by Raven Steele
“But that’s impossible. You told me the Deific has been around for hundreds of years. If he’s the founder, then he must be extremely old.” I shook my head, trying to understand. “He would be too old unless—” My head snapped up, and I stared at Charlie in disbelief.
He was shaking his head. “You weren’t supposed to find out like this. He wanted to be the one to tell you.”
A vampire. “How is it possible that a vampire could start something that does this much good in the world?”
“How is it impossible? Didn’t you say that a vampire once helped you? And you’ve met Samira. She radiates goodness.”
I hesitated, thinking of Samira and of the vampire with the sorrow-filled eyes. He had helped me and not just by saving me from Alarica. Somehow he transferred light into me when we touched, and it spotlighted all of the terrible things I’d done. I’m not sure I would’ve questioned Boaz had I not met the vampire in the park.
“We are all free to choose,” Charlie said.
I opened my mouth to speak, but he held up his hand and stood. “You can ask Henry your questions when you meet him. He’s much better at explaining all of this than I am. Until then, you can stay in an apartment upstairs until you find your own place to live. Sarah will show you the way.”
I followed him to the door. “And what do I do with myself in the meantime?”
“Tomorrow, Sarah will have you meet with one of our specialists to help you better understand your gift. It’s important that you learn to use magic the right way.”
“I will do this, but I want one thing in return.”
“Name it,” he said, his hand resting high on the door jam.
“I want your help finding someone.”
“Who?”
I took a deep breath, and on my exhale said, “The vampire who saved me from Alarica.”
Chapter 33
When Charlie didn’t say anything, I asked it again. “Please. I need to find him.”
“Why is he so important to you?”
“I’m not sure, but I felt something with him, a connection somehow. I know that sounds weird, but for some reason, I feel it’s important to find him.”
“Then we will help. I’ll speak to Henry about giving you access to our private database.”
I thanked him and gave him another hug. Sarah was waiting outside to escort me upstairs.
“So, what do you think?” she asked, after walking me through the three-bedroom apartment. “It’s not super chic and could use some major updating, starting with getting rid of this tan carpet, but at least it’s clean. That’s more than you can say for a lot of other apartments in the city.”
“I think it’s perfect.”
“Great, and since you’re out of town, I’d love to take you out some time and show you the city.”
“I’d like that. Truly.”
“Awesome!” She turned toward the door. “I’ll let you get settled in. Let me know if you need anything.”
I woke early the next morning feeling better than I had in a long time. I actually looked forward to being around others and learning more about the Deific and myself.
In the closet, I found a note from Charlie that read, “I hope these clothes fit and are to your liking. Sarah picked them out.”
I smiled. Charlie hadn’t lost his touch when it came to knowing what I needed.
I dressed quickly in black slacks and a long sleeved, white blouse. I pulled my hair back into a loose ponytail, applied a little makeup, and called it good. Downstairs, the Deific hummed with production. It was barely past eight.
“Good morning, Eve. Did you sleep well?” Sarah asked. Her eyes twinkled, and she leaned forward, resting her elbows on the desk.
“I did, thanks. And thank you for the clothes. You have amazing taste!”
She clapped her hands together. “Yay! I’m so glad they worked out. I was nervous I’d screw it up since I’d never met you before, but Charlie knew your body measurements perfect.” Her eyes widened, and her smile disappeared. “Not in a creepy way.”
I laughed, a real honest to goodness laugh and it felt good. “I know what you mean.”
“Phew.” She wiped imaginary sweat from her brow. “The Deific prides itself on being a sexual harassment free workplace.” She leaned toward me and whispered, “But between you and me, sometimes the hottest guys come in here to get their taxes done, and I’m like, I need to become an accountant!”
I laughed again. The clients she was talking about were probably supernaturals. They tended to exude sexual energy, a quality they couldn’t turn off.
Sarah fanned herself with her hand, then pointed down the hall. “Charlie’s here. You can go back and see him. Same room as yesterday. I’m going to go take a cold shower.”
“Thanks.” I left her grinning, my chest light. Is this what it felt like to have a normal life? No scheming talk, no lies or manipulations. Just real, honest people.
I made my way through the cubicles, having to turn around a few times, until I finally found Charlie’s office.
“Come in,” he said when I neared the doorway. He closed the laptop in front of him and leaned back in the chair behind his desk. The lines between his eyebrows were etched deeper than yesterday, and his mouth stretched tight. “How are you today?”
“Better than you by the looks of it. You okay?”
“Nothing you need to worry about. Today I want you focusing solely on your training with Dr. Skinner.”
“Who’s that?”
“One of the most remarkable men you’ll ever meet. He has an insight on life that will change a person, if they’re open to it.”
I opened the door to Dr. Skinner’s office. A balding, heavy-set man greeted me. “You must be Eve.”
He stood and walked around his desk to shake my hand. He was barely taller than me, with brown hair tousled on top of his head in curly waves. When I took hold of his palm, I glanced into his steady, brown eyes and felt at ease.
“It’s nice to meet you,” I said.
“Oh, no, the pleasure is all mine. Have a seat.”
I settled into a chair and looked around. Except for a giant framed photo hanging on the wall behind his desk and a vase of roses, the room was devoid of personal belongings. The picture was a black and white photo of a young girl whose eyes seemed too narrow for her face. She had dark hair pulled into thick pigtails and was smiling cheerfully. But the smile didn’t come from her small upturned lips—it was in her eyes.
“I know you just got here yesterday, but have you had a chance to visit with Charlie much? I know you two are close.” He lowered himself back into his seat.
My gaze dropped to the floor. “It feels strange to say that we are close when we've only seen each other a couple of times, yet I still consider him my closest friend.”
"Letters will do that. They can be extremely personal."
"You know about the letters?" I asked.
"I was the one who suggested he write to you. I figured it would be a good outlet for him, while also giving you a way to still connect to this world." He leaned back, his expression thoughtful. “I hope you know he expects nothing from you. Charlie spoke of you often while you were away, wondering how you were doing. He really cares about you.”
I remained still in guilty silence.
“Do you want anything to drink?” he asked.
“No thank you, but I would like to begin. I was hoping to visit with Charlie more. Something was bothering him when I saw him earlier, and I want to see if I can help.”
Dr. Skinner nodded slowly. “The last several years have been rough for Charlie. I just hope one day he can let the past go so he can live life again.”
“Does it have to do with his wife?”
“That’s his story to tell, which I’m sure he’ll share with you when he’s ready.” Dr. Skinner opened a drawer and removed a gray folder. “I’ve looked over your file, and I must say, you’ve led a very difficult life.”
My
lips tightened. “It’s in the past. Can we talk about something else?”
He observed me carefully, then said, “I understand you are different from most witches in the sense that it is your emotions that give you the ability to use magic, correct?”
“I wouldn’t say all of my emotions. Mainly it’s just pride, hate, anger and fear.”
“Why just those?”
I shrugged. “I’m not sure. It’s just what my parents taught me.”
He leaned forward, elbows on top of his desk. “Have you ever felt love?”
Boaz. My insides twisted, and I tightened my fists. “I don't think so, not real love anyway.”
“Have you ever felt happy?”
“When I was a child, I had a nanny that was like a mother to me. I was happy with her.”
“Good. We can expand on that later. How about peace?”
I thought for a moment. “I don’t think so. I’ve felt indifferent, but I don’t think that’s the same thing.”
“It’s not. Have you ever felt compassion?”
The vampire with the sorrow-filled eyes immediately came to mind, and I nodded. "That's what originally kept me from wanting to be like my parents, and it's what ultimately saved me when I went too far.”
He nodded in approval. “And how about beauty? Have you ever felt beauty?”
I shrugged, not understanding the question. “I’ve seen beautiful things.”
“But have you felt it?”
“Is that possible?”
“For you, yes, but for most normal humans, they can only appreciate and love beauty.” He reached over to the vase and withdrew a long-stemmed rose. “Look at this rose and tell me what you see.”
I eyed it carefully. It was a red rose in full bloom with a sweet smelling aroma. “It’s beautiful, but it looks like every other rose I’ve ever seen.”
“Look closer.”
I focused harder, this time noticing the many lines that ran in an intricate pattern across its velvet skin.
“Keep looking,” I heard his voice say in an eager tone.
I sucked in a deep breath, inhaling its fragrance. The air swirled around the rose in a circular pattern, and I froze, unsure if I’d imagined the strange movement. I stared harder, going deeper beyond the layers, until I barely noticed the room fading away around me.
It was the delicate veins of the rose traveling to an unknown destination that held my attention. Then, as if they had been doing it the whole time, the lines physically moved, following some predestined path. The visible ambrosial aroma twirled again in a rhythmic pattern, round and round, as if it were dancing to an unheard symphony.
I tilted my head ever so slightly, attempting to hear the enchanting music that seemed to be making the rose come to life. The sound was a faint whisper like the gentle humming of a busy bee on a warm summer day. I remained still. The patterns continued to move until I could no longer distinguish one line from another.
The entire rose stirred in a constant fluid motion, yet I could still see each individual petal. The gentle humming soon separated into a thousand voices of a great chorus, but they were soft and reverent as if they sang in humble praise to something beyond my comprehension. The harmonious song, combined with the swaying aroma, which had wrapped itself around me in a tender embrace, brought tears to my eyes.
“Eve?” a distant voice asked.
The room came into focus, and I wiped at my eyes. “What was that?”
Dr. Skinner smiled and said, “That was beauty in its purest form. As you just witnessed, beauty is an action. It will continue to create the grandeur of this rose until its life span ends. But just like everything else in this world, beauty has an opposite. Ugliness. It, too, is an action and creates its object to be loathsome and dark, with intentions to serve its own selfish desires. In a similar manner, these two opposites also affect humans.”
He took the rose from me and turned it over in his hand. “A rose has no choice but to be beautiful, but a human has been given the ability to choose whether to be ugly or beautiful. Their actions make them so. I’m not talking about physical appearance. I’m speaking about the kind of beauty that inspires love or the ugliness that wishes to harm.”
“You would not desire power if you felt love. It simply cannot exist in the light of purity and truth. It belongs with its dark brothers: envy, anger, jealousy. Your parents understood this very well and were very careful to ensure that light stayed out of your life. But I want to stress to you that the positive emotions of love, peace, compassion, and joy are just as powerful as their counterparts, and when these emotions are turned outward, you’ll be able to use magic in ways you never thought possible.
“To truly change, a person must first start with their inner self. They must learn to forgive themselves of their own inadequacies and realize their own nothingness before they can ever truly become great.”
“I have to realize that I am nothing in order to help others?” I asked.
He smiled kindly. “Of course not. What I mean by one’s nothingness is when a person recognizes their many faults and their inability to rid themselves of those faults, then they become humble. They strip themselves of all pride. When this happens, a person stops thinking about themselves altogether, and their thoughts and concerns turn to others. In this manner, they lose themselves. This is when true power comes. But this is a long way off. We must first teach you to seek out beauty and experience joy so that you can use your powers properly.”
“Is it addictive?”
He chuckled. “It’s unquenchable. Love continually grows. It starts first with self but then includes family, friends, neighbors, until nothing is wanted more than to save the entire world. So yes, it can be addictive, but in a remarkable way.”
“Will you teach me?”
He shook his head. “I wish I was great enough to teach you how to love, but I am highly inadequate. Only pure innocence can teach you what you need to know.” He removed a sheet of paper from the gray folder and handed it to me. “I’ve arranged for you to work at a nearby school called “The Academy” starting tomorrow. The students there will teach you more about happiness and unconditional love than I ever can.”
Written on the paper was an address and a description of the school.
“Are you sure about this? I've never been around children before."
He leaned back in his seat. “They will love you. These children don’t know how to do anything else. You’ll see.”
Chapter 34
I found Charlie just before lunch. He was in the exact position I’d left him in earlier that morning, but this time papers were scattered all over his desk. He didn’t seem to be focused on any one in particular.
“Is everything okay?” I asked.
“It’s as good as it’s going to get,” he answered, his eyes downcast. “How did it go with Dr. Skinner?”
“It went well. I’m working at the Academy tomorrow morning with some special children that are going to help me.” I stepped into the room and closed the door behind me. “Look, I can tell something’s wrong with you, and I’d like to help. It’s the least I could do.”
He raised his eyes, meeting my gaze. “I will be the only one to take care of this problem.”
“And what is the problem exactly?”
“A man. I’ve been searching for him for several years.”
“Can’t you use your ability to find him?”
His eyes narrowed, and his voice chilled. “Don’t you think I’ve tried? It’s all I do every day, every night. I think of him, picture him in my mind, feel my hatred for him, and yet, he still escapes me, but two days ago he was spotted. In this city.”
I lowered into a chair, my legs weakened by the anger in his voice. “Who is he?”
“Someone who should’ve died a long time ago. He took something very precious from me, and I won’t rest until he ceases to exist.” He shook his head. “I shouldn’t be telling you any of this. You’re not ready.”
>
“But I am—”
The door flew open and a young man panting heavily like he’d just run up several flights of stairs burst in. “They’ve got a hit, Charlie. They’re leaving now.”
Charlie stood, knocking his chair backwards. “Without telling me?”
“I told them to wait for you, but they wouldn’t.” The young man saw me for the first time and frowned. “Who’s this?”
Charlie rounded his desk. “We have to go. Now, Lance. Get my gear ready.”
“Yes, sir.” Lance ducked out the door.
Charlie hurried after him, but I stood and grabbed his arm. “I want to help.”
He shrugged it off. “Not now.”
I wanted to say more, but he was already down the hall, walking quickly away from me. I blinked. Then blinked again. For years, I’d been holed up in my own prison, doing nothing to atone for the sins I’d committed against others. Now, finally I had a chance. I may not have been ready, but I couldn’t just sit on the sidelines anymore. Too much of my life already had been spent doing nothing.
Without any further hesitation, I hurried after Charlie, but when I reached Sarah’s desk, I couldn’t find him anywhere. “Where did Charlie go?”
“One sec.” Sarah lowered a cell phone from her ear. “Um, he didn’t really say, but I bet it was the second floor. There’s a gym down there he likes to go to.”
I turned to my right and pushed open a stairwell door. Just as I did so, a door closing echoed below me. He was close.
I bounded down the stairs but stopped when I reached the door to the second floor to peer through an elongated window. Just on the other side was a large, gym-like room, the floor covered in blue mats. Hanging punching bags and all kinds of weight lifting equipment were on the left. On the right, at least a dozen people were pulling on black vests and grabbing weapons from off of the wall. Their movements were hurried, almost panicked, as they prepared for what looked like some kind of police raid.
But these people weren’t police or any kind of military. They worked for the Deific, restoring balance to any one group or person who might be a threat to mankind. That’s what Charlie had said, anyway, all those months ago.