by Levine, Nina
Hyde’s face clouded over with displeasure. “And what exactly would that involve?”
“I’d have to threaten him with something. I’d need the debt wiped with no payment involved, so that’s the only way to make that happen.”
“Fuck, Kick. This is dangerous territory. You really want to get mixed up with Gambarro? I can assure you once you’re on his radar he’ll have you in his sights and won’t rest ‘til he takes care of you in whatever way he deems fit.”
I blew out a long breath. “I fuckin’ know that, Hyde, but what choice do I have? If I don’t step in, her father is dead.”
“And if you do step in, you’re a target going forward.” He leant forward. “And the club’s a fucking target.”
“Yeah.”
He shook his head and stood. “Stay out of it, Kick. The club doesn’t need any more trouble. We’re still waiting to see if Silver Hell connects us with what you and King did the other night; this is more shit we don’t need.”
Fuck.
* * *
“Please, Kick. I’m desperate,” my sister begged me over the phone at three o’clock that afternoon. She needed a babysitter for a couple of hours while she attended her university lecture.
“I can do it, Lina, but fuck, where the hell is Dave?” Her asshole ex-husband always let her down and it pissed me off.
“He’s drunk again. He just called me, like five fucking minutes ago, to say he couldn’t make it now because he accidentally drank too much at the pub after work.” Not only did she sound angry, but I could hear the exhaustion in her voice. Fuck, that asshole would be answering to me.
“I’ll be there soon,” I promised. Hanging up, I eyed Nitro who I’d been talking to about bike engines again, and said, “Sorry man, I’ve gotta go help my sister out.”
“Sure, brother. We good for Saturday?” he asked, watching as I stood.
We’d planned to work on his engine. “Yeah, I’ll probably get to your place by eleven.”
He gave me a chin lift and I headed out.
When I arrived at Lina’s house twenty minutes later, she seemed even more frazzled. My brows knit together. “What’s wrong?”
“Dave just called again and said he’d be here after all.” She gave me a pained look. “Kick, I don’t want him anywhere near the kids, not when he’s drunk.”
I placed my hand on her upper arm. “I’ll take care of him, okay? I don’t want you worrying about it. You just go and do your shit and leave Dave to me.”
Tears pricked her eyes and she collapsed into my arms. “I don’t know how much longer I can do this,” she sobbed.
Fuck, things were worse than I realised. “What the fuck’s going on, Lina?”
She clung to me and sobbed for a good few minutes before pulling away and wiping her eyes. Sniffling, she admitted, “He does this often. And sometimes he turns up and gets aggressive with me if I won’t let him in the house.”
“Fuck, me!” I yelled, the anger punching through my body, “Why the fuck didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“I didn’t want this to happen!” she yelled back. “I wanted to try and sort it out without involving you because I knew you’d resort to violence to fix it.”
I scowled at her. “Sometimes the only thing that works is violence.”
She hung her head for a moment and then gave me her eyes again. Sad eyes. “I know you won’t get this, but I still love him. After everything he’s done, I still love him, and even though I know we aren’t good together and can never go back to what we had, I don’t want you to hurt him,” she said softly, her words pleading with me to understand.
I roughly rubbed the back of my neck. “Shit, Lina. You’re right, I don’t get it. The guy fucked around on you, he’s a shit father, and you want mercy for him? Even after he’s gotten aggressive with you?”
Her lips spread into a thin line. “Some people don’t know how to do better, Kick. For some, their best is our worst, and it’s not always their fault,” she said softly, calmly.
My eyes widened. “Don’t sprout that psych bullshit at me that you’re learning, ‘cause I’m not fuckin’ interested in excuses. How can you stand here and cry on my shoulder about him one minute and then turn around and defend him the next?”
She sighed. “If I went through life holding onto the shit people have done to me, I’d be an angry and depressed person. I have to let it go . . . for me, not them. And sometimes you can love and hate someone at the same time. I choose to let both in, to not deny my feelings and only concentrate on the bad. And as far as crying on your shoulder, yeah, I’ve reached a point where I’m feeling overwhelmed. Sometimes you just need a good cry and then you can keep going.”
I listened to everything she said, and while I didn’t agree with it, I respected her enough to try to follow her wishes. At least until that didn’t work and then we’d do things my way. Because I was sure as fuck that her way wouldn’t work. “I won’t hurt him, but I will make it clear that I’m watching him, and if he doesn’t pull his head in, I’ll be stepping in for you.”
“Thank you,” she said as she stood on her toes to kiss my cheek. “You’re a good brother, Kick.”
“We’ll see if you still think that after he fucks up again and I lose my shit at him.”
She shook her head. “You have so little faith in people.”
“It’s what happens when you’ve been fucked over by people too often, babe.”
Her face grew wistful. “We need to find you someone to love. Someone who will love you so much you might start to believe in people again.”
I ignored her and jerked my chin towards the front door. “Go. You don’t want to be late.”
She grinned at me and turned to walk away. “I’m going to start looking,” she threw over her shoulder as she left the room.
I shook my head to myself as I went in search of the kids. When my sister got an idea in her head she never let it go. She could try all she liked but I’d never be like her. She was too fucking compassionate and forgave too easily.
There’d only been two people in my life who I’d ever thought I’d be able to forgive if needed.
Turned out me and forgiveness didn’t get along well.
Chapter Seven
Evie
I slammed my front door and trudged down the hall. My efforts this afternoon to get hold of money for my father’s debt had been for nothing. No one had been able to offer me a cent and I’d run out of people to ask. Dread snaked through me at the thought of what would happen to Dad if I couldn’t find the cash for him.
The silence and heat of the house was suffocating. After spending the drive home completely in my own head, riddled with thoughts about my father, I needed music to drown them out. I dumped my bag on the kitchen counter and switched on the air conditioning and stereo before I headed to the shower. Maree would be here to pick me up in a couple of hours and I needed to clean the grime of the day off. I needed this night out tonight like I hadn’t needed one in a long time.
* * *
Maree clinked her glass with mine and indicated for me to take a sip. “Here’s to hot sex with Kick,” she said, laughing.
I rolled my eyes. “I should never have told you,” I muttered. But the conversation about Kick had put my worry about Dad out of mind, and that was what I needed tonight.
Her eyes twinkled with mischief. “You should totally have told me. I wanna meet this man who’s got you all flustered.”
I shifted on my stool. The humidity in the outdoor bar we were at had caused my long hair to stick to my neck. Thank god I’d worn a sleeveless dress tonight. Probably didn’t help that the conversation about Kick was getting me all hot and bothered. I eyed Maree and decided to open up to her about Kick and my family. She’d only known me for two years and I hadn’t shared much with her so far. I’d had enough alcohol tonight to spill my life story, though. “I’ve known Kick pretty much my whole life,” I began.
Her eyes widened. “Wow.”<
br />
“His family and mine lived on the same street and our mothers were best friends. Kick was a year older than me and always kept an eye out for me at school, made sure I was okay and wasn’t being picked on.”
“I’m guessing if someone picked on you, he came down on them.”
I smiled. “Yeah, he did. Him and Jeremy. The three of us were inseparable.” The memories swirled around me, causing butterflies in my stomach.
“So your families are best friends and you two grew up thinking you’d have a happy ever after together?” she asked, a tinge of hopefulness in her voice. Maree dreamt of happy ever afters.
She was so far from the truth. “No, our - ”
A voice from behind cut me off. “No, my father fucked it all up when he fucked Evie’s mother.” The bitterness in Kick’s voice could not be missed and I spun around in shock. I didn’t realise he still felt that way about his father.
As I stared at him, Maree said, “Well, that would do it.”
He tore his gaze from mine to look at her. “Yeah, it would.”
I felt the need to put some perspective on it. “It takes two to tango, Kick. Your father wasn’t the only one at fault.”
His hard gaze met mine again. “Evie, your mother had just lost a child, for fuck’s sake, her marriage was crumbling under the strain of that as well as your father’s gambling, and she was in pain… My father knew she was vulnerable and he went after her knowing full well she wasn’t in her right mind. Don’t make excuses for him.”
I took a long swig of my drink. These memories sucked, and I wanted the alcohol to blot them out.
Before I could say anything, Maree asked quietly, “Your mother lost a child?”
I nodded, sadness enveloping me. “Yeah, my sister, Shelly…” My voice cracked and I stopped talking. Shit, this never got any easier. Not even after nineteen years.
Because the guilt still tears me apart.
“Our families were on our yearly holiday that we took every summer when Shelly fell out of a tree,” Kick explained, watching me carefully, his eyes full of concern.
All three of us sat in silence, lost in thought. Our fun night had quickly turned sombre. I stared at my glass, absently running my finger around the rim while Shelly occupied my mind. When I looked up, I found Kick watching me intently, his shoulders and body tense.
Eventually, he said, “I need a drink. Either of you want another one?”
Thank God.
We nodded, gave him our orders, and then sat watching him walk to the bar. My gaze shifted over his white t-shirt that loosely skimmed his muscles, and then moved down to the black jeans and motorcycle boots. I’d never known another man to wear sexy the way Kick did.
Maree cut into my thoughts. “Babe, he’s hot. How the hell did you walk away from him? I don’t know if I would ever let him out of my bed if he was mine.”
She was the best kind of friend a woman could have. Always able to read my needs, I knew she’d deliberately changed the subject. She’d known I didn’t want to talk about my family shit anymore. I smiled at her and then winked. “I can tell you now, if Kick was yours, you definitely wouldn’t want to let him out of your bed.”
She grinned. “You’re a dirty, dirty woman, Evie Bishop. But seriously, what happened between you two?”
I sighed and leant my elbows on the table. “We argued a lot. And on top of that, Kick’s got a darker side he won’t share with me. Like, he would just shut down and disappear for days at a time. I know he’s trying to protect me but he’s never understood that there’s nothing he could do that would stop me from loving him. He’s always been there for me, every single time I needed him, so I would always be there for him.”
“So you still love him?”
“I never stopped loving him, but I walked away because there’s no future for a couple where one of the partners won’t give themself completely.”
Her eyes twinkled again. “So a little sex on the side would be okay then.”
I laughed, the alcohol in me softening my resolve a little. “It would be a bad idea.”
“What would be a bad idea?” Kick asked as he placed our drinks on the table.
His voice slid right through me. When I met his gaze and found heat there, the alcohol buzzing through me collided with my desire for him and caused the kind of need no woman could deny. Against all my better judgements, I flirted with him. “Sleeping with you,” I said.
He didn’t skip a beat. “No, that would be the best fuckin’ idea you’ve had in a long time.”
I cocked my head to the side. “You don’t think it’d be a good idea for us to get to know each other again before we had sex?”
“Baby, you and I know each other better than we know anyone else.” He moved so our faces were close and whispered, “Some days I think I know you better than I know myself.”
The air whooshed out of me and I reached my hand out to the table. “I need a drink. Quick,” I muttered, and once he’d passed it to me, I gulped half of it straight down. Placing it back on the table, I said, “How do you do that?”
“Do what?”
“That thing where you say something sweet that makes me want to forget everything we’ve been through and let you back in?”
“There’s nothing sweet about me, Evie.” His eyes flashed hardness for a moment before reverting back to the softer gaze he usually reserved for me.
“Not true. You just gave me sweet.”
“No, I just gave you the truth. Don’t mistake that for sweet,” he said with the hard tone I knew so well. It was the tone he used whenever he was about to shut down on me.
“You two should totally get a room. Or maybe you should schedule a date for Valentine’s Day and work your shit out,” Maree said.
I answered her without taking my eyes off Kick. “He doesn’t do Valentine’s Day. Kick’s not your hearts and flowers kind of man.”
“She’s right, but I do make sure my woman is satisfied in other ways on Valentine’s Day,” he said, eyes still on me, a promise held deep inside them.
As lust roared through me, I gulped the rest of my drink down. When I’d drained the glass, I asked Kick, “Jesus, was that a double? It was strong.”
“Yeah.”
I raised my brows. “You trying to get me drunk?”
He smirked. “Don’t need to. You’ve already taken care of that.”
I decided I needed a moment away from him so I hopped off my stool. “I’m going to the ladies’, Maree. You wanna come? Kick can look after our table.”
“No, babe, you go. I’m gonna interrogate your man while you’re gone.”
I laughed. Maree was the queen of interrogation but what she didn’t know was that Kick was the king of evasion. “Have fun, you two,” I said and left them to it.
I wobbled my way to the ladies’ room. Kick was right when he said I was drunk. Time to slow the drinks down or else tonight would go way past messy.
The line at the ladies’ was long, and I started chatting with some of the women, so it took me twenty minutes to get back to the table. As I’d suspected, Kick must have evaded most of Maree’s questions because she looked frustrated. “How did your interrogation go?” I asked her with a grin.
She poked her tongue at me. “You knew I’d have no luck, didn’t you?”
“Totally, but who knew, maybe you would be the one to break him.”
She stood and grabbed her bag off the table. “I’m done for the night, guys.”
I frowned. “Really? I thought we’d catch a cab together.”
“I got a call while you were gone.” She grinned mischievously. “I’ve got a sure thing waiting at his house for me. Sorry, babe, but I can’t pass him up, and Kick said he’d take you home.”
Of course he did.
Smiling at her, I said, “Okay, go. I wouldn’t expect you to give up a sure thing.”
She blew me a kiss and turned and left. When I shifted my gaze from her to Kick, I found him watching
me intently. “How did you know I’d be here tonight?” I asked.
He slid another drink across the table to me. “How do you know I didn’t go to more than one place looking for you?”
God, he was killing me tonight. I drank some of the bourbon he’d gotten me. Shit, another double. When I placed the glass back down, I said, “How many did you go to?”
He didn’t hold back. “Six.”
Fuck.
I took another drink. “Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why now, Kick? Why all of a sudden do you want to try this again, and what makes you think it would be any different to the two times we already tried to make it work?”
He raked his fingers through his hair. “It’s not all of a sudden for me, Evie. I’ve never stopped thinking of you, never stopped thinking I fucked it all up by letting you walk away. But I didn’t want to fuck your life up any further so I stayed away. I think deep down I always thought we’d find each other again when we were older. Jeremy’s death hit me hard and made me realise just how short life can be. I don’t want to wait till we’re older. I don’t want to fuck around anymore.”
I emptied my glass, taking a deep breath as the bourbon burnt on the way down. “Just because you don’t want to fuck around anymore doesn’t mean it would work. Not unless you’ve changed your idea of what being a couple is,” I said softly.
He leant his face close to mine. So close I could almost taste him. “Let me in, baby. Let me show you how I’ve changed.” Kick had never been the best at expressing his emotions but his eyes laid it all out for me.
Vulnerability, want and hope.
I placed my hand on his cheek.
One night wouldn’t hurt.
Surely.
“Show me,” I whispered.
Chapter Eight
Kick
19 years old
I pushed Evie against the wall and reached my hand under her dress to trace a pattern up her thigh. Her eyes fluttered shut for a moment and she moaned when my fingers found their way into her panties.