by Lee Savino
Dang, he’s good. Ready to play the sympathy card. Offer his shoulder to cry on. Was this his plan all along?
I take a deep, painful breath, ignoring the knives lining the inside of my chest. I can’t sit here deliberating about the state of mine and Bogdan’s relationship. Arkdhem has shown his cards and I’ve got to shut this down once and for all.
“That’s between me and Bogdan. Regardless, I am not your Tribute. And... I love him.” Which I probably should have told Bogdan first, but Arkdhem has rattled me a little. I don't know how long a bonding is supposed to take. Does it mean something that we aren't bonded yet? Arkdhem seems to think so. Breathe in, breathe out. Don't panic. It might mean nothing.
Arkdhem’s mouth pinches. “You do not know your feelings.”
Oh no he didn’t. “Don’t try to tell me how I feel,” I snap, finally losing my temper a little. “Let's be honest here, Arkdhem, when it comes down to it, I don’t think you actually want me. I think you want a Tribute, any Tribute, and since I'm here and you don't like Bogdan, you think I'll do. But to you, I could be any woman, who I am as an individual doesn't matter."
A shadow falls over the warrior’s face and I take a step back, suddenly a little fearful. Suddenly, Arkdhem doesn't seem so harmless. There is a long pause as we stare at each other.
“Very well.” Arkdhem says finally, his mouth twisted as if he’s eaten something sour. “But you will regret it. In the end, I am a better match.” He says it so fiercely that I know he truly believes it.
Spinning on his heel, he stalks off toward Dawn and the other warriors, looking so hurt that I feel a little bad. But I feel way worse because I accidentally disobeyed Bogdan. I didn't mean to, of course, but I know he won't be happy when he hears... if he hears...
Ugh. Did I invite any that? I review all my interactions with Arkdhem. If I had known Arkdhem felt this way, I would’ve kept my distance from the beginning, taken Bogdan's admonitions more seriously. I thought Bogdan was just being overprotective, but no, there was something there. Still, I don't think I did anything wrong, but I'm not sure whether or not Bogdan will agree with that assessment.
I should tell Bogdan what happened. But a little voice argues with me. What purpose would it serve? He already wants to pick a fight with Arkdhem. Maybe now Arkdhem will back off and Bogdan will sense that he has, and everyone will get along. A girl can hope, right?
Bogdan
My Tribute is hiding something.
Her worry is strong enough for me to feel, tugging at my senses, and nearly impossible to ignore. Perhaps our descent to the planet? Or the planet itself? The shuttle is already descending, it is too late for her to stay on the Command Ship, but she does not have to leave the shuttle if she so desires.
I capture her hand and squeeze. "If you are too nervous, you may stay on the shuttle."
"Oh no," she says, her mood lightening as she shakes her head at me. "You aren't getting off that easy. I want to step onto an alien planet. It's not dangerous, right?"
“We will be fine,” I assure her. “This planet it heavily forested, including the island we are landing on, but we found a safe grassy area and cleared the vicinity of any predators. We set up a large perimeter for you and Tribute Dawn to explore.”
“That’s good.” Her brow wrinkles. “You didn’t disturb the area too much, I hope.”
“No. The section we chose isn’t populated with the larger, more dangerous fauna of this planet. And to clear the section, we set up signals that transmit a high-pitched frequency. Annoying but not fatal. All the larger beasts left already.”
“Gotcha,” she murmurs, but seems distracted. She tries to look around me at the rest of the shuttle crew, strapped to the sides of the narrow shuttle. I stiffen. Who is she trying to see?
Across from us, Tribute Dawn is secured next to the High Commander. Her face is split by a large smile and she wriggles in her harness, practically bouncing. I cannot make out exactly what she is saying, but she is chattering to him excitedly. Compared to her, my Pareena is subdued, and her unhappy emotions gnaw at me.
“You need not worry,” I try again. "It will be an easy trip. I will keep you safe."
“I’m not worried.” But now she’s chewing on her lip and glancing over her shoulder before turning back to the front and nervously fidgeting in her seat. I turn to see who she’s looking at and I am fairly certain she looked at Arkdhem.
Is she trying to communicate with him?
I blank my expression and look down at my Tribute. I had given her permission to go with him and Dawn to the replicator this morning. I had misgivings about it, but the need for clothes suitable for exploring the planet seemed more important than my dislike of Arkdhem. Perhaps I was wrong to think so, although the clothing she is wearing does seem more comfortable for her. She particularly seems to like the top for some reason. I can feel a small spurt of pleasure from her every time she looks down at it.
“Is there something you wish to tell me?” I ask.
“No, everything’s fine,” she says quickly.
We are not fully bonded, but I am enough in tune with her emotions now to know that she is being untruthful. Scowling, suddenly just as anxious as she is, I feel a kind of rage slipping over me. My Tribute is lying to me and it has something to do with Arkdhem. I am sure of it.
My suit flashes streaks of yellow and red. Jealousy. Anger. On display for anyone looking at me. Fortunately, no one seems to be. They have not witnessed my loss of control.
“You will tell me.” I say to her, before turning in my harness to study Arkdhem. We Tsenturions are all in full armor and his is neutral gray. His face is turned away, so I can only see the side of his helmet. If he has said something to my Pareena to turn her against me... I will challenge him, and not even the High Commander will be able to gainsay me.
“Commence landing sequence,” Kalexston says. There’s a slight bump as we enter the atmosphere.
“Does it have to do with Arkdhem?” I growl under my breath so only she can hear.
“Later,” she whispers back. “I’ll tell you later. Promise.”
Somewhat mollified, I lean back and brace for landing.
20
Pareena
"The sky is blue." Dawn sounds disappointed and I have to laugh.
"We could see that much from space," I tease her, but I know what she means, she wanted something very alien.
Instead, we got a planet that is slightly off somehow.
The sky is blue, but it's not quite the right shade of blue. It's close, but just off enough that I'm conscious of it and it's messing with my head a little. Same thing with the foliage. I've never been that interested in plants, so a botanist might immediately notice a lot of non-Earth fauna, but for me, I just notice that the green is a little wrong. Too deep in some places, too oddly hued in others. A lot of the plants look kind of shiny.
Enough to make me feel uneasy, despite how good it feels to be standing on actual ground, with a breeze blowing through my hair, and the sun shining down on me. I tip my head back to feel the warmth on my face.
Of course, it might not be the colors that are making me feel strange. I wonder if I'm picking up on Bogdan's emotions. He knows something’s wrong.
Frankly, I’m wondering why I thought I could hide from him. He’s more and more in tune with me. Thankfully Gavrill sensed the tension as well and, as soon as we disembarked from the shuttle, sent Arkdhem on a mission with several other warriors, while he and Bogdan lead teams around the immediate perimeter of the field we landed in.
Following orders, Dawn and I are standing in the middle of the field, right next to the shuttle, where they deemed us 'safest'. The woods are dark enough that I can't see into them, but I know there are warriors in there too. I'm almost a little amused at how serious they are, when I know they've already scanned the planet to death and sent scouts to explore the island. I wonder if their paranoia is symptomatic of the decimation of their homeworld or if it's just part
of being a warrior.
At the other end of the field is the beach and I want to go running over there so badly. What I wouldn't give to go swimming...
“The perimeter is secure,” the High Commander announces, striding back toward us with several warriors behind him. Bogdan is returning from the other side and I smile at him, although I still feel a bit anxious. He knows something's up, but I still haven't figured out the best way to tell him about Arkdhem's approaching me. Or if I even should.
Thankfully, there's no sign of Arkdhem and the warriors he's leading at the moment. They're still patrolling, taking samples of the planet to study back on ship. I feel a bit better that this little trip isn't just a jaunt to placate Dawn and me. Although, if it was, I wouldn't protest.
It feels so good to be outside. Smelling Earth-like smells. Actual ground under my feet. And every time the wind blows through my hair, I smile. The first time, I teared up. I missed this.
Bogdan says something low to Gavrill before approaching me. The expression on his face is stern, almost foreboding, and my anxiety spikes. Dammit.
“Come,” he commands, holding out a hand. Guess it’s our Come-to-Master talk.
“This place is nice,” I mention half-heartedly as he pulls me to the edge of the field, nearly into the forest. There are big prehistoric-looking ferns and a canopy of trees with low hanging blue orbs—some sort of fruit, offering both shade a little bit of privacy. “Thanks for letting us come.”
“Sit here, my Pareena,” he orders, pointing to a rock that's just about the right size for a bench. I sigh and do as he says, feeling like a student called into the principal’s office. Back in the middle of the field I can see Dawn and Gavrill talking, and she's pointing to the beach. Maybe she can convince him to let us go swimming. Standing in the field in the sun is nice, but the beach would be even better.
Reaching down, Bogdan raises my chin with a finger, grabbing my attention. So much for distracting myself. “You are keeping secrets from me, Pareena. And you lied to me. You are anxious and worried, and it has something to do with Arkdhem. I do not like it.”
I flinch and then frown as what he says permeates.
“Wait, how do you know I'm anxious and worried? And how do you know that I lied?” That all seems very specific. True, but specific. How could he possibly be sure of that?
“I can feel you.” He presses a hand to his chest. “Here. Everywhere. Can you not feel me?”
A strong sense of worry and affection surges through me. Not just mine, his. And if I'm accepting all of this as reality, and not just a coma dream, that means I'm not feeling his emotions because I made them up, it means...
“Is this the bond?” I ask, a little wondering, a lot hopeful. Because this is not the first time that I've thought I could feel what he's feeling, even though we don't have the mate mark yet. That's supposed to come later anyway though. The insecurity that Arkdhem had stirred in me earlier fades, especially as I can feel Bogdan's affection—directed at me—grow.
“I think so.” He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, his lips curving up into a smile as he gently teases me. “I have never been bonded until now.”
My eyes fill with tears of happiness. Yeesh, so emotional. But maybe since I'm also feeling his emotions, maybe that explains it.
"Do I have the mark?" I look down at myself, but my t-shirt covers up pretty much everything.
"I do not think so, not yet," Bogdan says, to my disappointment. He smiles, obviously feeling it. "Do not worry, my Pareena, it will come." Wiping away my tears, he lifts me, positioning himself to sit on the rock and arranging me in his lap. He’s so big I fit easily. We cuddle like that for a moment of peace and I can feel our combined happiness coursing through me. This close, focusing on them, it is easy to tell which are my emotions and which are his, even though they are so similar. “We will discuss the bonding later. Now you must tell me what is troubling you.”
I turn so I am facing him and put my forehead against his. I know he can feel the consternation rising inside of me. “You have to promise not to hurt anyone.”
“I would never hurt you,” he frowns, and I stop his lips with a finger.
“Not just me. Anyone.” I give him as stern a look as I can. His body stiffens. “I mean it.”
“Tell me,” he growls. I sigh, realizing I'm probably not going to get him to promise anything. But chances are, whatever he's thinking is way worse than what actually happened, so maybe by telling him the bare facts it'll actually calm him down.
"Right after I finished making my clothes, a warrior came to ask Dawn for some help with some kind of yoga session he and some of the other warriors were having, which unintentionally left me sort of alone with Arkdhem for a few minutes."
To my relief, I feel Bogdan relax slightly. "I will not blame you for that, my Pareena," he reassures me, and I feel his fingers reaching up to my hair, twining a long lock around them. "I gave you permission to leave my room with him. You were in a public corridor while Dawn attended to the other warriors, you were not truly alone. Is that all?"
I tense and I feel him tense again. "Um, well, almost all. He took the opportunity of near-privacy to express his concern over our mating and put himself forward as an alternative. I made it clear that I am very happy with you and I would not be happy with him, and he backed off."
Unfortunately, this time Bogdan doesn't immediately relax the way I was hoping.
“I see,” he says quietly, before I can reassure him that it's really not a big deal. “And why did you not share this with me immediately? Why did you try to hide it?"
“I didn’t want you guys to fight.” I give him a pleading look, but he doesn't reassure me.
Pulling me to him, he gives me a hard kiss before lifting me off his lap so he can rise up and take my hand. I trot along at his side as we move back into the clearing, toward Gavrill and Dawn.
“What are you going to do?” I ask, worriedly.
“What needs to be done,” he answers vaguely, but as we enter the brightly lit meadow, his helmet covers his face, along with his full armor.
Yeah. That's... not reassuring.
Bogdan
Arkdhem tried to steal my Pareena from me. I can tell there is more to what happened between them than what she is saying. Not that she is lying, exactly, but she is—what is the human saying?—putting the best spin on it. None of her words can hide his dishonor though.
He abused my trust of him, which was little enough to begin with. I should have known better. He should have known better. It is not unheard of for Tsenturions to compete for the affections of a shared interest, but we are no longer on Tsentur and Pareena was given to me. She is bonding with me. Even on Tsentur, his actions would be seen as underhanded, as he waited until she was in his care, and I was not present, to announce his intentions.
This insult cannot go unanswered.
Arkdhem is leading his patrol back onto the opposite side of the field and I growl as soon as I see him. My Pareena pulls on my hand, her footsteps slowing, but she is no match for my strength, much less my anger.
"Please don't make a scene," she begs. "It wasn't a big deal."
Perhaps not to her, but she does not understand our culture, our rules of courtship. Those rules are changing now that we have Tributes, but not so much that it is acceptable for Arkdhem try and sneakily steal her away from me, to attempt to undermine our bonding without publicly announcing his intentions. Even with my general lack of trust for the warrior, I would never have dreamed he'd stoop so low.
He catches my eye and straightens, staring me down. The warriors following him stumble to a halt, obviously confused about why he's come to such an abrupt stop.
"Bogdan, please," my Pareena whispers, tugging on me, but it is too late. I gently shake her off, pushing her behind me so I can storm forward, my armor sliding over my skin. I feel her hesitation and then her resolve as she begins to follow me.
"Bogdan?" The High Commander's voice cuts a
cross the field, but I do not slow. Out of the corner of my eye, I see him and Tribute Dawn heading toward me. But I will not be stopped, and I pick up my pace.
"I challenge you," I shout, pointing at Arkdhem. All other movement in the field seems to still, the other warriors staring in shock. There has not been a challenge among our warriors since the Great Devastation. I can already see the disapproval on some of their faces, as our focus should be on fighting the Vgotha, not each other... but Arkdhem has gone too far. "You approached my Tribute and attempted to sway her interest to you, while pretending to be an honorable escort."
"What?" Tribute Dawn gasps behind me.
Arkdhem says nothing, glaring at me. His armor was already up but now a helmet forms around his head. The other warriors of his patrol are now looking at him in shock and a little consternation. Wondering at his actions. He seems surprised as well.
Did he think my Pareena would not tell me? Did he truly expect her to choose him, even in such a small manner as keeping a secret from me? Then again, had I not pressed, she might have done just that, but not because she has any desire for him. I can feel that she has nothing but platonic affection and a touch of exasperation for him. But he still tried for more.
Coming to a halt, just out of any weapons' reach, I snarl at him. "You have no honor."
The jab makes him jerk but he just glares harder. I can almost see his mind working, deciding whether or not to meet my challenge. I have been a warrior for longer and I hold my position as the High Commander's second for a reason. In a fair fight, it is highly unlikely that Arkdhem will triumph and we both know it.
Yet to forfeit a challenge before it has even begun is an admission of wrongdoing, and he clearly does not wish for that either.
"Is this true?" The High Commander comes up behind me, directing his question at Arkdhem.
Now Arkdhem does look a little ashamed, his gaze swerving away from the High Commander's for a moment before he defiantly lifts his chin and nods. "Bogdan did not even want a Tribute. He wanted to end the Tribute program and keep any of us from receiving Tributes. Tribute Pareena deserved to know she had an option, a warrior who does desire her and would treat her with the reverence and care she merits."