by Levine, Nina
I stumbled as I tried to avoid the cracks in the path as I walked the short distance between my front gate and my front door. I wasn’t sure if it was because of the heels I wore or the rum I’d consumed, but I leaned heavily towards the rum. Unfortunately when I decided to drown my feelings with alcohol, I did a bang-up job of it. My feelings were successfully numbed for the night. The only problem with that was they would all return tomorrow. Missing my brother was something that would never go away.
As I pushed open my front door, a figure emerged from the shadows on my veranda and a deep voice I’d heard too many times that day, spoke into my ear, “You’ve been drinking, Vegas. Not the best move when people are after you. You’re lucky it’s me here tonight and not someone else.”
As I attempted to process what he said, he placed a hand on the small of my back and guided both of us inside.
Fuck.
He was right; I should have known better. I should have done everything to maintain my vigilance, but the painful memories had assaulted me and rum had been my only escape.
And now Nitro was inside my fucking house.
He directed me down my hallway to the kitchen before my mind finally kicked into gear. As it did, I forced my elbow back into his gut and picked up my pace to move ahead of him.
“Fuck,” he swore as I stepped out of his hold.
Turning to face him, I reached into my handbag for the pocketknife I kept there. Flicking it open, I held it between us defensively. “Don’t take another fucking step.”
Surprise flared in his eyes and he stopped moving. “Go fucking figure,” he murmured.
“Go figure what?” I snapped.
He watched me silently for a few moments before stepping forward. His damn reflexes were faster than mine and he swiftly took the knife from me. His hard eyes met mine. “You’ve got a thing for knives, Vegas?”
I slammed my hands against his chest. “Why the fuck do you keep calling me Vegas?”
A vein pulsed in his temple and he clenched his jaw. “Because you’re pretty on the outside but dark and dirty”—he pressed a finger to my chest—“in here.”
My breaths lay trapped in my throat as heat flamed my cheeks. I stared at him while self-loathing filled me. He had no idea how right he was. “Fuck you,” I spat, taking a step back, almost stumbling again.
With a clenched jaw and flared nostrils, he lunged forward, catching me around the waist. He then backed me up against the wall, pressing his body hard against mine. Our breaths came hard and fast as we glared at each other. “I recognise fucked-up when I see it, Tatum. It’s like looking in a fucking mirror.”
I wiggled my arms up between our bodies so I could try to force some space between us, even if it was only a tiny amount of distance. The pain this all caused was almost too much, but no way would I show him that. Instead, I focused on breathing through it, hoping it would subside quickly. “I am nothing like you.”
He nodded. “Yeah, you are. I’ve done my research.”
I swallowed hard, taking in what he’d said while trying to force my shame away. It didn’t matter how many times I told myself I’d moved past my self-disgust, it was a lie; it still consumed me.
When I didn’t speak, he continued, “I don’t know what drives a lawyer to forget which side of the law she’s on, but I’m guessing it was something she’s not proud of. And then, after her profession kicks her out, to go to work for the dirty criminals of this city, getting them out of shit any way she can, that says a fuck-of-a-lot about a person. So don’t tell me you’re not fucked-up because not only do I recognise it, I’ve read all about it, too.”
I pushed against him, but he was too heavy and strong for me, and didn’t budge. I wanted to scream at him and kick him and beat against his chest, but I knew it wouldn’t get me anywhere. Nitro had me trapped. In the end, I simply said, “What do you want?”
He kept me caged against the wall. “Silver Hell know you were in that room when I killed their man. They’re looking for you.”
Of course they were.
Fucking brilliant.
“So you’ve come to save me? Like a white fucking knight?”
Anger growled out of him. “That fucking attitude of yours will get you killed one day, but today is not that day. I’m only here because you mean something to Billy and at the moment he means something to Storm. The minute that changes, you’re on your fucking own.” He stepped away from me, but kept his hard eyes on mine. “Now, pack some shit, because you’re coming with me.”
He had to be kidding. “So you can tie me up again and chain me to your fucking bed?”
His boots thudded as he closed the distance between us again. Taking hold of my arm, he yanked me with him while he stalked into my bedroom. I did my best to ignore the pain his grip caused, but it was too intense and a cry fell from my mouth. He scowled at me, as if he wanted me to contain it. “Pack your bag or I’ll pack it for you.”
He left me then and I sat on my bed, desperate to gather my thoughts. The alcohol hindered my ability to think straight, as did the pain racking my body.
Fuck.
A knock on my front door caused my head to snap up. I groaned when I heard Duvall call out, “Tatum.” And when I heard Nitro’s boots cut a path to the door, I practically ran in that direction. The last thing I needed was Duvall going up against Nitro.
I arrived just in time to see Duvall’s eyes flare with distaste as he took in Nitro. “Who the hell are you?” he asked. He knew the kind of people I worked with, which meant he also understood the risk I took with my personal safety. I guessed he was concerned for me, and that was something I needed to alter if I had any hope of him leaving.
Staring at my friend, willing him to go, I said, “What’s up?”
Jerking his chin at Nitro, he said, “This is how you’re spending your nights now?”
“Careful,” Nitro warned in a deep voice. “The next words out of your mouth better not insult either her or me.” It surprised me that he’d even care about me being insulted, but I didn’t have time to dissect that.
Duvall stepped closer and by the angry expression on his face, I knew he was about to disregard that warning, so I cut him off.
“Yes, this is how I’m spending my nights,” I said, knowing he’d back down if he believed I was seeing Nitro. He might have wanted to start something with me, but Duvall never cut in on another man’s territory.
He pursed his lips. “Really? You’re a biker whore now?”
Nitro growled again, anger spilling out of him. When he took a step forward, my instincts took over and I flung an arm out in front of him, covering his chest and halting his progress. His eyes came to mine, a hard glint in them. I returned that look, now willing him to not turn this into something more.
I glanced at Duvall as I angled my body towards Nitro and placed my arms around him. “Yes, really. Did you come here to tell me something?” I hated treating him like this but felt it was the only way.
Nitro’s body tensed and he didn’t reciprocate my gesture. I couldn’t see his face, but I could imagine he’d fixed a filthy look on Duvall.
Taking a step back, Duvall said, “No, nothing that can’t wait. I’d hate to interrupt you two.” With that, he muttered something else under his breath and strode down my path towards his car.
As soon as he was out of sight, I dropped my arms and returned to my bedroom, resigned to the fact I had to go with Nitro. The front door slamming caused me to jump, and a moment later, Nitro filled the doorway to my bedroom. “You ready?”
“No, I’m not ready. I’d barely started thinking about packing when I had to come and stop my friend from trying to take you on.”
He crossed his arms over his chest. “You call him a friend?” The way he said it was as if it was the last thing he’d call Duvall.
“Yes.” I didn’t encourage any further discussion about it, because I had no desire to hear his thoughts.
He had other ideas. “So you’r
e okay with a friend treating you like shit?”
I grabbed an overnight bag from my closet and started packing it. “He didn’t treat me like shit.”
He cocked a brow. “You really believe that, Vegas?”
I stopped throwing clothes in the bag. “You don’t know anything about my friendship with him or why he said the things he did to me.”
“That may be the case, but I still don’t believe a friend would insult you the way he did. I sure as fuck wouldn’t put up with that.”
“I’m not interested in what you think. I just want to get through whatever I have to in order to forget I ever met you and your biker friends. Do you think we can do that?”
He dropped his arms. “It’d be my fucking pleasure.”
I took a few deep breaths after he left and then finished packing my bag.
One day at a time. That was all I had to do. If I could get through the shit Randall put me through, and the crap I went through at the hands of the legal world, I could survive a biker.
Nitro
“Me, Myself And I” by G-Eazy, Bebe Rexha
Renee stared at me as Tatum and I entered the house. I never brought women home. Ignoring her puzzled expression, I directed Tatum to my bedroom.
She stopped as soon as she realised where I was taking her. “I am not sleeping in your bed.”
“It’s either that or the floor. Take your pick.”
She left me to make her way to the couch. Dropping her bag on the floor, she took a seat and stared at the television that Renee was watching.
Renee’s eyes widened as she glanced between Tatum and me. “Hi, I’m Renee, Nitro’s niece,” she said, giving Tatum a smile.
I couldn’t see Tatum’s face, but I could hear the tightness in her voice when she replied. “Tatum, and I’m Nitro’s prisoner.”
Renee’s smile disappeared. “A prisoner wouldn’t come willingly and I’m pretty sure that’s what I just saw.” Even when she was frustrated or mad with me, that kid was on my side.
“Trust me, if I had a choice I wouldn’t be here,” Tatum muttered.
“And if you weren’t here, you’d be out there dead,” I said.
She swivelled in her seat to look at me, as much irritation on her face as I felt. “I could have gone to Billy’s. He’d keep me alive.”
“When I want someone kept alive, I trust no one to do that job except myself. You’ll stay with me until the threat passes.”
Bewilderment filled her as she left her seat. Grimacing, she clutched her ribs and said, “That is never gonna happen. That threat could take forever to pass.”
“During which time you’ll be with me,” I barked.
“So what, you’re gonna take me with you everywhere you go? And what about my job? I’ve got shit to do.”
“That’s what phones are for, Tatum. And yeah, you’ll be with me. Where I go, you fucking go.” Jesus, she had a way of riling me up that usually only Renee or Marilyn managed to do. I didn’t often give a fuck what most women said or did. And I sure as hell didn’t spend time arguing with them over it.
She stood fuming at me but didn’t utter another word. Eventually, she sat and resumed staring at the television with her arms crossed over her chest.
Renee stole one last glance at the both of us before leaning back in her seat and saying, “Well, this should be fun.”
* * *
I yawned as I made coffee the next morning. It had been a long night and I’d only managed about three hours of sleep on and off. Lifting the mug to my mouth, I eyed Tatum as she entered the kitchen. My gaze dropped to the singlet she wore. It was long and covered her ass, but her legs were bare and I couldn’t take my eyes off them or the tattoos inked into her skin.
“I need coffee. Your floor is hard as hell,” she grumbled.
I leaned against the counter. “All floors are hard as hell. I offered you a bed.”
She moved next to me to make her coffee. “Sleeping next to you is the last thing I will ever do.”
Her scent wafted in the air and I froze as a long-forgotten memory surfaced. Visions of a smiling woman and three children laughing at the beach filled my mind.
My mother.
The scent Tatum wore was the same one my mother had worn.
I shoved the memories away. Nothing good came from them. I glanced down at Tatum. “Aren’t you cold?” I snapped. “It’s the middle of fucking winter and you’re wearing a singlet.”
She looked up at me. “My, aren’t you a cuddly teddy in the morning? And since when do you care about my warmth or comfort?”
I drank the rest of my coffee and pushed off from the counter to place my mug in the sink. “Put some clothes on. We’re leaving in half an hour.”
“I won’t be ready in half an hour, Nitro.”
I turned back to face her. “Yeah, you will be.”
As I left the kitchen, she called after me, “I don’t know what kinds of women you’ve been associating with, but this one does not get ready in half a fucking hour.”
Renee passed me in the hallway, already dressed for school. She was an early riser and had probably already completed an hour of study. “You know, I think I kinda like Tatum,” she said with a smile.
Ignoring her, I walked outside and sucked some air into my lungs. Between Tatum’s attitude, Renee’s smartass comments, my sister’s mental breakdown, Storm’s problems and memories of my mother, this week was going off with a fucking bang.
My phone rang then, and one look at the caller ID told me the week was only just getting started with me.
My brother.
* * *
“I need somewhere to stay,” Dustin said ten minutes later when he arrived at my house.
I pushed my fingers through my hair as I listened to my brother. “What happened to the place I found you three weeks ago?” I’d found him a share house and helped him move in, hoping he’d settle there okay. It seemed he hadn’t.
His lips flattened in a hard line. “The woman who ran it kicked me out.”
“Fuck, what did you do?”
“I didn’t do anything. I just tried to kiss her.”
Jesus, Dustin would be the fucking death of me.
I slammed my hand down on my table. “I’ve told you, Dustin, you can’t go around kissing women you aren’t involved with.”
He jumped and his eyes widened. I tried never to lose my temper with him, so my outburst must have confused him. “I don’t.”
Blowing out a long breath, I said, “Yeah, you do. Problem is, they don’t know you like I do, so they don’t know you’d never force yourself on them.” Dustin was a simple guy looking for love, who had no clue how to attract a woman. Most women didn’t give him the time of day so he tried harder than most men had to. Unfortunately, his efforts were mostly misguided and ended up in these kinds of outcomes—him inappropriately touching women, them crying foul and me cleaning up his shit.
“Can I stay here until I find somewhere?” The hopeful look on his face caused my guilt to surface. If it weren’t for me, he wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place.
I nodded. “Yeah.”
A grin broke out on his face and he threw his arms around me. “Thank you, Nitro.” As if I’d caused some miracle to happen.
The bathroom door opened across the hall from where we stood and a gust of perfume blanketed us. Our attention was drawn to Tatum who exited the room and announced, “I’m good to go. Quickest fucking time I’ve ever gotten ready, which means you”—she pointed at me—“owe me coffee.”
“Wow,” Dustin exclaimed while staring at Tatum. She’d dressed in skin-tight jeans again, this time with knee-high boots that had a killer heel. The jeans showed off her legs and ass while the black fitted long-sleeved top she wore could stop traffic. And although bruises and some swelling still painted her face, her beauty couldn’t be mistaken.
“Put your tongue back in your mouth,” I said, not taking my eyes off her for one second. I didn’t need to l
ook at him to know he was drooling. Any straight male would be.
Tatum shifted her gaze to Dustin and did something I hadn’t seen yet—she smiled. When she moved to where he stood and extended her hand in greeting, my breathing slowed and my chest expanded. All the tension I’d felt a moment ago vanished and I watched in fascination as she spoke to him.
“Hi, I’m Tatum. I’m guessing you’re Nitro’s brother.” Her smile filled her face while she waited for his reply.
He shook her hand and I knew his shyness had kicked in by the way his body shrunk a little and his eyes turned down. “How can you tell? We don’t look anything alike.” Even his voice had softened and turned hesitant. Disbelieving. He had a point; no one ever assumed we were brothers.
“Oh, I can tell. You have the same nose and even though your eyes have more sparkle in them, they’re the same beautiful brown that his eyes are.” I was fairly certain she’d never thought of my eye colour as beautiful, but I appreciated her referring to his as that. God knew, Dustin could do with the confidence boost.
I watched as my brother, for the first time in his life, visibly drew his body up and puffed his shoulders back. Returning her smile, he said, “I’m Dustin.”
“It’s great to meet you, Dustin.” Facing me, she lifted her brows and said, “You’re gonna need some more linen and maybe a mattress or two if we’re all gonna be staying here.”
I fought the smile tugging at my lips. Grabbing my keys off the table, I muttered, “Smartass.”
She shrugged. “Just stating facts. I don’t wanna sleep on that floor again.”
I held her gaze. “And I told you how to avoid that.”
She pursed her lips but didn’t say anything else on the subject.
“Can I come, too?” Dustin asked.
I shook my head. “No, you stay here. There’s ice cream in the freezer and noodles in the cupboard.” His two favourites.
His face lit up. “And Netflix.”
Tatum smiled. “Netflix is the best.”