“You don’t want to try to buy his love,” she said. “Do you want him to love you because you bought him things? Because, believe me, I’ve had kids tell me that when we make Father’s Day cards at school.”
“Of course not, but I have to get him something.”
“Spencer. Look at this cart.”
They were at the toy store and he’d already gathered an Xbox, a PlayStation, a handheld Switch, and three games for each. Now that he looked at it all, it did seem like overkill. And yet…
“I could say this is for all the birthdays I missed,” he said, still clinging to hope.
Maggie didn’t say anything. She just gave him a look and he sighed in resignation.
“All right. What do you suggest instead?”
“Nintendo has the most games that are age-appropriate. Take my word for it as a teacher. So, the Switch and two games, maybe three, and that’s all.”
He supposed she was right. The guys he knew that played a lot of video games owned Xboxes and PlayStations. Also, just from browsing the game section, he could see Nintendo focused more on little kid games. There was also the other hockey surprise he’d ordered a week ago.
So they re-shelved all but the Switch and three games and Maggie assured him he was making the right choice.
Spencer had a game the night of Zach’s birthday, so as a special treat, he was taking Zach to the morning skate and then to lunch with the guys instead of daycare.
“I’m ready!” Zach yelled as he ran down the hall.
Spencer grinned. “Me too,” he said.
Maggie had already headed to school but would be at the game later.
Taylor said, “Go get in the car, sweetie. Your dad will be there in a sec.”
After the door to the garage closed behind Zach, Taylor said, “I’m still not sure this is a good idea,” she said. “I can still take him to daycare.”
“He’ll be fine. Trust me.”
“Remind the guys to watch their language. I know how you hockey players talk.”
“Relax. Nordy and Cam are bringing their kids too.”
She squeezed his shoulder. “Just do me a favor and remind them. Okay? Please.”
“Will do.”
As he shut the door behind him, he wondered if he should say something to her. She’d been touching him casually more and more and he was sure she didn’t mean anything by it, but it made him uncomfortable. He resolved to pay more attention when she did it and if she touched other people like she did him.
After strapping Zach into his car seat, Spencer turned to see Stacy coming up the drive.
“Hi, Spencer,” she said.
“Stacy, you’re empty-handed,” he joked.
She laughed. “Well, you seem to have two women living with you now so I didn’t figure you needed me to fill your refrigerator anymore.”
“Oh, hey, let me explain,” he said quickly. “See, I recently found out I have a son. That’s him in the car. His name is Zach.”
He went on to give her the barest details. Stacy was understandably flabbergasted, but expressed her joy for his discovery.
“Anyway, his mother recently got a job with the Dragons and is looking for an apartment in the Bay Area.”
“Is that so?” Stacy said. “Why didn’t you tell her to talk to me?”
Stacy was a very successful real estate agent.
“Taylor isn’t looking for a house,” he said. “She needs an apartment.”
Stacy clucked her tongue. “I can still help her. Tell her to give me a call and we’ll have a chat about her budget and needs and I’ll do my best to find her a great place to live.”
“Stacy, that’s really nice of you. I appreciate that.”
“You’re welcome,” she said. “And a piece of advice… I’d move on this as soon as you can. This can’t be easy for Maggie, knowing your ex-girlfriend is here with you 24-7.”
“Hey, Taylor and I are absolutely over,” he said quickly. “And Maggie knows that.”
Stacy held her hands up in surrender. “Even so, it’s not a good arrangement. She may act as if she’s fine with it, but believe me, she’s not.”
Upon arrival at the DISC, Zach received a VIP pass to wear around his neck. Spencer loved this policy, because if Zach wandered off and/or got lost, he’d be easily identifiable. Even so, he grabbed a Sharpie and wrote on the back of the pass, “If found, return this boy to Spencer Corbett.” He’d done this because Zach’s legal last name was Lipp.
Outside the locker room, Spencer poked his head inside. “Everyone decent?”
“Hell no,” Zappala replied. “But I am clothed.”
That got some male laughter.
Team captain, Paul Nordbeck said, “Zinny and Nico are already in here.”
Spencer had arranged for Cam’s little girl, Zinny, and Nico Nordbeck to be there today. Zach had already been over to both kids’ houses for play dates and had become fast friends.
“Okay, the coast is clear,” Spencer said, ushering Zach inside.
The Dragons’ locker room was oval in shape, a design factor that Spencer appreciated. It made it easier to see everyone in the room without having to lean forward or crane his neck. The carpet was Dragon Red and featured the golden Dragon logo. Air circulated freely from the high-tech ventilation system, designed to minimize the stench and only partially successful. Some nights it didn’t seem to be working at all. Near the door hung a large wall-mounted screen, white boards that slid and opened, accordion-style, to cover the screen. On some shelves beneath that were bins that held tape, laces, socks, protein bars, water bottles, bandages, analgesics, etc.
“ZACH!” Zinny yelled.
Wearing an outfit with a purple unicorn on it, Zinny was a cute little thing and as smart as a kid twice her age. Nico wore a miniature version of his father’s jersey and had the same blue eyes and reserved manner as his dad.
The kids streaked across the carpet to greet Zach and they all met in the middle right on the logo. Several players exchanged pointed glances. A couple of throats were cleared.
“Kids!” Paul called out. “Not on the logo.”
“Oops.” Nico and Zinny immediately hopped off to the side while Zach moved more slowly.
“Am I in trouble?” Zach asked.
“No, but don’t step on the logo,” Nico said, pointing to the carpet. “It’s a rule.”
“Why?” Zach asked.
“It’s to show respect to the team,” Spencer explained. “Like taking your hat off when the National Anthem is being played.”
“I have a birthday present for you,” Zinny said, running to Cam, who pulled a small gift bag off the shelf above his head.
“I do too!” Nico said, scrambling to get it from Paul. Nico’s present was a flat square, like an old-fashioned vinyl record album but about half an inch thick.
“Can I open them?” Zach asked Spencer.
“Yes, you can.”
Zach tore open Nico’s first and looked at the shiny white rubbery square with notched edges, puzzled. Spencer knew what it was immediately and felt like an idiot for not thinking of it himself.
“What’s that?” Zinny asked, just as confused as Zach.
“It’s fake ice!” Nico exclaimed. “You put these on the floor like a puzzle and it makes a rink except it’s not real ice. We got you lots of the squares. Not just this one.”
“What a great gift,” Spencer said, nudging Zach.
“Thank you, Nico.”
“We have some too,” Nico said. “My dad put it in one of the downstairs rooms and it’s awesome. I can practice whenever I want. I don’t have to wait to go to the rink, but you have to be careful. I already got in trouble for marking up the wall.”
“I want some fake ice too,” Zinny told Cam, then added, “Please.”
“We’ll see,” Cam said. “We have to convince Koko first.”
“Open my present now,” Zinny said, bouncing excitedly.
Zach tore off the paper and
again looked baffled, even though the box was clearly labeled. That’s when Spencer remembered the kid couldn’t read yet.
“It’s hockey tape and wax,” Zinny said. Her eyes sparkled with excitement. “For your stick.”
“I don’t have a stick,” Zach said.
“You do now,” Spencer said, signaling to Gideon Aguilar, whose stall was close to the stick rack. Gideon had already picked up the child-sized stick Spencer had put there yesterday. He tossed it to Spencer, who caught it one-handed.
Zach gasped. “Is that mine?”
“Happy birthday, Zach,” Spencer said. “Your first hockey stick.”
“Wow,” Zach said, taking it reverently.
“Do you know how to tape your stick?” Nico asked.
“No.”
“I can teach you,” Nico said.
“I can too!” Zinny said.
“You can both teach him,” Paul interjected. “Go sit over there while we get ready.”
“Can we get hot chocolate from the Keurig?” Zinny asked.
“Yes,” Cam said. “But be careful.”
“Let’s get the hot chocolate first,” Zinny said. “Then we’ll tape your stick.”
“But I wanted to watch them skate,” Zach said.
Zinny made a face. “No. That’s boring.”
“Yeah, really boring,” Nico agreed.
That’s when Zinny gasped. “I just got the best idea, you guys. First, we’ll get hot chocolate. Then we’ll teach you how to tape your stick. After that, Nico and I will show you the room where they take care of the players when they’re hurt. We could play doctor!”
Someone snickered and there was some muffled laughter.
With a wry smile, Cam said, “The tour is fine but you’d better not play in there. The trainers won’t like it.”
Spencer patted himself on the back for thinking of inviting Nico and Zinny to come today. One, because Zach needed to make friends here. Two, as veterans of the locker room area, Zinny and Nico knew where everything was and would keep Zach out of trouble. Neither kid was a troublemaker. In fact, the only incident Spencer could remember involved them drawing on the white board with permanent markers instead of the erasable kind.
After the morning skate, the kids put their skates on for some fun and games on the ice. All three kids wore helmets with face cages for extra protection.
“Look, Spencer! Look at his stick,” Zinny said, pulling Zach by the sleeve toward Spencer.
Spencer examined the taping job. It was crooked, uneven and even a little lumpy, but he’d improve with time.
“Great job, you guys. Looks great.”
When Spencer saw Zach take to the ice, he was proud to see how much progress he’d made. The Dragons organization had a daycare here at the practice rink, so it stood to reason that they took the kids onto the ice regularly. Zach skated as much as they would let him, and it had paid off.
“Looking good,” he said as Zach zipped around the back of the goal to come to a stop in front of Spencer. “I think I even saw a little snow on that stop, buddy.” He high-fived him.
Zach beamed at him. “I’ve been practicing.”
“I can tell. Let’s put that new stick of yours to the test. Let’s pass the puck to each other. Have you done that yet?”
“No. They don’t let us use sticks at daycare.”
“No worries. Everyone has to start sometime. You guys up for that?” he asked Cam and Paul.
“Sounds good.”
“Yep.”
They formed up in two lines with the kids on one side, the adults on the other with about four feet between them.
“Okay, pass it,” Spencer said to Zach.
The pucks traveled at various speeds. Nico’s was the fastest, but it flipped and rolled. Zinny had the most accuracy, but Zach, Spencer noticed, wasn’t even holding his stick right. While Paul and Cam instructed their own kids, Spencer addressed Zach’s grip.
“Let’s turn that hand the other way, buddy. There you go. Let’s try again, it’ll be a lot easier this way.”
Spencer sent the puck back and Zach tried again.
“Good. There you go, much better.”
They spent a few minutes just sending it back and forth, nice and easy, then with a little more force. It really brought Spencer back to his early days. He remembered being frustrated with himself but bored by the drills. Naturally, he hadn’t wanted to put in the practice necessary to become better. But eventually he realized improvement didn’t come without it and he wanted to be better than good at hockey. He hoped Zach had that same fire inside him because Spencer was prepared to do anything necessary to foster and encourage that. He was fine with it if the boy decided not to play. Everyone had their own path and Spencer certainly wasn’t going to force his son to follow in his footsteps. However, if Zach did end up seriously pursuing hockey, it would be a dream come true.
After the kids got tired of the drill, they played a shooting game. Like during an egg toss at a picnic, they started right up at the net. With each goal they made, they moved back a foot. Whoever scored the most goals at the end of five minutes was the winner.
Zinny beat them all, but Zach actually came in second, making Spencer feel damn proud of his son.
They went to a nearby Chinese restaurant for dim sum—something Zach had probably never heard of, let alone eaten. The kids loved choosing the small plates from the roving carts and although Zach was skeptical at first—most of his experience with Chinese food was from Panda Express—he enjoyed it. Their waiter even fashioned beginner chopsticks for Zach using a rolled up piece of paper and a rubber band. The kids’ insistence on using chopsticks became a source of amusement. Giggles abounded. Many a dumpling splatted on the table.
34
When Spencer walked in carrying the sleeping birthday boy in his arms, Maggie was kneeling by Lulu’s bed trying to hand feed her.
“Is she still not eating?” he asked in a low voice.
Maggie shrugged. “Not as much as I’d like. I chopped up a little chicken breast and mixed it into her regular food. It’s helped a little.” She looked up at him. “We need to prepare ourselves.”
“I know.” He sighed and went to put Zach down for his nap. When he returned, Maggie was making herself a cup of tea.
“So…how was it?” she asked.
“We had a really great time.”
He enthusiastically recounted their morning and when he told her about Paul and Nico’s present, her eyes went wide.
“Synthetic ice? Huh. I’ve never heard of such a thing. And you can really skate on it?”
“Apparently.”
She laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck. “Some hockey dad you are. You got him video games.”
Spencer laughed. “Hey, I got him the stick. And his skates. That ought to count for something.”
“Yes it does.”
“But you’re right, as usual. How will I build a hockey dynasty with a mindset like that? I’ll end up with a pack of gamers…”
“A…hockey dynasty?”
“Sure. I have this dream of a big family, all made up of hockey players. Even the girls. Sure, it’s about as likely as Congress balancing the budget, but it could happen.”
Maggie laughed but inwardly she was cringing. Because she’d hemorrhaged after giving birth, they’d performed an emergency hysterectomy on her. So not only had she had to deal with the loss of her child, she also faced a future that did not include having children of her own.
At first, the loss of Maya herself had overshadowed everything, but later when Maggie became an adult, she came to feel…less-than and incomplete. As if all the other women in the world were real women and Maggie was only a pretender. The feeling became so pervasive that for a while, she even hated teaching the lesson on the greater than and less than signs in math. Every time someone complained about their period or cramps, Maggie felt a fierce envy. She would have gladly suffered the discomfort and inconvenience of menstruation
if it meant she could have another child.
But no. Fate had denied her any kind of emotional, reproductive justice.
Eventually though, she managed to cut out the negative self-talk and come to accept that adoption or surrogacy were her only options and that they were valid ones. One day, she and her husband might be to a child what the Martins were to Maya.
However, it was one thing to be at peace with this herself and quite another to foist it on a significant other. Whenever she got involved with someone, the feelings of inadequacy would creep back into her thoughts, and with Spencer, she could sense the unworthy feelings growing stronger.
She was going to have to tell him about this. Soon. Today was the first time he’d casually mentioned children, but it wouldn’t be the last, and the longer she kept this secret, the worse it would be when the truth finally came out.
That evening, Maggie and Jade ended up sitting with Taylor and Zach during the game because Spencer had managed to grab two seats next to Maggie’s. What followed was three hours of awkward. Jade acted friendly enough, but she did not like Taylor. Not because of anything Taylor had actually done, but on principle. Jade was Maggie’s best friend and therefore disapproved of anything that threatened Maggie’s happiness and to Jade’s way of thinking Taylor was The Enemy.
“So, how’s the apartment hunting going?” Jade asked Taylor in an innocent tone that was anything but.
Looking very smart in a leather jacket and some killer high-heeled half-boots, Taylor pushed back her cascading blond tresses and smiled. “It’s been hard. Everything I’ve seen so far just isn’t right. This will be the first real home for Zach and me, so I want to make sure it’s a good fit.”
“I want to live with Spencer,” Zach declared. “He has Lulu and Kirby.”
“Kirby is Maggie’s dog,” Jade pointed out. “Not Spencer’s.”
Zach continued. “And boys are supposed to live with their dads,” he added. “Nico said so.”
“Did he?” Maggie said, glancing at Jade who frowned.
When Taylor didn’t comment, Maggie said, “Honey, not all boys live with their dads. A lot of times they live with their moms some of the time and their dads some of the time.”
Animal Attraction (San Francisco Dragons Book 2) Page 20