by Levine, Nina
I groaned. “Oh god, that man . . .”
She quirked a brow. “What’s he done now? Please tell me he’s got the stamina of an elite athlete.”
I laughed. “He really does. My vagina is so damn sore today, like it’s never been sore before.”
It was her turn to groan now. “Fuck, don’t tell me that. You can’t tell a woman who isn’t getting regular sex that your vagina has been worked into exhaustion. That shit isn’t fair.”
“Sorry, babe, but you asked,” I said as I stood and put my sunglasses on.
She stood as well and said, “Yeah, I guess I did. I’m happy for you, Evie, you deserve happiness.” I heard her genuine happiness for me in her words.
I smiled and gave her a hug. “Thank you, I’m happy for me, too.”
“Okay, I’ve gotta go and have a pedicure and wax to get ready for my sex marathon. I’ll call you on Monday and let you know if he matches your man’s skills.”
I laughed and watched her go. She’d done what I’d asked her to do after Jeremy’s funeral – she’d given me space to work through my grief without constantly checking in with me. I loved her for it, but it was good to get out and spend time with her again.
As I turned to walk to my car, I caught a glimpse of Kick’s sister. I hadn’t seen Lina in over a year and I’d missed her. My heart hurt to see how much her two kids had grown. She had two little girls – Becca, the oldest, was four, and Candace, the little one, was two. It looked like they were giving their mother a hard time so I wandered over to her to see if I could give her a hand.
“Oh my goodness, Evie!” she exclaimed when she saw me, pulling me in for a hug.
My smile beamed at her. We’d grown up together and knew so much about each other. In that moment, I wished I’d never cut contact with her. “How are you, Lina?”
She frowned. “I’m actually not feeling very well, hon. I feel like I might vomit,” she answered, clutching her stomach.
“Shit, are you okay to drive home or do you want me to drive you?” Looking closely at her, I could see how pale her face was. She really didn’t look well at all.
“Really? You wouldn’t mind driving us home?”
“Not at all,” I said and took charge.
I managed to get everyone in the car and back to her place without her vomiting. Once we were through her front door, I said, “You go to bed. I’ll look after the kids.”
She gave me a grateful look. “Thank you,” she whispered, and did as I’d said.
I turned to Becca. She was a gorgeous little red haired beauty and she gave me a smile that would melt anyone’s heart. Shit, I bet she had her Uncle Kick wrapped around her finger. “Are you hungry, sweetheart?” I asked as I lifted Candace up, resting her on my hip.
Becca nodded and said, “Yes. Mummy promised us cake if we were good at the shop.” She stared at me expectantly and I figured I needed to either find cake or make it.
I gave her a smile and held out my hand for her. “Okay then, let’s go find cake,” I said as I led her towards the kitchen. Candace babbled words I could hardly discern but I figured so long as she wasn’t crying we were good.
We had the batter made and ready to pour into the cake tin when loud banging came from the front of the house. I turned in that direction and my heart skipped a beat when I heard a thunderous, “Lina, open the fucking door!”
Shit, that sounded like Lina’s ex, and he seemed to be in a mood. I gave my attention to Becca and with forced calmness, said, “If you take Candace into her bedroom and play with her for a little while, I’ll let you have two pieces of cake when it’s ready.”
Her eyes widened with glee and she clapped her hands together. “Yes!” she exclaimed, and I felt relief as I watched her lead her sister out of the kitchen.
I pulled my phone out of my handbag and dialled Kick’s number, willing him to answer fast.
He took what felt like ages to answer, and in that time the banging on the front door got louder. “Evie. What’s up, baby?” he asked.
“Kick, can you come to Lina’s house now?” I practically begged him, my voice shaking with fear.
“Fuck, what’s wrong? And why are you at Lina’s house?”
“Long story, and I’ll fill you in later, but her ex is banging on the front door and he doesn’t sound happy.”
“Fuck,” he swore again, “hold tight, I’ll be there in about ten minutes. And whatever the fuck you do, don’t let the motherfucker in.”
“Okay,” I promised, relieved he was on his way, but unsure I’d be able to keep Dave out because at the rate he was going, he’d have the door smashed open soon.
I shouldn’t have worried, though. Kick arrived quicker than he said he would. Dave had continued to pound on the door but that was as far as he’d gotten. When I’d heard Kick’s bike pull up outside, I’d finally expelled the breath I’d been holding, and rushed to Candace’s room to make sure the girls were okay.
Relief surged through me at the sight of them playing quietly, unaware of what was happening out the front between their dad and their uncle. It killed me to know they’d grow up with a father like Dave. Unless he got his shit together, he was useless to them. Thank God they had their uncles.
I sat on the floor with them and asked, “Would you like me to read you a story?”
Becca gave me a huge smile and nodded emphatically. “Yes!”
I grabbed a book from the bookshelf behind me and after pulling Candace onto my lap, began reading, trying hard to block out thoughts of what Kick was taking care of. We read for about fifteen minutes until Becca looked up towards the bedroom door and squealed with delight. “Uncle Kick!” she exclaimed, and ran to him.
He caught her and scooped her up into his arms. “Hey darlin’, are you being good for Evie?” he asked, his full attention on her as if she was the most important person in the world.
Oh my.
My tummy fluttered. I’d forgotten how good Kick was with kids. There was something extremely sexy to me about a man who had the time of day for the kids in his life.
I stood, taking Candace with me, and my eyes met Kick’s a moment later. Surprisingly, he didn’t appear as if he’d just been in a fight, which I’d been expecting. I’d imagined blood smeared on his clothes or at least a much more dishevelled appearance, but he looked almost like he had when I’d left him that morning.
His concerned gaze assessed me. “You okay?” he asked softly.
I nodded. “Yes. Thank you so much for coming. Is everything sorted?”
“Yeah, he’s gone, and I don’t think he’ll show up here like that again, but the asshole doesn’t seem to learn his lessons very fast, so who knows?”
Becca smacked her uncle on the shoulder. “You said a bad word, Uncle Kick,” she chastised him, a stern look written on her face.
I suppressed a laugh, and watched with interest as he handled the situation. “I’m sorry, darlin’. I’ll try not to say it again, yeah?”
She pressed her lips together, trying hard to emulate her mother. I’d seen Lina give her that very look. “You’re always saying bad words. I’ll have to tell Mummy on you.”
Laughter bubbled up, and I managed to hold it in, but I had to walk away to stop Becca from seeing my body shake with it. I took Candace into the kitchen, catching snippets of Becca telling Kick off.
When they joined us a couple of minutes later, he gave me a dirty look and said, “Thanks for that.”
“For what?” I asked as I checked the cake I’d placed in the oven. The girls had scampered off to the lounge room to the television.
He grabbed me around the waist. “For leaving me alone with a four-year-old I had to defend myself to,” he said, pressing a kiss to my lips.
“Well, you shouldn’t use that language around her.”
He groaned. “Do you know how fuckin’ hard it is to stop myself from swearing around them?”
“What does Lina say?” I asked, loving seeing Kick squirm, but mostly
just loving the fact he cared about it.
Lina’s voice came from behind me. “Lina tells him not to do it, but do you think anyone can tell Kick what to do?”
I laughed and turned out of Kick’s embrace to face her. She looked a little better. “How are you feeling?”
“A little better,” she said, walking towards us. “What word did you say?” she asked Kick, giving him a dirty look.
He held up his hands in a defensive gesture. “I didn’t say fuck, that’s for fuckin’ sure,” he muttered.
She shook her head and smacked his chest. “Well, don’t say it now, for goodness’ sake!”
“All I said was asshole,” he admitted.
Pointing a finger at him, she bossed him, “Don’t say it again. I’m gonna start charging you, I think.” Giving me her attention, she said, “Thank you for this afternoon. I really appreciate it.”
I grimaced. “We had a visitor while you were asleep,” I admitted, not wanting to have to tell her.
At her frown, Kick stepped in with an explanation. “Dave came over. He was drunk again and bashing on the front door to be let in, so Evie called me and I came and took care of him.”
“Thank you,” she said, her voice full of exhaustion. “How did you get him to leave?”
“Let’s just say we had words.” Kick’s face had that closed-off look I knew well; he had no intention of telling her what those words had been.
“Did you guys get in a fight?” Lina asked, knowing her brother well.
“No, but I’m telling you, Lina, that if he keeps turning up like he did today, we will be having more than words.”
She opened her mouth to say something but a knock at the door interrupted us.
Shit, who was it now?
“Wait here,” Kick said as he strode to the front door and opened it. “Fuck,” he muttered, and I wondered who the hell it was, “what are you doing here?”
A voice I hadn’t heard in years sounded, and my stomach dropped. “Well, that’s a lovely way to greet your mother, Kick.”
Chapter Fourteen
Kick
Fuck, could this day get any worse?
I stepped aside and let my mother enter. Actually, I had no choice, because she barged her way in before I could stop her. I closed the door after her and turned to see Evie’s face had paled. She looked like she’d seen a ghost, and I guessed she had.
My mother.
The reason for so much of her heartache growing up.
“Mum,” Lina said, sounding anything but pleased to see her, “what are you doing here?”
Mum’s back stiffened. “Am I not allowed to visit my daughter and grandchildren?”
Jesus, bring on the fucking guilt trip.
Lina scowled. “You never just drop by out of the blue. Not unless you want something.” The unspoken accusation sat between them.
Mum’s hand went to her hip and I could just imagine the superior look on her face. “That’s not true -” She stopped mid-sentence and her head turned to look at Evie. “What the hell are you doing here? I thought my son had seen the error of his ways years ago.” Before Evie could respond, Mum looked at me and said, “Please don’t tell me she’s here because you are?”
I stalked to where she stood, and, fuming, said, “You don’t get to come here and say that shit to or about Evie.” My body buzzed with anger at her attitude, and my breaths were coming hard and fast. “Besides, what I do is none of your business anymore.”
“Yes, you made that perfectly clear two years ago, Kick, but just because you stop seeing me and try to tell me what is and what isn’t my business, doesn’t mean I’m not interested to know what’s happening in your life.” Her eyes were still as vacant as they’d been my entire life. The words were coming out of her mouth but she didn’t mean them.
My mother. The shallowest woman I’d ever had the misfortune of knowing.
“You’ve never been interested in my life,” I spat. “The only thing Veronica Hanson is interested in is Veronica Hanson.”
Her eyes flared with anger. And a tiny bit of hatred. My mother held a lot of resentment in her soul, and her kids and husband had been wrapped up in that resentment for years. We’d held her back; stifled her life plans. Apparently. “How the hell did you come from me?” she demanded to know.
“That’s a really good fuckin’ question.”
“Kick!” Lina interjected, her eyes glaring at me.
Fuck, the fuckin’ swearwords.
I quickly glanced at the kids who were busy watching television. Thank fuck, they didn’t need to be involved in this shit. I turned back to my mother. “I don’t know how the hell any of your kids turned out okay after being subjected to your nastiness and bitchiness while we were growing up, but you did manage to screw Evie up, so there is that.”
Evie caught my attention when she took a step in my direction, a distraught look on her face. She found my eyes and whatever she saw there stopped her. “Kick . . .” she began, but I cut her off.
“No, Evie, she needs to hear this. So her husband screwed around on her and then took it one step further and slept with her best friend. It doesn’t give her the right to take that shit out on the kids in her life, one of them being you. Just because her husband slept with your mother doesn’t give her the fuckin’ right to label you . . . a fuckin’ innocent teenager in all that . . . a slut, and spread nasty rumours about you.” My heart pumped furiously in my chest as years of hurt and anger roared to the surface. I jabbed my finger at my mother. “That shit ain’t fuckin’ right!”
Jesus!
I began pacing in the small space I occupied, fully aware I was close to losing my shit completely. Evie and Lina stared at me in horror. None of this had ever been confronted. Our families had splintered apart after Evie’s sister died, and we’d shattered completely after Dad slept with Loretta six months later. As far as I was concerned, this conversation was about eighteen years too late.
“You’ve got no idea what I went through! What your father did to me!” my mother screamed at me, the vacant look in her eyes long gone, replaced with bitterness and pure hatred.
“I don’t give a shit what my father did to you! You should have been more concerned about your children but instead, I spent my whole life chasing your affection . . . chasing your love. You were more concerned with trying to make yourself look good so that people would think you were this amazing mother and amazing person when that was so damn far from the truth.”
She stared wildly at me, her chest heaving, and her face flushed with anger. “You’ve grown into an asshole, Kick. That club is obviously no good for you but that’s what you get for abandoning your family as soon as you could.”
Was she for fucking real?
Funny how someone’s memories of how something went down can be so wrong.
I jabbed my finger at her again, the adrenaline coursing through my veins needing an outlet, and a finger jab seemed like a much better option than the punch I wanted to throw. I’d never punch a woman, but the wall was looking more and more attractive. The kids were the only thing holding me back at this point. “I joined Storm because they were more of a family to me than you and Dad ever were,” I fumed. “You can’t abandon something that isn’t there in the first place. Dad was long gone, and you were never there. And I never fuckin’ abandoned Lina or Braden.”
The rage circling the room threatened to choke me.
I need to get out of here.
Without another glance at my mother, I turned and stalked out of the house. Once I’d made it to the footpath, I placed my hands behind my head to grip the back of my neck. “Fuck!” I roared into the air, pushing a chunk of pent up frustration out.
I paced the footpath for a few minutes until Mum came storming out of the house towards her car. “Don’t ever talk to me again, Kick. I don’t want anything to do with you ever again!” she yelled as she threw her bag in the car.
“Consider it done!” I thundered, and turned
my back as she backed out of the driveway and sped off. “Fuck!” I yelled again, desperately trying to get the rage out that was trapped in my body.
Evie came running out of the house, towards me. I held my hand up, signalling for her to stop, to not come anywhere near me, because I couldn’t be sure of my actions at the moment.
She slowed her advance but didn’t stop, her eyes pleading with me to let her close.
To let her in.
“No, Evie, don’t come any closer!” I yelled, hating the words as they left my lips but unable to stop them from falling out. I needed to keep her safe and I wasn’t safe.
She didn’t fucking stop.
She came right up to me and a moment later, her hand landed on my arm. “Kick,” she said, her voice calm.
Full of love.
My mind flickered with a chaotic mess of thoughts.
So jumbled.
So confused.
I tried to claw through them but instead I was drowning in them.
I was drowning in my life.
A childhood of abandonment, an adolescence of hurt and grief, a life of regret.
Her arms circled me. “Kick,” she soothed me as she pulled me close.
Love.
Evie’s love clawed through the thoughts.
It pushed the pain aside as it reached for my heart.
For my soul.
Home.
Family.
Evie is my family.
I took a deep breath and put my arms around her. “Evie,” I whispered, “I love you.”
Her hand ran up and down my neck, in and out of my hair. “I love you, too, baby,” she whispered.
I clung to her for a long time, allowing the anger and hurt to seep out of me. Eventually, I pulled away from Evie and asked, “How did you know?”
She frowned. “How did I know what?”
“That I needed you. That it would be okay to ignore me and come to me even when I told you not to,” I said, not letting her eyes go, needing them to stay with me and silently tell me the secrets of her heart that her words couldn’t.