will never forgive me.
And I’ll never forgive myself.
“All rise,” says the familiar bailiff, announcing the start of this fucking witch trial. I take Snow’s trembling
hand in mine as she looks over to a black-eyed Rome—sporting the brand-new shiner to contrast with the yellow one that was just starting to heal.
The fuck is going on in that prison?
If I didn’t know any better, I would assume that Rome’s transfer to Rikers was due to logistics rather than a strategic one. But knowing the powerful people involved, I’m sure this is just another move orchestrated by the justice system to make him break. Maybe in the judge’s mind, putting Rome there could possibly tempt him to make a deal and confess in exchange for being transferred to a minimum-security prison. It sure would make her job easier to wrap this trial sooner with his admission of guilt.
But what Judge Katz and the DA don’t know is that he has bigger fears than being locked up like a wild animal. His only concern is for Snow, and he needs to give her the illusion that he might get out of this unscathed. But as I take in my brother’s eyes, I think he’s losing his hope. As days go by, he looks as if he’s finally come to terms with his decision—and fate.
“Mr. Rosenblum, you may call your first witness,” Judge Katz announces, ready to start with today’s torment.
“Thank you, Your Honor. The prosecution would like to call Claire Hurst to the stand.”
“Objection, Your Honor,” Joel Coen blares out, obviously taken aback—as much as I am—by the name of this witness. “Mrs. Hurst is not mentioned in the witness list provided by the prosecution, Your Honor. The defense cannot cross-examine a witness when we haven’t had time to do our due diligence on her testimony.”
The curl of triumph in Rosenblum’s lips sets me on edge.
“Your Honor, as we said when we began putting this case together, we have an undisclosed witness we would only announce after she was able to make her testimony without fear of persecution. The defense doesn’t have to cross-examine today, Your Honor, and can postpone for a time they feel they are ready to call on her again.”