His fault. His choice.
Swallowing past his suddenly hot throat, he lifted his hand and knocked on her door.
Chapter Sixteen
He had two more days with her. Two days to fit in as many special moments and memories as possible before he left the woman he loved.
“Hey, handsome.” She smiled at him in the open doorway.
Pushing his dark thoughts aside, he smiled back. “Hello, beautiful. Everything okay? You look tired.”
She shook her head. “Just a long day. Trying to get things cleared before the holiday time off.”
“I hear that,” he said. “But it’s time to relax, and I can help with that.”
He bent and swept her off her feet, smiling at her gasp and the way her arms tightened around his neck.
“Liam!” She laughed. “You’re going to hurt yourself.”
Smirking, he carried her inside, closing the door with his foot before he slowly set her feet on the floor.
They stared at each other a beat, then the amusement faded in her eyes, replaced by something warm and strong. Too damn strong for him to resist. Her hands slid up his body, straight into his hair before she pulled his head down and kissed him like he’d been dreaming of all day.
When they broke for air, he only drew back a little. “I’ve been wanting you to do that all day,” he said against her lips.
She chuckled. “Great minds.”
He tightened his grip on her hip while he lifted the other up to cup her face, tilting her to suit him so he could kiss her again, soft at first, then deeper, harder, demanding.
She moaned and pressed closer.
God, he loved when she did that.
Need fisted his groin, and hunger and heat washed through him in a wave so intense it nearly took him to his knees. But he locked them and swept his tongue inside her mouth, memorizing her taste for when he no longer had the privilege of holding her like this.
He didn’t want it to end but it had to so they could drag in air.
“Always so good,” he said against her temple, feeling her tremble against him. He drew back to look into her heated gaze. “You’re shaking.”
“Your fault.”
A wide grin pulled at his lips as fire continued to burn through his veins. “Prepare yourself, because I’m gonna make you shake a whole lot more.”
She returned his grin. “I’m counting on it.”
***
Stacy trembled, not just because of his hot kisses, but because of so much more. She needed Liam. Needed his warm, strong, wonderful arms around her. Needed to feel his strength. Needed him to hold her tight.
Did that make her weak? Maybe. But she didn’t care. She needed him to love her. To make love to her. To show her how he felt…and maybe, just maybe tonight he’d actually say the words she’d felt in his lovemaking over the past few weeks.
Hope…
If hope was for idiots, then she was the biggest one on the planet. Stacy knew it was foolish. She did. She really did but was powerless to quell her optimistic side.
Still, even without the words, she wanted Liam’s touch, his heat, his need for her. God, she needed that. So badly.
She also needed to tell him how she felt. Keeping it in was killing her. She inhaled and held his gaze. “I want you to stay.”
“Great minds,” he said again.
Before she’d had the chance to explain the words weren’t just about tonight but about him leaving Royal Pines, she was crushed against his magnificent chest and his mouth came down on hers for a kiss that was hot, wet, and deliciously deep.
“Liam, I—”
“We’ll talk later,” he said, his hands all over her. “Need you too much.”
Her nipples hardened at his words and the desperation in his sexy, raw tone.
Ever diligent, he backed her up to her bed without disturbing Slater’s slumber by the hearth. A second later he removed the nightgown from her body, leaving her naked but far from cold. The heat in his gaze was enough to warm her from head to toe as well as all the cabins on the property.
“Liam…” She swallowed. “I can barely think when you look at me like that.”
“Thinking is overrated,” he muttered before taking a nipple in his mouth.
Gasping, she thrust her hands into his hair and arched up, seeking more of his warm, wet teasing. “So is…breathing.”
“Mhm.” He hummed around her nipple as he took her down to her bed before his mouth latched on to her other breast, flicking her stiff tip with his tongue.
Her eyes threatened to roll back in her head. “Liam.”
He flashed her a wicked grin. “Nice, but you can do better.”
She choked out a laugh. “So can you.”
Something primal sparked in his eyes, deepening the green to a gorgeous, glittering emerald. “Challenge accepted.”
Kissing and nipping a trail southward, he had her writhing against him in seconds as heat seared through her body with mindboggling force. Without any clothing to slow him down, all she could do was grip the mattress and wriggle against him as heat scalded her veins. And when the talented man wrapped her inner thighs around his ears and sent her on a blissful journey with his talented tongue, she burst, crying out his name in one long, low, heartfelt moan.
Returning from bliss, she could feel Liam grinning against her skin as he kissed his way back up her body.
How could she be hungry for the man so quickly?
But she was. She needed him with a shocking fierceness that defied logic and frightened her. It wasn’t going to be enough. All that he gave would never be enough. Not until she was his, heart, body, and soul.
She was beginning to realize the stark truth.
She already was…and that wasn’t the problem. No. The trouble was convincing him to trust her with his heart, body, and soul.
By the time she got her mind around that bombshell, Liam was naked, wearing a condom and kneeling between her legs, teasing her opening with one hell of a magnificent tip. Then he pushed into her with one hard thrust, and damn…that nearly sent her over again.
“So good,” he murmured, eyes closed, throat and neck muscles tight. “Always so good.”
His palms were on the mattress on either side of her head while he drove in and out of her with slow, purposeful, knowing thrusts. The man was a master at taking her to the edge and keeping her there for as long as he wanted, drawing out her enjoyment until she was mindless for release.
“Please, Liam,” she whispered. “Don’t stop.”
She wanted to add, don’t ever stop, but was afraid it might ruin the moment.
“Never,” he replied.
Even though his response rocked her heart, she knew better than to read anything permanent into the word, no matter how much she wanted it to mean forever.
What it did mean was that he had her back, right here. Right now.
And it was enough. It would have to be, because being here with him, sharing heat, sharing their bodies, sharing parts of their lives over the past few weeks meant the world to Stacy.
It meant everything…
As if feeling it too, he kissed her soft and slow, then long and deep, and when he drew back, he fisted his hands in her hair and stared into her eyes.
The intensity of his expression stole what little breath she could muster, and she felt him shake with the effort it was taking him to hold them both from going over the edge.
“Stacy…”
That was it. The sound of her name on his lips set her off and she clenched hard around him, taking him over that wonderful edge with her to their special kind of heaven.
A few moments later, she opened her eyes and smiled. He hadn’t moved, his weight still pinning her to the bed, his heart thundering against hers. God, she loved that. Loved feeling him breathing hard, knowing that the formidable former SEAL was completely done in, and that she was responsible.
Of course, he was responsible for rocking her world, stealing her s
trength, and zapping brain cells. It was wonderful.
With the inside of her thigh still pressed to his hip and her arms wrapped around him, she caressed his sleek, sweat-dampened back, basking in the afterglow.
The only thing that could make it more perfect was if Liam lifted his head, met her gaze, and told her he didn’t want to let her go.
But his face was buried in her neck, his sexy salt-and-pepper scruff brushing against her, sending tiny shivers over her skin. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the moment.
After all, it would be a shame to stop his sweet, after-sex nuzzling.
***
Two hours later, after they’d eaten some leftover chicken, then enjoyed a very hot shower together, they were towel-drying each other off when his cell phone rang in the other room.
He stiffened. “Sorry. I better get it.”
Then he disappeared from the bathroom. Stacy followed at a slower pace, wanting to give him some privacy but since it was an open area there wasn’t anywhere else for her to go.
She busied herself by cleaning off the table, setting their dishes in the sink while he talked, saying the name Colton.
One of his brothers.
His back was to her—a glorious, muscled backside—when he ended the call a minute later.
After a few seconds during which he didn’t speak or turn around, she cleared her suddenly dry throat.
“Not that I’m complaining about the view or anything but is there a reason you’re still standing there? Is something wrong?”
He turned around but before hope had a chance to flicker to life, he blew out a breath and nodded. “Yeah.”
“Uh oh.” She stiffened, her pulse suddenly pounding loud in her ear. “Why does this feel like you’re about to tell me you’re leaving?”
“Because I am, sort of,” he replied, and she stopped breathing.
Just stopped.
He cleared his throat. “I’m always at the job site when we break ground on a new project and the job in Fort Worth is scheduled to start next week.”
“Next week?”
He nodded.
It was so soon, she thought. “What about—”
“Roger can finish here,” he said. “Everything is under roof and wired. It’s mostly cosmetics left.”
That wasn’t what she’d been about to ask, but it answered her question anyway.
There was no us. If there had been, he’d be telling her right now how he wanted to continue to see her, and they’d figure out how to do it long distance.
But the silence told her nothing had changed since they started doing the “bed thing.” He was leaving. Her chest squeezed tight.
But she couldn’t blame him. It was her own doing.
His gaze softened. “I’m sorry, Stacy. You knew this had an expiration date. Four weeks. Going past that…isn’t good. That’s not until this Friday, but…”
His voice trailed off, but it held a finality to it, and she wasn’t about to beg. What was the use?
The man might’ve only stood a few feet away, but it suddenly felt like miles.
“I know.” She nodded, blinking back the tears burning her eyes. “You’re right. I was the one who initiated this knowing you were leaving after the job was done.”
He closed his eyes and swallowed. “God, I didn’t want to hurt you again.”
“It’s okay.” She sniffed, swiping the wetness from her face. “I went into this with my eyes open this time. It’s my own fault for letting my heart get involved again.”
When his eyes opened again, they were cool. His gaze resolute. Distant.
“I should probably go,” he said, and began to pull on his clothes.
She wanted to protest, tell him no, they still had a few days left. But what was the point? It wouldn’t change anything. He’d still leave, and her heart would break even more.
She let out the breath she’d been holding and wrapped the towel around her that she’d been holding. Stupid to feel modest now, but she’d never felt more naked and exposed in her life.
Don’t look back, she told herself.
She wouldn’t begrudge herself for falling for this man again. Or still. Because she’d learned to do what she’d never thought possible since her mother abandoned her, and her father had chosen death instead of her and Tracy. She’d learned how to love without hesitation, commitment, strings. How to give her whole heart and soul with no regrets.
But damn, it hurt badly. So badly.
Liam walked to the door, put his hand on the handle and exhaled long and slow before facing her. “This place suits you,” he said, repeating what he’d told her when she’d first moved into this cabin, and he did it with his usual blunt honesty. “It’s peaceful and challenging. Warm and inviting. I’m glad you found it. You deserve to be happy, Stacy. You deserve the world.”
Before she could get any words out of her swollen throat, he was gone.
“But all I want is you,” she whispered.
Chapter Seventeen
Tuesday afternoon, Liam sat at his desk and stared at his computer screen, trying to concentrate on the paperwork Colton had emailed him from the zoning department. But he kept zoning out, thinking about Stacy. About last night, when he’d left her.
Again.
The ache he carried in his chest since then had only increased. He rubbed at it. Hard. God, it hurt to breathe. It’d been less than a full day and he already missed her. So damn much.
He’d walked to his door numerous times during the night to go to her cabin and beg her forgiveness, but each time his mind balked. Just because they wanted to be together didn’t mean they should.
Didn’t mean karma would leave them alone.
It hadn’t the last time.
No. It would never be fine. And that was just it. Liam would always worry, and it would cause him to hold back from Stacy. She didn’t deserve that. No way could he do that to her. He wouldn’t do that to her. So, what was the sense in trying to fix things? He’d always carry the guilt of losing those men. Of losing…
He wouldn’t let his mind go back that far.
The point was, the guilt was his for life. It was never going to stop. And even though he was no longer in the military, he still had a lot of men to worry about. His crew. He’d always be looking over his shoulder, waiting for something awful to transpire. How could he possibly make her happy if he was too preoccupied with what might happen?
He couldn’t.
The image of Stacy’s dark, anguished gaze had haunted him all damn night and day. He hated that he was responsible for putting that miserable look on her face.
She didn’t deserve it.
“Hey, Liam,” Finn said, walking into the office without knocking, followed by Terry then Brett.
Alarm prickled across his weighted shoulders.
Although the trailer wasn’t small, it felt that way with the tall, broad men taking up real estate. And it wasn’t lost on him how they all stood between him and the door. Shit. He stiffened and fought his rising apprehension. “What’s going on?”
“You tell us,” Brett said.
He raised a brow. “About what?”
Finn and Brett remained where they were while Terry walked over to study the blueprints of the additions pinned on the wall above the couch.
The couch where he and Stacy had enjoyed—
“About you leaving for Fort Worth this week,” Brett said.
Terry nodded. “Yeah…let’s start with that.”
Liam pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled. “Because that job starts then and I’m always at the groundbreakings.” He released his nose and lifted his head. “Look, if you’re worried about this job, don’t be. Roger is more than capable of making sure everything is finished correctly and on time. That’s his job. I do the groundbreaking and he does the finishing.”
“It ain’t about this job, son,” Terry said, still standing by the couch but facing him now.
He narrowed his gaze. “Then w
hat is it about?”
“It’s about you leaving Stacy,” Brett stated, his chin lifted.
“Again,” Finn added.
Son-of-a…
He rose slowly to his feet and eyed the large bodies blocking his exit. “You sure you want to stand in my way?”
Each brother raised one brow in tandem. If Liam wasn’t so annoyed, he probably would’ve found it amusing.
But he was far from amused.
“You sure you want to try us?” Brett chuckled while Finn remained relaxed but on alert.
Liam squeezed his fists and the cracking echoed through the hollow structure in a warning the Brennans appeared ready to ignore.
“You aren’t going to need those,” Terry said. “So, put them away and hear us out.”
Since it was obvious he wasn’t leaving until they said their piece, he relaxed his hands and retook his seat. “All right. But I have my reasons for leaving, and Stacy knows about them.” Well…most of them. “I made sure she did before we decided to see each other while I was here.”
“What I can’t understand is why’d you walk away from her.” Terry shook his head. “You’re too smart to leave a good woman like her and you sure as hell ain’t the type to deliberately hurt the woman who loves you.”
Brett nodded. “And everyone can see you love her too, so don’t try to deny it.”
Liam met his gaze. “Who’s denying it?”
“They why would you walk away from her?” Terry asked. “It makes no sense.”
Finn stiffened then narrowed his eyes. “This has to do with the code from four years ago, doesn’t it? You think you’re responsible for the death of your brothers. That because you were seeing the woman one of your team had previously gone out with, you brought bad luck to that mission.”
“I was seeing her, and it did bring bad luck. We lost two fucking men! Two. Because I couldn’t resist…” Liam paused to find some semblance of control.
As if that hadn’t been bad enough, he knew it could’ve been worse.
It could’ve been Stacy. Some freak accident could’ve taken her life like—
“Give yourself a break, son,” Terry said, pulling Liam’s mind from the darkness of his past as he stepped closer. “There’s always the danger of death on missions. Don’t see how it was your fault.”
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